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File 125426112698.png - (2.00KB , 600x400 , 1.png )
53585 No. 53585 ID: 4553b2

It is very dark. Hardly anything can be seen.
Expand all images
>>
No. 53586 ID: 9e9b47

push buttons!
>>
No. 53587 ID: 9cc8fd

Lick blue.
>>
No. 53588 ID: fb5d8e

Press the two white switches simultaneously.
>>
No. 53589 ID: 1afd58

>>53585
Lay there passively!
>>
No. 53590 ID: 476456

Lick blue!
>>
No. 53592 ID: b1e366

Lick red.
>>
No. 53594 ID: 4553b2
File 125426130433.png - (17.68KB , 600x400 , 1.png )
53594

You push both buttons!

Your ALARM CLOCK has activated!

The LIGHTS are now on!

QUEST 1 END.

GOOD MORNING END ACHIEVED.
>>
No. 53595 ID: 9e9b47

>>53594

cheer
>>
No. 53596 ID: 9e9b47

>>53594

cheer
>>
No. 53597 ID: 1afd58

>>53594
Good game guys. Even better than watchquest.
>>
No. 53598 ID: 4553b2
File 125426141410.png - (19.21KB , 600x400 , 2.png )
53598

You can't decide what to get for lunch.
>>
No. 53600 ID: fb5d8e

This was a triumph~
>>
No. 53601 ID: 9e9b47

>>53598

Tuna salad!
>>
No. 53602 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53598
Chicken sandwich, fries, root beer.
>>
No. 53603 ID: 476456

SMOKED TURKEY SANDWICH!
>>
No. 53604 ID: 1afd58

>>53598
Fish Taco.

If you know what I mean.
>>
No. 53605 ID: f78140

>>53598
BAGEL SANDWICH.
>>
No. 53608 ID: f44349

>>53598
FUCKING BACON CHEESEBURGER, MAN!
>>
No. 53609 ID: 4553b2
File 125426168630.png - (22.17KB , 600x400 , 2.png )
53609

Smoked tuna salad bagel sandwich with chicken fries and root beer!

QUEST 2 END
STRANGELY DELICIOUS CONCOCTION END ACHIEVED
>>
No. 53611 ID: 4553b2
File 12542618072.png - (15.33KB , 600x400 , 3.png )
53611

There is a one eyed cat with a note!
>>
No. 53612 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53611
Walk away.
>>
No. 53613 ID: 1afd58

>>53611
Hug cat, read note
>>
No. 53614 ID: ed8d8a

>>53611
Hug note read cat!
>>
No. 53618 ID: 9e9b47

>>53611

Pet cat, despair of the state of the world where kittens get harmed. Do not take his note, that's HIS note.
>>
No. 53619 ID: 39292f

HUG TOM READ NOTE
>>
No. 53622 ID: 4553b2
File 125426199055.png - (15.40KB , 600x400 , 3.png )
53622

You walk away.

Quest 3 End.

Dissapointed Cat achieved!
>>
No. 53623 ID: f44349

>>53611
HUG READ
NOTE CAT
>>
No. 53625 ID: ed8d8a

>>53622
You MONSTER!
>>
No. 53626 ID: 4553b2
File 125426222151.png - (29.68KB , 600x400 , 4.png )
53626

You take a girl to the movies.

Which movie do you want to see?
>>
No. 53628 ID: bffa2a

>>53626

Rape Quest
>>
No. 53629 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53626
District 9, damnit. I want to see that movie already, after Cam failed!
>>
No. 53630 ID: 5696d4

>>53626

RAPE QUEST
>>
No. 53631 ID: 476456

Rape quest.

or E
>>
No. 53632 ID: e3f578

Rudy Mann, watch babe get wet, get laid.
>>
No. 53633 ID: 64d98f

RUDY MANN
>>
No. 53634 ID: 9891a9

>>53626
Rudy Mann!
>>
No. 53635 ID: 9e9b47

>>53626

rape quest
>>
No. 53636 ID: ed8d8a

>>53626
Rudy Mann will make you single again, as your girlfriend will be in love with a projector screen.
>>
No. 53637 ID: 39292f

HUG TOM READ NOTE
>>
No. 53638 ID: f78140

rape quest.
>>
No. 53640 ID: 4553b2
File 125426249619.png - (16.96KB , 600x400 , 4.png )
53640

Rape Quest stopped showing a month ago!

You decide to watch RUDY MANN.

Quest 4 End.

Got Laid After achievement.
>>
No. 53642 ID: 4553b2
File 125426268685.png - (24.00KB , 600x400 , 5.png )
53642

You have a job interview! What do you do to prepare?
>>
No. 53643 ID: 9e9b47

>>53642

masturbate
>>
No. 53644 ID: ed8d8a

>>53642
Dress like a pirate
>>
No. 53645 ID: e3f578

Draw beard on face and practice yelling into the mirror to demand a job.
>>
No. 53647 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53642
Shower, shave, pants, shotgun.
>>
No. 53648 ID: bffa2a

>>53642

Sing TAKE ONNN MEEEEEE!
>>
No. 53649 ID: 18212a

DRESS LIKE A PIRATE CAPTAIN

If someone asks, you're a firm believer in the flying spaghetti monster and this is your religious apparel.
>>
No. 53651 ID: 4553b2
File 125426297272.png - (25.96KB , 600x400 , 5.png )
53651

Certainly this will get you the job!

Quest 5 end.

