Githra Ushak 2016/05/03(Tue)19:15 No. 720799 ID: 265534
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An empty hall. The light is still shining in, so it's not very intimidating in here just yet.

Pick up the sword, but be wary of traps.

>>720799
Take a quick masturbation break before you get too far in and there's too many monsters in the way.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/03(Tue)19:48 No. 720816 ID: 265534
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>Pick up sword

It's rusted and broken, but a jagged piece of metal with a handle is still a weapon.

>Masturbate before there's too many monsters

Suggesting this BEFORE the bloodshed is lunacy.

how's the skull? wear it as a hat for +1 head armor. then continue

>>720820
Too small for hat. Perfet size to toss at first thing you see... For intimidation value.

>>720816
Tie bone in hair.

Then go find some things to kill so you can get yourself all hot and bothered.

>>720816
Go right.

Check inventory. Even champions have enough sense to bring some tools for events where power comes from precision.

... You didn't bring ^&*( with you, did you.

What gear do you have on you?

Search for hidden trap mechanisms.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/04(Wed)01:05 No. 720901 ID: 265534
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>Take skull
A human skull. Not worth much as a trophy if you didn't kill it.

>Go right
Right is gone.

>Check inventory

Bearskin mantle
Bearskin sarong
Leather footwraps
Leather chestwraps
Broken rust sword
Human Skull

Maybe Githra should have brought something else, like a water skin filled with mother's milk or a big satchel of cowardice.

>>720901
Slime above! Trick it into falling and then put the skull in it.

Throw worthless non-trophy skull at ceiling slime to assess hostility. If it's harmless, or thereby distracted, jump up onto the broken stairs, because the best loot is probably in the hardest-to-reach places.

Use the skull as a bowl for the slimes and then beat them into slime-omelets with the sword.

>Maybe Githra should have brought something else
like a weapon for example.

well it looks like you can go down or keep going right and maybe up if you can climb up there. I'd say up if you can, right if you can't because with all these slimes around I'd rather not have to worry about having a slime land on my head every 10 feet. Oh yeah there are slimes everywhere here like the one right above the broken column right where the stair start to go down.

Bash smiles with rust sword.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/04(Wed)11:15 No. 720950 ID: 265534
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Githra hurls the skull at the slime stuck to the ceiling and it splorts from the impact, falling to the floor.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/04(Wed)11:16 No. 720951 ID: 265534
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A graceful and deliberate dodge prevents any contact with the skull-infused globule.

>>720951
Now it is a slime with a skull in it and thus twice as cool! Cut a strip of your sarong off and feed it to the slime, see if it melts clothing. Good to know if it melts clothing. Also flesh. Don't cut a strip of flesh off.

Just stomp the @#$%er.

just stab the damn thing until it dies. Get an idea how shit your sword is and how tough these little shits can be.

Bodyslam the slime.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/04(Wed)14:09 No. 720980 ID: 265534
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The slime proves incredibly untough, rupturing on contact with the sword swing and splattering all over the rubble.

well grab the half a skull and knock down the other hanging slime and take out both slimes. Then we can move on.

>>720980
Best get the other two if they're so EZ.

>>720980
Scrape up some of the goo's remains in the skull, and wave it mockingly at the other two.

Then use the skull as a goblet and take a drink of victory.

>>720980
REMOVE SLIME

kill remaining slimes, gain XP.

>>720985
>drink
>acid slime
Bad idea, bro.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/04(Wed)18:03 No. 721008 ID: 265534
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>kill slimes

The other slimes are dispatched and Githra climbs up the broken staircase to the room above.

Investigate the room. Anything to the east?

>>721008
Can you read those runes? Does touching the red shiny orb do anything?

...can you pry the orb out?

>>721008
Smash orb with skull.

Take a moment to curse all nerds and the useless "reading" they all insist on.

Grab red thing, see if the door to your left is open

Poke red orb with sword in case it's another slime.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)01:20 No. 721077 ID: 265534
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>is that red thing a slime?

No.

It seems to be something different and larger.

RIP OUT ITS FUCKING HEART!

>>721077
If it's slow, whack it in the red thing. If it's not slow, RUN.

You're gonna need a better weapon. Get back down those stairs and try the lower path instead.

>>721079
Agreed

This place is susceptible to earthquakes. Try to use them against the golem.

Other than that, DOOODGE!

DOOOOOOOOOOOODGE

Door to your left appears too short for the golem to easily fit through. Make a tactical retreat, then smack it with the door when it pursues.

