YOUR GRAVE!

>>120683
Gold rings, obviously.

?????? 2010/01/28(Thu)23:36 No. 120688 ID: d75539
File 126475059211.jpg - (89.75KB , 512x512 , 036.jpg )

"Worms. Going to do some nighttime fishing."

"Fishin' eh? Wouldn't mind a bit of that myself, pity I'm on duty, else I'd join you."

>>120685
Mine is an evil laugh!

?????? 2010/01/28(Thu)23:40 No. 120700 ID: d75539
File 126475080077.jpg - (79.85KB , 512x512 , 037.jpg )

"Take care citizen, the forest road can be dangerous at night. I wish you luck with your fishing!"

"Thank you, good luck with finding that runaway sir."

Celeyilo: Jump out of hiding!

?????? 2010/01/28(Thu)23:44 No. 120706 ID: d75539
File 126475105367.jpg - (64.26KB , 512x512 , 038.jpg )

"....."

Celeyilo 2010/01/28(Thu)23:45 No. 120707 ID: d75539
File 126475110371.jpg - (70.23KB , 512x512 , 039.jpg )

"..Is he gone?"

"D-Don't just peek out like that!"

>>120707

Offer to stay under there longer if that's what she wants.

>ASK YOUTH about SOLDIERS

Or uh... the opposite. Just which one are you!?

>>120707
So... what ARE you digging for?

>>120724
cathole, obviously.

>>120733

BUNNY hole.

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)00:04 No. 120737 ID: d75539
File 126475227270.jpg - (79.87KB , 512x512 , 040.jpg )

"What, ya want me to stay under there? It is kinda nice and warm between your thighs~"

"Shut up. I already got a nice grave dug for you, don't push it."

"Anyway, did ya find it? I heard a good solid clunk before the guard showed up,"

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)00:05 No. 120739 ID: d75539
File 126475235113.jpg - (41.60KB , 512x512 , 041.jpg )

>>120724

What, ya forget already?

BREWBEARD'S SUPPLIES STASH found!!

>BREWBEARD
>BREW

Beer?

>>120740
(This is a continuation)
You didn't miss too much, in terms of story, just that they broke out of a bordello. Brewbeard is a dwarf who the elf kid respected as a father. What with him being the only male around and all.

>>120739
Open it already.

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)00:35 No. 120743 ID: d75539
File 126475413963.jpg - (84.55KB , 512x512 , 042.jpg )

Hotaru hefts the chest out of the hole, it remains quite clean of dirt, despite how long it must've been buried.

"For a weapons stash, it's kinda light.."

Hmph.. just because she needed to trade in her mallet for the shovel.. Now then.. what to do?

>get further away from the town, taking BREWBEARD'S SUPPLIES STASH into the forest before opening
>Open BREWBEARD'S SUPPLIES STASH here and now, near the guard's patrol route?
>Other: Specify action.

>>120743
Could be a chest of holding or something larger on the inside than on the outside.

>>120743
Get away from the patrol route. I guess it's light enough.

Drag it off the patrol path and open it.

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)00:57 No. 120750 ID: d75539
File 126475545147.jpg - (56.59KB , 512x512 , 043.jpg )

"Could be a chest of holding or something larger on the inside than on the outside."

"That's stupid, it doesn't even sound like there's anything rattling around in there"

"It's not stupid. You're stupid."

"You wanna carry the chest?!"

>>120750
"I wanna carry YOUR chest if you know what I mean."

>>120751

Heyo!

Anyways, open that sucker up.

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)01:16 No. 120755 ID: d75539
File 126475659811.jpg - (54.21KB , 512x512 , 044.jpg )

"I wanna carry your chest, if you know what I mean."

"Oh shut up!!"

We find a nice secluded clearing in the forest, and crack that sucker open.

"..Motherfucker! Empty! I knew it!! I'm gonna get shackled up and turned into some mindless sex machine no thanks to you!"

"Shaddap! It's not empty! There's a note inside!"

A bloodstained note for that matter..

>If this is a thief, rogue, brigand, bandit hoodlum (or just a plain old treasure hunter, my apologies if this is the case, but,) I hope you die as painlessly as possible.

>If this is Celeyilo, I hope you live!

>Brewbeard.

..Whuh?