You didn't get the job achieved!
>>
No. 53652 ID: 18212a

>>53651
SUE THEM FOR DISCRIMINATING YOU FOR YOUR RELIGION
>>
No. 53654 ID: 4553b2
File 12542631801.png - (31.09KB , 600x400 , 6.png )
53654

This is all the food left in the house! Prepare for lunch.
>>
No. 53655 ID: 71ec2f

CAPN CRUNCH AND MAYO EQUALS DElICIOUS
>>
No. 53656 ID: 18212a

What? No chili?
Starve to death.
>>
No. 53657 ID: ed8d8a

>>53654
Grind captain crunch with mayo jar to make crumbs for breading. Apply this bearding to the beef and grill. Boil corn on the cob, serve with rootbeer.
>>
No. 53658 ID: 4553b2
File 125426347140.png - (25.39KB , 600x400 , 6.png )
53658

Cap'n Crunch and mayo is not as tasty as you have been lead to believe!

You decide to buy chili tomorrow.

Quest 6 end
wtfdidijusteat achieved
>>
No. 53659 ID: 7eda8b
File 125426349611.png - (81.88KB , 600x400 , WHOS_SENDS_BABIES_TO_FIGHT_ME.png )
53659

I respectfully disagree with your conclusions.
>>
No. 53660 ID: 4553b2
File 125426379327.png - (22.91KB , 600x400 , 7.png )
53660

Decide on girl to take to movies!
>>
No. 53661 ID: 40dc56

neither take your best bro
>>
No. 53662 ID: f78140

>>53660
both. at the same time.
>>
No. 53663 ID: 71ec2f

>>53660
I hear the one on the left is a delicious trap. Take her and hope you get ravished tonight.
>>
No. 53664 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53660
Yourself, also left chick.
>>
No. 53665 ID: f98e0b

Brunette
>>
No. 53666 ID: f44349

>>53660
Concoct a comically complicated plan to take them both to the movies at the same time!
>>
No. 53667 ID: 192956

>>53663
One on the left because large breasts doesn't always mean you'll get laid.
>>
No. 53668 ID: 476456

lefty has eyesockets!
>>
No. 53671 ID: 4553b2
File 12542640707.png - (15.18KB , 600x400 , 7.png )
53671

You take the girl on the left! You hope she is a trap...

Quest 7 ended
Trap Card Activated
>>
No. 53672 ID: 053bab

>>53660
Take the table!

Oh no wait, that's your head.
>>
No. 53677 ID: 4553b2
File 125426445764.png - (17.57KB , 600x400 , 8.png )
53677

There is a one eyed girl with a note!
>>
No. 53680 ID: 192956

>>53677
Take girl leave note
>>
No. 53681 ID: f44349

>>53677
READ HUG
NOTE GIRL
>>
No. 53682 ID: 43d730

>>53677
HUG NOTE READ GIRL
>>
No. 53683 ID: c80cec

walk away
>>
No. 53684 ID: f78140

>>53677
set her on fire with your mind.
>>
No. 53685 ID: 9cc8fd

Hug her and ask to read the note.
>>
No. 53686 ID: e3f578

Troll her. Wear Kamina glasses. Become King. Read Note. Rip note in front of her face.
>>
No. 53688 ID: 7eda8b

Pull her dress up over her head so she's tangled in it, then tie it in a knot.
>>
No. 53690 ID: 4553b2
File 125426488561.png - (17.56KB , 600x400 , 8.png )
53690

Take girl leave note put on Kamina glasses, got it.

Quest 8 End.
Sex Slave achieved.
>>
No. 53693 ID: 192956

>>53690
GREAT SUCESS
>>
No. 53697 ID: 4553b2
File 125426526732.png - (26.65KB , 600x400 , 9.png )
53697

There is a one eyed cat and a job interview. How do you prepare?
>>
No. 53698 ID: 476456

Demonstrate manly phisique
>>
No. 53699 ID: e3f578

Hug self, punch mirror into the other realm.
>>
No. 53700 ID: f78140

>>53697
skin cat; make fetching hat; wear hat to interview. if asked about the hat, say it's made from the last person that didn't give you a job.
>>
No. 53701 ID: c80cec

Hug self to gain self-confidence.
>>
No. 53702 ID: bffa2a

>>53697

Use manly physique to apply for male strippers job.
>>
No. 53703 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53697
Remember, you can sue for discrimination if they turn you down. Otherwise, just freshen up, explain your quality experience in the field, and chat nicely with the interviewer.
>>
No. 53704 ID: 7eda8b

Sequence break.
>>
No. 53706 ID: 632862

>>53697
Smash mirror. Cut self with shard of glass while screaming "WHYYYYYYYYY?!"
>>
No. 53707 ID: 4553b2
File 125426626997.png - (22.26KB , 600x400 , 9.png )
53707

You hug mirror self for confidence! He wishes you luck.
>>
No. 53711 ID: 4553b2
File 125426672246.png - (58.17KB , 600x400 , 9.png )
53711

You smash the mirror, and kill your mirror self. Your mirror self screams WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

Chapter 9 end.
Inhuman bastard achieved.
>>
No. 53713 ID: 053bab

>>53707
>>53711
D'awwwwwhatthefuck?!
>>
No. 53715 ID: 4553b2
File 125426706930.png - (36.92KB , 600x400 , 10.png )
53715

It is very bright. Hardly anything can be seen.
>>
No. 53716 ID: 632862

Perfect!
>>
No. 53718 ID: 632862

>>53715
Shield eyes with hand.
>>
No. 53719 ID: 45afb1

>>53715
I SEE A STRING THING! PUNCH IT!
>>
No. 53721 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53716
Mission accomplished! o/
>>
No. 53722 ID: bffa2a