Grab the golem's pelvic region.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)08:01 No. 721114 ID: 265534
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Githra manages to dodge the golem's fist and manages to ding the glaring weak spot with her terrible sword.
Who designs these things?

use the stones of the slammed arm as stepping stones to get on top of it. make it hit itself.

Get a good grip in its eyesockets and claim its skull.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)11:03 No. 721128 ID: 265534
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>climb on

Githra makes it on top of the golem before it can even react, but there's not a lot of damage to be done from here.

>rip it's skull out

Normally a good idea, but the golem's skull is a three hundred pound boulder with some little eye marks carved in. It probably doesn't even need it to function.

Use the extra height to jump out of the level and find the WARP ZONE.

can you get it to hit itself?

>>721128
Trick it into attacking itself trying to get at you.

"Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself!"

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)13:05 No. 721147 ID: 265534
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>boost onto the roof

Githra leaps off of the golem up to the roof. Nothing strange up here, but the golem seems to have lost track of her and has stopped moving.

Look for a boulder or something.

Enjoy the sweet mountain view.

Check out what's to the left!

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)14:10 No. 721165 ID: 265534
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>go left

Since it's the way she came in, but on the outside, off to the left is just everywhere she's already been, but on the outside. Much less interesting from here.

>find boulder

No roof boulders just sitting around, just the boulders that make the roof.

>>721165
Hop down, go into the slime room, collect slime in the skull.

Return to the entrance, hop back up on top, walk back to overlooking the golem, then pour slime on it.

If we're really lucky, the slime is acidic enough to hurt the weak spot. If we're less lucky, you've just lubed up something big, strong, and slow. You can get it to slip the next time it gets up.

>>721165
Try a plunging attack on the golem!

Drop back down and lure the golem into busting that door or wall or whatever on the left.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)18:39 No. 721199 ID: 265534
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>try jumping

Need to line this up just right. One wrong move would turn everything into a disaster.

Githra Ushak 2016/05/05(Thu)18:40 No. 721200 ID: 265534
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Victory achieved.

Githra is probably even still alive.

pass out for an hour to heal.

>>721200
Loot the corpse.

Well now how're we gonna get through to the left?

Githra Ushak 2018/02/07(Wed)11:09 No. 865534 ID: 1b55ef
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Githra recovers in probably not even very long and notices the sound of grinding stone.

>>865534
Is it that golem again? Stupid thing. Give it the finger.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/07(Wed)11:15 No. 865538 ID: 1b55ef
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The door is slowly sliding open and making a horrible noise. The other side is dark and foreboding, which is good, because it would be disappointing otherwise.

where's it coming from? Is the golem pulling itself back together or did a door or something open?

>>865538
Get in yonder hole.

>>721201
Two years, an hour, same thing, right?

Pick up golem's fist so you may give even bigger beatdowns.

>>865538
Do you have nightvision? Or a torch? Use whatever will let you see in there.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/07(Wed)13:30 No. 865567 ID: 1b55ef
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The room is small with a probably human skeleton behind a table with a large key on it. Githra hasn't actually seen any locked doors yet, but if she does, she'll be ready.

>>865567
Say hi the the skeleton. It might be one of those people skeletons instead of just a dead skeleton. If he doesn't say hi back steal his thighbone for a club. Also the key I guess.

>>865567
Punch skeleton

That skeleton has nothing holding it together, yet it is sitting up, I suspect undead. Before messing with the key scatter dem bones.

>>865567
Punch skeleton, acquire key.

No don't mess up the skeleton. What if you enrage its ghost?! Just hook a chair leg and drag it away.

examine this extremely fashionable chair, respect the skeleton for it's outstanding taste in furniture in life

Take no chances! Dropkick the skeleton!

Take no chances! Dropkick the skeleton!

That chair looks almost... goopy, somehow. High-five the skeleton's face.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/08(Thu)04:31 No. 865806 ID: 1b55ef
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Githra will not fall for any skeleton deception. She sends it scattering across the floor with a kick of immense power and skill.

The key is obtained as spoils of war.

>>865806
Steal the legbone!

>>865806
better get out before whatever ancient mechanism that decided to open this door decides to close it aswell

>>865806
Head back down the stairs, and then go to the right and hopefully don't get eaten by monsters of the deep.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/09(Fri)03:34 No. 866092 ID: 1b55ef
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Githra returns to the stairwell with the key and a newly plundered thigh bone, which is longer, more durable and possibly sharper than that rusted sword stump.

Down might be the obvious way to go, because dungeons generally get better the deeper they get, but it might be a ruse and the good stuff might be down the flat hallway.

