Mneme!AACRITtEr. 2010/10/09(Sat)21:39 No. 24672 ID: fd6d7e
File 128668557720.jpg - (44.18KB , 512x384 , buu.jpg )

Defense and Speed both work well together, plus we don't exactly know who to kill and who not to kill at this point. So I'd say 1/2/2 as long as Defense and Speed don't conflict with each other. If they do though, 1/1/3 is mighty tempting. But maybe that's my stinking cheating inner JRPG hacker talking.

We might have to fight the Queen actually, so maybe 2/1/2 would be better after all. Just remember, once your speed increases enough to attack twice as fast, your effective attack power doubles.

Plus if we put too many points in Defense Chloe will start looking like this

voting 1/2/2

>>334467
I'm gonna be boring and say balanced.

Θ][Σ 2010/10/14(Thu)18:03 No. 25034 ID: dad664
File 128710459388.png - (156.36KB , 1024x768 , ChloeGrr.png )

Have a thing that amazed even myself in how good it came out.

>>334834
That is badass! And...looks...-vaguely- Eldarish...

My tablet just died, it had been intermittently powering off starting last night, and right now it just out and out went kaput. Wire inside the USB cord is probably broken.

So the Quest is on indefinite hold until I can save up the spare cash to get a Bamboo Pen.

you check the battery?

>>335352
It doesn't run on a battery, it's a USB plug hardwired to the tablet. It's an old Graphire3, doesn't have the newfangled detachable mini-USB cord that the Bamboos have.

Updoot: Early morning hours brings about crazy ideas.

Tablet cord is now pinched together and taped down with a fuckton of masking tape. No amount of shaking is causing it to malfunction.

Now I just need to find some duct tape instead.

>>335378
Got any friends handy with soldering irons? They might be able to fix it in a more elegant way.

Cool quest, by the way!

>>335397
It's not an issue with the internal soldering. It's an issue with the cord.

>>335399
he means strip the case off the wire and melt the break back together.

>>335401
Yep. Either just patch the break in the cable, or do the more complex thing and open the entire thing, trim the cable to the break, and re-do the solder points on the circuit board inside. Eats away a fair bit of cable, dependending on where the break is, but ends up looking like-new. Quite involved though, obviously.

Quite awesome, can't wait for the next part!

>>336204
I've been derailed by a cold all week, so once I'm done hacking my lungs up I'll start up Act 7.

!DReamEr2eU 2010/11/09(Tue)12:06 No. 26433 ID: 55c4cf
File 128933319362.png - (144.48KB , 666x666 , thetabday2010.png )

Happy birthday sweetie.

>>336233

I would blow her candle, if you know what I mean.

Θ][Σ 2010/11/09(Tue)12:36 No. 26435 ID: dad664
File 128933501574.png - (353.45KB , 402x597 , ProtomanFuckYeah.png )

>>336233
D'aaaaw, thank's darlin' :3c

(If anyone was wondering, I turned 24 today)

>>336235
Congrats then.

Happy late birthday then

So it's sort of come to my attention that Aberration has its fair share of failings. That there's places where it could improve, and things that are either broken or horrendously cliche can be fixed. Obviously we don't have an official criticism thread, so this is the next best thing.

So please, feel free to speak your minds. Where can I do better? What sticks out like a sore thumb about it? I don't enjoy entertaining the prospect of running a quest that doesn't provide an enjoyable experience to those who read it.

I'll start with the obvious.

Update more frequently.

>>339928

This a hundred of times. You know, most flaws can be forgiven as long as you update frequently.

>>339912
I actually liked the whole supernatural aspect of it. I always find supernatural horror to be more scary than science horror. But it would be kind of hard to retcon the retcon and it's your story.

Other than that, yeah frequent updates would be nice. Possibly a clearer map. Makes it easier to actually get stuff done. And maybe an earbud comlink to the Red Lady so we have a nice in quest way to gain clarity in things.