Put on sunglasses. Scream YEEEEEAAAAAHHH.
>>
No. 53724 ID: 4553b2
File 125426736344.png - (74.74KB , 600x400 , 10.png )
53724

You shield your eyes with your hand and punch your head.
>>
No. 53730 ID: 4553b2
File 125426752281.png - (53.23KB , 600x400 , 10.png )
53730

YEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH

Quest 10 end

YEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH achieved.
>>
No. 53742 ID: 4553b2
File 125426789623.png - (38.67KB , 600x400 , 11.png )
53742

This is all the food left in the house! Prepare lunch for your girl.
>>
No. 53743 ID: 9cc8fd

>>53742
Make oatmeal with bananas. Supply romantic music and companion cat along with food.
>>
No. 53744 ID: 1e1932

Construct gourmet meal with duct tape.
>>
No. 53745 ID: d1210a

Fillet cat, season in garlic, fry it over a bed of oats, top with mustard, serve with root beer, don't tell her what it was until she finishes, then pull out the skin as proof.

Eat your own portion too though.
>>
No. 53746 ID: ccb486

>>53742
hey, music isn't food, it's a weapon!

use music to kill cat, butcher it into CAT MEATS

Mix garlic and mustard to make BETTER MUSTARD, coat CAT MEATS with BETTER MUSTARD. Cook for 1 hour or until golden brown.
>>
No. 53749 ID: 632862

>>53742
Mix everything together in your blender. EVERYTHING.
>>
No. 53750 ID: 1689ab

>>53742
Serve Lunch on our own naked belly. Hope our trap girlfriend finds it sexy.
>>
No. 53753 ID: 4553b2
File 125426856160.png - (20.87KB , 600x400 , 11.png )
53753

You server filleted cat on a bed of oats with better mustard on top of your naked body. Your girlfriend is surprised, disgusted, confused, and slightly aroused.

Chapter 11 end.
GREAT SUCCESS achieved.
>>
No. 53759 ID: 4553b2
File 125426941551.png - (30.54KB , 600x400 , 12.png )
53759

There is a one eyed girl. Hardly anything can be seen.
>>
No. 53761 ID: 192956

>>53759
Throw flower at the darkness
>>
No. 53762 ID: c80cec

>>53759
fall into black void.
>>
No. 53764 ID: ccb486

>>53759
flick the light on and off until OBOA appears. Hug Oboa.
>>
No. 53765 ID: e16a45

>>53759
The flower is a sunflower. Use it to shine light into the darkness.
>>
No. 53766 ID: 4553b2
File 125426974056.png - (31.13KB , 600x400 , 12.png )
53766

You use sunflower! Nothing happens.
>>
No. 53769 ID: bffa2a

>>53766

Turn your head right.
>>
No. 53770 ID: f44349

>>53766
Cast magic missle at the darkness!
>>
No. 53774 ID: 4553b2
File 125427005352.png - (35.31KB , 600x400 , 12.png )
53774

You turn your head right.
>>
No. 53775 ID: bffa2a

Open door.

Fallingman.gif
>>
No. 53776 ID: 632862

>>53774
Open door, examine hanging photo.
>>
No. 53782 ID: 4553b2
File 125427074890.gif - (74.70KB , 600x400 , 12.gif )
53782

Quest 12 End

Fallingman achieved!
>>
No. 53801 ID: af3e6d

Ohgod this is like Warioware but with quests. I love it.
>>
No. 53808 ID: 4553b2
File 125427517160.png - (21.08KB , 600x400 , 13.png )
53808

You are at the job interview. Your prospective boss asks you why you did not take the note.
>>
No. 53818 ID: c80cec

this is a job interview what are you going here you are a cat you can't even read
>>
No. 53821 ID: 43d730

>>53808
Jump on desk and assume WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY pose and sound.
Then sit down as though nothing has happened.
Repeat if he asks that question again.
>>
No. 53822 ID: af3e6d

You wanted to prove that you were good enough without having to accept help from a note.
>>
No. 53833 ID: 1689ab

>>53808
Because the note was made of delicious catfood!
>>
No. 53835 ID: 7eda8b

Read note. Hug tom.
>>
No. 53837 ID: 4553b2
File 125427612519.png - (23.41KB , 600x400 , 13.png )
53837

You assume the WRYYYYYY pose and explain that you were confident enough in your own abilities to not require the note's aid.

The cat explains that the note's aid is imperative. How do you respond?
>>
No. 53839 ID: 1689ab

"Baby, my only imparrative is LOVE"
Then uppercut the sun!
>>
No. 53845 ID: 15f6d6

READ NOTE HUG TOM
>>
No. 53847 ID: 4553b2
File 125427712678.png - (22.82KB , 600x400 , 13.png )
53847

"Baby, my only imparrative is LOVE"

Quest 13 end
Cat Seduce Fail achieved.
>>
No. 54017 ID: 4553b2
File 125428253919.png - (34.28KB , 600x400 , 14.png )
54017

There is a movie and a girl here. You can't decide what to get for lunch.
>>
No. 54022 ID: 192956

>>54017
eat movie, fuck lunch, watch girl.
>>
No. 54023 ID: 7eda8b

Take the girl to the movie and gorge yourself on popcorn.
>>
No. 54024 ID: 9cc8fd

>>54017
Cat. And don't forget to grab one of the dietary information notes off the wall there.
>>
No. 54025 ID: fb5d8e

You may eat the movie.
>>
No. 54031 ID: 4553b2
File 125428296514.png - (21.72KB , 600x400 , 14.png )
54031

You order a cat for lunch, eat the movie, fuck your lunch, and watch your girlfriend. She is surprised, disgusted, confused, and slightly aroused.

