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File 132185436970.jpg - (94.75KB , 720x576 , frame1.jpg )
366944 No. 366944 ID: 6a5a08

Race:
>Humenkind
Humenoid race boasting great versatility and the title of First Civilized Species, which was presented to them by the Grand Humen Council.
Bonuses: May allocate 2 Attribute Points at game start instead of 1.

>Slimes
Amorphous creatures which once plagued adventurers on the road by providing easy EXP grinding. Recently have begun integrating into Humen society with mixed results. Naturally attuned to magic.
Bonuses: +1 to Agility, +1 to Channeling
Penalties: -1 to Strength

>Squarefolk
Small creatures that live among Humens. Secretive and stubborn, they are harder to kill than cockroaches.
Bonuses: +1 to Resilience

Gender:
>Male
+1 Resilience
>Female
+1 Smarts

Background:
>Merchant
Your mother ran off with a Squarefolk Bard to traipse across the land. Both were eaten by Bobcats. Your father has recently passed away due to an illness, leaving you his shop.

>Adventurer
You come from a long line of adventurers, and travel the land seeking fame and fortune. Mostly fortune. You have joined an expedition into treacherous lands to find an ancient artifact.

>Homeless Wretch
You have no home and no possessions to your name except for your trusty Loincloth, but have recently been drafted into the military along with the rest of the beggars in the city. This could be your big break!

Attributes:
>Strength
Your ability to lift things. Or hit them until they stop moving.
>Resilience
Your ability not to die a horrible death by being hit until you stop moving.
>Channeling
Your connection to the magical energies around you.
>Smarts
Your ability to form coherent thought, stay cool under pressure, and outwit the competition.
>Agility
Your ability to run, jump, and climb.
>Charisma
Your ability to persuade and charm people.

You may allocate 1 Skill Point at Level 1, or 2 if you are a Humen.
129 posts omitted. Last 50 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 370459 ID: a30b71

Not asking! Demanding! Unless you're the responsible for Yorik, the poor skull next to that protrusion from the wall! In which case you should be brought to authorities for further explanations!
>>
No. 370722 ID: 6a5a08
File 132338755766.jpg - (57.45KB , 720x720 , frame32.jpg )
370722

>>370451
Telling the hippie you want to do some Feng Shui and get positive energy flowing through the skull, you seem to have him for a moment, but you aren't the most Charismatic adventureress.

>>370459
You demand once again that he give you Yorick, the skull near the protrusion. He goes and picks it up and asks if that's what you mean, slime lady? The Hippie tells you that's a totally un-rad idea. He's got to get the skull back up into this here vault, ya know? He's got no idea how it gone and walked out.
>>
No. 370726 ID: b6edd6

Say: "Oh, its your sinister magic skull? Keeping it contained sounds good and all, but it seems to have somehow escaped from there once already."
>>
No. 370804 ID: 616fe9

>He's got no idea how it gone and walked out.
Summon Wooden Crate.

Why do you have a human skull inside a wooden crate inside a vault inside a cave with traps, dead albino warchicken impaled with enormous stone sword, hidden stone door and engraved altar with pressure plate?
>>
No. 370887 ID: 6a5a08
File 132344039417.jpg - (54.14KB , 720x720 , frame33.jpg )
370887

>>370726
Well that's a pretty rockin' point you have, the Hippie agrees. Might be time for some moving to be done, if this here vault ain't safe no more, ya dig?

>>370804
Summon Wooden Crate. He never even figured anybody would up and summon the crate, so he done and didn't put any blockerators for it.
See, this here skull is the skull of Archnecromancer Ben.

Charley lowers his sword and asks what the heck the Hippie is talking about.
You recall with your Smarts that Ben was head of the Necromancer Guild. It was all completely legal, at least until they tried to take over the world. He was supposedly thrown into a volcano.

My apologies for sporadic crappy updates, schedule's out of whack. Also I'm a terrible procrastinator.
>>
No. 370889 ID: a1d7ad

>>370887
The skull used to belong to a powerful necromancer? Maybe it still got some power left in it, we need to acquire it... later.

Ask why it's so important it stays in the vault and what else is in there.
>>
No. 370938 ID: 6a5a08
File 132347435927.jpg - (53.88KB , 720x720 , frame34.jpg )
370938

>>370889
You buy time while you plot.
The Hippie says there's nothing else up in here, lady dude. Nobody knows if the guy was Lichin' it up, but they don't want no chances, so they keep the bones separate, you dig? Order of the King of Humenland.