>>120755
OH GOD IT'S A MIMIC OR SOMETHING START PANICKING OR RUNNING OR SOMETHING

>>120755
RUN AWAY!

Celeyilo 2010/01/29(Fri)01:21 No. 120762 ID: d75539
File 126475691710.jpg - (58.09KB , 512x512 , 045.jpg )

>>120758
>>120759

What the hell's a mimi-

"Oh."

"Shit."

>>120762

FLEE!

>>120762
NO MIMICS AREN'T TOUGH FUCK HIS SHIT UP

Depends what game you're playing, Mimics can be quite troublesome. But not if you step on their tops and keep the jaws closed! FLANKING MANOUVER

Anyone care to link any other threads of this, I can't find it in the archives.

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)05:45 No. 123732 ID: d75539
File 126511835962.jpg - (95.15KB , 512x512 , 047.jpg )

>>120766

YOU'RE YOGDAMN RIGHT THEY AREN'T!

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)05:47 No. 123734 ID: d75539
File 126511843238.jpg - (55.41KB , 512x512 , 049.jpg )

SON OF AN ELF COURTESAN! MY BLOODY EYE!

Step back and fix your eye. FIX IT I SAY!

Maybe now you'll get a badass scar?

>>123734
Run around screaming and panicking!

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)06:16 No. 123742 ID: d75539
File 126512020553.jpg - (87.42KB , 512x512 , 050.jpg )

Shaddap! I know dammit! I'd prefer the use of my eye than a damn scar!

Man, that thing looks pissed.

>Attack
>Magic
>Flee
>????? (Rage meter: 75%)

>>123742
Increase RAGE METER by complimenting bunny girl on her well exposed underwear.

>>123742
What magic do you have?

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)07:26 No. 123746 ID: d75539
File 126512440264.jpg - (47.63KB , 512x512 , 051.jpg )

>>123744

I'd love to, but this isn't the time for that kinda shit!

>(Rage rises regardless by 5% at the poorly advised idea of teasing Hotaru in the middle of a fight with something with BIG TEETH)

>>123745

The sort I doubt'd be good against something made outta wood and metal! Throwing around splinters of ice won't do any good right now!

>(Rage rises 10% at the thought of how useless his magic is right now)

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)07:27 No. 123747 ID: d75539
File 126512445061.jpg - (55.78KB , 512x512 , 052.jpg )

The MIMIC attacks Hotaru!

Hotaru COUNTERS!!

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)07:29 No. 123749 ID: d75539
File 126512454084.jpg - (70.48KB , 512x512 , 053.jpg )

If a box can hurt, that HAD to!

>Attack
>Magic
>Flee
>????? (Rage meter: 90%)

Indeed, swing it like a halberd.

>>123749
Yeah, way to go and actually do something useful.
Oh wait.
What kind of pansy bitch of an elf are you?
LET ME SEE YOU GRIT THOSE TEETH.

Flail your arms about wildly, screaming at the top of your lungs

>>123749
Think about the old bitch who managed to keep you down for years, who you have just now managed to flee from in hopes of finding some weapons so you can stop being a pansy-ass elf and maybe rise a few hundred ticks on the Manly scale; only to get cockblocked by this fucking Mimic. Infuriating as fuck, right?

Now picture the old bitch's face on the Mimic. Give yourself a nice, good target.

>>123749
Stab that fucker!

I still suggest abandoning the whole turn-based bit... circle around so you've got it surrounded on both sides, and whoever's behind it hold the top shut so it can't attack while the other one repeatedly kicks it into submission.

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)08:56 No. 123764 ID: d75539
File 12651297969.jpg - (68.18KB , 512x512 , 054.jpg )

>>123752
>>123753
>>123754
>>123755

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

"HOTARU, KICK THAT FUCKING THING'S LID OFF!!"

*CUTSCENE*

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)08:57 No. 123769 ID: d75539
File 126512987890.jpg - (111.94KB , 512x512 , 056.jpg )

*CC-CRAAAACK*

"What the f-"

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)08:58 No. 123770 ID: d75539
File 126512990876.jpg - (49.45KB , 512x512 , 057.jpg )

"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-"

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)08:59 No. 123772 ID: d75539
File 126512994443.jpg - (69.28KB , 512x512 , 058.jpg )

"-FFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)09:00 No. 123773 ID: d75539
File 126513001624.jpg - (55.15KB , 512x512 , 059.jpg )

*SECRET TECHNIQUE*

Celeyilo 2010/02/02(Tue)09:00 No. 123774 ID: d75539
File 126513005729.jpg - (86.16KB , 512x512 , 060.jpg )

*STRIKE THE EARTH!!*

>>123774

Hey man that mimic had a wife and children to support.

