This is Tim. Tim has become too powerful and it's gotten to his head. Time to teach him a lesson and kick his ass. LV 1 HP 1000/1000 EXP 0/20
punch him in the testicles.
Plug a giant power cord into his face socket.
Give him a swift kick in the rear.
Get Chuck Norris.
The most devastating blows are emotional. Tell Tim you were never really friends and hes been a huge disappointment
>>680626 This
>too powerful >LV 1 I call bullshit! Who are you and why are you trying to trick us into destroying this harmless asshole?
He dodges the first blow.
Then the second.
He receives a swift kick i the rear
Chuck norris has been summoned. LV 1 HP 995/1000 EXP 5/20
>The most devastating blows are emotional. Tell Tim you were never really friends and hes been a huge disappointment He looks at you and replies. "Yeah? well I fucked your mom."
>He looks at you and replies. "Yeah? well I fucked your mom." So that explains where you got the syphilis. >destroy him Report the thread as spam so he gets deleted.
>Report the thread as spam so he gets deleted. Tim smiles. "You could, but that wouldn't destroy me. i would just have to go somewhere else. Somewhere with less cowards that hide behind the backs of their superiors."
hyuuu~ Alright, ladies and gentlemen, I have an idea. We can just make things appear? *tosses bombs* Let's see him handle those eh?
>*tosses bombs* Chuck Norris looked at the bomb and instantly the bomb defused itself. Amazing.
*unsummon Chuck Norris* *summon more bombs*
>>680652 Wait, we have to defeat Chuck Norris too? This is impossible.
Oh, so you think you're invincible? Try this on for size!!! Tim's Class is Fat Lazy Asshole Stat Changes Upon Next Level Up: Str: +40 (Physical Strength. Determines the efficiency of muscle mass to energy consumption, and how much energy is consumed) Spd: -20 (Physical Speed. Determines the speed of all physical actions) End: -20 (Physical Endurance. Resilience to physical attacks.) Int: -20 (Mental attacks. Used to use magic and technology in combat.) Luk: +40 (Also known as the Instinct stat. Allows for split-second decision making that is fairly accurate) Wis: -20 (Mental defenses. Also increases resistance to insanity and morale-debilitating attacks) Next Perk: Panic Attack (Increases Int and Luk by 25%, decreases Wis by 25%. Auto-activated with mental attacks.) (Standard Net Stat Growth is +10*level. The price of the usual Perk costs approximately 10*level stat points. Effectively, most of the time the next level either increases a character's stats or gives them a new perk.) Now apologize or this is going to HURT. Also, drive a car into Tim.
Wait, why is Chuck Norris protecting someone powerful instead of wrecking his shit. Doesn't that run counter to the very nature of his fundamental meme.
>>680659 Summon Bruce Lee to defeat Chuck Norris, obviously.
So... it's finally come to this... UNLEASH THE INFINITE BEES!!!!
Summon an infinite amount of Tims and cry because the addition of yet more Tims has only made the issue worse.
Drop several bags of holding into one another simultaneously.
>>680720 Veto! Veto!
Use an eraser to physically erase Tim.
summon Charles Nelson Reilly
Chuck Norris politely leaves and in his place bombs were summoned.
Tim climbs onto the wire to get out of dodge of the bombs. slightly seared but he is fine. "Like hell am I going to apologize, you can't change my stats and class." >Also, drive a car into Tim. The car crashes into the wall.
>UNLEASH THE INFINITE BEES!!!! The bees comth, and don't see tim.
>summon Charles Nelson Reilly He has been summoned. Tim looks down. "augh, what a mess, you know what? lets see where this wire goes." He climbs the wire.
"huh." LV 1 HP 985/1000 EXP 15/20
>>680762 Drop a floor buster bomb, to drop him back into the bees.
>>680763 This. Also a force or telekinesis user to shove him down into the bees.
Summon Tims evil(er) twin, Yim!
>Drop a floor buster bomb, to drop him back into the bees. >This. Also a force or telekinesis user to shove him down into the bees. >Summon Tims evil(er) twin, Yim! A bomb, telekinesis user, and Yim were summoned.
In an act of self preservation, the telekinesis user throws the bomb down the hole. Yim is grumbling about stupid players and their stupid powers dragging him into his stupid brothers mess.
uhhh... okay two things *return telekenetic&Yim to their prior locations* We're to whoop Tim right? *grins* I've an idea. *summons bucket of acid over Tim's head*
the floor is lava, everyone besides tim is given a pair of lavaproof boots. if the boots are taken off, ether by the person wearing them or a third party, they magically vanish.
>*summons bucket of acid over Tim's head* >the floor is lava, everyone besides tim is given a pair of lavaproof boots. if the boots are taken off, ether by the person wearing them or a third party, they magically vanish. The floor is now lava sand acid is mixing into it. Tim climbs back onto the wire. The TK user's robes catch on fire.
>>680775 Coat Tim in honey to attract bees.
Tim, feeling pity for them,pulls the TK user out of the lava. "GAAAAAAAAY" Yells Yim.