Quest 14 End
Awkward Boner achieved
>>
No. 54033 ID: 7eda8b

This is getting pretty dadaist.
>>
No. 54045 ID: 4553b2
File 125428356377.png - (5.11KB , 600x400 , 15.png )
54045

You are very dark. Hardly any of you can be seen.
>>
No. 54049 ID: b1e366

>>54045
Be eaten by a grue. It's very likely, you know.
>>
No. 54051 ID: ccb486

>>54045
cut off longer foot to achieve SYMMETRY.
>>
No. 54052 ID: e06ea4

>>54045
You can be seen all too well. Rip off an arm to lower your profile.
>>
No. 54054 ID: 4553b2
File 125428375333.png - (5.32KB , 600x400 , 15.png )
54054

You might say the probably of being eaten by a grue is 100%.

Quest 15 End

Grue discovered.
>>
No. 54064 ID: 4553b2
File 125428420362.png - (18.89KB , 600x400 , 16.png )
54064

A schoolgirl is about to explain the plot.
>>
No. 54067 ID: 9e9b47

>>54064
KISS HER
>>
No. 54071 ID: ccb486

>>54064
listen intently, because you are a completionist and that's got to be an achievement.
>>
No. 54074 ID: 6faa8c

>>54064
KISS HEEEER
>>
No. 54075 ID: 8b7db1

>>54064
Eat the plot.
>>
No. 54088 ID: 25bb78

>>54064
shalalalalalala

kees zee girl.
>>
No. 54090 ID: 1e1932

>>54064

Cunt punt.
>>
No. 54110 ID: 4553b2
File 125428598056.png - (44.31KB , 600x400 , 16.png )
54110

Plot has been eaten!

Quest 16 End

Girls Kissing Girls achieved!
>>
No. 54120 ID: 7eda8b
File 125428735634.png - (97.66KB , 500x500 , 17.png )
54120

You are a kitty. A sergal stole your awesome sword and now you just have these crappy daggers. You aren't sure what to do.
>>
No. 54124 ID: f4963f

>>54120
STARE AT SERGAL.

Nothing else. Just STARE.

He'll give it back, or die of a heart attack. Win either way.
>>
No. 54126 ID: b1e366

>>54120
Distract him in a bathhouse with your boobies, then steal it back and stab him with it
>>
No. 54129 ID: 9e9b47

>>54120

Watch him until he gives it back.

WATCH HIM PEEING
>>
No. 54132 ID: e06ea4

>>54123
Suggest staring. Staring. Staring.
>>
No. 54133 ID: 25bb78

>>54123
Post a suggestion so stupid it has to be followed!
>>
No. 54134 ID: 8b7db1

>>54120
>>54123
Stare at the kitty staring at teh sergal.
>>
No. 54157 ID: 7eda8b
File 12542886469.png - (84.51KB , 500x500 , 17.png )
54157

You stare at the sergal while he pees, only he can't pee while you're watching him. Eventually, he gives your sword back to make you stop doing that.

Quest 17 End

1,390 Sword Points

0 Sergals Killed
>>
No. 54158 ID: 25bb78

Okay, I'm confused... Reaver and Gnomu both deleted their posts?

This isn't going to make much sense in retrospect.
>>
No. 54203 ID: 7eda8b
File 12542918974.png - (67.52KB , 500x500 , 17.png )
54203

You stare at Gnome while he draws, only he can't draw while you're watching him. Eventually he lets you use his computer to make you stop.

Quest 17 BONUS END

Acquired:

Secret Apocalyption plot notes

3x Team Fortress 2 Scout Achievements

4x Team Fortress 2 Spy Achievements

A one week ban from Lolcats for uploading pictures with no captions

An entry called 'How to kill someone with your bare hands'
>>
No. 54268 ID: 39901c

Gnome, I love you.
>>
No. 54469 ID: e98c4f

This made me lol so much.
>>
No. 54610 ID: 6756f8

Gnome you are my favorite Gnome.
>>
No. 54613 ID: 43d730

>>54203
Which achievements, out of curiosity?
>>
No. 54739 ID: 7eda8b

>>54613
Triple Play
Dodgers 1, Giants 0
First Blood
High Value Target
May I Cut In?
Triplecrossed
You Only Shiv Thrice
>>
No. 55396 ID: 4553b2
File 125445802223.png - (67.21KB , 600x400 , 18.png )
55396

The floor is made of lava, and you need to pee!
>>
No. 55401 ID: c80cec

>>55396
pee into lava, but aim far enough away that the steam wont burn you.
>>
No. 55402 ID: 9e9b47

>>55396

Pee out window.
>>
No. 55404 ID: 632862

>>55396
Drink your own pee.
>>
No. 55406 ID: ccb486

>>55396
throw the furniture to the floor and use it as footsteps!
>>
No. 55407 ID: 6faa8c

>>55396
WINDOWPEE
>>
No. 55408 ID: cd08c0

>>55396
Hold it until you explode!
>>
No. 55409 ID: bd2eec

>>55396
FUCK FUCK OH MAN

Keep your legs on the chair, grab edges and hop over to carpet. Open your dresser and throw clothes on the floor to make a landbridge to the bathroom.
>>
No. 55410 ID: 1689ab

Jump off of chair onto rug. Surf into bathroom with style.
>>
No. 55414 ID: 4553b2
File 125445838088.png - (67.65KB , 600x400 , 18.png )
55414

Quest 18 end.

