The cutting-edge in police and judiciary technology, eliminating the need for such outdated techniques as criminal psychology, due process, and interrogation.
Super Smash Brothers Brawl
Speaking of which, what do you think of the new roster that just went up, Frillsby?

Just have a talk or two. Seems like they just need a friend. And fewer dumpsters to be around.

Beat Lady in game.

Then hit Lady with an egg.

"Nearly everyone left is a victim of war. Has lost friends, family, their old lives. They're starting over, and you can too."

LawyerDog 2014/04/25(Fri)19:07 No. 572412 ID: cf16c8
File 139847804340.png - (221.40KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 028.png )

The solution to many problems is playing more Smash Bros, and this is surely one of those problems. It'll be fine.
"Nearly everyone left is a victim of war. They lost friends, family, their old lives. They're starting over, and you can too. Plus there's no way you're gonna get away with trash talkin' Yoshi without Smashing Gallsby."
>"Don't really have any other options left at this point with you guys bein' all responsible and shit and goin' around not killing people. Haven't had people to Smash with in ages, I'll be pretty rusty but it'll be enough to take out any Yoshi."
I think we're pretty much in the clear here. She didn't even try to actually harm anyone, I think it'll be fine to just take the cuffs off once we get home.
Yams is gonna chill out and eat chicken at Randy's for now, he can't deal with any more excitement today. A little awkward chat with Randy and Khivat apologizing to eachother and then we bail and have an uneventful walk home.

>>throw her a steve shirt !
Mission complete! Khivat is now wearing a Steve shirt. I take the cuffs off and we get set up for Gallsby to 1v1 Khivat. Khivat goes Fox and Gallsby goes with Yoshi.

It's not even close, Gallsby gets demolished. There's shines everywhere. Waveshines, shinegrabs, multishines, shinespikes, shine upsmash, shine back air, it's nuts. Gallsby falls back on Kirby and Jigglypuff and it doesn't go much better, even rusty Khivat is just totally outclassing him. I don't fare much better, and it's only when we start doing 2v1s that she starts ever losing stocks.

>>Beat Lady in game. Then hit Lady with an egg.
We are gonna need a sick training montage before we're able to do this.

Chapter 1 End.

>>572412
ALERT ALERT THERE IS A NAKED BUTT ON THE COUCH

DISPENSE UNDERWEAR IMMEDIATELY

>>572413
antimagic couch doesn't get burned, and neither would Gallsby's crotch supporting her fine ass while they played smash together, heheh.

Que the Sound of Silence and realize you've made a terrible mistake by allowing her to smash bros with you
It was clearly the more superior option to smash her in real life and that dumpstering her would have removed a demoness with incredible powers from this universe, granting you all a mercy

You've allowed the continued existence of a monster. The stocks the world will lose are all on your hands as much as hers.
You've doomed us all. You've doomed Yoshi.
You doomed Yoshi, you bastards.

>>572481
no one belongs on gallsby's lap but frillsby you heretic

Chapter 2 Gallsby 2014/05/27(Tue)02:12 No. 576215 ID: 0bd34b
File 140118192014.png - (244.76KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 029.png )

It is really hot. Like hella hot.
And our air conditioning is hella broken.

"Frillsby I'm hot."
>"Really Gallsby. Really. I am in shock. Absolutely stunned. Never would have guessed."
"When's the guy gonna come to fix it?"
>"Tomorrow. Maybe. He's busy."
"no"
>"Yes."

Mannnnnn that's not cool. Being hot is not cool at all, it is practically the opposite of cool.

>>576215
Do you know any ice mages? No?

POOL PARTY. Or go to the beach. Or like, find an excuse to spend time inside a building that has working air conditioning.

Is Khivat still hanging around?

Start off by using this opportunity to call him hot as in sexy. Then suggest removing then rest of your clothes to keep cool. Then put some pants on and go to the store to buy hella ice. Unless you already have hella ice in the freezer in which case pants can stay off and you can get ye ice.

I also hear putting watermelon in your mouth is a good way to cool down.

If you're in or near a tall building chilling on the roof of it would probably be better than staying inside, even with a fan.

Also watermelon in mouth.

Use some towels and make sure to clean yourselves off regularly, is it just hot or humid? Might wanna find a way to drain it and make it a nice dry heat.

>>576215
Find the source of the heat and destroy it once and for all. Especially if it's the sun.

Really though, getting out of the house and going to a pool or something might be good. If Khivat's in the house and contributing to the heat, you can maybe tell her to try to chill out or something.