>Coat Tim in honey to attract bees. Tim is now coated in honey. Too bad the bees were exploded by he bomb.
well crap. Okay...so first things first: DRAGON ATTACK!!!
Send in the honey-badgers, then.
Hold up, do we need to kick Tim's ass? Sure, he might be powerful and gotten to his head but he hasn't done anything bad with it as far as we can tell. Like, do we REALLY need to 'Destroy Him'?
>>680785 SUMMON GULO
Summon a Lava proof bear made out of bees.
>>680780 yo psyker, sorry bout your robe man. >refresh robes
>>680780 I cast magic missile at Tim.
>DRAGON ATTACK!!! >SUMMON GULO >refresh robes >Summon a Lava proof bear made out of bees. Tim looks like he's cornered now! There's monsters everywhere and there isn't an exit to be seen. Well, at least TK has some nice new robes.
Tim drops down past the, now nonexistent first room into the room below it. He takes massive damage! LV 1 HP 785/1000 EXP 215/20
Well, as long as TK's getting new robes, let's enhance them. Change TK's robes to Robes of Permanent Immolation, to burn Tim, and grant TK increased protection.
Tim levelled up! Twice! As a levelling perk he earns the ability to fly. "Gonna be a lot harder now, huh?" Tim says. "Not that you did much to begin with!" LV 3 HP 785/1000 EXP 215/500
>Change TK's robes to Robes of Permanent Immolation, to burn Tim, and grant TK increased protection. TK gets some sweet new gear.
more bees
>more bees oh. Tim stays still as to not agitate the bees. TK is still pretty unconscious at the moment.
>>680832 Time for TENTACLES
>>680833 I agree, time for sodomy.
Summon COrPulent Ambient Fake Eldritch Emergence Lake with STINGING TENTACLED MAGGOTS
>>680831 Summon a wizard to cast a heart attack spell on him or something
>Time for TENTACLES Tentacles were summoned.
The tentacles agitate the bees. Tim pulls TK away from the fighting forces. he pulls out some stove popcorn out of his inventory and makes pop corn while the two forces of evil duke it out.
>Summon COrPulent Ambient Fake Eldritch Emergence Lake with STINGING TENTACLED MAGGOTS The location of the tentacles is revealed.
>Summon a wizard to cast a heart attack spell on him or something A wizard appears and casts a heart attack spell on Tim. Unfortunately Tim has no heart to stop. Tim offers the wizard some popcorn.
Summon Agitated Kernel-Pult
maizemancer who rips the ingested kernals out though tim's flesh.
Man fuck this divide by zero
Let the wizard take some popcorn, then detonate wizard.
Call in the patriots. We're going to clone him using the Les Enfants Terribles program. Make the perfect soldier... To destroy Tim...
Offer Tim a tall, frosty steel mug of liquid oxygen, add flinty gravel to the floor, then spray powdered aluminum and volatile hydrocarbons everywhere. Fuel-air kaboom.
Convert precisely half of Tim's mass into antimatter.
Redefine the popcorn as spontaneous explosive, comparable to nitroglycerin. Soak his clothing in gasoline too while we're at it.
[Send Tim a healing potion]
Damnit, this is the story of how Tim becomes the Omnimancer, isn't it. Summon Tim the Omnimancer from Wild Wizard Tournament (http://tgchan.org/kusaba/quest/res/678701.html). I want to see how this goes.
I don't think any of you understand, just some bees won't do. We either need to encase Tim in a series of incrementally smaller indestructible orbs which we can then fill with lava. Or we need to summon INFINITE hyper aggressive death bees.
Summon a small ghost girl with a grudge against Tim with the ability to heal and relive allies.
teleport tim onto the event horizon ship, with Shodan as it's AI, and warp that into the hellscape to hang out with pinhead and the other cenobites for a bit.
>>680876 Send Tim a bottle of poison disguised as a healing potion.
>>680905 Send Tim a bottle of used dishwater after Sushi Friday.
hyuuu~! Guys, we need to co-ordinate our attacks because at this rate we're just gonna keep making things that crash into each other.
Provide Tim with a shotgun. Give him cookies if he shoots himself in the gut three exactly three times. The cookies will be poisoned with extreme poison of killing people and also dieing and exploding (except not really) and tell him the antidote is in the fourth shotgun shell which is laced with bees.
>Summon Agitated Kernel-Pult "Ow."
>maizemancer who rips the ingested kernals out though tim's flesh. The amazing Maize Master is summoned onto the scene as Tim gives out popcorn. Their introduction is cut short by one earth shattering kaboom.
Maximum damage! Timm is now partially blinded! >Redefine the popcorn as spontaneous explosive, comparable to nitroglycerin. Soak his clothing in gasoline too while we're at it. The popcorn was destroyed by the blast, but now tim is soaked in gasoline. LV 4 HP 385/1000 EXP 615/1000
>Summon a small ghost girl with a grudge against Tim with the ability to heal and relive allies. They're aliiive! "Oh, hey abi... You're here too now? Still hate me? ... Yeah, i would hate me too."
