Hal 2012/12/29(Sat)22:51 No. 481133 ID: 0eef61
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Greetings, my simian subconscious. You've kind of caught me at an awkward time.

That? Oh, no. That's not me. My dress sense, I like to think, is a good few tiers above the desert drifter rags this guy's rocking. No, that's a space pirate, and not the romantic, dashing kind.

Well, he's dashing, but... you know. Not my kind of dashing.

He slams into a cart pulled by one of the insectoid natives of this dustbowl (What are they called again? Dreimians.) and topples it onto its side. It spills unappealing orange mushy stuff all over the ground.

Hal 2012/12/29(Sat)22:51 No. 481134 ID: 0eef61
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That is me. ๒ยאק๏ค, but you can just call me Halaris. Hal, to my friends.

The big handsome tripod guy, not the little yellow one.

That pirate is carrying with him the news that this whole town is now against him, most likely to his pirate buddies, who are all armed with weapons that make the Dreimians' slugthrowers look like peashooters.

Fortunately in this bright and enlightened future, violent death has been more or less eradicated with the advent of the Respawner, which can reconstitute its user from the moment before a fatal injury with nothing more than a nasty headache and a blow to the pride.

Unfortunately the townsfolk of this particular planet have no respawners, and the pirates do. They also have firepower enough to wipe out every Dreimian on this hemisphere. So if they decide to pay back this betrayal with some good old Revenge Killings, it's not going to be easy to wipe the blood of a massacre off my claws.

So here I am, Offical(ish) Emissary of the Alliance, sprinting out of my meeting with the town leaders to chase this guy down.

Hal 2012/12/29(Sat)22:52 No. 481135 ID: 0eef61
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Talia, my Delter De Milo (and bodyguard), pushes past a stunned civilian and levels her rifle at the retreating pirate.
"I'mma charbroil this dipstick," she announces.

It comes to me that firing an automatic laser weapon in the middle of the civvy-filled town square facing the governing building of a potential ally is not the best diplomatic move.
Also if Talia kills him and his buddies have a respawner she's just bought him a one-way trip right back to home base.

Hal 2012/12/29(Sat)22:53 No. 481136 ID: 0eef61
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"Firing an automatic laser weapon in the middle of the civvy-filled town square facing the governing building of a potential ally is not the best diplomatic move," Anka Pribicevic, my other bodyguard calls from the balcony she's jump-jetted up to. "And if his buddies have a respawner you've just bought him a one way trip right back to home base!"

Forward thinker, that Anka.

"So what do we do?" asks Talia, not lowering her gun.

"Chase him into an alley or something," calls Anka, "then shoot him! I'll track him from the rooftops!"

"I can get him now, Hal," Talia tells me as the perp nears an alleyway. "Call the shot."

If you can do it quickly and without risking collateral, this seems like the time for some [Delter Diplomacy] with your laser pistol, pain should slow em down and make it easy for Talia and Anka to close in. Otherwise, we need to grab our guide (who hopefully knows their way around) on our chase, and trap the target.

Aim to cripple. Burn off his legs or something.

If the shot's clear, scorch his feet.

>>481138
Seconding this course of action.

>>481138
Foolish! Use your laserpistol to shoot off one of his legs. If you can prevent instantaneous exsangunation, it'll easily prevent him from escaping.

Oh, and make sure to check for Suicide Pills in his mouth and fingernails. They're a real bugger in this situation, and Capn Killcrazy might be annoyed with us if we fail to prevent the levelling of this city.

>>481136
I agree with the girl who agrees with you. Don't let your relationship with Talia cloud your judgement.

Hal 2012/12/30(Sun)22:10 No. 481383 ID: 0eef61
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Before anyone can say anything I let fire with a searing beam of [Delter Diplomacy] at his legs.

Aaand I miss by a good foot or so. Oops.

Talia cusses aloud as we sprint after the retreating Delter. "Dammit, Hal, why didn't you let me take the shot?" she says. "I had him."

We hit the alleyway and unload at the pirate, but he manages to be where concentrated lances of radiant death are not. I hear Anka boost off the railing behind us as we pursue.

Hal 2012/12/30(Sun)22:10 No. 481384 ID: 0eef61
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"Diminai," I summon my Dreimian guide and court representative to spring into action. "You know the area! Come on! We have to trap this guy!"

There is a distinct lack of springing into action from behind me. I look back to see the Dreimian standing in the doorway of the courthouse, frozen with fear.

Oh, right. She's probably never seen any kind of gun going off, let alone a laser. I forgot how unwilling mortals can get to charge into life-threatening situations.

If I'm going to snap her out of it and get her to come with us I need to be fast. We have to gain ground on Penzance over there.

Well you're probably wimpy enough to slap her out of it without really hurting her. I think using charm would take too much time.

You don't have to slap her in the FACE though.

>>481393
That is literally the worst suggestion ever. Instead I suggest we send Anka and Whatsherface after him, while we charm the native out of her shellshock and into helping us cut off the pirate.

>>481396
Oh god, I think I've figured it out, are you Seven?

Tell Talia and Anka to follow the pirate while you dash back to Diminai, then either snap her out of the shock by talking or just grab her under one arm and start running after your bodyguards while explaining the situation to Diminai.

no slapping the ladies! be all charming and shit. maybe grab her and shake her, remind her of what's at stake here- the fate of her and all her people. it's time to be a hero goddammit, so she'd do well to snap the fuck out of it.

>>481398
What? No.
Also, using charm when you're actively chasing somebody is just dumb.

Do you have any orbital assets that can make craters? Or, even better, does the pirate THINK you have some?
If so, then keeping up with him will have him avoid his base of operations - if you're willing to open fire in a crowded street to stop HIM then you're probably willing to turn their building into glasswork modern art. He'll keep running until he's shaken you, and you can wear him out.

If not? Run faster.

As far as your guide goes? "Shock later, help now!"

>>481398
What? I'm not Seven. I'm just some guy who switches tags on the fly. Assaulting a lady is rarely the answer.

Hal 2013/01/01(Tue)00:21 No. 481663 ID: 0eef61
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"Chase him down! Go for the legs but don't kill him!" I yell at Anka as she rockets over my head. "I'll catch up, see if I can't cut him off!"

"Diminai," I grab her arm as [charm]ingly as I can manage and pull her toward the alleyway. "I need you, honey. We have to save the world. Come on."

"Diamanda," she says.
"What?"
"I'm Diamanda."
"Sorry. Diamanda." These friggin' Dreimian names. "Please: Shock later, help now. We gotta catch up with this guy and you're our only advantage. Please."

She stops pulling and starts running with me. She's not trained for any of this, but I guess these little ant people are braver than they look.

Choose Route Hal 2013/01/01(Tue)00:22 No. 481664 ID: 0eef61
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"Okay. Uhhhhhh." Diamanda tries to think through the cloud of adrenaline.

"He's headed for the old leatherworkers," I urge her. "How do we get between them?"

"Through the alley on the other side of the square we can cut through the Watuskin pens and cut him off." she tells me. "Or the rooftops. There's a way up down the alley."

If I take the alleys I'll catch up with him faster but he'll easily see me coming and it won't be much of a flank.

Along the rooftops I've got a better shot and the element of surprise, but there's not a lot of cover and we won't be as quick.

Rooftops. It's your best shot at pinning him down.

>>481664
Through the Watuskin pens. Ambush is the best otion.

>>481664
Through the Watuskin pens. Ambush is the best otion.

>>481664
Through the Watuskin pens. Ambush is the best otion.

>>481666
Triple post aside, I vote for the alleyway as well

>>481670
Yeah, sorry about that. I glitched out, and for some reason the delete button has failed me.

What's a Watuskin?

Rooftop so we can surprise him.

>>481664
You're not trying to flank him, you're trying to cut him off and delay so your sniper can get in position.
Alleyways.

>>481663
...you're grabbing her hand with one leg, holding the pistol with another... are you running on one leg?

>>481678

a leg and a massive shlong.

rooftops. you probably need a better shooting position and those long spindly legs of yours look like they're good for climbing.

Alleyway. We're the distraction, not the ambushers.

Hal 2013/01/02(Wed)19:55 No. 481928 ID: 0eef61
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>>481678
As soon as I know she's with me I let go of her hand. While I can hop with the best of them there's no shame in a little steadiness.

>>481671
A watuskin? One of these blobby cow things the Dreimians use for food. They dot the fields in this bit of town, munching evenly on whatever Faro grass is called.
The scene would be idyllic if I couldn't hear the chattering of Anka's MG in the distance, punctuated by the crack-thoom noise of someone firing an antimatter rifle.

Someone startles me by announcing right into my ear, "This is Belding to Halaris." Where did that come from? Oh, right, I've got a wire. "Your squad's weapons are reading hot. What's going on there?"

"There's a pirate runner trying to get to the garrison in town," I vault another watuskin. "We're in hot pursuit. How's your day going?"

"We're on the outskirts of the pirate bush camp in the sticks," Belding says. "The Captain was waiting for the negotiations to finish before we moved."
"Wellll, I'd call a footrace a good close to any negotiation." I check on Diamanda. She's a little behind me, but it seems like we're going the right way, if your definition of "The right way" is into a running firefight like mine is.

"Just don't kill any locals," Belding tells me. I can't ever read this guy. "And Halaris: from our observations of the bigger camp it seems like these guys do have at least one respawner, so a less-than-lethal approach is ideal. Any man you kill will reinforce the garrison either here or in town."
I hear someone yell a muffled something at Belding.

"And the captain says 'Hi'," he says. "Good luck, Halaris."

Hal 2013/01/02(Wed)19:55 No. 481929 ID: 0eef61
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I'm about to reply when we break out of the fields back into the streets and I see the perp dash out from behind cover right in front of me.

I snap off a shot and haul carapace to cover, some kind of well in the middle of the street. Diamanda leaps for the well just in time, as the pirate responds to my entrance on the scene with three piping hot lasers of death.

Anka's on the rooftops and as soon as I flush the pirate out of cover she brings her MG to bear on him, rattling a tracking burst off that kicks the dust up around his feet. I think I can make out the characteristic sizzle-pop of a wounded Delter; she might have clipped him with one.

A shirm pops out from cover behind a high-up wall and fires at Anka in return. This is the guy with the antimatter rifle; a few feet to the side and not even Anka's power armor would have kept her safe. Those things take a while to charge up but they can punch through just about any armor.

Behind me, Talia yells "Friendlies!" then, "Dammit, why did you bring a bug into the middle of this?"

Reference Suggestion 2013/01/02(Wed)19:55 No. 481930 ID: 0eef61
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Hal's inventory is:
A laser pistol//
[Cloak Draw]: Hal pulls his weapon from within his cloak with lightning speed born of obsessive practice and viewing of old Human westerns. Lets him get the drop on enemies.
[Delter Diplomacy]: So named for the Delter's lack of social graces. Hal can turn down the setting on the pistol to give nasty burns and painful blisters instead of more severe wounds. Useful in intimidation or interrogation.
[Beam Intensifier]: Does the exact opposite. Hal supercharges his weapon's strength to crave through armor, cover, and flesh, but also nearly overheats it, disabling it for a few seconds.
[Limit Break]: Do not use Limit Break.

An Automatic pistol//
[Bullet Hell]: Can only be used behind cover. Hal buckles down, steadies his aim on his cover and with both hands and empties the clip at whatever he's firing at. Destructive if profoundly wasteful.
[Switch Firing Mode]: Hal can cycle between Full Auto and semi-automatic. The latter is more accurate and less damaging.
[Blindfire]: Can only be used behind cover. Hal fires his automatic blindly, giving a chance of hitting any enemies in the open in front of him and suppressing any enemies behind cover. Wildly inaccurate but Hal doesn't have to leave cover to use it.
[Gun Kata]: Hal has worked a long time with the ergonomic handguns of humanity. He can enter a state of heightened speed where he can use his handgun like a melee weapon. His attack rolls can use either his Other Melee skill or Handguns skill, whichever skill is better. His attacks are unblockable. Hal can also use the Gun Kata to gain the equivalent of full cover if out in the open. The Gun Kata can be used only once per battle and lasts for two turns. Hal is exhausted for one turn upon completing it and can move or act at half speed.

Talia's stats and abilities are currently unknown but Hal can give her orders. Her inventory is:

A laser rifle
Jump Jets
A fragmentation grenade
Medium armor

Anka's stats and abilities are currently unknown but Hal can give her orders. Her inventory is:

A SAW
Jump Jets
Powered armor

All members of Halaris' retinue also have a capsule of fast-acting poison in their back teeth they can bite to induce brain death in seconds, in the event of capture.

>>481930
Priority one is capturing the fleeing pirate. Losses are acceptable so long as we keep the civvie safe and bring back the pirate. I'm not sure what to make of the AM Rifle dude... but he's a very large threat.