>>123774

...loot it anyhow.

>>123774
Loot Mimic.

Don't loot mimic

>>123788
Loot the shit out of that mimic. And give yourself a slap on the back for being way more badass than elfs. Although that whole aerial attack thing is kinda elven.

Celeyilo 2010/04/25(Sun)14:30 No. 169967 ID: d75539
File 127223103530.jpg - (58.72KB , 512x512 , 061.jpg )

CONTINUING FOR GOODNESS KNOWS HOW LONG

>>124997

The mimic's core melts away into shadows and dissipates, revealing it's hoarded secrets.

A steel pickaxe, you recognize as BREWBEARD'S BARREL BREACHER

A dagger of an odd, blue metal that's cold to the touch. BREWBEARD'S DRINK STIRRER

A wallet, containing 500 GOLD, adding to your depleted currency reserves for a total of 750 GOLD

A box of meat and bread rations.

A USELESS MAP at a glance. You don't really recognize it..

Celeyilo 2010/04/25(Sun)14:32 No. 169968 ID: d75539
File 127223114826.jpg - (17.18KB , 512x512 , 062.jpg )

You've set up camp together, and started a fire with the mimic's remains, the smashed chest was useless for any more than kindling.

Hotaru's gone off to a midnight dip in the stream, leaving you staring idly into the campfire. Your eye still stings too much to open it. You can only hope it wasn't damaged.

>>169968

Creep towards the stream to get a gander at some rabbit ass.

>>169968
Eat meat and braed. Train some with the pickaxe to build up some manly muscles.

And for the love of god don't think about peeking at the scary bunny girl. She would beat you so damn hard if you did.

>>169968

Peek on the bunny girl. If you're caught, say you were just checking up on her, since she'd been away awhile.

>>169972
Second.

Yeah let's not go snooping on the amazonian bunny lady. Eat and build muscle, ya scrawny whelp.

>>169968
cold can help with pain. wrap the dagger in bandage and place the flat of it over your eye.. if it feels too cold, add more bandage. Naturally, don't press hard; it might activate some kind of damaging power.

>>169987
I second this, I mean its not peeking you need to make sure she's alright...its what a gentlemen would do.

>>169987
Do it, but be careful. She's a Kick Master, after all.

Celeyilo 2010/04/25(Sun)16:39 No. 170024 ID: d75539
File 12722387583.jpg - (11.59KB , 512x512 , 063.jpg )

>>169972
>>170008

You know, those are both very good things I should be taking into consideration. She's certainly much bigger and stronger than me.. If I were caught, I would certainly be beaten to a pulp..

Celeyilo 2010/04/25(Sun)16:40 No. 170027 ID: d75539
File 127223885959.jpg - (17.87KB , 512x512 , 064.jpg )

Oh dear, however did I wind up in these bushes with a perfect view of her bathing?

Hmm.. looks like she can that fur on her chest and butt goes away when she wants..

>>170027
Get your head down.

>>170027

Mission accomplished, now beat a stealthy retreat!

Unless you want to be a pud and steal her clothes or commit some other juvenile prank.

>>170027
Quite intriguing.

Do tread lightly.

>>170030
Don't steal her things.
She WILL kill you.

>>170030
No that's not what a gentlemen would do he would stay and make sure no one will attempt to take advantage of her in this vulnerable state.

>>170036

He's peeking on a naked lady, he's not a gentleman.

>>170037
No he is making sure her bathing goes uninterrupted by any ill mannered folk. The fact he is seeing her naked is only a side effect of him doing a gentlemanly deed. I'm sure if there was any trouble he would rush to her rescue.

>>170027
come on man i know what you are thinking

just do it already
whip it out and get to work
she won't catch you

>>170036
Vulnerable? She's some kinda martial artist. Naked she's just unrestricted.