Or take a road trip to Canada.

Wow sweet gallsby! Frillsby totally thinks you're hot.

>>576215
Khivat moved in radiates too much heat?
or is it just.. summer?

Are their any ice villains you've fought before? Maybe you can goad them into attacking you.

who needs the sun anyway just get rid of it for a while

Do you have a shower? Take a nice cool shower together.

>>576215
Throw ice on gallsby and tell him it's 'ice to meet him'

Gallsby 2014/05/28(Wed)23:57 No. 576369 ID: 0bd34b
File 140134666610.png - (229.03KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 030.png )

>>Is Khivat still hanging around?
Yeah she's living with Yams right now and they play Smash all the time. She works with Randy on finding new ways to put garlic into things and then heat them, and she does odd jobs like welding and stuff that require her heat power. She seems like she's doing pretty well now.

"Hey Frillsby you're hot like hot as in sexy not hot as in temperature but also you're hot as in temperature but right now I am talking about hot as in sexy because you are."
>"...okay."
My wooing of Frillsby is ineffectual in this heat and for no other reason! I must enact plan: "Cool it or Yule it." I hope the cool it part works, because I have no idea where our Kurisumasu stuff is.

>>I also hear putting watermelon in your mouth is a good way to cool down.
Whoa this is a great idea. I should inform Frillsby of this idea.

"Yo Frillsby I heard putting watermelon in your mouth is a good way to cool down!"
>"We don't have any watermelon, Gallsby."
"What! Sure we do! I'll show you."
I jam my claw through it to get a good grip and start licking all over it.

Gallsby 2014/05/28(Wed)23:58 No. 576370 ID: 0bd34b
File 140134670285.png - (172.19KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 031.png )

"See we totally had some watermelon popsicles in the freezer!"
>"Oh shit son, toss me one!"
I toss him one and then move on to steps 2-11 of my ultimate plan.

"Get some towels, a bag of ice, a pool, and meet me on the roof. Come on, Watermelon!"
>"What. How am I supposed to- Gallsby where are you going.

Gallsby 2014/05/29(Thu)00:01 No. 576371 ID: 0bd34b
File 140134691416.png - (143.06KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 032.png )

So we end up on the roof. I managed to get a couple buckets of water up here, and Frillsby got all his items of interest, and I convinced him it was a good idea to be nude since he had no bathing suit. Problem is he only found a blow-up kiddie pool. We compromise by taking turns pouring ice water on each other in the pool. It's Frillsby's turn to chill right now, but there's some good wind up here to help out too.

"And now it's time to enact step 12!"
>"Wait what are you talking about step 12 of what."
"Destruction of the sun!"
>"What."
"The!"
>"Gallsby no y-"
"SUN!"
>"I think the heat has gotten to you."
"Yes, which is why we need to destroy the sun!"
>"Okay fine Gallsby, how are we going to destroy the sun, then?"

uh.

>>576371
You get a huge ice cube, right? And you launch it into space, right at the sun. It'll poof right out.

Let's go find/make the biggest ice cube.

>>576371
Do something so lewd the sun flees in embarassment

Ancient dance to summon the rain gods, who will do battle with sun beast and allow for the greatest of sun blockage with clouds.

And then you'll have maize for years to come.

We moon the sun! The sun can't come out at night! (Cue sunburned butts).

...or, the sun's magic right? We just need to get close enough to anti-magic it! We need to rocket to the sun! Clearly, that's the best plan to cool off!

Gallsby & Frillsby: Offer to share your popsicle.

Frillsby & Gallsby: "Yes."

blood sacrifices

LawyerDog 2014/07/10(Thu)19:29 No. 583732 ID: 0bd34b
File 140504577054.png - (177.26KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 033.png )

"Okay check it, we get this huge ice cube, right?"
>"Wrong."
"Okay so we'll do something so lewd that the sun flees in embarrassment! We can share eachother's popsicles."
>"Sun sees people bangin' all the time, Gallsby."
"... Ancient rain dance?"
>>"GO GO GO GO"
>"The fuck is that?"
*CRASH*
>>"I started gettin' real hype and then I hear SOMEBODY DOESN'T LOVE IT. You actin' a foo' if you think you can stop the sun and stop my tan. WE TANNIN' FOREVER, WE IN THERE. ALL SUN ALL THE TIME."