Anyway. The pirate is about to enter cover so use Beam Intensifier to shoot him despite his being behind it. Or if you have a chance, sweep his legs with it while he's still out of cover.

What I don't get is, why didn't he just shoot himself, if he's got a gun and would respawn at the garrison? Fear of death despite the respawner? We need to disarm him too if we manage to take him down.

Tell Anka to focus on AM Rifle dude and cover Talia while she moves up. When Talia is with us we can encircle the running pirate and hopefully take him down non-lethally.

And yeah try shooting through the cover with the Intensifier, keep the pressure on him.

Hal 2013/01/03(Thu)11:44 No. 482011 ID: 0eef61
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"He ducked in there and came out with a gun," Talia tells me as the antimatter rifle's boom echoes off the walls. She gestures toward the red-curtained doorway. "There might be someone inside!"

"Anka! Lock the rifle down!" I power up the pistol, turning the intensifier dial nearly to the red. "Talia, move up!"

Anka moves to the other end of her rooftop and aims at the parapet. Her chopper lights up again and lets loose an impressive amount of lead into the shirm's position, forcing his head down. I hope that wasn't any sort of historical edifice.

Talia sprints to the next building and fires a shot off at the retreating pirate, whose blood is now sizzling and melting his robes as he runs. She gestures at the red-curtained entrance. He's forced into cover behind the tower entrance, firing a shot off in my direction that's close enough for me to feel the heat on my face.

Cute.

I return fire with an intensified beam, which punches straight through his cover and, in short order, his shoulder. His distressed vocal response tells me there's not much fight left in him.

Tell the pirates to drop their weapons, who knows maybe they will do it.

But if they won't drop their weapons
grab Diminai and move against the wall behind Talia, ask for Talias Frag grenade and then tell her to advance on the wounded pirate.
Meanwhile we investigate the house with the curtain door. Very carefully.

why would you even enter a random house in the middle of a firefight

I think it will be enough if we made sure nobody would die if they came out of the building i.e. cutting the lead exchange between Talia and the wounded guy to an absolute minimum

I'm more concerned about that guy firing at Anka, and not just because he could put her out of the game for a while, but also because I thought we were chasing only one guy. who's this fucker? are there more pirates to chase? better apprehend him. tough situation, because Anka's jump jets and armor are perfect for jumping down upon the wounded guy, but then he might get away.

Personally I think Dim should just stay as hidden as possible so nobody shoots at her.

I say use the jump jets to ambush the guy with the AM rifle because, as we know, the rifle requires time between shots.

We can disarm the now-wounded fleeing pirate (so that he can't shoot himself), and keep guns trained on the curtained building as we back away from the combat area. Unless we need to go in and take out the pirates? I dunno.

Hal 2013/01/03(Thu)15:04 No. 482061 ID: 0eef61
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Anka kicks her jump jets on and boosts hell-bent up to the parapets. She catches the shirm on the reload.

She blasts the gun out of his hands and some skull out of his head. He may still be alive (we thick-skulled shirm are surprisingly resilient to headshots) but he'll be in critical condition.

Hal 2013/01/03(Thu)15:04 No. 482062 ID: 0eef61
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Down on the ground Talia tosses her grenade to me (without pulling the pin! I think she likes me!). I head toward the doorway while she moves to the target, who is now trying to crawl his way to cover.

She gets about halfway when the curtains blast back and a barrel of buckshot is emptied into her back.
If it was unarmored me I'd have probably been splattered but her armor saves her. She stumbles, though, and I see blood.

Well the guy that shot her is right there. Shove your gun somewhere painful and fire. You won't be missing this time that's for sure!

Or you could throw your grenade right in there. Tempting.

>>482062
look out for that dude in the window.

>>482073
Good catch, although it's Talia that needs to watch out.

Anka may be able to get an angle on him from the roof of the tower...

Hal: Switch to automatic pistol in case the laser is still on cooldown, [switch] to semiautomatic mode, take a few shots aiming to disarm/harm the shotgun user, then use [Gun Kata] (Handgun skill variant) and enter the building to go for knockout.

Talia: take cover around the tower, inform of guy in window around the corner, instruct to peek out around the tower entrance to make sure the injured (Delter? I forget) is actually disabled and prevent a suicide attempt. If he isn't out of the fight, she needs to make sure he is, and then take cover where he is resting (if he is out, she stays at the tower entrance, suppresses window guy). Inform Anka of who/what is in the window.

Anka: Remove/destroy/confiscate Shirm gun. Needs to be informed of the guy on the window nearby, odds are high that her position above prevents her from doing anything, but the angle of the tower might help. If not, she should be able to scout possible risks ahead from her high position.

Hal 2013/01/03(Thu)23:56 No. 482142 ID: 0eef61
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Anka grabs the antimatter gun from the shirm's limp hands and slaps it into the magnetic holster at her back, flipping the release so it sticks. She then climbs the domed tower as

Talia pushes her way forward, her blood fizzling and evaporating as it trickles down her armor. As she nears the grounded pirate I shout a warning about "Guy in the window!" The Guy in the Window throws himself out of it and ramjets toward her.
I like to think that without me she never would have looked up in time and nailed him in the side with her laser rifle. His aim is thrown enough as a result to shoot nothing but the ground (again, hoping there isn't some kind of dirt-mosaic we're pockmarking here).
The pirate on the ground is fumbling with his laser pistol, but he isn't aiming it at the armored delter blowing holes in his buddies. It looks like he's going to try to kill himself and get back to base the express way.

I steel myself to breach the building, and briefly consider using Talia's grenade. The hell with it. We've done enough property damage for one day, and I have no way of knowing if the guy has a hostage without seeing for myself. Instead I holster my still-overheated laser pistol, flinching a little as it scalds my carapace slightly, and whip out the machine pistol. It's on semiautomatic right now; I feather a few rounds into the doorway and get a hailstorm of buckshot for my efforts; FUCK.

Ok; false alarm.
It punches right through my snazzy coat, but no one ever knows where a Shirm's legs are, and I'm nicked but not blown away. It hurts like shit, but I've had worse.
Diamanda screams behind me as I rock back a little. The poor thing may think he's punched my ticket.
Still, I'm kind of glad she's watching. This next trick always impresses the ladies.

Hal 2013/01/03(Thu)23:58 No. 482143 ID: 0eef61
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I inhale. Push the pain and the jittery shock of half a second ago out of your mind, Halaris.

I turn the corner into the building as the pirate pumps down on the shotgun.

As he pumps up I take two steps toward him, right shoulder first.

He starts to swivel the business end of his boomstick down toward my head and I bring the stock of the pistol down on his right hand.

As his fingers slide off the shotgun I follow the motion through until the barrel of my gun is touching his right thigh.

I exhale.

I pull the trigger, and the bullet rips straight through the meat of the Qal's thigh and out the other side. That's enough to get him to let go of the shotgun entirely and scream right in my ear.

Jeez, my leg hurts.

Hal has 1/2 hit points left.

Gg. Do you have handcuffs? Or something? Take the shotgun away from him, shout for Anka to help Talia to prevent any of the bogeys from killing themselves/killing your people, you drag this guy out into the open. Get everyone restrained, disarmed, in plain view, and not about to die (that means you, shirm on the roof). Then, uh... What's next, exactly?

>>482143
A Qal. They take way more than that to go down. Put some more rounds in him and toss the shotgun outside. Your allies now outnumber the last active pirate 2 to 1 and he's out of cover, should be a simple fight.

I think we must be almost done here.

>Hal has 1/2 hit points left

aaaa shoot him in the arms a lot

Hal: you got one more turn of use; [Gun Kata] once more so the Qal really hurts, and then [Threaten]/[Diplomacy]

([logic] if you can badassly pick up his likely to stay down shotgun for dramatic effect while injured, else stay semiauto)

My thought is something like "I hope you prefer to be a captured corsair (defeated desperado?) over a mutilated marauder"

Anka: Inform anyone if there are any other seen hostiles, else its time to drop down like a badass space amazon and prove that penis envy can come in the form of power armored punches that prevent suicide. unless you know way better than me that close combat is not your niche, than ignore the stupid thoughts in your mind and just start from above suppression fire

Talia: Stupid/badass seeking part of me wants you to activate jump jets and basically use the pirate as your landing point to throw him to the ground. Safer option is probably to fire at will, you got a back full of hurt, a laser full of pain, and a bad case of Delter Diplomacy to dish out regardless.

Hal 2013/01/04(Fri)21:48 No. 482515 ID: 0eef61
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The rocketman's wearing stronger armor than we thought; he doesn't land with a wounded thump so much as a charging warcry, and he comes in swinging against Talia. His arms swell with hastily constructed muscle tissue.

She lunges beneath his rifle and pulls her cruel little electrocuted combat blade out of its sheath, grabbing a handful of sand from the street as she does so.

Hal 2013/01/04(Fri)21:51 No. 482517 ID: 0eef61
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Talia loudly tells the Qal where he can stick his firearm as the sand goes in his face. The blade goes into his shoulder a split second later.
Enough juice goes into him to basically cook a human or a shirm, but he just drops to the ground unconscious, juttering and convulsing. Qal are made of sterner stuff.

Oh, that reminds me.
I dodge my dance partner's clumsy fist and crack him in the face with the automatic's barrel, then bury a bullet in both kneecaps, just to be safe.
I feel the adrenaline wear off from that little kata I just pulled. I could really use a sit-down.

Outside Anka slams her jumpjets down to ground level and tackles our runner hard, knocking his gun out of his hands and pulling him into a crushing headlock.
"Move away from the light, Skinny," she tells him as she slams his face into the dust.

And like that, we've won. We've got ourselves one pirate slowly bleeding out on the parapet, a couple cleanly out cold, and one with pain on his brain and swiss cheese for legs (thanks to yours truly).
We also have one Dreimian diplomat who stands from her cover, mouth speechless and agape.

So how am I going to clean up this little mess?

Okay. Get all your rotten eggs in one basket, and see if you can get medical attention for the guy on the roof.

Now, why were we chasing these dudes? I assume we had a good reason. What's the bigger picture going on here?

>>482517

Not sure, but you could always make sure they don't die from bleeding out, wouldn't want pirates get warned too soon, if the firefight didn't alert them already,

Hal 2013/01/05(Sat)00:28 No. 482545 ID: 0eef61
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>>482522
>((http://tgchan.org/kusaba/graveyard/res/244037.html))

"Right. Ookay." I walk over to my men, or women, or whatever, woozy from what's probably not blood loss yet. "Anka: go check on the guy on the walls. Talia, go get the big qal in the building and bring him back here so we can patch him up. Be careful; he may have some resistance in him if he hasn't passed out yet. I'll watch our buddies here." I sit down heavily in the tower doorway. That wasn't the worst fight I've fought but it took something out of me. I may want to get this leg looked at before it scars too bad.

Anka boosts up to the rooftops then to the parapet. She ducks out of view while she looks at the antimatter rifleman.

"You alright?" I ask Talia. "You're bleeding." Talia shrugs, wincing a little at the gesture. "Flesh wound. My blood should probably melt any buckshot left inside me. I thhhhink that's a good thing. It's worked out in the past." She heads into the building, laser rifle at the ready. "Nice job, Hal. Nice to know you've got some balls to back up that big mouth of yours."
I'm about to fire back something about her seeing me naked or something but I think I'll just take the complement.

Anka pokes her head back up. "He's alive, and I think he'll hold on long enough for us to get some uh," she looks down. "A band-aid or something for him. We might not want to move him, though."

Diamanda's still just standing there and staring at me. What's the matter, she never seen a gunfight before?

Oh; maybe not.

Ok we stopped the runner, the captain is handling the bush camp and so far no Dreimian casualties so we are doing good so far.

Lets check on Diamanda make sure she is alright, then we should get some medical help for our prisoners.

ask her if she's alright, charm her into being alright if she isn't, and send her to get reinforcements while you each watch a guy so they don't try to play smart and off themselves.

Hal 2013/01/06(Sun)00:43 No. 483041 ID: 0eef61
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"Anka, can you stay up there with that guy until we get medical supplies?" I ask her.

"Yeah, but I'm not sure just how many supplies we'll be able to get for these guys from here," she calls back down.

"They've got gauze and such, right? That'll help," I say.
"This guy has a hole in his head you could fit a silver dollar in."
"We could I don't know. Apply a lot of pressure or something."

"I'm pretty sure they don't have any IV bags of electocuted lavablood lying around for our runner, for example." Anka looks down at the wounded pirate on her wall. "And I'm, uhhh, not exactly sure how to field dress a shirm. They're basically a crab head on three toothpicks. No offense."