>>339912
Besides the slow update speed, I'm not sure I like this new direction you're going in. You were going somewhere interesting with the previous chapters, then all of the sudden it turned into Tozol Quest v2.

I think it's fine as it is. If we didn't like it we wouldn't be participating. Regular updates attract suggesters. One a day is all it needs.

>>339944
In all honestly, I don't know what the new direction is. Too many reboots, too much scenery-chewing writing at the start of the last one (...or was it the one before by now?). I just dropped out paying attention to the words.

As long as we're giving feedback about anything, I'll tell you:

This

http://quest.lv/kusaba/quest/src/129160306912.gif

Is one of the worst OPs ever. I'm sorry man, but when you scroll down it's so easy to miss the quest because it looks like just a black square. It's a lot of wasted space and tiny stuff.

Even when it's said "don't judge the book by the cover" people are always going to do it. So try to at least have the title of the quest in big, visible letters, preferably in the center of the image.

You know, the OP for this discusion thread is a more decent example of a good OP.

>>339940
>>339944
>>339951
I agree completely. Aberration was one of my favorite running quests up until around the point where you threw out everything. I can\'t even bear to read it now. You killed its soul when you rebooted it.

Hmm. Alright then. Well, the quest is going to go on a little hiatus then so I can tweak a few things regarding the storyline (no, it is NOT a reboot) to address the issues brought to light in here, as well as work on simplifying the art style so it is faster to draw without sacrificing quality, so I can crank out more updates (1-2 per day sound good?).

Thank you for your assistance in this matter though! Criticism is always welcome, as I wont know where to improve if it's not brought to my attention.

Θ][Σ 2011/01/30(Sun)19:38 No. 30498 ID: dad664
File 129644513628.jpg - (230.97KB , 800x600 , YouAreSoFucked.jpg )

Penny for your thoughts (again)

Is this visually pleasing, or is it too noisy/messy/sketchy?

>>340298
Not sure. I'd have to see a little more of that style before I can decide.

It's a bit crowded, but in this case that works to make it seem like some writhing mass of chaos, which is what I assume was intended. I like it.

Θ][Σ 2011/01/30(Sun)20:47 No. 30504 ID: dad664
File 129644922828.jpg - (99.00KB , 600x600 , Example.jpg )

>>340300
>>340299
Better example?

>>340304
Those are fine.

I think it looks ugly because you don't draw any actual lines. Everything that looks like a line in those drawings is actually a mess of line segments pointing in similar directions. It's not aesthetically pleasing to me to look at something that resembles a mess of dirty twigs.

>>340298 is an especial offender in this regard.

Θ][Σ 2011/01/30(Sun)23:42 No. 30514 ID: dad664
File 129645974473.jpg - (27.11KB , 600x600 , Example2.jpg )

This is a fair bit more time-consuming than the previous example, but it's shiny and clean.

I guess I'll just have to end up putting it to a vote or something.

>>340314

If you'd ask me, Plantigrade looks a hell lot better

I like the first one

Fine, good, acceptable, sufficient, to par. Always has been in my opinion no matter what style or effort you've been using.

Work on arm/leg size in proportion to the torso. Shortening the two lower segments of legs would help.

>>340315
Digitgrade is when she's got her body's focus on speed. More springy for goesfast-ness.

Also I have a habit of drawing things in their current iteration :V

>>340317
limb proportions are fine. She is a bunny standing on her toes. your standard human anatomy proportions no longer apply. :U

(if you cover the picture up at the ankles, she looks quite normal)

The sketchy ones actually look quite a bit better.

Simple character design is almost always the way to go. It is effective, and expresses the character. The digitgrade legs could work fine if you can handle drawing them in weird angles all the time which i'm sure you could handle. That crazy horror design is far more than noisy, it's awful character design for almost any standpoint.

However, it's not bad. Just not good for constant moving protagonist, you could still use the concept for special circumstances/horror times because if it's only a small amount of the time, it's far more jarring.

Keep the design simple, streamlined, and expressive, but that doesn't mean she can't go batshit from time to time.