To our brave hero, I suggest practicing Dwarf-stealth. Remain still as stone, until you're merely a part of the scenery. Even if she looks right at you, you MUST NOT MOVE. Even if she speaks to you, you MUST NOT MOVE. Only move when she's certain enough of your presence that she's going to try and kick your skull out from between your ears.

>>170027
Head back to camp.
Strip naked.
Get in sleeping bag.
'Accidentally open the flap in your sleep'.
Pretend to sleep.

Celeyilo 2010/04/25(Sun)18:02 No. 170057 ID: d75539
File 127224376982.jpg - (111.31KB , 512x512 , 065.jpg )

I think you might be right. Considering I don't think that bear over there is in any way conscious, I'm not sure she'd need my protection..

Her only article of clothing, her cloak, is hung on a branch on the far side of the stream.

>>170057
It doesn't matter whether or not she needs it. Its the right thing to do. A gentlemen must always take care of a lady. However if you are confident in her abilities may as well leave. Also don't steal her clothing that is not a gentlemen thing to do.

>>170057
Wait, she doesn't have anything under her cloak?
Your face was right up in her ladyparts the whole time that guard was talking to her?

why did you not take advantage of this

>>170060
Either she or the guard would've killed him.

Go to camp.
Get pickaxe.
Enter clearing where bunny girl is.
"Hey, you used to have a mallet (I believe it was said somewhere here...), so I think this would be- whoa!"
Appear startled at her nakedness.
Leave pickaxe then turn around and return to camp.
This will establish you as a gentleman, bringing a lady a present,

... She'll never suspect I am plotting her doom. Muahahahaha!

>>170057
Better not chance it. Also, you've surely gotten an eyeful. Better leave while you still remain conscious.

Man that bear could not only provide you with some awesome clothing, but some awesome bear sandwiches for latter.

>>170083
This is so true, on so many levels.

yeah, let's head back. this is a big enough risk as it is, if she catches you.... you are dead.

>>170060
>>123769

I can clearly see a pair of undies there.

>>170135

Elf-face whose name is too complicated to say said it was fur and that it appears to be gone now. Possibly it is fur underwear from a skinned bear of course... oh God, how many poor innocent bears have fallen victim to her? Is that a bearskin cloak?

OH GOD!

>>170057
Your friend is clearly a superhuman beast.

If she does catch you, look stunned at her.

Claim you'd heard the bear, and were shocked at how easily she'd dispatched it.

>>170057
Hey trees-for-brains, you know those ears aren't just for show, right?
Rabbits have got, like, fucking super-hearing. She already knows you're there.

You. Are. Fucked.
...Unless she takes your attempts to sneak a glance at her funbags as a compliment, that is.

considering how big them ears are she probably knows you're there

>>170057
Get out of there Stalker! You have a way less thick skull than a bear, she might fuck you up in so many different ways. Now get back to camp and train with using a manly weapon in a manly way. So start swinging that pickaxe.

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)00:32 No. 170337 ID: d75539
File 127226716894.jpg - (90.64KB , 512x512 , 066.jpg )

Yeah yeah, I'm headed back to camp.

Damn, I'm surprised she didn't work as one of the 'serving girls' at the brothel though, instead of just the bouncer.

You can distantly hear her muttering something about the "stupid moon" and soon after, a distinct cracking noise as you turn. It wasn't from any thing you stepped on, must've been her.

Oh well, if she knows I'm here, which I still doubt, she'd have kicked my ass for spying already. For once, I'm actually happy to be an elf with all this damn silent forest moving crap.. Then again, I did have to grow up learning how to get around quietly anyway..

>>170337
Do you like to eat bear?

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)00:35 No. 170340 ID: d75539
File 127226730261.jpg - (86.21KB , 512x512 , 067.jpg )

Back at camp, you retrieve BREWBEARD'S BARREL BREACHER, and spend a few moments contemplating a good excuse to make up when you step back in on her bathing.

You can hear a lot of noise, foliage and undergrowth bending and cracking approaching the camp.. you might've missed your chance..

>>170337
Well the Garrelf moon is out in all it's glory. That might influence things to be a bit more perverted, or alot. It's Garrelf we're talking about after all. Hey who knows, if you're lucky you might be one of his descendants.

But now back to camp and train like a motherfucker. Swing that damn pickaxe around until it feels like your arms are going to fall off, then swing it some more.