Charley whispers whole the Hippie's back is turned that he's going to need this story checked. He's not sure if it would be wise of one of the two of you to stay behind with this guy, but he shouldn't be left alone with the skull either. He wonders what you think would be best.

Midnight passes, your Mana Spheres are full.
>>
No. 370939 ID: b6edd6

Convince him to travel with you so you can find a better place to put the skull, where it won't escape from.
>>
No. 370968 ID: a1d7ad

>>370939
This is an excellent plan, it should give us time to figure out if we can tap into the skulls power without worrying about someone else stealing it.
>>
No. 371008 ID: 616fe9

>He wonders what you think would be best.
Summon Wooden Crate.
>>
No. 371091 ID: 6a5a08
File 132353201483.jpg - (51.91KB , 720x720 , frame35.jpg )
371091

>>370968
>>370939
You suggest that the Hippie go along with the two of you to find a safer spot. He just shrugs it off and says this is a rad place to put it, cause all the wards done got made already. No crates this time's all, you dig?
Sides, it's not like any Necromancer's gonna come lookin' up in a tree. Unless you're a Necromancer, dudelady?
Charley comments that a Necromancer wouldn't report the skull to the town guard.
Hippie says that's a sweet point, he was just makin' sure.

>>371008
You suggest Summon Wooden Crate. Charley leans in closer and asks what the heck you're planning to use that for.
>>
No. 372271 ID: 616fe9

We could do the sensible thing and seek a way out.

However, after he opens the vault, I really want to see a wooden crate on a collision course with the head of this smartass! Wait! Make it two wooden crates!
>>
No. 373548 ID: 6a5a08
File 132431674782.jpg - (52.77KB , 720x720 , frame35.jpg )
373548

>>372271
After what feels like a month the Hippie finally opens the door, and you promptly summon not one, but two wooden crates over his treehugging face.

The Hippie deflects the first crate with Force Push, but doesn't see the one behind it until it is too late. Totally not cool dude (you disagree, it was totally cool).
>>
No. 373549 ID: 6a5a08
File 132431684112.jpg - (45.68KB , 720x720 , frame36.jpg )
373549

There are two crashing sounds, and Charley has been knocked Unconscious by a Flying Wooden Crate.
It is Dark.
>>
No. 373550 ID: 453e62

luckily he has a helmet and a good number of hearts.

go crawl into the hippies lung's to finish them off.
>>
No. 373575 ID: 616fe9

Examine Charley. He has a potion? Anything that might help him to wake. Restraint devices? Thanks to your ridiculous strength you can not use a rope to hold the Hippie, but I think that using handcuffs are within your capabilities.

Examine Hippie. Yorick? You do not leave anyone behind. Potion? Maybe something really smelly to wake Charley. Key to the vault? You do not want to go there just to be locked inside it. Something of value? You can not help, you are poor and he is a jerk.

Examine vault. Go nuts if you woke Charley, took the key to the vault AND immobilized the Hippie.

Otherwise, just take the key, look for something to wake Charley, rescue Yorick, throw the Hippie inside the vault and close it. Necessarily in that order, if possible. Get out of there as quickly as possible.
>>
No. 373592 ID: e3aff6

>>373550
We shouldn't kill the guy over a random skull.
>>
No. 373810 ID: 6a5a08
File 132443546615.jpg - (48.33KB , 720x720 , frame37.jpg )
373810

>>373575
You examine Charley. There don't seem to be any Potions on him, but you find a Shortsword, a pair of Manacles, and a Ball of String, standard equipment for a Town Guard.

You get the Manacles, which is really all the weight you can carry at a time (who the heck made metal so heavy?) and go over to the Hippie, who is thoroughly unconscious. Probably with a concussion or minor brain damage. You slap the cuffs on 'im and loot his not-corpse. The Hippie is carrying a Mana Potion, some Hallucinogenic Drugs, and a Fake Beard. Ben Yorick lies on the cold, unforgiving stone of the top step. Alas, there is no key to Ben Yorick's Vault. You're pretty sure the Hippie opened it with Magic.
>>
No. 373872 ID: 365adf

Equip FAKE BEARD.