>>340311
Don't listen to this guy, slightly scribbly is better, especially when she's shapeshifting

Seven is right that if even a small portion of a beam weapon's output were reflected back at the user it could blind them, burn their face off, set clothing on fire, etc. You shouldn't get angry at him for pointing that out. It and the following arguments should stay out of the main thread.

There is no lens and focal assembly to the weapon so it may not be beam based.

>>340978
Except it's been established that Tozol Quest has developed laser-like weapons with none of those side effects, and until stated otherwise it's safe to assume we have access to that same tech.

>>340978
>Seven is right
See, you started off on the wrong foot here, and it just got worse from there.

Sci-fi. He can go show off how S.M.R.T. he is that he can read Wikipedia pages (then flake out at the maths) elsewhere, because it's all totally irrelevant.

>>/quest/281157
Test firing those would make gunshots and gunshots are loud and attract security forces. That's a no-no.

ATK/DEF/SPD
POWER

1st choice (soldier)
4/3/1
bone darts
kill everything. no survivors. no prisoners.

2nd choice (pacifist)
1/1/6
paralysis venom
run, paralyze, run, paralyze, run, paralyze.

>>342722
3/3/2 Ogre Rock Artillery. Specialize in carrying around a sack of boulders are throwing them at anything that moves. If something gets close enough despite BOULDER RAIN, hit them with your sack.

>"ending"
: |

I am highly displeased with this. May as well lock the quest thread. Discussion should be in here anyway.

rage lvl: 1000%

Well that's disappointing as all hell.

Yeeeeaaaah. I'm kinda done with Aberration. I know people liked it but I didn't really end up caring much for it since I fucked it over so many times and made the plot just as schizophrenic as its main character.

TL;DR: Too many ideas caused it to pile up harder than a de-railed train.

would rather it of just been dropped then it being all a dream. AGAIN. all a dream means that everything that has happened so far was completely pointless, while an open end would mean that while it isn't going forward we had some impact on the character.

>>345831
Not to mention it originally started out as a spin-off/rip-off of RubyQuest back during the Pchat days, and basically was that way when the quest first started. Then I go and switch it into the Tozol Quest universe for some reason which I don't even know anymore.

I mean fuck, it got to the point where there was hardly anything in it that was actually mine. Goddammit.

So yeah. I'm just extremely apathetic about the whole thing right now. Is it ended? Maybe. Fuck if I know right now.

Well, I was going to make threatening gestures in IRC until I realized that that was actually an end. Response reduced to flipping a piece of cardboard. (ﾉ-_-)ﾉ━

>Then I go and switch it into the Tozol Quest universe for some reason which I don't even know anymore.
The universe seemed cooler before I forgot how to update?

I think the main problem with this quest was that it tried to tie-in to too many other ongoing or completed quests at the same time. I was okay with the Ruby Quest style myself (I mean the Barbed Wheel is like one of the main symbols of the quest right?) but when it suddenly went OHBTW IT'S TOZOLQUEST NAO I think the real problems started.

I'd like to see more of this quest myself, but only after an overall theme/style is finally figured out. (Though preferably more like when the Quest started as opposed to the TozolQuest stuff imo)

As always I'm sorry if I stated the obvious or said anything really stupid. xnx

>>345836
Naw, that had (has?) nothing to do with it. Just me being stupid and ripping off of other people instead of just doing something of my own creation.

Damn it, now how can I destroy the world, or worlds? Now I'm going to have to do it in another quest, which I was adimitedly planning to do all along anyway. But now I get out less potential for world destruction.

>>345832
>It was all a dream again
Iunno, that seems an entirely fitting way for this quest to end. :V

So, quick question.

If I did another quest (something new), what kind of setting would you all prefer? Fantasy? Modern? Science-Fiction?

I've got ideas for all three kinds but I want to see what the public is more interested in.

Fantasy.

let's stay away from sci-fi for now. think fantasy would be best.