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)00:36 No. 170342 ID: d75539
File 127226737462.jpg - (105.51KB , 512x512 , 068.jpg )

Hotaru arrives. A BEAR is slung over one shoulder.

"Oy, go butcher this damn thing while I dry off, it wasn't letting me wash up in peace."

>>170342

Flatter her and do as she asks.

>>170342
See, aren't you happy she didn't catch you?

Start skinning it with your new dagger. Eat its heart and liver raw to gain its power.

the liver is a recommendation but the heart is a must.

>>170346
Then fashion its claws into clawed gauntlets.

and maybe turn it's head into a nice hat.

>>170342
Oh good, food. You're going to need a bigger fire to smoke it. Throw some wood on, then get to work cleaning it.

"word, its dead right? I'm not a big fan of surprise maulings"

>>170455
don't say that. revealing weakness is stupid. sfter she leaves and you want to make sure it's dead then jam that pickax into it's brain.

>>170355
Well of course he is turning the skin into a cloak. As everyone knows a manly man needs a bear skin cloak with the head as a hat.

Tell her how amazingly amazing she is, then use the dagger to do what they said. As in eat heart and liver, skin to make cloak, claws for gauntlets, head for cowl, then cook the rest.

Ask her to go and get some wood for the fire after she finishes drying off to cook it while you prepare the meat.

>>170487
that reminds me. probably the fastest way to show a dwarf that you aren't like other sissy elves is to cut down a tree.

>>170342

Some sort of lycanthope, eh?

>>170342
You have the perfect ingredients for a berserker outfit now.

Or rather, She does, since it's her kill..

It sort of detracts from the Manly Essence of it all if you were to wear ferocious bear-armor knowing it was your Babysitter that took the thing down.

>>170501
oh yeah... you need to offer her the bear ha, and if she declines to wear it then you can wear it without worrying.

Make a hat from the head!

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)15:59 No. 170551 ID: d75539
File 127232276196.jpg - (76.95KB , 512x512 , 069.jpg )

"It's dead right? I'm not a fan of surprise maulings."

"Not it's not dead, it has a concussion. Just stick the pick axe-"

"BREWBEARD'S BARRE-"

"Stick the PICKAXE into it's NECK or something before it wakes up!"

You do so. Surprisingly less blood than you th-

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)16:00 No. 170553 ID: d75539
File 127232284852.jpg - (100.23KB , 512x512 , 070.jpg )

OH GODS SO MUCH BLOOD WHY IS THERE SO MUCH BLOOD IT'S SPRAYING ALL OVER ME AAAAAAAAUGH.

Bears slaughtered in their sleep: 1/349

>>170553
Butcher it, then sit down next to your companion and ask her what's wrong.

>>170553
It's a fucking huge bear and you just cut off one of it's main arteries. It's going to bleed like a motherfucker. Now get started on the whole skining and feasting on it's organs buisness. That's how you quickly score up badass and manliness points.

Remember eat heart and liver, skin to make cloak, claws for gauntlets, head for cowl, then cook the rest.

Offer her the skin first though. It's techincally her kill so she should get the skin spoils. Heart and liver are yours though.

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)16:09 No. 170559 ID: d75539
File 127232339392.jpg - (112.27KB , 512x512 , 071.jpg )

"...Can I go wash up?"

"No, get back there and finish what you started."

"I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. I don't know how to butcher that thing properly."

Celeyilo has become a DABBLING BUTCHER nonetheless.

In addition to this, you feel just a little sick to your stomach. Understandable, you've never had to slaughter an animal before. You're covered with blood, and if you don't soon do something, you'll probably never be able to wash it out of your clothes.

>>170559
Go wash your clothes, then leave them hanging up to dry.
Butcher the bear naked.

>>170559
You should be able to find the heart and liver atleast. And get off most of the skin. Eat the heart and the liver, raw, no pussy elf shit here. Then cook some of the meat, try to dry or smoke the rest and scrape off the meat from the skin.

"Seriously I think this is gonna stain, and that won't help with any negotiations."

>>170566
Who is this person you're with, anyway? Longtime friend? Love interest? Mercenary? What?
Why is she helping you?

>>170570
Read the previous chapter and that information among other things will be reveald. She was the bouncer at the brothel where he grew up.