Mix MANA POTION with HALLUCINOGENIC DRUGS and CONSUME.

Go on an ACIDSLIME-TRIP.
>>
No. 373883 ID: 616fe9

Wake up Charley. Enter the vault together, while Charley carries the Hippie.
>>
No. 374388 ID: 6a5a08
File 132459863277.jpg - (70.07KB , 720x720 , frame38.jpg )
374388

>>373883
Unfortunately, you lack anything to wake Charley with.

>>373872
You also lack a solid form to strap the Fake Beard to, so you just hold it on with some Slime. It weighs pretty much nothing.
You pick up the Hallucinogenic Drugs and pour them into the Mana Potion, causing a small puff of smoke. You gaze into the Bottle of Swirling Light, and are apprehensive about consuming it. On the other hand, the more of the Mana-Filled Fumes you inhale, the less fucks you give.
>>
No. 374389 ID: 6a5a08
File 132459869817.jpg - (157.62KB , 720x720 , frame40.jpg )
374389

You absorb the liquid in the bottle and drift away into a land of colors.

Level Up:
Select an Attribute to raise:
>Strength: Increases your carrying capacity and melee damage.
>Resilience: Adds another Vitality Heart.
>Channeling: Adds another Mana Sphere; You learn a new spell.
>Smarts: Increases your understand how things work, and makes you better at Research and Analysis.
>Agility: You move quicker, act faster, and roll with the punches better.
>Charisma: People like you more and are more likely to listen to or help you.
>Slime Acid Upgrade: You can use ranged Slime Acid an additional time per day, and gain an Acid-based melee attack usable at will.
>>
No. 374409 ID: a1d7ad

Channeling, we need more magic
>>
No. 374412 ID: 453e62

more smarts.
>>
No. 374425 ID: 3947e9

Smarts first choice.
Chanelling second.
>>
No. 374470 ID: f208e4

Strength! Your lack of power has given us too many problems! Maybe you can even maintain a more solid form!
>>
No. 374476 ID: 6a5a08
File 132461848636.jpg - (84.15KB , 720x576 , frame1B.jpg )
374476

You rise the ranks to Level 2, and your Smarts is now 4.
You are also presently incapacitated by heavy drug use.

>Please Create a Character (see first post for any forgotten details)
>>
No. 374479 ID: 9c7c3b

>>366946
>>
No. 374494 ID: f208e4

>>366946
Another vote for Merchant SquareMan.
>>
No. 374496 ID: 6a5a08
File 132462417459.jpg - (66.00KB , 720x720 , frame41.jpg )
374496

You are a Squarefolk Merchant. Your father Mikon has recently passed away, leaving you with a Shop and Lots of Gambling Debt. Everything was taken from the shop to pay the debt, and you are left with naught but your trusty Loincloth. And it's all because of your mother, that Filthy Stinking Whore. It fills you with Burning Hatred for the Female Sex.
Stats:
Vitality Hearts: 4 | Mana Spheres: 1
Strength: 1 | Resilience: 4
Channeling: 0 | Smarts: 1
Agility: 1 | Charisma: 1
Carrying Capacity: 2 Items plus equipped items [can carry 'weightless' items (eg. maps, notes) up to logical limit]
Items:
>Loincloth
Spells:
>Squarefolk Regen (1/day can spontaneously heal 1/2 heart, but becomes hungry)
Traits:
>Basic Literacy: Able to read and write basic concepts, eg. name, money value, and simple words. (Background)
>Masculine Bravado: +1 Resilience
>Squarefolk Resilience: +1 Resilience

Is this Character okay?
>Y/N
If Y, please Name Character
>>
No. 374499 ID: a1d7ad

>>374496
Y
Quad von Profit
>>
No. 374506 ID: 6a5a08
File 132462547633.jpg - (65.35KB , 720x720 , frame42.jpg )
374506

You, Quad von Profit, hear a commotion outside. In the mix of general panic you pick out the words 'oh god the blood' and some uncouth slang terms.
It doesn't help this depressingly blank room and your depressingly blank life and your depressingly blank rage. But it does distract you momentarily.
>>
No. 374524 ID: de7eea

>>374506
Clearly we need a better class of rage. We should check outside to see if we might acquire some there.
>>
No. 374537 ID: f208e4