>Send Tim a bottle of used dishwater >Send Tim a bottle of poison disguised as a healing potion. >[Send Tim a healing potion] >Provide Tim with a shotgun. Tim is presented with a choice. He briefly considering it but declined.
Summon a deadly airborne virus, tailored to target Tim's DNA.
>Summon Tim the Omnimancer from Wild Wizard Tournament HE IS TOO BUSY TRAINING HIS NEW APPRENTICE. >Convert precisely half of Tim's mass into antimatter. You discover you can't even move him without a summon. >Offer Tim a tall, frosty steel mug of liquid oxygen "Fuck no, get that shit away from me." Tim politely declines. >Call in the patriots. You call in the patriots. They might take a while unfortunately.
Block off all exits using the least destructible material we can conjure, let Abi do her thing. If that doesn't work flood the room with deadly neurotoxin. If that doesn't work fill the room with chlorine trifluoride.
>>681021 Oh, and cancel all impending summons, operation gas chamber must not be interrupted!
Summon Tim Made of Antimatter and allow him to interact with the ordinary-matter universe.
>Block off all exits using the least destructible material we can conjure, let Abi do her thing. If that doesn't work flood the room with deadly neurotoxin. If that doesn't work fill the room with chlorine trifluoride. The exits are blocked and it looks like its finally the end for Tim.
In a last ditch effort he takes the poison and the health potion and drinks them both at once.
It feels like there's a war going on in his body, but somehow he managing to pull through. Level up! LV 5 HP 6/1000 EXP 1444/∞ Tim gained the most powerful ability of all, to summon.
He summons a portal to get him and the others the hell out of there.
Is it over? LV 5 HP 1/1000 EXP 1444/∞
Screw it RELEASE THE ZOMBIES Next.
FOREIGN RUNNAWAY CATGIRL ATTAAAAAAAAACK!
>>681031 send up a hunter to kick him, winning the hunt.
Antimatter Tim, now.
Summon Mit, Tim's magical clone that will fight him to the death and ensure he stays dead.
Did I not say /0 fuck it Tim get in here and help us kill Tim.
On wait what I meant was Tim the Omnimancer help us kill Tim.
Tim! Don't give up!
Summon ten pounds of actual antimatter, not shaped like Tim, not alive, just ten pound of antimatter. "10 pounds of antimatter contains 195.2 megatons of destructive force. This is more yield than the most powerful H-bomb exploded to date."
Wake the TK user and wizard. Open a portal to where Tim just left so Abi can finish him off and totally not remove everything we just summoned.
Bring Abi to Tim's current location. Give TK the option to leave if they want to. Ask Tim if he has reconsidered joining the Council.
Make it rain infinite knives onto Tim.
>>681092 Veto, but if we do do this then send some antimatter over there too, just to be sure.
Cover the portal with a force field, so that when he tries to toss the antimatter though he fails.
>>681120 Heheh "toss antimatter" he says, good luck with that one, Tim.
>>681031 we were just supposed to kick his ass guys chill
>>681172 Killing him is just kicking his ass permanently.
>>681031 >TK&Wizard: Return the favor Since Tim saved your lives, get an abjuration/TK shield up to protect against all the bullshit flying at you.
>>681178 WHY DO YOU ATTEMPT TO SABOTAGE US SO? Unsummon all living summons. Tim. Must. Die.
Summon a black hole to trap Tim for eternity, if not kill him.
>>681031 >1hp Cast magic missile. Low damage, but 100% accuracy. And that's all we need.
>>681207 Tim has done nothing but help people while you've thrown this shit at him. He doesn't deserve this at all, narrator a faggot.
>>681031 Yes. You are beyond our jurisdiction forever. >Learn Valuable Lesson
>>681245 >>681245 >>681245 >>681245
>>681245 >>681254 >>681279 But he's such an asshole!
Can we summon an infinite number of Tims now? Wait can Tim read this? Is he going to summon an infinite number of Tims? OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
guys. I have a simple solution. *delays until other actions are taken* *deploys 1 trillion hostile bats* Let's see what happens.
>>681393 Bats are actually made of antimatter.
>>681328 You're an asshole.
>>681414 no u
>>681112 >>681127 >>681174 >>681207 >>681328 >>681394 >>681467 can u not
have the TK user realise that his life is a lie because his only mission was to destroy the bad guy tim, but in reality tim is pretty cool (the TK user gives his life to partially restore tims health)
Happy New Year! Drop The Apple On Tim's Face. Then release the anti-zombies. Then release the zombies. Run.
Wait, can someone explain this to me. Why are we trying to kill Tim again. I thought we were just kicking his butt, we're done here.
Summon a small piece of paper with the word "Truce?" on it, with a 'yes' and 'no' checkbox below the word. Also, a pencil.
This quest seems pretty dead, why are people still suggesting?
Cause Kome. The advocate is also partly to blame. Shame really, the quest was almost done one way or the other.