Unsuspecting bystander achieved!
>>
No. 55415 ID: a7ef8c

piss on your socks and run to the bathroom chronicles of riddick style.
>>
No. 55427 ID: 4553b2
File 125445881856.png - (60.75KB , 600x400 , 19.png )
55427

A loli is firing bullets at you!

Blue goes clockwise, pink goes counterclockwise, green is heading for your current position, but does not home.
>>
No. 55428 ID: 9e9b47

>>55427

Die
>>
No. 55429 ID: 476456

move 10 pixels forward and hold perfectly still.
>>
No. 55431 ID: e06ea4

>>55427
Lick blue.
>>
No. 55433 ID: fb5d8e

Confess love to loli.
>>
No. 55434 ID: ed8d8a

Gain altitude! Leave the 2D plane of the bullets.
>>
No. 55435 ID: 7eda8b

Die.
>>
No. 55436 ID: dd1710

>>55427
turn off the shitty video game and go play something good
>>
No. 55437 ID: cd08c0

>>55427
KISS THE LOLI
>>
No. 55438 ID: 1689ab

Use your DECEPTIVLY SMALL HITBOX to easilly weave through the bullet hell and proceed to HUG LOLI
>>
No. 55439 ID: f4963f

>>55427
She can't kill you! Kill yourself first!

That'll show her!
>>
No. 55441 ID: 4553b2
File 125445916252.png - (44.68KB , 600x400 , 19.png )
55441

You confess your undying love to the loli!

She begins to weep as the bullets shred you apart.

Quest 19 end
Tragedy achieved
>>
No. 55457 ID: 4553b2
File 125445974267.png - (32.64KB , 600x400 , 20.png )
55457

A kobold has challened you to a game of wits!
>>
No. 55459 ID: e06ea4

>>55457
Sure. Play chess.
>>
No. 55461 ID: 9e9b47

>>55457

Have the dwarf jump him!
>>
No. 55464 ID: 7eda8b

Challenge him to a game of "Whose laser eyes are stronger?"
>>
No. 55466 ID: cd08c0

>>55457
Turn him into a pumpkin.
>>
No. 55468 ID: b1e366

Challenge him to a game of "Whose laser eyes are str- PUMPKIIIIIINNNNNNNNS~
>>
No. 55479 ID: 1689ab

Say sure. Then kill him. Guess he wasnt witty enough to figure that one out, aye?
>>
No. 55482 ID: 4553b2
File 125446051694.png - (34.58KB , 600x400 , 20.png )
55482

Pumpkiiiiinnnnnssssssssssssssss~

Quest 20 end.

Pumpkin Pie achieved.
>>
No. 55483 ID: 8b7db1

>>55457
Play a mill deck.

...oh, wait GAME of Wits, not BATTLE of Wits. My bad.
>>
No. 55496 ID: b1e366
File 125446122414.png - (51.62KB , 800x600 , interrupted.png )
55496

You decided to tap Gnome in the head so he can't concentrate on making Quests, but what now?
>>
No. 55500 ID: d1210a

>>55496
THREE STOOGES EYE POKES FOR EVERYONE
>>
No. 55506 ID: 1689ab

Reveal that you're actually a lion.
>>
No. 55509 ID: 45afb1

>>55496
Tap him even more. Hes so short and tapable!
>>
No. 55513 ID: aba0a3

Take off your people suit and constrict him in your shadowy black furry form of death.
>>
No. 55529 ID: b1e366
File 125446194042.png - (99.13KB , 800x600 , ohshietc.png )
55529

You burst out of your stolen human skin and leap upon the unsuspecting Gnome. He is delicious.

DIDN'T GET TO THE CAR IN TIME achieved.
>>
No. 55536 ID: 1689ab

Jesus Fucking Christ!
>>
No. 55561 ID: aba0a3
File 125446331428.png - (52.87KB , 800x600 , insomnia.png )
55561

You are tired, you need to go to bed. You have a mountain dew, a backpack, and a bed.
>>
No. 55564 ID: 1689ab

Go to bed, silly. Sleeping is conductive to health, and if you don't have your health, what have you got?
>>
No. 55571 ID: 4553b2

>>55564
mountain dew, a backpack, and a bed.

Go to bed.
>>
No. 55573 ID: 632862

>>55561
Crawl into backpack and sleep.
>>
No. 55574 ID: 9e9b47

>>55561

Sleep the sleep of your people.
>>
No. 55576 ID: f21281

>>55561
Fuck Dew, Marry Bed, Kill Backpack
>>
No. 55579 ID: aba0a3
File 125446398131.png - (31.88KB , 800x600 , GOTINTHEBED.png )
55579

Alright, so I got in the bed, but it doesn't seem to be getting anywhere.
>>
No. 55582 ID: e06ea4

>>55579
Tail in ear, because you can!

Resume plotting to destroy Gnome.
>>
No. 55585 ID: ccb486

>>55579
masturbate to clearly erotic poster.
>>
No. 55586 ID: 9e9b47

>>55579

Second panel with no end?

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG
>>
No. 55589 ID: 632862

>>55579
Hold your breath until you pass out. This will not kill you, as your body will automatically begin breathing again.