"None taken, you giant fleshy sack of goopy organs. What would you suggest?" I ask.

"I mean, we should be okay, but there's a little more risk involved, especially for the shirm. We could fly them back up to the ship to get them more, uh, advanced first aid," says Anka. "No offense, Diamanda." Diamanda doesn't respond.

"Uh, That'll tie up our shuttle for a few hours, though, and once the pirates don't get a report back from this patrol or whatever it was we might just need it. Couldn't we just reprogram their spawners to our frequency and execute them?" I ask.

Anka shakes her head. "We'd have to destroy or hack whatever spawners they have set up in town or the bush camp. The captain'll maybe do that for us, destroy and hack-happy as he is, but until then these guys aren't ours just yet."

"Okay, Sergeant. Noted."
"Hey, good fight there, Hal. You kept everyone alive. Maybe I misjudged you a little."
"What?"
"Oh, nothing," I can tell she's grinning under her helmet. "I just thought maybe you were...compensating for something."
"Says the lady swinging the minigun around." It's low-hanging fruit, but whatever. She laughs. It's a nice laugh, very from the diaphragm but identifiably female.

Hal 2013/01/06(Sun)00:44 No. 483042 ID: 0eef61
File 135746184235.png - (341.33KB , 800x600 , 20.png )

Talia drags the unconscious Qal out of the building. "Hal, look, we gotta move quick after this. Once the pirates figure out what happened they're going to batten down the hatches on that leatherworking place they've checkpointed and do nasty things to us or the village. We've got four of them right here so the garrison's got to be a little drained. We should hit them hard before they're ready for us."

"Alternatively," calls Anka, "we could just park the Unflagging" (which is the name of the ship we rode in on) "a mile or so above their HQ and blast the shit/pirates out of it."
"That would also involve reducing the leatherworkers and a couple buildings around it to rubble," I say.
Anka shrugs. "Well, the Dreimians have already moved out because of the pirate infestation."
"I hear swashbuckling fucks your property value something awful," I muse. "I still don't know if the Dreimians would be convinced."
"Well, we could go in guns blazing but it would make things a lot easier. And that's your job as diplomat, right, Hal?" Anka says. "Convince them. Start with that one there before a fly gets into her mouth."

I guess it's a choice between a ground attack on the pirates and talking my way into them letting us blow them up from the skies instead.

I turn to Diamanda. "Are you alright?" I ask, dialing up the [charm] to try and yank her back down to Earth. "You did good, Diamanda. You kept your cool cool and your head down."

"That-"
"It's okay to be a little shaky right now. After my first gunfight I-"
"That was incredible!" She leaps from behind the well. "The way you moved, and the flashing lasers and things everywhere! It was just like a scifi action thing! And no one even died!"
"Cute," Talia mutters derisively as the newest member of the Halaris fanclub hops up and down.

Aha. She's into it.
Perchance it's time to blow the dust off the patented Halaris Gameface.

Lets get this ball rolling. We need to confiscate the pirates weapons and have someone guarding and tending to their wounds so they don't die or try to off themselves.
Didn't the Dreimians have some rudimentary armed forces/law enforcement group? If Diamanda could go fetch them while we leave someone (Anka?) guarding these guys until they arrive.

If we could somehow block or jam the city garrisons communication with the bush camp we could claim that it has been destroyed, and if they don't surrender we will blow them and their respawner to hell.

Anyway we need to get to the leatherworks and see what is the situation. They might be completely unprepared and there may not be that many pirates so we could take the garrison by a surprise attack.

And we couldn't have done it so well without her. Her knowledge of the city really helped set up the ambush.

Yes. Gameface. She IS cute.

Go on to say that while it went rather well this time around you can't guarantee it'll go the same way if you have to take on the pirates again. In fact, you're lucky that the shotgun blast didn't kill you. As it stands one of your legs is half gone. Ask her just how much the buildings near their hideout are worth. Would it really be so bad if they had to do some reconstruction after the pirates are dealt with? It would make it much safer for you and your comrades if you could just hover over their base and bombard it.

Throw your Diplomacy in there after you Charm her up a bit.

To the Council or the Guard Captain? Hal 2013/01/06(Sun)22:09 No. 483232 ID: 0eef61
File 135753897811.png - (274.88KB , 800x600 , 21.png )

"Well we couldn't have set that ambush up without you, Diamanda," I say. "I've seen more than a handful of civilians lose their heads when shooting starts, but you were very brave. We're"-Talia coughs-"in your debt."
"Really?"
"Really."
"I didn't feel brave. I was just...squatting. That takedown in the building was, like, poetry," she says.

"That's the best thing you could have done. Your safety's a hell of a lot more important than ours. But thank you." I charmingly doff my hat and bat not an eyelash at Anka's snort from up on the walls. "Really, I'm just doing my job."

"That's a hell of a paycheck," says Diamanda.
"Yeah, well, he didn't get a back full of buckshot," says Talia.
"Oh, and you guys too!" Diamanda turns excitedly to my conspicuously chilly companion. "With the knife and the jumping around? Holy shit!"
"Okay," Talia tells me on the comms circuit. "Maybe she's not that bad."

"I did so get shot," I tell her with not a little reproach, showing her my leg. "Oh and that reminds me, Diamanda. It went pretty good this time but I'm not entirely sure it'll go so smoothly if we take on the rest of the pirates at their home base. I kiiind of have a third of my leg splattered all over the street. I was wondering: just how much is the leatherworkers' worth to the town?"

"Well, it supplies around a quarter of the clothes we wear," says Diamanda.
"And this one wears a quarter of the clothes she should at the best of times," Talia whispers.
"Or it did, before the pirates took over," Diamanda didn't hear anything.
"But what about the building itself? And maybe a few of the buildings around it? How long would it take to do some...reconstruction?"
"Why do you ask?" says Diamanda, incredulously.
Anka leans over the railing on the wall. "We were thinking of just blowing it up from orbit with the pirates inside. It would make our lives a lot easier." She coughs into her helmet. "Sorry. Been yelling long distances a lot today."

"Iiii don't know if I have the authority to sanction an orbital bombardment for you, as radical as that sounds," says Diamanda. "We should probably go to the council."
"I thought as much," I say. "Do you folks have any captain of the guard?"
"Oh yeah," she says, her eyes lighting up. "We could ask him! Drakine! If you get him behind you we wouldn't need the council's permission nearly as much." She seems to reconsider. "I mean they might not appreciate you going behind their backs? And you already talked them into helping you out once? But Drakine is a bit more predisposed to more, umm, radical plans than they are, and as Domestic Defender this could conceivably fall under his purview."

I was talking about getting some guards for these captives, but that works too.

I believe the quote goes something like "It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission". Lets go for Drakine as our source, take out the enemy, and then come up with the million decent justifications after the fact.

No time to go back to the council and while >>483236
sounds good i still think we should go and take a look at the leatherworks. We should give them a chance to surrender before we blow them sky high and they might have some Dreimian hostages to stop alliance people from blowing them up.

>>483259
Dude, we just went through all that effort in order to maintain element of surprise. They're pirates. They aren't gonna surrender unless we have our guns against their heads, ready to fire. I do like the idea of asking for surrender once we have our plasma weaponry arrayed above their location with full permission to engage, and we've caught them with their pants down. That will be a fantastic time to ask about surrender. Right now, we can't really back that up.

how about both? Hal can go convince the council and Dee the captain.

Hal 2013/01/07(Mon)15:58 No. 483373 ID: 0eef61
File 135760312485.png - (301.72KB , 800x600 , 22.png )

I decide to head to the Guard Captain. Diamanda offers to split up and go to the council but I'll have to think about that one. I'm not entirely convinced they should be torn away from their essential work with zoning or whatever to worry their pretty little heads about a very mild suborbital plasma cannon airstrike that will probably only destroy 3 buildings. Maximum.

The guy at the gate of the guardhouse is reluctant to let me in without nebulous "papers" of some kind, but he apparently knows Diminai, that waitress I hit on a little earlier, and he says a friend of Diminai, he tells me, is a friend of him.

Drakine's office is spare but for his desk, his gun, and his newspaper (that quaintest and most efficient toilet paper substitute of cultural dinosaurs).

"Commander Drakine?" I say.
"Yeah."
"I'm Agent Halaris, of the Alliance Task Force Recon Fleet. We're here about the pirate problem I understand you've been having?"
He turns the page.
"Commander," I say. "These are wanted men in the Alliance, and I'm here to remove them from your village before they do anything to compromise the safety of your citizens. You know about respawners?"

He sniffs. "Yeah."
"Then you know that a conventional approach isn't going to deal with these aliens. I'm here to offer you a solution. My team and I are going to clear out the headquarters here in town, and a separate group has already been dispatched from our ship, the Unflagging, to take out the bandit outpost outside the city. Now if we deactivate the pirates' respawners their death pulse, that's what we call the sort of 'signal' a body sends out upon expiration, will ping to either the closest available respawner or, if we reconfigure their uplink before their death-"

"Cut to the chase."
"Sorry. The chase is this: if we can destroy their respawners, upon death they'll reconstitute on our respawners aboard the Unflagging, leaving them all trussed up for incarceration. No giftwrap required. Now I've already got permission from the council to infiltrate their headquarters in the Leatherworker district, but as you know they're entrenched in there very deep. They've set up a machinegun nest-"
"I know."

"So since my team is doing this operation, I came here to request a favor in return. If we can hover the Unflagging above the city, we'll be able to launch a highly precise airstrike that will demolish the pirate headquarters and damage, at most, one building on each side of it."
Drakine doesn't look up from the paper.
"Nah."

>>483373
Well, what are you waiting for?

Seduce him.

Well that isn't positive, nor is it informative. Get some more details from the guy on why not and what he'd rather happen. Let's not immediately go on the offensive, here.

>>483377
As funny as it would be to seduce literally every figure of authority we encounter, we really should ask him what his plan is to take out the heavily armed undying army of pirates sitting in a residential area of THE FUCKING CAPITAL.

Hal 2013/01/07(Mon)17:46 No. 483399 ID: 0eef61
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"What, exactly, is your plan for dealing with these pirates, then?" I ask.

"I got no plan," he says, "Because the pirates ain't the ones who opened fire in a public place and the pirates ain't asked me to blow any buildings up yet."

He raises his head and regards me with a look that makes me feel like a first grader on a veteran's fresh-cut grass. "Far as I'm concerned, they're your problem. And I ain't evacuating a city block, blowin' up three buildings, and scaring the entire city near to death to solve someone else's problem.

"Now you want to go in there and shoot them to shit, well, much obliged. They ain't my people and I've been getting complaints about them. They make me nervous. They don't make me nearly as nervous as your talk of an air strike, Agent Halaris of the Alliance Task Force Recon Fleet."

>>483399
"Perhaps I explained this poorly.
This plan does not require your participation; the extent of your control is how many people are in the stike zone."

>>483399
>apply diplomacy
Air strikes ain't so messy as exchanging gunfire, and are a lot more quick. You're worried about your people getting hurt, right? I'm trying to avoid the same. I know it doesn't feel good to do it that way

I'll be taking this to the council next, I'd wanted it to be quicker but I'll take that time to argue for what I think is best. Can I at least assume that you won't get in the way of that?

tell him about the three stooges you shot up just now.

>>483403
Let's avoid hardball for now. I don't think it'll do anything aside from further alienating ourselves from the locals.

>>483399

Okay, maybe I'm misunderstanding something and the like, but I really want you to slap the shit out of the guy. But, that would alienate us from the community here, so we can't do that.

Still... all the 'badass' (yeah, right) shithead is asked for is evacuate the area around the priate's base, so that we can hit it from the air and yet he does not budge! THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, CAPTAIN! Do you NOT CARE about your people, who have no goddamned respawners?

Hal 2013/01/08(Tue)00:29 No. 483488 ID: 0eef61
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"Look. Commander." I say [diplomatically], putting my hands on the table. "Another firefight is the last thing you want. Our small arms aren't projectile based so the dropoff is minimal, and even though there are penetrative dropoff failsafes built in for space combat I can't gurantee the pirates will use them. One blast from an antimatter rifle could go through four solid stone walls no problem and still have enough power behind it to bore a hole as big as your- my fist in an unsuspecting bystander. And they do have antimatter rifles.

"I get you're worried about your people getting hurt; you have my word and the word of the Alliance that these pirates will hurt them. Your people are our number one priority. We're expendable; you aren't. The faster and more decisively we take these guys out the less capable they'll be to strike back. And I don't want to alarm you, Commander," (I do want to alarm him) "but if we give them time to counterattack they're not going to go after the immortal space marines with laser weaponry. If we strike quickly, decisively, and with extreme force no one needs to die today. Well, not permanently, anyw-"

"How'd you get that hole in you?" he interrupts.