>>345893
Depends on the sort of ideas you'd be pursuing in those settings, really.

>>345893
I'd like to see a modern setting (maybe 2020-ish?) as long as it contains HORROR.
I want to feel that feeling of looming evil. I want something to keep me up at night. I want Eldritch abominations, high octane nightmare fuel, violence, paranoia, fast-paced bloody action, creepy places, scary animated gifs, ghosts, hard-to-solve puzzles, let me see the cutest girl ever having a psychotic rampage, Shyamalanic twist endings etc. I want to read the most disturbing thing ever!!



Yeah, I'm not a fan of sleeping...

I have to admit though that you were doing an exceptional work with the first two chapters of Aberration (which actually got me hooked)... but I slowly started to loose interest with so many changes every time we got to the next chapter, man.
I want you to know that I like your art (your style is very attractive) and that I like the way you narrate the story, but you lost me between chapters and the fact that it got a lot like Tozol quest. But hey, I'm still reading it and I'll try to keep up with the next chapter, but if you're feeling like staring a new quest I'll look forward to it!

Pre-historic, no one tackles that shit. It'd be badass to be UGHUGH the caveman swinging his fucking club at a raptor.

But seriously, let's just get with the fantasy.

>>345893
Already been through modern and sci-fi. Lets go with fantasy, some world shattering spells can surely be found. Or world dominating ones.

I'd like to see more Chole at some point in the future.


But at the moment - modern or futuristic stuff sounds the best.

Futuristic, but none of that "Escape from the Military Facility" stuff. If it's a futuristic setting then maybe have it take place in a city over an old city, and have the unfathomable horror lurking beneath the streets in the old city or something. :V

I'll vote fantasy,
cause last time I voted Sci-fi I got "lost planet"

>>345916

Why are you complaining :<

>>345902
I'm interested to see what you could do in a fantasy setting.

I vote fantasy, too. It's fun to mix it up.

Fantasy it is then :V

Already have a few ideas floating around, I just need to settle on a plot for said quest. ETA, eh, at least before the end of the month?

Chloe in a fantasy setting.

>>346028
Is this an invitation for plot suggestions?

Boy meets girl, becomes infatuated. Girl swallows sun, becomes tyrannical magical overlord. Suggesters define the rest.

Something with Dark Paladins.
Need more lawful evil characters in quests, i tell you.

I vote Sergals.

Plot suggestions?

A dragon hunter that gets turned into a dragon.
>>346057
Plus nice girl goes blood drunk
>>346058
Plus Dark Paladins

There, basic plot ready to serve :)

>>346084
Yesssss

I vote against sergals. There's too much baggage. Preconceived notions etc.

Chole in a fantasy setting.

>>346084
Upon closer inspection, the sergals turn out to be made of sergals.

>>346112
Upon even closer inspection, the entire universe is made out of microscopic sergals

doobies are the only correct choice here

>>346132
Now, that would be fun.

>>346086
>Dragon hunter -> Dragon
The dragon's long dead, but died in seclusion. You head up into an empty lair, fall asleep on the hoard, whose latent magical potential chooses you as the new owner.
SHENANIGANS ENSUE.

>>346136
>latent magical potential chooses you as the new owner.
The normal way of it isn't just lolmagic, but that coveting the dragon-less hoard causes you to become the dragon.

I would not be opposed to another dragon quest. Or even another half-dragon quest.

>>346140
Yes, but this lets us play the hoard.

Here's a bit of plot for you, expanding on the blood drunk girl, dark paladins and the dragonhunter turned dragon. Spoilered to hide the plots, in-case any are picked up.


You being turned into a dragon is a plot by an order of dark paladins
Reasons?
Revial of a Dark Dragon
For the Evulz
Some nebulous plan
For immortality/invincibility(apparently good things happen when you kill a dragon, unless you are in Tale of the Guardians)
To get a source of dragon's blood

Alternatively the Dark paladins served a dark dragon and think you are their master reborn, you have to play along so as you aren't killed. hjinks ensue...