LawyerDog 2014/07/10(Thu)19:30 No. 583733 ID: 0bd34b
File 140504585808.png - (154.94KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 034.png )

>>"YOU GOT THREE SECONDS TO GIVE UP ON YOUR PLANS BEFORE THE GUNS COME OUT."
He seems supremely preoccupied by himself and his muscles so Frillsby starts whispering to me.
>"Gallsby who the fuck is this?!
>>"FIVE."
"I'unno."
>>"FOUR."
>"Any idea how to take care of him?"

Stab 'im in the dick. Or go inside, he's probably powered by the sun.

>>583733
tell him you are willing to compromise: He stands guard as our shade and gets to soak up all the sunrays that would otherwise be wasted on us sun-haters!

The only way to deal with him is to go super-saiyan as well and start punching.

Just tell him that he has shown you the error of your sun hating ways. Ask to learn his secrets to getting a awesome tan while not getting heat stroke.

Then if he remains annoying shove him off the edge of the building while he is flexing.

>>583733

"Geez man, we were kidding. We got like, fluff all over us, its like being stuck under a blanket all day."

Good point. It's hard to get a tan without bare skin.
Best not to say that lest he decides to skin us so we can better praise the sun.
But yeah sunbro we chill. Well actually, not chill, not at all, but seriously, you need to chill. It's "fun" in the sun, not double homicide in the sun.

Gallsby should sneak up and touch his butt. Then, while hes distracted, Frills can sucker punch him. Once he's down for the count you can go get Yams to throw him into the sun.

Dude needs to chill a bit. Offer him some mushrooms and listen to some trance music.

Just wait for the inevitable skin cancer to finish him off for you.

we can't get turnt up if we're dead.

Simply praise the sun, he will understand.

you two are actual police men you can totally take on this guy

>>583767
This is a good plan. Try to talk him down and find some common ground. Diplomacy beats violence any day.

Also, I wouldn't try to take him in a direct fight. His power level is probably off the charts and you're weakened by the heat.

Gallsby 2014/08/01(Fri)03:34 No. 587325 ID: 0bd34b
File 140688927258.png - (235.85KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 035.png )

I do the praise the sun gesture but he doesn't react at all! I don't think there will be any jolly cooperation here.
>>"THREE"
>"Hey man how about having some mushrooms and listening to trance music?"
>>"You a cop?"
"Yeah we're actual police men!"
>>"You tryin' to TRICK ME? YOU'RE NOT GETTIN' ME ON DRUG CHARGES. YOU GOT ONE SECOND BEFORE THE GUNS COME OUT."
"Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. Whoa. We've seen the error of our sun hating ways."
Then while he's considering this Frillsby starts goin' super saiyan and so do I and we're cool tough guys now.

Gallsby 2014/08/01(Fri)03:34 No. 587326 ID: 0bd34b
File 140688928574.png - (189.75KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 036.png )

"YO FRILLSBY PUNCH THAT DUDE."
>>"Go ahead and try, my sun powers render me INVINCIBLghafguh-"

Gallsby 2014/08/01(Fri)03:34 No. 587327 ID: 0bd34b
File 140688929825.png - (137.64KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 037.png )

Also Yams is here for some reason I dunno. It's kind of weird that he's here maybe we need to figure that out later.
"YO YAMS THROW THAT DUDE INTO THE SUN."
>>"MAKE ME ONE WITH THE SUN. I WILL BE AN ENTITY OF TAN."
Yams totally throws that dude into the sun and all our problems should be totally solved now. But they're not.
"Frillsby it's still hot! Has all of this been for nothing?!"
>"It'll take about 8 minutes Gallsby geez. It would be ridiculous if it just instantly got cooler."
"Oh."
It's at this point that Frillsby realizes that he's still naked and Yams is here, so he scrambles for his boxers and puts them on.
With all our problems totally solved we're free to do pretty much anything! I'm not sure how we should celebrate though! Maybe I should ask Frillsby or Yams if I can't think of anything.

shrooms and trance

the rooftop is our ibiza except without middle aged people eveyrhwere

...are you sure you guys didn't get sunstroke or something. I'm kind of wouldn't be surprised if you're passed out and fever-dreaming right now.

>>587327
Go bowling!

Lets go to a nightclub and twerk all night long to the beat.

any cool dive bars in this town? or, alternately, any cool sales on crappy convenience store flavored vodka?

Suplex Sengen.