"What? Oh. This. That firefight you mentioned."
"I was there," says Diamanda, "and I can tell you that Halaris' first priority was minimizing casualties. He even went nonlethal on the pirates. I felt as safe as an unarmed woman in a gunfight could possibly feel." Her sleeve brushes against mine. I wonder what her claws look like under those.

"I'm about to go plead our case to the Council," I say. "Time is of the essence and I wanted to be quicker but I'm going to argue for what I think is best, and I am sure this is best. You can rebuild a leatherworker but you can't rebuild a life. Not yet." I let go of the table with a little dramatic flourish I'm particularly proud of and start to turn around when the magic words I've been waiting to hear sound sonorously through my skull.

"Hold on now there, Agent," says Drakine. "Siddown and tell me exactly what this here plan is and what I need to do."

We need to *quietly* get everyone out of the two buildings adjacent to the pirate headquarters, without the pirates noticing in time to do anything about it.

Then we'll make a quick call and you'll have one less pirate headquarters. "Smoking crater delivery, how may I take your order?"

Elephant Guy 2013/01/08(Tue)06:41 No. 483509 ID: 684ecf
File 135765610098.gif - (401.45KB , 245x186 , ohmy.gif )

sit down and tell him while you try not to get too distracted by thoughts of sexy exposed bug claws.

>>483489
Pretty much this. It needs to be done quietly and quickly if it's to work.

Hal 2013/01/08(Tue)12:12 No. 483597 ID: 0eef61
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"We need to evacuate the area in the pirates' immediate vicinity, and we need to do it quickly and quietly," I say. "They catch wind of this operation, they're going to start taking hostages and we can't have that. Then I make a quick call to HQ and bam, one smoking crater, serves a dozen pirates."

"All right. Call your people, Agent." Drakine sighs and puts his paper down. "I'll round up mine. Prep your group however you do that and meet me back here in ten. Anyone bites it I'm holding you as responsible as I hold myself."

"I understand, Commander." I bow myself out.

"You've got quite the way with words, Agent Halaris," says Diamanda.
"Well, when your race is the weakest and ugliest in the Alliance you have to level the playing field somehow." I dial my uplink in to the Unflagging. "Some shirm learn how to handle a piece real good and some become cunning linguists."
"You handled yourself well enough in the alleyways."
"Yeah, well, I figure why choose?"
I call up the team on the Unflagging and get Belding.

"It's the diplomatic team," he says to someone out of earshot. "Yeah, the new guy. I read you, Agent. We're prepping the drop. Are you moving on the HQ?"
"Yeah, about that, lieutenant," I say. "Can you spare us a quick airstrike?"
"If you want an airstrike in town you need approval from the Dreimians," says Belding, sharply. "and I doubt they would sanction us bombing their city."
"Well, lieutenant, doubt no more because they just did." The pride in my tone is obvious enough that I don't bother trying to hide it. "I need a bombardment on my mark in thirty minutes."

There is a brief silence.
"Hold," he says, then to someone else, "He's asking for an airstrike. Yes. No, he says they've cleared it."
"If you want I can get the guard captain on the line to tell you," I say.
"That won't be necessary, Agent," says Belding. "I'll relay this to the bridge and we'll begin our descent into the atmosphere. I'll put you through to Gunnery so you can give them your targets. And good... good work down there so far."
"Affirmative, Lieutenant. Thanks for the assist."
"And Agent."
"Lieutenant?"
"Some of the strike team want to know if you've banged any ants down there yet." His voice is as even and deadpan as always but I hear laughter behind him.

>>483597
Ants? What is that, a racial slur? Also, no. You're in the middle of a mission, that would just be disruptive.

A gentleman never tells.
Do try to be careful with the collateral damage when you rain down divine retribution from on high. And don't do anything that will let them see you coming, we need a bit to get civilians clear, and if they take hostages this whole plan goes to shit.

Wait, I thought we were just waiting for these fireworks to celebrate bagging our first dreimian? I mean, I thought that was why we were bringing Diamanda with us to the location...

Oh, and uh, I thought the guard captain was going to ask the council. Do we actually have verified permission yet?

Hal 2013/01/08(Tue)20:13 No. 483753 ID: 0eef61
File 135770483138.png - (283.30KB , 800x600 , 26.png )

"A gentleman never kisses and tells," I say. "Good luck doing all the hard work, fellas. And thanks for the fireworks." I hang up and go to brief my team. My leg's still aching. Don't worry, middy, we'll be out of this soon.

>>483724
The Captain of the Guard has the authority to sanction this himself; the Council haven't been made aware. If I'm going to tell them I'd better get a runner or something down there soon; we're near the green light for this.
Diamanda volunteers to break the news to them. She'll try and sugarcoat basically one-upping their authority as best she can. Technically, she reminds me, we're doing nothing wrong.

So that's something.

Drakine, Anka, and I go room-to-room clearing the Dreimians out of the surrounding buildings near the blast zone. Turns out that red one's an office block and it provides a bit of a challenge. Talia's waiting on the ground to move the civilians. She may not have the manner of Anka but she's a lot stealthier outside power armor, and I trust her.

Hal 2013/01/08(Tue)20:14 No. 483754 ID: 0eef61
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I take the top floor, clearing out the last few harried office workers. The overseer fusses but calms down a peg when I tell him he can deal with paid leave or explosive plasma.

I open the door to the last room, hustling now. We've been at it about five minutes, and I'm feeling the faint shivers of anticipation in my radula.

It's a shirm thing.

I open the last door on the floor. "You need to-"

non lethal takedown.

"-drop that and put your hands where I can see them right now. Not looking for a fight, but I can make one."

If there is anything that looks even remotely like a radio, first shot goes there. Quickdraw laser powers activate.

>>483754
Quickdraw.
"-put your hands in the air NOW!"
Ask who they are; you weren't told a Delter was going to be in this office.

Alternatively if they're carrying a gun, just quickdraw and shoot. Aim for their gun arm/hand to disable, then to cripple. Also radio in that you found a pirate in the office.

To make the action a bit more formal [Threaten] and pull out automatic to make the Delter stay put. Oh also, once thats handled, quickly scan the area (maybe call up an ally to do that).

Hal 2013/01/08(Tue)22:22 No. 483774 ID: 0eef61
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I [quickdraw] my laser pistol out of my cloak, and aiming at the blue radio-looking thing in the Delter's hand.

I flick the prime on with my thumb and the pistol thrums [threaten]ingly to life. "Drop it! Hands in the air!"

Here's the thing, though, about threatening to shoot a man whose goal is to warn his friends, when his death will last an hour and result in him warning his friends:

It doesn't usually work.

He goes for his gun and I fire, missing the radio due to the sudden motion and hitting him square in the stomach. His clothes smoke and pop and I've penetrated his armor, but he's still pulling out an antimatter pistol.

One clean shot from that and I will die.

>>483774
Yeah, but if he radios his friends the mission is FUCKED, and if you die then you can respawn.

Take out that radio if it kills you. Get close if you need to.

maximum power, blow whole arm off if need be.

Actually that's a great idea, blow off his hand. His shoulder might make an easier target though.

Analysis.

If we kill him, he respawns. We're fucked. We can't kill him.

If we blow up the radio and then die, he walks over to warn his buddies. We're fucked. He must not be able to kill us and leave this room. (Depending on how long revives take, you may be able to call for help from the ship. In that case, go for the communicator. Otherwise..)

Him dying is an insta-loss. Him surviving and us dying is a slow loss.

If we don't blow up the radio and he calls in that we're evacuating, we're fucked. BUT -

That concept needs a bit of time to communicate. IF we can successfully imitate his voice, we might be able to call them off. Go for the arm/shoulder with the anti-matter gun, jump to the side to dodge. Sacrifice accuracy to protect yourself. Once the anti-matter gun is no longer a threat, move into close combat. It'd be nice if he stayed conscious so we could talk to him and get a feel for how he sounds. (Can your species even imitate his? Note that his pirate buddies won't be all his species, probably, so he'll speak a standard language - easier to imitate, more margin for error). Then if he had time to call for help, call in that you took down the attacker.

an hour is long enough. riddle him full of holes.

Hal 2013/01/09(Wed)22:45 No. 483962 ID: 0eef61
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I flip the limiter completely off and feel the grip of the laser pistol vibrate violently. I fire and leap to one side.

Then I remember my wounded leg and my leap turns more into a clumsy, lurching fall, which is most likely what saves my life.

The antimatter pistol booms to life, and if I'd been a couple inches further up my brain would be out and about for the world to see.

As it stands it catches my hat, which is knocked off my head and irrevocably destroyed.

My overcharged laser blast hits the Delter in the bicep and sublimates it. He screams as his hand comes off at the wrist, trailing ropes of sticky, popping ichor. Where it hits the radio the plastic bubbles and deforms.

The delter hits the floor a split second after I do, his wound half-cauterized but pumping a considerable amount of considerably deadly blood. He has minutes left to live, if that.

The radio is reachable if I'm a little careful.

tackle them and wrestle away gun. then if laser is still operational burn the rest of the stump so they stop bleeding out.

yeah, well, he still has that gun. make him not have the gun anymore. and then make yourself have it because damn, that's a sweet gun.

Hal 2013/01/09(Wed)23:32 No. 483977 ID: 0eef61
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I grab the gun. Greetings, my purple, glowy new friend. Console me at the loss of my lid. I can't put you on my head but I can use you to pop the heads of others.

((You have learned 2 new skills upon equipping the antimatter pistol (Tied to Hal's Handguns skill):
[Fire]: Antimatter guns are temperamental and unwieldy. There are no tricks to an antimatter pistol, and no flashy techniques. Hal can point this thing and shoot, and anything in the crosshairs will get a sizable hole in it. Slow but devastating. Takes a turn to cool down between shots unless Hal uses
[Overfire]: Allows Hal to fire on a turn that would normally be used to cool the gun down. Has a 10% chance to destroy the gun and damage Hal along with it.))

I cast a mournful look to my hat. Brain and skull grows back, I reflect, but good haberdashery is fleeting.
"Heard laserfire from the complex." Anka's voice on the radio breaks me out of my reverie. "What happened, Hal?"
"A straggler," I say. I kick the dying delter gingerly, making sure not to get any blood on my already wobbly leg. "He's bleeding out; there's not much I can do at this point that won't just kill him outright."
"Then we don't have much time," says Anka. "Drakine says if you want to call in your cavalry call it in quick."

It may just be showtime. Do I make any attempt to contact the pirates and see if I can negotiate a surrender or do one more sweep or do I call in the artillery?

i think it's time to drop the hammer.

I think it's time to call in the artillery, then try to contact the pirates. After all, you did imply that you were willing to negotiate to the counsel.

The fact that you were unable to settle the situation amicably will be quite unfortunate.

negotiate with them. the Delter way.

>>483982
With antimatter artillery?

>>483994

with antimatter artillery.

If you end up trying to talk them into giving up, you might want to let on to the fact that you're about to artillerize them into component particles, but not to the fact that your ship has respawners. Might get them to come quietly. I don't know, do pirates usually get the death sentence? Not much basis for negotiation in that case ..

[sorry for double post] That aside, this is a tradeoff decision. Is your job to sell the Alliance to the locals? In that case, you really want to demonstrate peacability, and leading the pirates out in cuffs to face Proper Nonviolent Justice might just achieve that.

Or is your job to justify explosions to the natives? Your captain might take this position, but then again, your captain will probably expect you to do your job more than he'll expect you to play to his insanity.

So I'd say negotiate.

>>483977
Are you sure we can't use Delter Diplomacy to cauterize the wound further with the laspistol, to keep him from bleeding out?

Then we would want to leave the radio unused as not to alert the pirates even EARLIER.

Also, don't call in the strike until you are absolutely sure all civilians are clear. Kill one of them and you will be in deep shit.

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)16:20 No. 484224 ID: 0eef61
File 135786364237.png - (372.09KB , 800x600 , 31.png )

>>484083
I shoot him again it'll probably just kill him. No; it's time to bring the hammer down. I pick up the radio from the dying pirate and stagger to the first floor, correcting my walk to something a lot less labored as I approach everyone else. No need for them to know just how hard that was.

Anka and Drakine are waiting for me outside. Talia is getting the civilians, Diamanda included, somewhere safe.
"Everything's ready, Hal," she says, her voice low and excited. "The strike team's moving on the bush camp as soon as they see the boom. Bring the thunder."
"Hold on," I say, and I flip the pirate's radio on.

"This is Agent ๒ยאק๏ค of the Alliance," I say. "I have a bank of plasma cannons zeroed in on your building and warming up to fire."
"Hal what the fuck" Anka starts to say but I wave her off.