This is trickier than it might seem at first glance.

take the hallway that is flat like boldchest

Overthinking is the real trap. Take the stairs that go downhill, like your luck.

>>866092
Go down on that dungeon

Fall down the stairs.

down is probably the way to go, but you should check out the hallway. It may lead to a dead end filled with loot.

>>866092
Hallways are awesome, don't be un-awesome.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/10(Sat)10:38 No. 866370 ID: 1b55ef
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>>866094
Githra moves down the hallway and finds a campfire with a figure sitting beside it.

"That's wot all ruckus was? A feckin' green skin trompin' about? Have at ye, ya overgrown, festerin' snotwad! Ah'll split ya from forehead to naval, ya snaggle toothed sack of overripe donkey dung!" he exclaims, scrambling to his feet as he heaves up his axe in a threatening manner.

I keep mashing the seduce key but nothing's happening

>>866370
"What the fuck are you doing here, shorty? Come to rub your stumpy dick against the rocks? I'll fuckin bash yer head in if you don't put down that axe, ya overgrown gnome!"

Finally, a mate with meat on his bones.

>>866370
I'm terribly sorry my bashing an obnoxious fucking golem to death disbursed your beauty rest, you hairy inbred midget.

For now, just trade insults with him, see if he's just posturing or if he's actually going to fight you. If he tries to fight you, feel free to kill him.

I'd say kick him in the jewels but he's probably too short for you to reach!

>>866370
Taunt alcoholic beard with key. Dwarves are easily distracted by gold.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/10(Sat)21:14 No. 866506 ID: 1b55ef
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"Sorry to disturb your beauty rest, you hairy inbred midget," Githra replies. "Better drop the axe before I bash your fuckin' head in!"

The dwarf advances, shifting his grip on the axe.
"See, I was just gonna kill ye out of obligation, but now aye'm gonna enjoy it, ya hoggish, lumpy, overgrown head ah belligerent lettuce."

Yeah, like he's ever seen leafy greens in his life!
Break your bone over his head and shove the pointy end in his eyes.

Block his attack with the bone. If possible hit the hilt of the axe instead of the blade. Not only the bone will be less likely to break, after doing that you can slide the bone up and take the axe from his hands.

>>866506
I suspect you won't win this fight. Retreat.

“You’ve probably spent so much time underground you’d mistake your mum for a carrot if she wore a green hat you angry little manlet!”

Oh yeah dodge and attack or whatever.

Seductively rattle your bone.

No one will witness his valor, if theres... no one around to hear.

>>866506
He's got more reach than you, and a real weapon.

Best bet might be a feint, get him to swing and miss. Then quickly brain him before he can get his axe back up.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/19(Mon)07:54 No. 868609 ID: 1b55ef
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The pair clash in mortal combat, the dwarf manages to strike first, but can't land a blow on Githra.
"Ngh! You've never seen your mom in a carrot hat!" she retorts, getting mixed up while trying to make a scathing remark.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/19(Mon)07:57 No. 868610 ID: 1b55ef
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Terrible insults aside, Githra manages to crack the dwarf firmly in the head. He staggers and flails his axe, making it easy for Githra to dodge. She makes a few wild swings at the confused dwarf, then lands a solid hit, dropping him like a sack of bricks.

finish him, then loot his shit.

>>868610
Take his axe and make sure he's dead.

Then look for loot, and relax by his fire.

Remove loincloth.

Insert penis.



In his stout hairy nethers.

Githra Ushak 2018/02/19(Mon)09:22 No. 868625 ID: 1b55ef
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>loot him

Axe.
Food.
Food.
Golden Key.

The dwarf had a key like the one Githra found. Not anymore though.

Enjoy food and fire.

I don't wish death upon this dwarf.

Snuggle him until he feels better.

Take it all, eat a food. One path left to go.

Take a trophy. The dwarf pride, his beard! Braid it than cut so you can carry.

Take his stuff and then wait for him to wake up. Tell him you warned him, now he gets to go home empty handed.

Githra Ushak 2018/04/29(Sun)09:53 No. 881492 ID: df66a2
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Githra steals the dwarf's belonging and the key and heads for the branch of the hall that she hasn't explored yet. There's a giant door with two keyholes that match the keys she just obtained.

>Snuggle him until he feels better.
Githra will go soft on the dwarf and only leave him for dead instead of smashing his skull in until she's absolutely sure he won't get back up.

Break the two keys off in the locks so you can't get locked in.

>>881492
Keys? For a door?

Yeah that's an obvious trap if you ever saw one.

Well might as well get to it.