SCIENCE!
>>
No. 55591 ID: 1689ab

Close your eyes and pretend to be asleep. Relax your breathing and systematicly move through each muscle in your body making sure that each of them is as relaxed as you can make them.
>>
No. 55592 ID: aba0a3
File 125446477191.png - (36.29KB , 800x600 , awwrightunfunf.png )
55592

I masturbate to plots of destroying Gnome.

Gnome loves it.

I love it.

I fall asleep shortly after!

Chapter 22 end.

NOSTALGIC TAKEOVER achieved.
NAUGHTY BASTARDS achieved.
NOCTURNAL EMISSION achieved.
>>
No. 55628 ID: 18212a
File 125447417068.gif - (10.11KB , 640x400 , nemesis.gif )
55628

I face my arch nemesis.

I am in my toolshed, with all manner of equipment.

How should I exact revenge?
>>
No. 55629 ID: 476456

Full on headbutt.
>>
No. 55630 ID: 18212a
File 125447497922.gif - (14.12KB , 640x400 , nemesisend.gif )
55630

>>55629
TAKE THAT YOU BITCH!

QUEST 23 END.

GLASSFACE END ACHIEVED.
ANGRY ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED.
>>
No. 55658 ID: 6756f8
File 125450777068.png - (12.12KB , 600x600 , Space pirate.png )
55658

You are a space pirate. What do you do?
>>
No. 55661 ID: 632862

>>55658
Install minor constrictions in all morph-ball size tubes.
>>
No. 55662 ID: 2dd482

>>55658
raid a ship crewed by a catgirl, a sheepgirl, a cuteboldgirl, and a girl missing an eye and her tongue.
>>
No. 55664 ID: 45afb1

>>55661
>in all morph-ball size tubes.
>morph-ball size tubes.
>tubes.

TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBES!
>>
No. 55667 ID: e75a2f

TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBES!!!!
>>
No. 55668 ID: 2cbe3e

>>55658

Get a real job, find a good wife, settle down and have kids. Leave life of piracy behind.
>>
No. 55669 ID: 7d87d9

>>55661
THIS! Then make armor out of tubes
>>
No. 55677 ID: 748287

Sing a charming space-sea shanty.
>>
No. 55691 ID: 6756f8
File 125451283817.png - (27.74KB , 600x600 , ihaventreadjenquest.png )
55691

>>55661
>>55662
>>55664
>>55669

You decide to multitask. You build TUUUUUUBEarmor, hijack said ship, fill it with tubes, and put some constrictions in the tubes to fuck Samus over.

MULTITASKING END

TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBES ARMOR ACQUIRED

SAMUS IS FUCKED ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBES ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
WHY THE FUCK DID MY INTERNET SHIT OUT ON ME RIGHT WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO POST THIS ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
>>
No. 56850 ID: f98e0b
File 125467180622.png - (23.13KB , 800x600 , hurr.png )
56850

You are a chaotic good drow outcast with two scimitars whose mission is to redeem his wicked heritage!
>>
No. 56851 ID: 18212a

>>56850
Make out with your sister.
>>
No. 56853 ID: 43d730

>>56850
Make out with your best friend's girl.

...who is your sister.

While he's stuck somewhere.

Feel no moral qualms about this, just ANGST.
>>
No. 56855 ID: f98e0b
File 125467254316.png - (17.76KB , 800x600 , durr.png )
56855

You don't have a sister. You have a big cat though.

You try to make out with it and it eats your head.

GOOD END ACHIEVED
CAT DEFEATED WILD GARY STU
CAT HAS GAINED A LEVEL!
>>
No. 56866 ID: b1e366
File 125467555930.png - (11.83KB , 800x600 , 1.png )
56866

You are a HERBIVOROUS BUNNY GIRL trapped in an underwater research facility with a ONE-EYED CAT.

What do you do?
>>
No. 56868 ID: d99784

>>56866
Look for those fabled hidden cameras.
>>
No. 56869 ID: 1689ab

Take no shit! PUNCH EVERYTHING!
>>
No. 56871 ID: e3f578

Hug Note, Read Tom with third eye and others closed.
>>
No. 56876 ID: 43d730

>>56866
Find TARP.
Have HOT RABBIT SEX under TARP to foil CAMERAS.
>>
No. 56878 ID: b1e366
File 125467651286.png - (12.42KB , 800x600 , 2.png )
56878

>>56869
You punch the SHIT out of Tom!
Tom is confused and feels betrayed.

RABBIT PUNCH achieved.
>>
No. 56880 ID: 5ba271

Cunt punt
>>
No. 56881 ID: d99784

>>56878
Kick him in the groin! Pull his hair! Twist his nipples! Poke him in the eye!
>>
No. 56890 ID: 4d26aa
File 125467861410.png - (18.95KB , 600x600 , line.png )
56890

You are stuck in an absurdly long line. This angers you. Wat u do?
>>
No. 56891 ID: 5ba271

Dick kick
>>
No. 56892 ID: 43d730

>>56890
Frottage the person in front of you, while snapping your fingers and humming a Vengaboys song.
>>
No. 56893 ID: 632862

Start a conga line. That should get people moving.
>>
No. 56902 ID: 4d26aa
File 125467941358.png - (20.19KB , 600x600 , Conga.png )
56902

Why, this is much more entertaining! The wait will feel like no time at all, now!

CONGA LINE ACQUIRED
GROINKICK END ACHIEVED

Xom is amused.
>>
No. 60284 ID: 1c48f4
File 125497157989.jpg - (175.53KB , 640x480 , drawanmyocdonotstele.jpg )
60284

You are a PATHETIC NERD who spends every waking hour on your computer browsing threads on forums no one has ever heard of.