"If I see anyone leave the building, I'm giving the order. If no one responds to this message 10 seconds after it ends I'm giving the order. If that response is not one of immediate and unconditional surrender I'm giving the order. Do you copy?"

Anka is frozen. Drakine drums his fingers against his rifle.

Six seconds pass.

"Greetings, ๒ยאק๏ค of the Alliance." The voice on the other end has the wavy delivery of a shirm. "We have fifty men and respawners outside town. If you destroy this base we will move into the city and kill every Dreimian we find. Copy?"

Should I let him know about the Captain's impending attack? It'll put quite the scare into them but it might make his job a little harder if they know what's coming.

>>484224
No no no no no.

Okay. Negotiations are officially over. They had their chance, you've fulfilled your obligation to give them a chance to be peaceable. The next step depends critically on one question. Do respawners have a rate limit?

If they don't have a rate limit, phone your captain and tell him he has incoming, then give the order.

.. If they do have a rate limit, give the order first.

>>484224
Give the order. Tell the strike team about the respawners and how many guys they claim to have.

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)17:16 No. 484239 ID: 0eef61
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"This is Agent Halaris on ground team 1 to Bridge. Come in."

"Read you loud and clear, Agent Halaris," says whoever is manning the bridge. "You've been a good boy and santa's here to put a gift down the chimney."

"What?"

"Uhh, sorry. Human thing. I'll patch you through to Argus in Gunnery."

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)17:17 No. 484240 ID: 0eef61
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"We're using the Mk 4 Plasma Long Cannon, the Bunker Buster" Argus tells me, and the excitement in his voice is palpable. "This baby drills holes in starships then superheats the interior. Pops 'em like an egg."

"Eggs pop?"

"They do when you nuke 'em with plasma," Argus says delightedly. "Eyes on your area in the viewfinder, Hal." He listens to someone else in the room for a second. "OK, we're warmed up. What's my target?"

"The L-shaped building with blue detail."

"L for leather. Cute. Stand back and watch me knock it down."

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)17:19 No. 484241 ID: 0eef61
File 135786716516.png - (286.23KB , 800x600 , 34.png )

"The ground team needs to know: there are around 50 pirates in the bush camp and they have respawners. They need to move quick."
"Yeah, yeah, roger. Don't give me blue balls, Hal. Give the order."

"Do I need to delay them anymore?" I ask. "You need to get close. It has to be perfect."

"You worry too much, baby," says Argus. "We've been nice and snuggly for a while, now."

"What?"

"Look up and say 'fire.'"

"Fire."

"Firing for effect."

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)17:19 No. 484242 ID: 0eef61
File 135786719703.png - (303.59KB , 800x600 , 35.png )

What looked like a clear sky opens and then shatters.

>>484242
I think a "wow" would be appropriate here.

Hal 2013/01/10(Thu)17:55 No. 484253 ID: 0eef61
File 135786932249.png - (308.94KB , 800x600 , 36.png )

"Wow," I say.

Dust and chunks of building create a low fog that clings to the square where the Leatherworks stood. The rubble is minimal; the building was atomized. So was a healthy portion of all the buildings next to it.

"That's quite the mess we just made," Drakine observes, dryly.

"Yeah," says Anka.

"Reckon any of the pirates survived that?" he asks.

"Reckon not."

Now I'm going to have to deal with the fallout, and I'm not just talking about the wreckage and combing for survivors.
The council members might not be happy about this.

Okay. First, that was awesome. Second, does the alliance have any sort of insurance pool for collateral damage in the line of duty? I was thinking "the alliance of course offers to cover any repairs" on the basis that if you can build a spaceship, restoring a building should be chump change, but if there's a formal approach to getting reparations for damage inflicted in the course of duty, it might help if you made the council aware of this. If not, our job becomes a _bit_ harder.

Second, cap'n just started his attack and is about to get a few more enemies via respawner. Are you in range to potentially give support or is it too far away to reach in time? Are any of your team snipers and could get into position in time?

Third, keep your eyes open for survivors. One of the pirates was in an adjacent building; there could be more. Find a high spot, keep watch, cover the civilians.

We can talk to the council when the fighting is well and truly over.

Start searching for survivors. Keep one of you scanning the surroundings at all times. Don't bother reinforcing the main group; that's not your job, and the Captain didn't give you anyone he couldn't spare.

>>484253
You can try telling the council, when it's time, that this was the best way for you to do it. It would have been just a few soldiers against all those pirates, and if you let any of them get away there would be civilian casualties. As we saw, there was at least one pirate outside the building, and they could've flanked you or taken a hostage and then what would you have done?

This was the best way.

>>484253
Offer to pay for the damage to buildings you didn't target. Getting rid of the pirates is going to roll in your favor, and people will put up with all kinds of shit if you cover the expenses - that works out to a net gain.

fuck the council. scan for survivors. and bomb the bush camp! quickly, before they abandon it since they know we can destroy respawners quite easily.

>>484390
you do realize that the captain is currently attacking said camp right?

>>484392

I thought the bush camp was a camp other than the leatherworkers'. unless you're talking about the ground team, which may not be enough to kill every single one of them without help from the spaceship.

>>484398
The bush camp and the leatherworks are the only two pirate bases(that we know about. unlikely that they have more.) When the mission started we already figured that they had a camp outside the town(which is the bush camp) Our job originally was to gain permission to attack them. We then found out that they had taken over the leather works too. So we had to deal with that. The attack on the bush camp started when we blew up the leather works, so unless the ship has more precise weapons we would be just blowing up our own guys. The reason for not just blowing up them both with the ship? The Captain wants to have fun would be my guess. Also, the ground team is being lead by the Captain. If he needs support from the ship he can order it himself.

Hal 2013/01/11(Fri)19:11 No. 484574 ID: 0eef61
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Talia returns from shepherding the civilians away. Her eyes widen at the aftermath of the blast and I can hear the hiss of dust particles hitting them and sizzling. "We felt the tremors from that three blocks away." She whistles appreciatively. "Damn, Hal. You get results."

"I'm just a bundle of surprising competence today, aren't I?"

"It's not that," says Anka as she, Talia, and I start picking through the rubble looking for survivors. "We just weren't expecting you to be so... pragmatic."

"You blow shit up real good for a shirm," Talia agrees.

"I'm a secret agent, not an architect," I say, checking what turns out to be a finger. "The ends don't always justify the means, but whatever. It was just a building, yeah?"
"Or three," says Anka.
"And a shitload of spooked Dreimians," says Talia. "One or two of them may have peed."

"Well I'm assuming the Alliance will help the Dreimians out," I say. "With the rebuilding. Not the pee."

"Oh, certainly," says Anka. She pauses and mercy kills a pirate with a chunk of rebar through his chest. "Of course we officially were never even on this planet, but I imagine you can convince the captain or something to truss this up as some sort of Humanitarian aid thing. There are funds for rare circumstances like this."
"If giant explosions like that are rare the Unflagging is a five star steakhouse," says Talia, "I can count on one hand the missions the Captain goes on that don't end in a demolition and I only have, like, 3 fingers."
"I guess that's what we have Hal for," says Anka, giving me a playful punch on the shoulder that nearly knocks me into an I-beam. "You're basically Cap's maid."
"I don't know if your maid ever popped a bullet into your kneecap but that would possibly explain some things." Talia says. "Go tell Drakine we're not looking at any survivors. Hal and I can take it from here."
"You two need some invertebrate alone time?"
"Piss off, Canned Heat."
"Alright," Anka croons, slinging her MG over her shoulder. "You lovebirds find me when you're done here. We gotta get to the courthouse before the council works themselves into a frenzy.

Hal 2013/01/11(Fri)19:12 No. 484575 ID: 0eef61
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Talia and I creep through the wreckage, alone now. It's eerily quiet at ground zero. The lack of detritus everywhere almost makes it seem like this has been a ruin for months, not minutes.

"We've blasted a lot of buildings to bits," Talia says, "but never with the express permission of the people who owned them."

"I guess the Dreimians have their priorities straight," I say, wincing as I come down on my wounded leg.
"They're surprisingly tough little guys," says Talia. "But I'm beginning to think you can talk anyone into anything. That Diamanda chick's a lawyer or something and she's mad impressed with you. I mean, everyone's impressed."
"Are you?"
"Of course. Maybe a little in spite of myself."

We walk in silence for a bit.

I'm looking over what may be a ribcage when she asks in a way so aggressively casual it almost knocks me over like a Pribicevic love tap, "So you going to, uh, sample some ethnic flavors while you're down here? Because if by some miracle you don't manage to bag that Diamanda chick or something, my bed's still open. Y'know. If you're in the neighborhood."

>>484575
Uh, shit. It's rather hard to answer this question without implying she's second-best or that you want to screw a lot of women.

Ummmmmmm... okay. I think I got it. Tell her that you're glad she feels that way because you would be totally open for a repeat performance, and so far your use of charm has been mission-related. Something might happen if Diamanda's interested, though. You're not sure if she likes you that way or just in a sort of fangirl way.

Besides, are you even going to be down here with enough free time on your hands to do any romance?

>>484586
> It's rather hard to answer this question without implying she's second-best or that you want to screw a lot of women.

That would be more of a problem if she hadn't specifically said it was OK. As it stands, you want to say something diplomatic here, but you don't have to imply you're not interested in anyone else. Of course, you don't have to explicitly say you *are* interested, either; hence, diplomacy and charm.

"After blowing up a building in the middle of a population center, I think I'll be engaging in some diplomacy with Diamanda alright, but the whole council will be involved too, and I really don't swing that way. As for your offer, I'm *always* in the neighborhood for you."

if she asks i'm not gonna say no.

>>484575
Sex is more fun when you know the other person, and the same extensive experience that gives rise to your skill with words means you don't feel the pressing need to sample every piece of alien ass that presents itself, not when you have such attractive options at hand already.

You should observe that you can't really talk anyone into anything at all--it's just that you generally find yourself in a position to talk people into doing the right thing, and that's nothing more than a matter of clear communication.

Everyone digs a modest badass.

>>484627
You didn't talk those pirates into surrendering, after all; they had little to lose and potentially much to gain by putting up a fight.

Lay on that Charm and promise that you won't stand to leaving anyone unsatisfied, least of all her. She'll have you all to herself soon enough.

Choose your Councillor Hal 2013/01/12(Sat)00:14 No. 484722 ID: 0eef61
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"Most all of the [charm] I've been laying on her is in service of the mission, remember," I say, attempting an amorous affection. "You shoot/stab people and look good doing it, and I talk. The same extensive experience that gives rise to my skill with words doesn't necessarily mean I'm going to sample every piece of alien poon that shakes off the tree."

"That's how you got me into bed, though, isn't it?" says Talia. "So you could get past that security checkpoint."

"Well. You take what you get, especially when it's a sexy electric amazon with her own mood lighting." Her eyes flare. Bingo, Hal. "Maaaybe something will happen with some bug down the line but I'll be honest: I'm not so great with speeches and [diplomacy] as everyone says I am. I just frequently happen to be in the fortunate position of having to talk someone into the right thing, and then it's just a question of clarity."

"And bumping uglies with you is the right thing."

"You tell me." I wink one of my eyespots. "Maybe something will happen with some Dreimian or another while we're down here. The moment we're off this dustbowl I'm all yours."

"Kiss me," she says, and I do. I go for a peck but she pulls me into it. Her volcano eyes warm my carapace. It's like licking a sparkplug.
But in a good way.

She pushes me back from her. "Now go talk your way out of this mess you made, firebug."

Diamanda tells me that if I want another audience with the council at this point in time I have to convince one of the council members to petition my cause to the others. "We planned to meet you folks last time. This is going to have to be an emergency meeting and the only one who can call an emergency meeting of the council is a councillor. You need to get one of them to agree to that.

"You could appeal to Derbule, junior councillor. He's kind of cute. I don't know him that well, but the younger ones can be most amenable to others' points of view. Sometimes.

"Delanida is the motherly type, opposed to violence. Now: that may not seem like a way in but if you emphasize how the pirates won't be dead for long and no Dreimians were hurt you may have an in. Also I took care of her kids in high school so she knows me.

"Derdilus is a practical guy, the closest to someone like Drakine on the council. He's a strong possibility, but he might grill you for not just going in yourself and leaving the building standing.

"Dersichore is a traditionalist. He is going to be the hardest to convince. But if you convince him early the meeting itself should be a breeze, right? Orrr he might agree to it just so he can try to have you executed.

"Any way you slice it, I'm here to help. I've never shot a gun in my life but bureaucracy is just as likely to blow up in your face, right? And this shit I got."

Delanida.