Frillsby 2014/10/12(Sun)22:40 No. 598087 ID: 0bd34b
File 141317882831.png - (130.75KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 038.png )

So Gallsby passed the fuck out when we were trying different things to stay cool. It was close enough to night that I've just let him sleep through to the next day. He had also been up for like 60 hours because I had mentioned in passing that it was a bad idea, and he was like "I BET I CAN DO IT AND IT WOULD BE FINE." No amount of "gallsby no" would dissuade him. He's been saying some weird shit in his sleep but it's probably fine. Our air conditioner is fixed now, so we can just chill in all senses of the word now.
Gallsby's still out like a light, and I'm not sure what shenanigans I should get up to with him asleep and no trouble happening.

Act like the president. Grab his crotch and ask him if he knows who the Patriots are. Delicately.

Do not molest the sleeping Gallsby. Do not. I'd say draw on him a little but it's not like you can draw on fur.

You could cook something. Or go bowling.

Set up a recorder next to him so you can embarrass him with his dream ramblings later.

Also you could dress him up and take embarrassing photos in whatever silly outfits you could fit on him without waking him up.

Record dream ramblings and set them to his ringtone. And on the answering machine.

Maybe put a silly hat on him. Drawing on him is a classic, put fur makes that harder. As do your terrifying claw-hands.

Smell him a little. Not so much as to be creepy just... you know... get a nose full of that musk.
Nothing creepy just bro shenanigans smell him.

pile as much food on top of him as you can

Steal his underpants and when he wakes up tell him a wizard did it.

Stack dog treats on him until he wakes up and shakes them off.

Can you lift your feet up over your head.

Frillsby 2015/01/08(Thu)20:40 No. 618988 ID: 32e321
File 142077845143.png - (64.33KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 039.png )

>>Molest/do not molest/strip the sleeping Gallsby
I've uh, never actually even seen Gallsby naked. I always end up losing when our dumb bets involve stripping. I look away when helping him get dressed, and we didn't actually look at each other when measuring ourselves. Taking off his underwear now would be like cheating, and I would never hear the end of it. I must acquire his crotch with feats of skill.

>>Stack dog treats/food on him
I can totally play stackems all up on this fool though. I grab a box of treats and start piling them on him.

Some of the treats on his crotch start rising up so I quickly start putting more on and try to not think about the cause of it. Nope. Just gonna keep putting treats on his crotch.

>"HI FRILLSBY"
"AAAFHWUHGggggggoddamnit Gallsby."
>"Why aren't you super saiyan anymore? Why are you putting all these treats on me? Is this a way to get cool? Am I cool?"

Current objective: Explain yourself
Ultimate objective: Acquire the crotch

>>618988
>Grab Gallsby boner
"Explain THIS first."
Route him HARD, just like his erect penis.

>>618999
Alternatively:
"Yes gallsby, but now you are TOO cool. We must warm up."
Proceed to grab boner.

>>618988
Dude, Frillsby, you already know you're both into each other. Like it isn't obvious. Why haven't you taken the next step yet? I mean, you knew he was gay for a long ass time but he didn't know you were gay. Right? Or do you not know he's gay and you just assumed all those weird flirts were coming from a straight guy so assured of his straightness that he could flirt all he wants with dudes and not give a shit what people think?

I mean, if you KNEW he was gay, but he didn't you, why did you ever ask him yourself? Who's supposed to take the first step?

Why shoot around the bush so damn much, because you're afraid of changing your friendship despite your constant clear arousal for each other that you both have gay boners ALL the time? I mean, is it EVER going to progress or are you both going to be stuck in the friendzone forever because you've both think you're IN the friendzone?

>>618988
You gotta grab that boner. Tell him to explain that boner.
And then confiscate his clothes.

>>618988
Tell him you were trying to find out how many of these things you could stack on him but I guess now you'll never know.

Then I GUESS you should go out on a date or something. Go to the beach, maybe!

Tell him that you were just prepping wake-up snackems for when he woke up.

Explain that you never galo'd the sengen.

Explain to him you were setting the scene for the next great American novel. You needed the proper inspiration, and sometimes inspiration is hot cool dudes covered in delicious snacks which you then eat.

Slowly reach out and grab one of the treats on the top of the pile and then slowly lick one side of it. Then stick the treat to his forehead.