You've stumbled upon a quest thread wherein the forum's denizens are posting extremely short quests. Using your MOUSE you crudely form your original character posing the question "WHat Silly Hat Should I Wear????" in MS PAINT.

Some totally random suggestions include "top hat", "muffin", and "the letter W".

There is no doubt in your mind; the community is on the edge of its seat. What do you do?
>>
No. 60286 ID: 09d188

>>60284
A muffin shaped like a W on top of a top hat!
>>
No. 60287 ID: 9cc8fd

>>60284
A big poofy muffin-shaped hat with a W on it. The community will go nuts. Bonus points if you use Wario colors.
>>
No. 60299 ID: af3e6d

>>60284
A hat made of the scraps of material left over when every hat in existence was ever made.
>>
No. 60340 ID: 1c48f4
File 125497819849.gif - (90.90KB , 640x480 , drawanmyocdonotstele2.gif )
60340

As the final stroke is drawn there is no doubt in your mind - it is perfect...

(ANIMATED)

Epilogue:

Achievement earned: Mother's Reassurances!
Achievement earned: Tears as Masturbatory Lube!
>>
No. 60393 ID: 18212a

>>60340
Oh man. Priceless.
>>
No. 60403 ID: f4963f
File 125502035531.jpg - (109.14KB , 800x600 , BoobieQuest_1.jpg )
60403

You are a BLUE-FOOTED BOOBIE. You are extremely disturbed by the lack of BOOBIES on /quest/. What do you do?
>>
No. 60404 ID: fb5d8e

>>60403
Develop a footfetish
>>
No. 60405 ID: 8ca61a

Drink until you see boobies.
>>
No. 60408 ID: f4963f
File 125502124769.jpg - (110.95KB , 800x600 , BoobieQuest_2.jpg )
60408

>>60404
This is so much easier to deal with!

BOOBIEFOOT FETISH ACHIEVED!
AUTOEROTICISM ACHIEVED!
>>
No. 60684 ID: b1e366
File 125503743517.png - (8.21KB , 800x600 , 3.png )
60684

There is delicious cake here, but it is on the end of a deadly obstacle course. What do you do?
>>
No. 60687 ID: 7eda8b

Leave and purchase your own cake using money.
>>
No. 60696 ID: f44349

>>60684
1 Realise the screen loops
2 Walk left.
3 Climb wall.
4 ????
5 CAEK
>>
No. 60697 ID: b1e366
File 12550377075.png - (7.94KB , 800x600 , 4.png )
60697

>>60687
You leave. Cake isn't worth this bullshit. You buy some at a store, it's pretty good.

QUITTERS NEVER WIN, BUT THEY ALSO DON'T DIE HORRIBLY achieved.
UR MR RATIONAL achieved.
>>
No. 60699 ID: 836eb8

Aww... I wanted to be the guy...
>>
No. 60712 ID: 18212a
File 125503793650.png - (13.86KB , 800x600 , shortquest.png )
60712

There is delicious cake here, but it is on the end of a deadly obstacle course. What do you do?
>>
No. 60713 ID: 135d9a

Use the portal gun!

In a stupid way that doesn't actually solve the problem, no less!
>>
No. 60721 ID: 6faa8c

>>60713
above and below WHEEEE
>>
No. 60722 ID: f44349

>>60712
1. Shoot one portal above you
2. and one below you
3. ????
4. VICTOLY
>>
No. 60769 ID: 1689ab

BE THE GUY. BEST FRUIT, SPIKE AND MOON!
>>
No. 60788 ID: 84ae51

Start a miniquest on a community quest thread and don't update it for an hour, thereby locking anyone else out of doing one.
>>
No. 60819 ID: 18212a
File 125504346586.png - (36.11KB , 800x600 , quest.png )
60819

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE


>Terminal velocity achieved.
[was guilt-tripped into doing something else, sorry]
>>
No. 60897 ID: b1e366
File 125504847912.png - (9.52KB , 800x600 , 5.png )
60897

IT IS TIME.
>>
No. 60900 ID: 9cc8fd

But can you overcome her? FOOL
>>
No. 60904 ID: b1e366
File 125504903163.png - (9.77KB , 800x600 , 6.png )
60904

>>60900
*sob*

INCONSIDERATE TO THE INANIMATE achieved.
>>
No. 60905 ID: 1689ab

What? but... aww... come on... five more minutes...
>>
No. 60917 ID: 45afb1
File 125505041555.png - (6.13KB , 272x306 , Short Quest 1.png )
60917

You don't feel like doing anything right now.
>>
No. 60920 ID: 43d730

>>60917
Nap.
Then binge on really bad webcomics.
Then make some curry with whatever you have on hand.
>>
No. 60921 ID: 1689ab

Thats no attitude to have! FUCK THAT SHIT! DO EVERYTHING! BREAK FREE OF THIS MALASE AND SHOW THE UNIVERSE WHAT YOUR MADE OF! YOURS IS THE PASSION THAT WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS!
>>
No. 60922 ID: e06ea4

Nyah~ http://www.onemanga.com/Chiis_Sweet_Home/1/00-cover/
>>
No. 60923 ID: aa1163

>>60917
Then don't.
>>
No. 60930 ID: 45afb1
File 125505134965.png - (6.54KB , 272x306 , Short Quest 2.png )
60930

>>60920
>>60921
>>60923
>>60922
You decide to read strange new comic with bored kitty while watching Gurren Lagann again and eat a bowl of ramen. You continue to ignore your unupdated quests.