I _think_ we can take the traditionalist with an argument that goes something like "the pirates were the ones who abused your tradition, and we rectified the problem with minimal impact on your society, if they'd managed to take hostages it'd have been much worse, socially speaking, and in any case, *as opposed to the pirates*, we're not here to stay, we're just here to get this (emphasis) off-world problem out of your hair" but I don't want to bet on that

>>484722
Hey look buddy, you're a suave Sherm Agent and that means you solve problems. Not problems like "How to take care of kids?" 'cause that would fall under motherly type ladies like Delandia. For instance, how am I gonna get the council on my side. The answer: Talk to Derdilus. And if that don't work, sway him with cunning well-constructed arguments like "No civilian casualties" and "They had heavy hardware in the building." So those pirates best hope your silver tongue ain't pointed at the council

As much as I want to say Delanida because LADIES ALL THE LADIES, I'm pretty sure Derdilus is the way to go. Especially if we can convince him that you aren't super soldiers, but three wounded soldiers who are just good at their jobs, and there was a significant chance that you might have lost the engagement, leading to the pirates going on a looting spree before making a run for it.

>>484833
Yeah I gotta agree with this. We can touch on the same points we talked about with the guard captain.

Hal 2013/01/13(Sun)00:13 No. 484929 ID: 0eef61
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"I know what you're here to do, Halaris, and my answer is no," says Derdilus. "Send someone with more authority. Send your boss. If you choose not to clue us in on any of your plans why should we hear you out after the fact?"
"It was never my intention to keep you in the dark," I say, "but the plan was spur-of-the-moment and out of desperation. We weren't some group of supersoldiers, we were three wounded aliens against an army of pirates, at least a dozen. The firefight in the streets nearly polished us off; This was the best way."
"I know that," Derdilus has been storming through the council hall trying to get rid of us for five minutes. "The council knows it, most of them. Even Dersichore knows it somewhere in his ten-inch-thick carapace. In my eyes that is not the issue. The issue is that we chose to trust you and allow you to shatter our traditions of sanctuary for all visitors, and in return you treated us like children to be kept in the dark, betrayed our trust, and bombed our city. Why didn't you come to us about this? Does the Alliance think us savages who can't make the right decision for ourselves I would have supported you, damn you."

"Sir, the pirates were aware of Hal's intervention," Diamanda protests, a little out of breath from following the councillor's fretful pacing. "We had to move fast."

"We, Scribe Diamanda?" Derdilus wheels on her. "You are not a factor in this conversation. You are not a soldier. You are a citizen of Tribe Volanthis, not of the Alliance, you are a young and inexperienced scribe, and you are overstepping your boundaries. It would behoove your career to remain silent in matters galactic."

"And it would behoove you to stop fucking running around like you've got the shits and listen to the hero who just saved your rotten old molting ass." snaps Diamanda. It's the first time I've heard her angry.

It may be the first time Derdilus hears her angry too, because it's enough to get him to freeze in his tracks.

"Choose your next words with extreme caution, Agent Halaris," he says woodenly, looking straight ahead. "I am listening."

>>484929
Try diplomacy. The whole "they had antimatter bombs and you don't come back to life" angle might work.

>>484933
Also: Every second mattered. If the scout missed his check-in time...

>>484929
You could throw the ol' "better to ask forgiveness than permission" line in there, alongside the point that you really didn't have time to convince an entire room of people. Even adults take time to use [diplomacy]. Especially adults, even. The fastest, safest way was to go straight for an official who had the power to get things done on his own.

You wanted to show them respect, and did so as much as you could without jeopardizing their safety, and their safety was your priority. Besides, you aren't THAT confident in your speech skills, to sway an entire room like that. At least now if you fuck it up, nobody will die.

>better to ask forgiveness than permission

no.

...and that's all I got, really.

>>484929
"I regret that there wasn't time to inform you, but this works out well for you. Your hands are clean; nobody can hold you accountable for any of this.

For now I would suggest publicly denouncing the Alliance's strike, expelling its representatives, and demanding both compensation for the damage caused and the immediate release of the prisoners.
Obviously the prisoners won't be released, but the demand should sate those who cling tighter to tradition.
Your traditions do not extend to protecting people who intend to willfully cause you harm, correct? The alliance will appeal your condemnation on those grounds.
Past experience suggests pirates are currently proclaiming as much even if nobody is there to listen. Rather loudly, at that.
We record their confession and provide it to you, then you absolve the Alliance of wrongdoing and we move on from there."

Let's not forget that they threatened to kill the entire town when we asked them to surrender...

You did it this way not because you were not confident they would not make the right call, but because there was just no time. Given just the ten seconds of warning they got, they were preparing to launch an all out assault to destroy the town and everyone in it. If they had even a few minutes of suspicion that something was coming, there would have been hostages and in all likelihood, casualties, and you were simply NOT prepared to take that risk. You were told that the Domestic Defender had the authority to take emergency action, and so you did the best you could to work within their system and still ensure that everyone got out of this alive. You are sorry that it was not handled strictly according to proper protocol, but given the chance you would not have done anything differently.

Say nothing about "better to ask forgiveness" and nothing about telling them to denounce the attack. You must not give them any indication that this was anything but the best possible course of action, because it was.

>>484997
This, plus the fact that you are sure that the Alliance will help with the rebuilding efforts, no Dreimian life was lost so the plan was successful on it's most important objective, and if you really need the added boost, offer that you'll suffer through any punishment they deem just that does not impede with your duties to the Alliance.

We didn't do this out of concern for our own lives; killing us is an inconvenience that just interrupts whatever we're in the middle of, like this mission. We did this because it took out the pirates with zero loss of *your* lives, because when you die you you stay dead. And we succeeded completely in that goal; no Dreimians died today.

And we even offered the pirates the opportunity to surrender before we acted, despite the impermanence of their deaths. *Nobody* died today.

You can rebuild buildings, and all the easier with financial support from the Alliance.

Even taking all that into account, we did not simply choose to act unilaterally; doing so would not respect your own autonomy. However, we could not take a plan like this to the council in advance; too many ears could listen in and report back, as evidenced by the pirate we chased down directly *from* the council chambers. So, we took this plan to Commander Drakine, who could provide it with due consideration and ultimately approval without compromising the plan and potentially allowing the pirates to take hostages.

Even with that approval, we take full responsibility for the actions we've taken today. Please let us know how we can best start providing you with aid in rebuilding that area. How can we help?

In any case, now that we have averted the immediate threat, we can happily involve the council in our plans to deal with the slightly longer-term problem, namely the respawned pirates.

Hal 2013/01/13(Sun)23:18 No. 485107 ID: 975f80
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"We didn't do this out of any concern for our safeties, Councillor," I say, mustering up every [diplomatic] bone in my body. "If you were to take out a pistol and shoot me dead on the spot it would be an inconvenience I would recover from within the hour. The concern was not my death or the death of my soldiers; it was that in the event of a failed attack on that fortress the men inside with antimatter rifles, reflective body armor, and virtual immortality would start killing Dreimians. No civilian died today. No pirate died today, at least not permanently. That plasma barrage defused the biggest threat to your tribe's survival since the Dreimians made it to the top of the food chain at the cost of a single building."

"Why did you not tell us this before the explosion?"

"With respect, sir, the last time I was in this building detailing plans there was a pirate runner inside the council chamber. In the aftermath of his capture we had a very limited time before the rest of his people understood something was wrong. When they were eventually clued in, ten seconds before the attack, they immediately threatened to start revenge killings. I am given to understand the task of the Domestic Defender is to handle pressing matters the council itself doesn't have time for. This operation was in his jursdiction and extremely time-sensitive. If the pirates had more time to realize what was happening or any sort of advance notice they would have taken hostages at best and lives at worst. If I have done anything wrong I am prepared to receive any punishment that doesn't interfere with my service to the Alliance but I am absolutely convinced I made the right call today. Given the choice again I would tear down that building with my own three claws."

Derdilus looks me up and down for a breathless minute. "Stay here, Halaris. I'll return momentarily." He turns and stalks into the council chambers.

Five minutes later he's returned with Derbule, the youngest councillor. "The council has agreed to convene and hear your case," he tells me, stiffly. "Councillor Derbule and myself believe it has merit."

"What you did today was incredible, Halaris," says Derbule. "We should be carving your name into a monument, not putting you on trial. I am of the opinion" (Derdilus is rolling his eyes) "that the best and safest way forward for Tribe Volathis is increased partnership and involvement with the Alliance, and this event proves that point. Those pirates were a pressure cooker, a disaster waiting to happen. We owe you much for defusing it."

"That being said," Derdilus interjects, "we will be convening the council and only the council, Halaris. I will keep in mind the persuasive argument you have given me, but at the insistence of my fellow councillors this will be a closed meeting."

I may not want to stir up any more disrespectful drama than I already have, but I don't know what to think about not being in the room during that meeting.

>>485107
You've done what you could, not much you can do about it but wait. This will now be diplomacy by proxy based on the case you made to Derdilus.

1. First resort was negotiation. Their reply, as can be confirmed by both scribe and constable who were there and heard it was to threaten to, and I quote "move into the city and kill every Dreimian we find", this is the reason we actually executed that last resort.
2. Cleared with constable as per local law and tradition, would have ALSO cleared it with the council as well but lacked the time and there could be another runner.
3. Stuck to our promise to both council and constable to first negotiate, only had to resort to this due to the nature of the pirate's response.
4. Not a single person was killed. Both us and them have respawners, locals do not. Buildings can be rebuilt, lives cannot. This was flashy, scary, loud and looked amazing. But if you look at it more carefully it is extremely accurate, necessary, and completely without casualties. The damage was entirely to buildings.
5. Didn't actually have opportunity or time to even properly finish our original audience with the council because we had to run out of council building to chase a runner for the pirates.
6. Those pirates were so ruthless that they threatened to slaughter the town giving them shelter, holding every person in the town hostage. That is when they still believed the people of the town are actively giving them shelter because we DID stop the runner, alive! Any further discussion would risk them finding out that their guest-hood has been revoked and based on their threats and their criminal history would have resulted in retaliation against innocent civilians.
7. A fort with auto-guns, respawners, heavy weaponry, and 50 soldiers vs 3 injured people.
8. They were using anti-matter weapons, those things go through wall after wall killing the people behind them. Even if 3 injured us could take out the entire fort innocents could get killed by stray antimatter shots.

Indeed, it's out of your claws now. Trying to go against the will of the council now would most definitely lose points with them.
You've got two votes out of four on your side now, so relax.
Those two can probably convince Delanida no problem.

>>485116
Aww, took too long to type.

Anyways, can still bring up the above but preface with "understandable, I also submit a report on the matter, here were the list of my reasonings" (maybe give it in writings as "evidence" for them to discuss)

The key here (and that isn't something to outright say but to make understandable via using terms like people rather then <insert race> or the like. Is that it wasn't a "oh they are primitives we can go over their heads", but criminals threatening violence against innocent people and immediate and flashy action needed to disarm them, and was coordinated with local law enforcement, and both local and foreign law enforcement agree that peaceful arrest first should be negotiated first.

You know what? I think the best thing right now would be to drop it, leave it in the hands of Derdilus, and tell them that you'll abide by whatever decision they make. We shouldn't push our luck any more than we already are, as any more arguments would only serve to reinforce the image that we keep pushing people around to get way.

cool beans. thank him for having his priorities straight and leave. contact the ship and ask how the bush camp raid is going.

>>485119
Basically agree with the report part of this. Though to stay with 'tradition', its probably best to ask if you may have a moment with scribe Diamanda to turn your formal statement into a poem.

Hal 2013/01/15(Tue)01:10 No. 485411 ID: 975f80
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"I understand," I say. "Could I have a moment with scribe Diamanda to fashion my argument into a poem?"

"If you wish to pass the time while we debate," says Derdilus. "But this is an emergency meeting, one of the council's first in four years. I don't think anyone is going to waste their time finding a rhyme for 'irrefutable'."

"Indisputible," Diamanda replies as if on cue. Derdilus gives her a look. "Sorry, sir. And for the outburst."

"Your youthful enthusiasm is to be commended, scribe" Derdilus puts the kind of spin on that 'commended' a delter puts on his frag grenade. "Just this once, therefore, I'm prepared to dismiss that little incident as merely a growing pain."

"The council will come around, I know it," says Derbule. "Delanida and Dersichore just need time to, er, simmer. Thank you for entrusting your cause to me, honored guest. I won't let the Alliance down."
"Okay, Derbule," Derdilus brushes past him into the council chambers. "Let's go before Agent Halaris has to wipe the drool off his cloak hem. This may take a while, Agent. If you choose to leave the hall we will dispatch someone to find you. I'd tell you to stay in the city until then but you will clearly do as you wish regardless."
Derbule spares them one more bow before he closes the door with a definitive click.