Gallsby 2015/01/09(Fri)08:03 No. 619046 ID: 32e321
File 142081941844.png - (59.94KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 040.png )

[Character switch to Gallsby]

>"I was never a saiyan, Gallsby. That was a dream you had."
"wow dang."
>"Our AC is fixed now, and cool dudes covered in treats in the new hot thing. I'm gonna write a novel and this is what all the best novel writers do to get inspiration it's a reasonable course of actions okay."
"dang wow."
>"AlsoIwanttograbyourboner"
"Whaaaaaaaaaaaat"
"You can do that then, Frillsby. Definitely okay with that happening. Zero protest.
>"But I gotta earn it it's gonna like a sick cheevo Gallsby okay."
"Gotta up your gay murr score."
>"Gallsby no."
"Anyway that's silly, Frillsby. You're silly."
>"F-feats of skill tho."


Dang. He's a goof sometimes and will start thinking he doesn't deserve things unless he earns them in some arbitrary way.
What should I say to get Frillsby to accept the dillsby?
A. "Fight me. First to three gets the D."
B. "You literally saved my life like saving a princess in a vidjeo game. That means you get to grab the princess's dick, like in all the vidjeo games."
C. "You've earned it through winning over my heart and soul. And probably my liver and a maybe a lung."
D. "bruh"
E. Other

A.

Give him a sporting chance, though. He gets to chose the kind of 'combat' (so he can pick something in his favor). And heck, all three can be different!

Option D.
Uhh, y'know, the fourth one.

Or, if that doesn't work, something that would make him earn it, like option A.

>>619046
A.
Wrestling is the best foreplay. And it's win-win. If you win, you get HIS D. If you lose, well handjob or something else, I don't know!

"bruh"

Best out of 3 in naked twister.

D. Its so crazy it just might work.

Give him the D and some A iykwim

>>619046
A.
Nothing's more fair than a fight for the D.

B and D. For real.

A. I recommend a cock fight.

LawyerDog 2015/01/10(Sat)17:10 No. 619347 ID: 32e321
File 142093863203.png - (242.84KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 041.png )

"bruh."
>"No."
"Okay then fight me. First to three gets the D."
>"Wait what would you get if you win."
"The same thing, I get to grab your D."
>"Gallsby you have giant claws."
"Yeah so just win then."
>"..."
"Gotta make the stakes high, Frillsby!"
>"...What are we fighting in?"

A. "Loser of the last game picks the next game. Since you always lose you pick first."
B. "Hexagon Heat"
C. "Smash"
D. Other

>>619347
B.
Never Smash.
Because Smash is for babies.

A. Give him a chance before you beat him down with your awesome.

Naked Twister.

Wrestling.

The whole apartment:
rules: The floor is lava. No breakin' stuff.

Smash, because everything else is for babies.

>>619347
Settle it in Smash.

>>619347
GRRR SMASH

Challenge him to The Oldest Game, just because it sure has been a while since we've seen anyone here play it.

>>619347
A. It's the most reasonable thing.

>>619623

man, I missed that game. go for this.

Gallsby 2015/01/12(Mon)03:34 No. 619858 ID: c6fae3
File 142106245093.png - (40.92KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 042.png )

I challenge him to The Oldest Game, also known as Super Smash Bros 64. I decide to not try and sandbag, he might be able to tell anyway. As the N64 controller is the most perfect controller ever constructed, it'll be fine for me to play with my feet.

"Super Smash Bros. 64!"
>"The NA one, right? Those meat sounds in the Japanese version are fucked up I don't want none of that."
"Yeah son. But you're donezo, Yoshi is real as fuck in this game."
>"I will multi-shine your underwear off."
"Haha what. But you can't jump out of shine in this. Anyway: Best of 5, all Dreamland, you're gonna get rekt."

It turns out Frillsby is good at this video game. I think he might play 64 with Yams or something. I dunno how the hecko he was doing it but he was shining so much. SO much.
>"Land-canceled shines, baby." Oh okay.
The 6 blue lines end up being too strong. I manage to take one game but he ends up winning 3-1.
>"Yeaaaaaaaaaaah! Fox, baby."
"All right, you win the bet."
>"R-right. The bet."

Gallsby 2015/01/12(Mon)03:34 No. 619859 ID: c6fae3
File 142106248067.png - (101.97KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 043.png )

Frillsby's blushing like crazy before I even do anything.
>"...Pretty hot in here huh?"
"Frillsby can you even handle this? Are you going to catch on fire if I pull these down?"
>"No going back on a bet! Gonna grab that dick!"
His face is basically on fire after he says that. I finally pull down my underwear, and he just stares for a while.
"Well?"

Gallsby 2015/01/12(Mon)03:35 No. 619860 ID: c6fae3
File 142106252519.png - (150.02KB , 900x600 , FrillsbyAndGallsby Update 044.png )

Chapter 2 End.

GOOD END