Are you single? :D

Why are you being transferred? Is this a promotion? Retaliation or punishment? Did you move for personal reasons?

>>863274
Do you have a tragic backstory? Every Detective need a tragic backstory.

Are you a smoker? How good of a shot are you? What's your reputation?

1/3 Felix 2018/01/30(Tue)18:33 No. 863408 ID: c0641d
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>>863276
I recently broke up with my boyfriend, actually. It was me, not him, if you were wondering.

>>863312
Not unless you count the breakup. I’d say the reason it had to happen was decently out there as far as reasons to break up go, but… eh.

>>863279
Officially, one of the nearby cities was doing a diversity program, and with my new, er, status, I was eligible to volunteer for the position of the transfer they would be receiving for it. But really, I just wanted someplace to escape to where my coworkers don’t have numerous memories of working with… the old me. Yeah, things got awkward quickly in Philly after word of my decision got out. Anyways, just about everyone knows that the transfer program was just a convenient opportunity for me to do just that.

2/3 Felix 2018/01/30(Tue)18:34 No. 863409 ID: c0641d
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>>863327
Never smoked anything, but I’ve been trying to kick a chewing tobacco habit, if that counts.
I’m a decent shot, but I tend to prefer CQC if it can be helped, assuming “taze ‘em” doesn’t work out.
And I wouldn’t say that I had a big reputation back at the PPD (I mean, if you didn’t count the stuff that led to me transferring out in the first place), except that I was one of the more competent detectives in the district, which I guess could be saying a lot, but then I don’t know what standards other cities operate under.

Come to think of it, I actually need to… to do some… research… on… hm…

3/3 Felix 2018/01/30(Tue)18:35 No. 863410 ID: c0641d
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… Okay.

>I recently broke up with my boyfriend, actually. It was me, not him
Rrright. You call yourself a detective? Work on your bluff skill, it's important for interrogation!

>the old me
Context plz

>>863410
OK. Assess. What are you looking at?
We got a potential stiff and two individuals of the law enforcement persuasion.
Possibly CSI. You may want to get involved or least stop to see what's wrong.

>numerous memories of working with… the old me. Yeah, things got awkward quickly in Philly after word of my decision got out.
You had a sex change? You became a furry? You were brought back from the dead? You converted religions? Come on, give us some details to work with.

Oh, so you like men? Cool. What happened with you and your man? Give us some context.

Aaaand off to your first case? Wow that was quick. Let's see what you are made of them.

1/2 Felix 2018/01/31(Wed)23:02 No. 863754 ID: c0641d
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>>863413
>>863453
>>863452
… The first one. Our relationship was fairly straight until I decided I didn’t want to live my life as a woman anymore. (And what the hell even is a “furry?” Some new slur?)

>>863413
I meant what I said in the “it’s not you, it’s me” way.

>>863444
>>863453
I had pulled up alongside the scene, and was getting my raincoat when the chihuahua officer knocked on my window.

2/2 Felix 2018/01/31(Wed)23:03 No. 863757 ID: c0641d
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“Eh… could you move along, civilian? You are blocking the road, and that is muy bad! Comprende?”

>>863757
You got your badge, right?

>>863754
Important question: HOW did you change your gender? Is it just a formality and you're still biologically female, did you install a permanent dildo, did you get genome therapy, or did you use magic? Because if it's the last one, that might explain why you're hearing voices from another dimension. Where "hairless apes" (one of our slurs, don't call us that) rule the world. Badly. I mean, REALLY badly, if your world leaders were half as insane as ours, you would have pointed your ass at the nearest gangbanger and begged them to @#$% you into death. And then they would have turned out to BE your world leader, because... yeah.

>>863757
Detective Culbarne, I just moved here today. What's the situation?

>And what the hell even is a “furry?” Some new slur?
Close enough.

>>863757
Show your badge and identify yourself to your fellow officer.

Make sure officer chihuahua knows you're reaching for your badge so it doesn't get misconstrued as reaching for a weapon.

Not to be racist or anything, but who thought that a chiwawa cop would be a good idea?
Can you identify yourself?

1/3 Felix 2018/02/06(Tue)14:11 No. 865210 ID: c0641d
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>>863389
If you were trying not to be racist, you failed miserably. Chihuahuas - and the other races native south of the border, for that matter - are people, too.

>>863775
I’ve gotten surgery up top, but not down- Wait, why do you need to know that?! I’m not on a quest for romance or anything. And… I’m going to try and forget everything else you just said. (Maybe I am going crazy if my psyche is drilling me on whether I used magic, which, you know, doesn’t exist.)

>>863759
>>863775
>>863806
I present my field ID.

“Detective Culbarne, I’m transferring here tonight, actually. What's the situation?”

“Oh! … Señorita Culbarne? Que? I thought I was supposed to greet a señor?”

“Gah… I really need to get my ID updated. I’m trans.”

“Ah… Of course, sir! Dónde está…”

2/3 Felix 2018/02/06(Tue)14:11 No. 865213 ID: c0641d
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“Aquí!”

After fishing around in his pockets for a minute, he produced what appeared to be a folded up script.

“Welcome to the Grimsborough police station - ah, I was supposed to greet you at the police station,” he said. “My name is Officer Paco Fernandez, and I will be your guide… Let us skip this part for now, obviously. Y de este modo adelante… Now that I have introduced you to the crew, the chief wants me to tell you that if you are able tonight, you will be partnering with Detective Jones. He is currently… investigating… Huh.”

3/3 Felix 2018/02/06(Tue)14:12 No. 865214 ID: c0641d
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“Eheh, welcome to your first assignment, I guess!”

Oy vey…

>Wait, why do you need to know that?!
We don't, frankly. He's a bit of an insensitive ass sometimes, sorry about that.

>>865214
Right. What's do we know so far, then?

Welp, that's a first, and i hugelly apologise to all the chihuahuas of the world.

May as well get to work.