Hal 2013/01/15(Tue)01:10 No. 485412 ID: 975f80
File 135824104979.png - (260.51KB , 800x600 , 43.png )

"Oof," I say. Oof, I think. Derdilus has a stare that could fell a watuskin at five hundred feet and the bedside manner to polish it off in three minutes.
"I have an okay feeling about this," says Diamanda, brightly dispelling my cloud of cimmerian concern. She seems a good deal more optimistic about the whole thing. "You respecting the council's wishes and staying out here shows that you trust our judgement enough to believe we'll come to the right decision on our own, eventually. I'm sure they'll appreciate it. I mean, I certainly do."
"Derbule seems... eager to help."
"Looks like," says Diamanda. "He's an interesting twist. Maybe I should get to know him better; this is basically the first strong opinion I've heard him say."
"He seemed kind of cute for a governor," I rib her.
"What do you know from cute about the Dreimians?" says Diamanda.
"I don't know. Cool hat."
"I rock it better."
"Nice, uh, mandibles."
"Maybe we go in for weird tumors or something."
"Do you?"
"Well, no," she says. "It's scent, mostly. But I'll think about him later. Let's just say I've got other prospects lined up first."

It looks like I've got some time to kill while I wait for the dust to clear from the Council's little territorial tiff. I could go relocate my merry band of canned killers, I suppose, and return to that charming little tavern the Something or Other Cheesewheel, or perhaps spend some quality time trying to get into the puffy pants of the young scribe here.

Puffy pants vote here.

>>485412
Do you even have a sense of smell? Tell her about what Shirms like. Then ask her if those prospects of hers might possibly include any dashing secret agent Shirms. Maybe throw just a pinch of [charm] in there, to keep yourself from putting your foot in your mouth. Hey, you could even use it as a lead-in to asking her out. Like, you could suggest talking about your respective cultures over dinner.

How's that leg doing, by the way? Need any medical attention on it?

Also it occurs to me that, while you do know that you're sexually compatable with all the races in the Alliance, can you say that about Dreimians?

go to a medic before you get gangrene or something.

Spend time being chatty with the ms puffy pants, but the timing seems awkward to fully plot a course into them. Just ask her about what she'd like to spend time doing with you for now. There has to be something to do around here while the dust settles.

Taking care of your wounds first seems important as well, if you haven't taken care of it yet.

Hal 2013/01/16(Wed)01:56 No. 485690 ID: 3f989a
File 135833019139.png - (385.90KB , 800x600 , 44.png )

I decide to go get my leg patched up. Diamanda, ever the charming hostess, tells me she can call in a favor to get it looked at right away by Drapus, one of the better horse doctors in town.

He admits he doesn't know much about no blue-blood alien bugs, but this looks like a simple carapace puncture, easily fixed. "You'd be one of those aliens what blew up the Leatherworks, then?" he says as he washes up.
"I mean, I didn't press the button or anything," I say. "But yes."
"Fella broke his arm because of that," says Drapus conversationally. "He was up on a ladder tending to his laundry, got spooked right off. Still, I suppose better setting a bone than tagging a bunch of shooting victims' toes."

"That looks painful," Diamanda grimaces.
"I'll get over it." I flex my leg. "Fun fact: shirm basically don't have much feeling the knee and below. Guys used to bash each other over the heads with our forelegs over potential mates with them. Or something. Shirm ladies go in for a dude with big kneecaps."
"Are yours big for a shirm?"
"It's never the size that counts, Scribe Diamanda."
"So they're itty bitty."
"I never said that. What do Dreimian girls go for?"
"Scent," she says automatically. "Y'know how we all look pretty similar?"
"Yeah."
"Well, you're not just racist. We tell each other apart from scent too. And, uh. Nevermind."
"What?"
"It's weird."
"I'm an armored squid from space; I know weird."
She covers her mouth with a sleeve. "Your blood smells really good."
"Does it, now? Do those prospects we talked about earlier include a certain dashing shirm secret agent?"
"Is an agent all that secret when he blows up a building with a space laser?"
"There are still some things I've kept under my cloak."
"Suppose I'm a little interested in finding those things out."
"Suppose I was interested in divulging alliance secrets."
"You'd go double agent for a humble scribe?"
"No, but I'd bash my share of males on the head with my forelegs for you."
"That I'd like to see." She grins. "Okay, Agent Halaris. Buy me a drink at the tavern?"

Hell yes.

As a wise man once said: Hell yes.

>>485690
You would be delighted to.

stupid question.

Begin [Charm] spam!

Hal 2013/01/16(Wed)23:58 No. 485851 ID: 3f989a
File 135840951217.png - (231.08KB , 800x600 , 45.png )

Drapus says maybe I should stay off that leg but 1) what does he know about a shirm anyway and 2) I have a date with a petite primrose pillbug to see to.

We sit in a corner booth and Diminai, that waitress I met earlier, comes by to get our orders. Diamanda asks for a pale ale and Diminai informs us with a wink she'll get that for us on the bar's tab.

"No booze?" asks Diamanda.
"I need my senses sharp in case I need to talk to the council some more later," I say. "We ain't out of the woods yet."
"You could just leave," says Diamanda. "They'd maybe shake their fists at you as you took off but it's not like they'd have much in the way of power over you even if you did break the law."
"A whole big multitude of factors keep me planetside," I scoot further into the a-little-bit-too-small booth as the drinks arrive and I crank up the [charm].
"Are some of those factors more sober than you normally like them?" Diamanda sips from her tankard. "Because if all this is on the house I'm planning on getting mildly sloppy."
"I somehow can't find it in me to raise an objection," I say.
She laughs. "Then keep it coming, o big blue benefactor."
"Alliteration. I like that."
"Reminds you of you?"
"Reminds me of how sharp you are with words."
"Look who's talking."
"Seriously. Back there with the councillor? You really helped me out. You have an excellent way of saying 'fucking'. Real hard-hitting."
"Sometimes in rhetoric you gotta bring out the big guns." She leans forward a little. I catch myself wondering what's going on underneath that top. "'Fucking' tends to get people's attention."
"Hmm." This one knows how to play the game. "You like attention?"
"Depends on who and how atttentive." She stretches a little and I involuntarily follow the gesture. "I think you're doing fine. Where were you? Big multitude of factors?"
"Well, you know. Image is important. I'm representing the Alliance in a veeery delicate situation."
"You're talking to a lawyer here, Hal," Diamanda takes another gulp. "I know how important image is to people. And so do you." She grins and leans her head against her hand. "I think I can see through you, Agent."
"Oh, no. And here I am without my lucky underwear."
"Not like that." She giggles. "And it's not that you aren't a hero or anything. You're a hero, all right. But that whole modest 'I only want the right thing' shit you've been tossing around? Acting all humble? You're not humble. You bet you're God's three legged gift to women, don't you?"
"Do I?"
"You do. And it works, doesn't it? I saw that wink Diminai gave you. And that Delter you're with was on you like orange on rice."
"Your rice is orange?"
"Yours isn't? How many girls have you gotten with the whole smooth shirm routine, Halaris? Be honest."

>>485851
"A gentleman never tells, and it wouldn't do those wonderful women justice to remember them as numbers."

>lets see if I can write well for this shirm...

Honestly? I'm offended. First at the implication that I wouldn't want the right thing regardless of the means, and second that you'd consider this some kind of a routine I throw around. I'll do what is right, or as close as I can manage, and really can't help but be damn smooth all the while. Sometimes that involved being appealing to the ladies while keeping a respectful and necessary distance, and other times I got into their pants as a vital part of the mission regardless of how I felt about them.

But usually? I just do my job, and if there is someone worth being charming to during the course of that I do so, I'm honest as I can be about it, and if they want to go further than that then I oblige them.

But to answer your question... Even if you defined "gotten" well enough I wouldn't have a number to give you, because I don't go through my life counting such things... but "a lot" would be fairly accurate, yes.

you'd never kiss and tell, would you?

>>485851
She asked you a straightforward question. Don't dodge it.

"Not as many as you might think. This may come as a surprise, but there are entire planets out there where being a squid head and three legs is considered unattractive, no matter how heroic I am. Sure, I make the effort to leave a good impression wherever I go, but if I make anything more than friends it is both lucky and a privilege. "

Oh, I'd like to bring up the issue of taking a drunk girl home to have sex. Isn't that frowned upon due to consent issues? I don't know how you normally would avoid the moral issue unless she gives you consent ahead of time or something. I guess you could just wait until she sobers up before going all the way...

>>485927
Agreed, aside from that it is also a way to turn her down without hurting her feelings (probably).
Remember you did strongly imply to a certain crewmate you wouldn't tap that one.

>>485927
Nah we're good. She wouldn't be drinking much before the council sees us, and we won't have enough time to do anything until after it concludes.

>>486023
We did no such thing. We implied that we probably would, actually.

Hal 2013/01/21(Mon)00:44 No. 486627 ID: f707c7
File 135875785697.png - (318.25KB , 800x600 , 46.png )

"Honestly, I'm offended."
She covers her mouth with one sleeve. "Oh, no."
"Both at the implication that I wouldn't want the right thing regardless and at the idea that I throw some kind of routine around. I just do as close to what I think is right and if there is someone I find charming, I do my best to be charming back. I don't go through my life counting these things."

She starts making a long, slow air jerk with one hand, rolling her eyes back into her head.

"All right, well, look," I say. "You wouldn't kiss and tell, would you?"

"Fourteen," she says, immediately. "Once two at the same time. Number nine, Dirkus, is four tables away from us right now. You do go through your life counting those things because everyone counts these things and I need a solid integer, Hal."

"Thirty four," I say, because sometimes you just have to admit you're not as smooth as you think you are.

She grins. "Now didn't that feel good to get off your chest? Torso? Pseudopod? Whatever?

I shrug. "I leave a good impression."

"You play the game, Hal, and you play it good, but you don't need to with me." She stretches, shamelessly. "We both know what you're trying to do, and if getting me in bed is suddenly the Right Thing or Just Doing Your Job or something, who am I to stand in the way of the greater good? But if you just want to fuck me, then skip the spiel and say you want to fuck me. This ain't my first rodeo, cowboy, and once the council finds you innocent, which they will, because you are, and once you down a drink or two, which you should, because you've already said everything you need to say, maybe you could get yourself a room, and you could tell me where it is, and I could come over," she leans forward, "and I could give you a few riding lessons."

>>486627
I dunno Hal, are YOU feeling very seduced here? It's not like you are completing a scavenger hunt. You're not exactly desperate, and while honesty is one thing, this girl is approaching callous in presentation. She was a lot cuter when she was still playing the game. As they say, its not the destination, its the journey.

...okay.

>>486627
"My fair lady, you've given me some talking lessons here. Me of all people, who knew there was more to learn. I must say, I may fear you and more of your lessons. But you teach them so well and so cleverly. For the first time in years, I have been humbled in my own court. Take me out to the yard and tell me how the lawyers buck their rides."

>>486627
OUT-PLAYED.

Answer her question by ordering a drink.

>>486710
seconded

>>486630
Yeah, this is really kind of offputting. You sincerely aren't going for some kind of high score, and you need to remember to be careful not to let people pressure you into things with nearly the same methods you use to pressure them. Turn her down gently.

"You know, it might be a game we all play, but personally I find the game at least as fun as the destination. I happen to have a good memory, but that's in no small part because of all the memorable people I've met; I don't think I'd ever refer to someone I'd romanced as 'number nine'. There's something to be said for actually playing the game, and I'd think that someone with as much of a gift for words as you have would appreciate a bit of verbal foreplay. To answer your blunt question with a blunt answer, no, I didn't particularly want to "skip the spiel and say I wanted to fuck you"; I was looking forward to enjoying a bit of romance, and I thought that after the impressive displays you've put on in the past you might as well. Congratulations on an impressive bit of verbal maneuvering indeed, but I can't say I find the idea of being 'number fifteen' particularly romantic at the moment. Have a nice day."

(This is meant genuinely, and not as a "hard to get" tactic. I'd say if she decides to treat this as "hard to get" and come back later with a bit more romance in mind, by all means enjoy yourself, but if not I don't think you need another notch in your bedpost quite this desperately. Romance is not dead quite yet, but she just tried to take it out back and put it out of its misery.)

>>486743
Actually, that's the problem: she *isn't* using the same kind of methods. She's just crassly asking for sex, which is just about the polar opposite.

Hal 2013/01/21(Mon)23:17 No. 486825 ID: f707c7
File 135883905637.png - (326.10KB , 800x600 , 47.png )

Chivalry remains alive and well, headvoices mine, but perhaps it should fight its battles with a little more tact.
Some women have tentacles, some have fur, some find it sexy to play at the intricacies of romance, and some find it sexy just to take the pretense away and tell you exactly what they want. I wouldn't turn a lady down for an extra head; why should a little directness get my panties in a bunch? She is by no means the most aggressive woman I've had; if you'll recall correctly Talia tackled me.