>>170559
Finish your work think of how awesome a pair of bear claw gauntlets would be or how soft a bear skin blanket would be or how tasty some bear burgers would be.

>>170572
There's a previous chapter? Since this quest doesn't seem to have a name, can I get a link to it?

Elf quest

>>170579
Here ya go.
http://tgchan.org/kusaba/questarch/res/35945.html

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)18:28 No. 170602 ID: d75539
File 127233172321.jpg - (76.85KB , 512x512 , 072.jpg )

You manage to get Hotaru to supervise you in butchering the beast 'properly' as opposed to helping you outright ("I already had one bath tonight, and the water was freezing.") Some of the butchery was indeed nausiating, hopefully you can get used to it if you need do it again, and even manage to skin it.

Leaving the choice meats, like the liver and heart to roast (Brewbeard was a civilized dwarf, not a desperate savage feasting on vermin!) You take the time to wash up, weighing your bloodied clothing under a rock and hoping the gentle current can wash some of the blood away.

The cold doesn't really bother you. Being born in winter after all left you a natural resistance to any form of chill. What was freezing to Hotaru is merely refreshingly cool to you.

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)18:31 No. 170603 ID: d75539
File 127233188758.jpg - (87.81KB , 512x512 , 073.jpg )

You're broken out of your mulling over of useless redundant crap you already know where you hear someone nearby.

"There you are.. come here you stupid thing.."

Celeyilo 2010/04/26(Mon)18:34 No. 170604 ID: d75539
File 127233205518.jpg - (48.57KB , 512x512 , 074.jpg )

"Sure, it was kind of nice raising you little things at first, but they always tease me now because of you.."

The goblin tries to imitate a higher pitched, hyperactive voice, "Oh look, there's Nako the lonely cat lady~ She's so old and still a virrrgin~"

"..Stupid Atu."

>>170604
"Hello there miss."

Make no attempt to cover yourself.

"Well, if that's a problem, I could help you."

>>170604
"You're not old, and there's an easy fix for that~"

"I didn't know they built D-cup goblins."

>>170606
Second.

"oh my, using a stray cat as an excuse to spy on me."

>>170604
You know what'd be a dorfy thing to do? Hit that. Either meaning is fine.

Scream. Scream a manly scream. In a deep voice.

Get her to sign a contract. Then tell the goblin she must now join your party to pay off the cost of seeing you naked.

I am a genius.

>>170604
You are now in more danger, physically, mentally, and socially, than you'd ever be in if you were dragged back to the brothel by the guard.

The 'old' goblins are the worst of the worst, having decades or more of practice at doing dirty deeds and surviving them. Usually by being too insane to be prepared for.

>>170658
age=/=number of deeds
she very well could not of done much of anything, just taking care of cats.

>>170604
I smell a potential party member.

Goddamn you have the most feminine figure I've ever seen in my life.

Also, Hotaru's peeping on you.

Maybe.

Also, play it cooool.

"Hi."

>>170604
Ohhh, sounds like she has problem that needs a manly elf to solve. Don't act embarrsed or cover yourself. Simply ask her if she needs some help.

And if you cook the heart and the liver they will lose their power. Sheesh, are you going to tell me now that you won't eat the raw heart of your fallen enemies to gain their streangth?

Be like the Serpents of Darkness. Consume only the hearts of the evil. That way you will gain access to the power of the Dark God!

And THEN we kill everyone.

If you have good control, you should be able to make your scrotum dance by jerking the muscles on one side of it, and then the other. Give it a try, and then put on a little show for her. Maybe sing along to it, like "Ta ta, da da, ta da, da ta, da da da, ta ta ta" you know?

>>170904
mother of god... i don't think i can unicode stare hard enough.

>>170904
This is too good.
Do it.

>>170904
...no.

>>170917

Why not?

>>170904
DEMOCRACY!

>>170787
raw liver will give you flukes.

>>170604
Keep your back to her, clench buttocks.
It probably won't help, but it might distract her.

>>170934
bend... then when she comes close enough execute scrotum dance...

Or you could just greet her and explain about your clothes...

Act like a deer struck in headlight, then do the scrutum dance when she least expects it.

Nako 2010/04/27(Tue)16:56 No. 171120 ID: d75539
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"Evening."