Now for the Blood drinker...
NOT A VAMPIRE! Have her cut open beings and drink the gushing blood.

Now you can have it that;
She is evil and enjoys being blood drunk
She is a nice girl but she just sometimes gets so HUNGRY!!!!
She is mindless completely drunk on blood.
Or go the multiple personalities route... or Yangire

Amnesia is good for fun with this person

For added horror, make it unclear who the blood drunk girl is (have multiple suspects)

Now as to why?
She is a walking sacrifice, instead of collecting people to be sacrificed, she drinks their blood, so when the time to revive the dark whatever comes only she needs to be caught

Or Somebody is trying to make a god/demon
Or she is...

Or Food for the dark dragon.

For added horror, have it that she has as many 'lives' as those whose blood she has drunk.

Dark Paladins being related to her is optional.
Also Cult of BLOOD!, who have the usual world destruction fetish, have them be chaotic stupid, in contrast to the fallen paladins who are not stupid, also have the paladins range in evilness, and lawfulness Call it DRAGONBLOOD!
Include much navel pondering about blood and how it changes things and connects things

Throw in a mysterious wizard/witch whose's motives are nebulous, other dragons, dragon hunters who knew you and UNCORRUPTED paladins too. Oh and smart sentient sapient skeletons. Cause talking, moving skeletons are awesome!

>>346143
oh, that's actually a quite nice idea. I still feel the coveting is important, though. And the problem with the hoard being us is that hoards are very non-portable.

>>346145
Most of those are combinable. In particular:

>She is evil and enjoys being blood drunk
>She is a nice girl but she just sometimes gets so HUNGRY!!!!
She is a nice girl but she enjoys being blood-drunk. Sort of like how nice girls in real life enjoy being normal-drunk. This can function as a sort of a sex metaphor thing as per older vampires. And she gets a bit crazy when drunk on the blood.

also
>Walking Sacrifice
>Food for Dark Dragon
Fuse these. She collects the blood for the dragon. He drinks the blood from her body, and it increases his power. I don't know what for of power would be increased, exactly. I guess it would be the same style of dark magic used by the paladins. Presumably the dragon's eating of things directly would also be related to this, but far less efficient since the girl is designed for the purpose.

Also the two were a couple before this, the Dark Paladins serve the dragon but I like that hoard idea. So maybe they served the old dragon, and then a new guy became the dragon, so they serve him, and turned his girl into the sacrificial vampire, with or without the Dragon's permission.

I reckon the game should start with the main character just having become the Dragon, with the Paladins appearing shortly after some initial character creation and monologuing about the tragedy of having become a dragon. The girl would have remained at home while her man went to act out his greed and seize the dragon's treasure.


However note that Theta has not actually answered the question "Is this an invitation for plot suggestions?". Maybe he doesn't even want these ideas.

>>346147
While I already have something quite different in mind for my next project, I still find this all amusing. Might not go remotely near the way you all are theorycrafting but some elements I might utilize.

>>346148
Good that you're getting some ideas percolating... I might do something with some of the stuff I mentioned myself.

I'm interested to see what you come up with anyway. :D

>>346147

The combinableness is deliberate, it's the whole pick and mix idea, or pick and don't mix...

I like the 'they were a couple' idea, but, I myself would make them some form of husband and wife, cause there is a dearth of that pairing as main duo

>>346148
In that case I may run something of this nature myself, when the summer rolls around and I have a bit of time. Because this seems like an awesome story to me.

I figure these vague combinations of story ideas could make a good running joke in the real quest. Everyone is concerned with some crazy ass mix-and-match legend like the above while the real hero is getting the important shit, whatever Theta comes up with, done.

The Dark Paladins end up being nothing more than the medieval equivalent of nerds. The dragon is a cat dressed up as a dragon. The blood-drunker is a prostitute. And crazy hijinks ensue as they all get mass publicity.

>>346156
Nah, this deserves better than that. See:
>>346157