"I've been outplayed like this twice before and only twice before," I say, signalling for a drink, "and you're lucky I find that incredibly attractive."
"I find your willingness to drop the mask for me a little just as attractive." I feel her foot rest against my thigh under the table. "Hal, hey. I know you love chasing girls almost as much as what happens at the end of the race. It just so happens that I love chasing dudes. I know you don't just see us as crusty gym socks or anything. You are God's three legged gift." A saucy smile slinks across her face. "Well, you are if your bite is as good as all the barking you've been doing."
"I don't actually have teeth."
She winks. "You can just outsource the biting to me."

She looks up, and I turn to see Delanida, councillor of Tribe Volanthis, working her way through the bar, with Talia and Anka in tow.
"To be continued," Diamanda whispers, then straightens up and tilts her head with deference to Delanida, who returns the gesture.

"I hope we aren't interrupting anything," says Anka, sounding as delighted as always to be interrupting something, "but the councillor here told us she wanted to see you."
"And it wasn't exactly hard to puzzle out where you were going to be," says Talia, with all the grace of a weed whacker.

"We have reviewed your case, Halaris," says Delanida, stiffly, "and we wish to make it very clear that under no circumstances does the leadership of Tribe Volanthis endorse what happened here today. The Alliance and the Council have worked closely on many occasions and although we anticipate a continuation in that relationship the events of this afternoon were entirely by your volition and in no way set any sort of precedent, agreement, or commendation. That being said," she sighs, "in light of the zero effective fatalities and the selectively localized damage of your activity, we are prepared to overlook the breaches of etiquette that occurred today and voted unanimously to pursue no charges or disciplinary action of any kind."

>>486825
So basically he's saying we're in the clear but goddamn it don't do that again. Also, she is being very formal here, so you should as well. Put your [diplomatic] face on.

Thank her for their leniency, and that you hope this does not hinder any future dealings they have with the Alliance.

>>486825
Express your pleasure at the councils wisdom, yada yada, diplomacy. Find out what the catch is.

cool beans. now continue with what you were doing before they came.

Thank them for their gracious response, and ask if you could take any steps to help smooth things over a bit.

Perhaps mention that this is only the military side of things and hint that, swiftness is generally considered the best case for various reasons.

Perhaps a "We deal with actual threats to people's lives as swiftly and quickly as possible; discomfort is only temporary," and leave it... hanging with all the implications.

Hal 2013/01/22(Tue)21:25 No. 487050 ID: f707c7
File 135891875776.png - (179.76KB , 800x600 , 48.png )

"I thank the council for their leniency," I tell her [diplomatically]. "If I could take any steps to smooth things over..."

"Simply refrain from destroying any more buildings for the duration of your stay, Halaris, and you will have the council's gratitude," says Delanida, sharply. She sighs. "And off the record, Halaris, I apologize for the actions of myself and Dersichore. We... overreacted to your actions, I believe. If dreimian lives had been lost Tribe Volanthis would have retracted its support of the alliance without question... but I suppose they were not, and I suppose that means we owe you our thanks."
"Thank you, councillor."
"Just warn us next time, dear."

I'm about to return to Diamanda when I get an incoming call from the Captain. "Sorry, Di. I have to take this."
"Take your time," she says, then asks Talia and Anka, "Do either of you two want drinks? Hal's got it."
"I can't drink," Talia says sullenly.
"Heck yeah I want a drink," says Anka. "Sorry, Tal."

"This is Qalwitness News reporting to you live from the smoking crater that used to be Pirate HQ," the commander tells me over the wire. "We just finished doing awesome shit that probably made whatever you were doing look boring and also stupid by comparison."
"I got to blow a building up from space," I say.
"I heard," he says. "Is my rollicking surprise party coming along nicely or should we go warm up the engines before the mobs start gathering?"
"Just tell us the color streamers you want, sir."
"I knew I could count on you. And by that I mean I didn't, because I barely even know you. But I know my gut and it told me, Captain, you should shoot this man in the head and make him do all your paperwork. Thank you, Gut. And thank you, Hal."
"Thank you, sir."
"Everybody gets one. And stop repeating me. If I wanted an echo chamber I'd talk into the hollowed out skulls of all those dead pirates. We're going to rearm and regroup then be in town by midnight, but because of how well this mission did I'm going to give everyone the weekend shore leave before we're back out in the sky. Enjoy it and if you want to launch any more space lasers don't hesitate to give me a call."
"Of course, sir."
"Il capitano out. Wait."
"Sir?"
"Blue streamers. Ok, now I'm out."

I hang up. "We've got the weekend to spend before we have to jet out again."
Anka fistpumps.
"Well if you don't have to get up early tomorrow," says Diamanda, "do you guys want to blow this popsicle stand and head to the Tashak den?"
"Tashak?"
"Tashak is Dreimian hookah stuff and I say very yes," Anka tells me. "Oh my god, I've always wanted to try it."
"I don't know," says Talia.
"Talia, c'mooon," says Anka. "It's not like booze! You can actually do this stuff too."

>>487050
This is going to go down bad, I can just tell. When we're done with our little high bug trip we'll be in the middle of some serious shit.

Let's go get high then.

>>487050
Is she unsure because she doesn't want to hang around and watch you hit on Diamanda(kinda doubt it honestly), or is she unsure because she's not keen on drugs? Or something else? Use your [intuition] to figure it out. Could be an important detail. Construct your argument for her to come appropriately. If it's because she's not into drugs, you can tell her she doesn't have to go all in with it if she doesn't want to. If she's not keen on watching you hit on Diamanda you can joke about not making out in front of her with literally all the girls.

I am totally waiting for the other shoe to drop, but we should probably go anyway. No sense backing out of a great time just due to a little paranoia.

okay. just don't smoke too much if this is your first try. pace yourself. you probably know the deal already.

Going on a drug bender seems like a bad idea here; not on general principles, but on the very specific principle that you're still at least somewhat on a mission here, so maintaining a clear head seems like a good idea. What if the pirates come calling?

How about telling Diamanda something like this: "I feel like I want to keep a clear head for a while longer, just in case something comes up; we are *technically* still on mission. Besides, I'd really like to finish the diplomatic negotiations we were talking through earlier; I think we'd managed to cut through all the wordplay and figure out what we really wanted."

Dude, you guys are uptight. This is clearly a more enlightened age, I think we can relax pretenses. Anyway, hookah doesn't get you high, it's tobacco. Go ahead, convince the hesitant lady that she doesn't have to smoke if she doesn't want to, but she should join the fun. Maybe we can get a threesome going. Have fun!

We should get some blue streamers set up for the captain before we go there.
Demerits are bad, after all.
Just need a few people on rooftops to throw them down at him; maybe we can get volunteers at the den.

You are a winner. You should go do drugs.

Hal 2013/02/24(Sun)23:33 No. 495925 ID: a2d9b1
File 136177760017.png - (128.23KB , 800x600 , 49.png )

"I feel like a winner, and I think it's time to debunk a few myths about winners re: the recreational use of drugs," I say. "Lead on, Diamanda."

We head to hit the Hookah House, dragging Talia grumblingly along. My intuition tells me she's not keen on seeing this little bug lady seduce her crush, but Anka tells her that she is not ruining this for her and kind of drags her along. "You haven't gotten out of your armor-plated skull in months, Talia. Come ooon."

We reach the place and Diamanda pays our way in. A crowd of dazed Dreimians congregate in sleepy, happy heaps around hoses that stick out of the floor with no identifiable source.

"Okay, Super Agent Halaris," she says, winking and pulling an unused hose out to length. "How about you take the first dose and show us what it's all about?"

>>495925
"After all this action I think it's a fine change of pace that I embarrass myself in front of everyone, so I will take you up on that offer."

Might want to sit down before you inhale. ...how does a Shirm sit?

Aw yeah hit dat shit shrigga

don't overinhale, now.

Remember the words of your predecessor, Hal, and get buzzed, not stoned, so you can perform the horizontal waltz later.

420 blaze it faggot

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)21:21 No. 496173 ID: 57319f
File 136185607936.png - (88.12KB , 800x600 , 50.png )

"Well, I guess it's only fair that I embarrass myself in front of everyone after being so cool today." I take the hose.

"Oh, don't worry, Hal, you embarrass yourself in front of me all the time," says Anka. Talia punches her in the arm.

Okay; I've done this sort of thing before. I breathe deep.

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)21:21 No. 496174 ID: 57319f
File 136185609086.png - (227.36KB , 800x600 , 51.png )

I don't know if it's working.
Hmmm, maybe it is.

hmmmmmmmmmm
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
mmmmmy ears are ringin'.
wait i don't have ears.

whoaaa. is that my voice? or wait; is that my think-voice?
also if we're talking about what's mine, if we're going on that tangent: is that MY hand? hahahahaha it looks so tiny ahahaha

wow, this is some strong shit

"Is It Working? Hal?"

ooo its talia
man her claws look really nice right now
wait did i think that or did i say that?
"You said it.

Okay maybe I do want a hit or two of this."

>>496174
Don't bogart the bong, man. Pass that shit.

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)21:46 No. 496181 ID: 57319f
File 136185758361.png - (198.57KB , 800x600 , 52.png )

i pass the pipe. i moooove the love on down the circle. hit this shit, talia.
"Yessir."
that's an order.
"Yessir."
also anka.

haaaaaa hair is so crazy. why do humans have hair, anka?
"Evolution?"
its crazy
your hair looks like a bird
"You are high as fuck, my friend."

ok, but your hair totally looks like a bird

then all of us smoke a lot and talk??? its cool

you guys are fucking space badasses its ridiculous

"You're ridiculous Hal"
"In a good way"

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)21:46 No. 496182 ID: 57319f
File 136185760298.png - (197.92KB , 800x600 , 53.png )

"Hail the conquering heroes!"
when did the captain and belding get here? hey
"Just now. They got here just nowowow."
oh. cool.
"Agent Halaris! What is the situation here? Where are my streamers?

What's that smell?"

>>496182
Drugs, sir. We are high as fuck.

>>496182
I suggest Anka not try it. If it gets electric space rock monsters and indestructible crab people high, it'll probably make a human dissolve.

>>496182
Pass him the pipe. The circle of love must grow!

"I got your streamers riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight here, sir." Get him the pipe.

>>496182
Still waiting on the blue ones, sir. They had only had red and cerulean on hand.

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)22:53 No. 496208 ID: 57319f
File 136186161048.png - (332.19KB , 800x600 , 54.png )

they only had red and cerulean on hand, sir. i put in an order for some blues.

and the smell is dreimian hyperweed, and we're high, sir.
"That's against regulations, Agent Halaris."
sorry, sir.
"You had better get me so high I forget."

then we do that.

more people from the raiding party show up and things get louder and rowdier but the dreimians are cool with it.
they're so happy all the time i love these little guys

i guess that pink qal is belding's gf? that's nice

"this is crazy"
that was talia.
"i'm ok with you having sex with diamanda hal, i think"
maybe don't talk so loud
"awwww come on you know you're prouda yourself. just promise me we're still a thing"
a thing?
"a friends with benefits thing i dunno"
oh totally
"cool
ok cool
you're cool"
you too talia

theres music on the whole time its really nice; wait, what time is it?
"pretty late we've been here for like 2 hours"
ok
who said that
"anka"
are you going to melt or anything anka?
"naw i'm feelin pretty good"
cool just thought i would check

Hal 2013/02/25(Mon)22:57 No. 496212 ID: 57319f
File 136186184704.png - (118.18KB , 800x600 , 55.png )

it starts to wind down and belding and pink lady head out
shes cute good for him

theres something warm and soft on my leg what is that

oh it's diamanda's boobs
theyre nice
"do you like the fauna here on Faro 8?"
its great but i wouldnt mind getting a better feel for the flora
i dont think i say that last part out loud??
"wanna get out of here?"

>>496212
Sure thing babe.

Hal 2013/02/26(Tue)00:05 No. 496228 ID: 57319f
File 136186590084.png - (9.60KB , 800x600 , 56.png )

we go and get a room at the inn and i tell them everyone else will be along soon and diminai sort of raises and lowers her eyebrows at me as diamanda pulls me upstairs.

we're two steps in when she jumps me and if she was a couple feet taller i think one of us would have broken a bone.

ok today was a good day good night everyone

oh fuuuuuck

...go to sleep, she can't do much to you anyway.

>>496291
Dude, she was totally fine with just fucking.

I think that's actually one of the pirates. SHOOT! If it's one of yours, they'll be fine. If it's a pirate, you'll save your friends' life!