"Mmh?"

Nako 2010/04/27(Tue)16:58 No. 171121 ID: d75539
File 127241268498.jpg - (50.24KB , 512x512 , 076.jpg )

..Naked. Elf. Boy.

Why is there a naked elf boy over there, and why is he speaking goblin? Why is he just standing there? Why does he know goblin?

ohwowthatthingisbig,isheaboyorashortelfman?

(You are now Nako.)

>>171121
>ohwowthatthingisbig,isheaboyorashortelfman?
He's half dwarf

>>171121
... Continue to stare in awe.

>>171121
You just lamented your virginity, and a well-equipped elf who somehow knows goblin suddenly appears naked before you and offers to relieve you of that burden.
It would probably be unwise to turn him down.

>>171121

Stammer incomprehensively.

Nonchalantly begin bathing as well. Act as though this is completely normal.

Nako 2010/04/27(Tue)17:14 No. 171138 ID: d75539
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>>171122

Don't even dwarf kids have beards?

>>171124

You would, but you're a terrible prude. Odd trait for a goblin, we know.

..Still, your eye does keep wandering back to it.

>>171125

Okay, I know I was complaining, but I didn't think anyone was around.. I-I don't think I'm ready..

>>171127

You came out this far to fetch this stupid cat! (which is now currently kneading your chest. with it's claws out. Ow.) Not go splash about in freezing cold water! (You're not entirely sure how he's standing there without any clothes on, and soaking.. moonlight glinting off his bod- Aaagh! Stop that!)

...I don't know if I could take anyone looking at me naked either.. s-sure, there was that statue I carved, but that's completely different!

>>171138
your right maybe this isn't the best time, but don't you think this is an amazing plot hook. This elf is probably on a adventure he may need your help, I'm sure someone who is good at hunting and skinning cats could be useful to him, but first you must introduce yourself. So go on and say hello.

>>171138
Well engage in conversation, ask him how he knows to speak goblin and stuff. You can step out of the water and/or turn away from him during this. You don't have to, of course.

>>171138
Think about that for a minute. What kind of creature appears out of nowhere to grant your wish, and is immune to cold?
That seems like a pretty powerful being right there, and you should never change your mind when in the presence of a powerful being.
Pet your cat and set it down; it will find its own way back to the house.
After that, walk up to the elf-like-being and reverently ask him what he wants of you.

>>171138
>I-I don't think I'm ready.
It's now or never nako! Do you really want to be known as the crazy cat lady for the rest of your life!?

I could have sworn Tura said that you and her had some good ol' raping time with Mozud.

>>/questdis/317479

At least say hi. Right now you have a displeased face. Don't try to hide your interest with a front of disgust. You'll only regret it later.

>>171150
alternate time-line.

>>171154
Might be pre-raping.

>>171150
Where does this quest fit in the timeline?

>>171150
Actually everything in the 'inside the quest' in non-cannon... or at least undefined canon. At least that's what I heard.

Oh Nako, we know you aren't a prude.

I know you might find the idea of doing an elf repulsive (lord knows most of us hate elves), but this one is both well endowed, and hates the rest of elven kind.

He's almost as badass as Cacame Awemedinade. As you can see. And never unsee.

>>171138
"Um, hi. Where did you learn to speak goblin?"

>>171138
That cat looks like Doctor Meowgon. http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=003651

Name him Doctor Meowgon!

>>171155
or it could be that she wasn't penetrated Tura probably hogged him all to herself.

There is only one answer, isn't there? Follow him whereever he goes and help him. This way, when you want to jump into his sack, he is there to do so.

>>171138
Feeling bored? Tag along. Bring the cat. You'll make your decision in time.

>>171138
Well when will a chance like this come along ever again? It's not like any of the others ever have to find out. This is a pretty much golden oppurtunity.

Just tell him what you need him to do and then let it happen.

>>171138

>> You would, but you're a terrible prude. Odd trait for a goblin, we know.

Thus explaining why you're still a virgin. Oh well, we can work with that.

Be a dear and try not to think about the power hidden behind the buttocks of this diminutive elf. You know he destroyed a monster box with the force of his pelvis, alone? The only thing between you and him is that nice soft fur loincloth rubbing against your private parts. You're obviously in no danger of anything... happening.