RAGE? RAGE!? YOU DO NOT KNOW RAGE, SQUARE ASS! NOT WITH THIS PATHETIC EXPRESSION! GO OUT AND GLARE AT THE WHORE WHO DARE TO DISTRACT YOU FROM YOUR RAGE!
>>
No. 375962 ID: 6a5a08
File 132517167045.jpg - (92.98KB , 720x720 , frame43.jpg )
375962

>>374524
>>374537
You attempt to focus your Rage and step outside. You see the body of a woman- no doubt a Filthy Whore- lying upon the ground. She is dead.
There is a Rampaging Crossdresser locked in combat with a Town Guard. The Guard seems to be in trouble.
>>
No. 375963 ID: 365adf

Assist RAMPAGING CROSSDRESSER for lulz and (actual) profit.
>>
No. 375964 ID: 453e62

attack the slut! use that massive HP reserve to take a hit for the guard so he can land a killing blow.
>>
No. 375994 ID: a1d7ad

If this RAMPAGING CROSSDRESSER want to dress like a FILTHY WHORE, then we will treat him like one, aid the guard.
>>
No. 375996 ID: 784dcc

Find out what's up, then aid the rampaging crossdresser.
>>
No. 376003 ID: 44e06a

SWORDS? SWORDS! THESE WEAKLINGS ARE A DISGRACE TO MANHOOD! SHOW THEM THE BITTER FLAVOR AND FIERY PASSION OF THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE AND GENTLEMANLY WAY OF BATTLE: GOOD OLD FISTCUFFS!
>>
No. 376814 ID: 6a5a08
File 132545496918.jpg - (63.43KB , 720x720 , frame44.jpg )
376814

>>375996
>>375963
You contemplate taking out your rage on the world along with the Rampaging Crossdresser, and move to assist.
>>375994
>>375964
But then you realize he is dressed like a Flithy Whore and should be treated as such. That is to say, Burned at the Stake.
>>376003
You are Confused, Angry, Hungry, and you want to punch the shit out of something.
>>
No. 376815 ID: 6a5a08
File 132545503751.jpg - (97.18KB , 720x720 , frame45.jpg )
376815

You punch a Whore. Stop staring into space, you Dead Whore. Space is too good for you.

The Guard begs for his life.
>>
No. 376816 ID: 453e62

uses guard's sword on cross dresser.
>>
No. 376826 ID: a1d7ad

>>376816
This is the best course of action, the cross dresser must be slain
>>
No. 376843 ID: c2c011

>>376815
Use guards sword to violently sodomise filthy whore cross dresser!
>>
No. 376860 ID: cc6f80

THE ONLY GOOD WHORE IS A DEAD WHORE! STOP PUNCHING THIS FINE MODEL OF ELEGANCE! PUNCH THE RAMPAGING CROSSDRESSER FOR BEING A WHORE! PUNCH THE GUARD FOR BEGGING HIS LIFE TO A WHORE!
>>
No. 376867 ID: cf49fc

>>376860
DO THIS. THEN TAKE THE GUARD'S SWORD AND GUT THEM.
Do we really need ANOTHER Frank Miller Quest?
>>
No. 377154 ID: 6a5a08
File 132561207039.jpg - (98.89KB , 720x720 , frame46.jpg )
377154

You cease the punching of the Dead Whore and Get Guard's Sword. It's probably a Scimitar or Ratatouille or something. You aren't good with sword names and shit.

Resisting the urge to PUNCH. EVERYTHING., you make use of your Element of Surprise to go shank this Wannabe Whore right where his Heart might be. You aren't good at astronomy either. Not like he has one though, cause he's a Filthy Heartless Wannabe Whore!

Sneak Attack Critical Hit! The Rampaging Crossdresser Wannabe Whore is successfully penetrated by your Girthful Blade. Town Guard shakily attempts to get up and stop the bleeding, but looks about to Faint. You suspect only his Manly Bravado keeps him from collapsing.
>>
No. 377156 ID: ed57e8

be proud of him being manly, but slap him once for showing weakness to a wannabee whore.
>>
No. 377160 ID: c2c011

>>377154
Keep stabbing the whore, shout "TAKE IT! TAKE IT! TAKE IT YOU FILTHY WHORE!!!" while stabbing. Then casually greet the guardsman once you have stabbed the whore about 50 times.
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