IGNORANCE achieved
RAMEN achieved
KAMINA achieve
MULTI-TASK achieved
SHORT QUEST MEME achieved
>>
No. 60933 ID: b94893
File 125505158657.png - (146.65KB , 960x540 , FOREST OF DICKS.png )
60933

YOU ARE CUTEVREAN NOT-HATCH CAUGHT IN A LOVE RECTANGLE BETWEEN CUTELORHKE NOT-TAV, CUTELYXIAN NOT-SHADRAN AND CUTEDAHL NOT-VEN.

YOUR NOSE IS BLEEDING AND YOU ARE STUCK IN THE GLOWING BLUE DICK FOREST.

WHAT WILL YOU DO?
>>
No. 60938 ID: ee0a11

>>60933

KILL YOURSELF.
>>
No. 60939 ID: 7d87d9

>>60933
Be super Kawaii and try to find Not-Rain and kick her in the knee
>>
No. 60941 ID: 9cc8fd

>>60933
Invite them all over for STRIP NOT-POKER.
>>
No. 60946 ID: 1689ab

PUNCH EVERYTHING
>>
No. 60947 ID: 7eda8b
File 125505213159.png - (43.40KB , 450x450 , suggestion.png )
60947

Arm grenade.

Consume grenade.
>>
No. 60960 ID: b94893
File 125505306893.png - (147.54KB , 960x540 , FOREST OF DICKS2.png )
60960

>>60938
>>60947
YOU EAT A GRENADE

IT IS DELICIOUS AND HAS NO CONSEQUENCES WHAT SO EVER

QUEST END
12 OF 63 SECRETS FOUND
15 ENEMIES KILLED
5 SUITORS WOOED
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: TOP KURT COBAIN
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: NOT A PINE CONE
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: CONFETTI
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: DOWNY SOFT
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: SPEED DEMON
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: STIFF KNEES
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: STALE MOVES
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: NO R 4 U
>>
No. 60963 ID: 135d9a
File 125505316288.png - (5.37KB , 600x400 , shortquest1.png )
60963

You are A GUY, I guess?

And you're on the MOON or something but that's not important.

There is a BAG OF CASH? here.

What do you do?
>>
No. 60966 ID: a7ef8c

explode due to the vacuum of space
>>
No. 60969 ID: aa1163

>>60963
Buy a rocket and survey your new kingdom. Moon kingdom.
>>
No. 60970 ID: 45afb1

>>60963
Blow it up to see if there's water! This makes perfect sense!
>>
No. 60971 ID: 9cc8fd

>>60966
Well not explode so much as have the air in your lungs violently wrested from you and soon lose consciousness.

Unless this isn't the moon. Then grab maybe-cash!
>>
No. 60973 ID: 7eda8b

Asphyxiate
>>
No. 60976 ID: 135d9a
File 12550536535.png - (5.58KB , 600x400 , shortquest2.png )
60976

>die of space

You try really hard but you can't seem to make yourself not breathe enough to die!

Maybe this isn't the moon.
>>
No. 60977 ID: 43d730

>>60963
YOU ARE ON THE MOON
IT IS VERY COLD AND YOU WILL DIE SHORTLY
>>
No. 60980 ID: 9cc8fd

>>60976
YOU ARE ON THE MOON
IT IS VERY COLD AND YOU WILL DIE SHORTLY
>>
No. 60981 ID: 895b3e

>>60976
then knock down that background! you must reveal this lunar landing as the hoax it is!
>>
No. 60989 ID: 43d730

>>60922
My eyes exploded from the diabetes I contracted.
>>
No. 60993 ID: 135d9a
File 125505458762.png - (4.64KB , 600x400 , shortquest3.png )
60993

You try to act a second time, but suddenly SCIENTISTS BLOW UP THE MOON-THING. FOR SCIENCE.

0 of 1 GIANT BAGS OF NOT CASH picked up
UNREALISTIC EXPLOSION achieved
POORLY EXECUTED REFERENCE TO RECENT NEWS achieved
COP-OUT ENDING achieved
RAN TOO LONG achieved
SUICIDE FAIL achieved
ARR, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOIN' achieved
THIS DIDN'T WORK OUT SO WELL achieved :(
WE BLEW UP THE WATER achieved
>>
No. 65305 ID: 4553b2
File 125571750772.png - (27.03KB , 600x400 , 36.png )
65305

A loli is firing bullets at you!
>>
No. 65307 ID: 954933

>>65305
HUG ERI
>>
No. 65308 ID: de6a2d

>>65305
Die horribly to make her feel bad and realize that she is teh dem0nz.
>>
No. 65309 ID: 43d730

>>65305
Dodge, or use a BOMB to take all the shots off the screen.
Continue firing, have tea after.
>>
No. 65310 ID: 6550ad

There's only one possible thing to do:

Fire lolis at the bullets!
>>
No. 65312 ID: c1b520

>>65305
Step in the path of those bullets, have dramatic death scene, make her feel sorry for killing people, have last minute sex before horrible death.
>>
No. 65313 ID: 4553b2
File 125571822690.png - (37.30KB , 600x400 , 36.png )
65313

You dive in the way and suffer a dramatic death!
>>
No. 65315 ID: 4553b2
File 125571825987.png - (40.17KB , 600x400 , 36.png )
65315

You attempt to elicit last minute make up sex, but lolis care not for boxmen.

BEWARE THE CUTE ONES achieved!
>>
No. 65316 ID: c1b520

>>65315
NOOOOoooooo...
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