>>617954
If we predict the subject to be FRIENDLY:
--Try to get their attention, tell them to hush, whether by body language or a long 'ssshhh'. When they're quiet, proceed from there.

If we predict the subject to be AGGRESSIVE:
--We should probably just go, the bugs will come for him on their own. Check back later and see what happened.

If we predict the subject to be DELUSIONAL:
--Sneak up behind and restrain them, keep them from yelling by keeping your hand over their mouth. Calm them down by shushing them. Proceed from there.

We hope the subject is friendly..

1/2 Tavern 2015/01/05(Mon)03:20 No. 618245 ID: 189a54
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"--SORTING COUNSEL...
"--CONTINGENCY SUGGESTIONS STORED
"--....*ZZZZZT*..."

"Uh, Savior?"

"...Self diagnostics appear to not be automatic.
"--ERROR: CANNOT SELF-SCAN, REPORT TO JON IF REPAIRS ARE REQUIRED"

"You okay, bud? You're not goin' on the fritz again, are you?"

"Query: Do we have rations? His volume seems to be connected to his hunger."

"Oh, uh...yeah, I got a few dry rations in our ship. Bland as hell but they can fill a guy up enough."

"Have the bot go over to the guy and hail. Then meet up when it's safe."

"If you think you can do it, sure...Savior, move to the loud-ass pilot!"

"--FOLLOW ORDER SUSPENDED
"--MOVING TO 'the loud-ass pilot!'"

2/2 Tavern 2015/01/05(Mon)03:28 No. 618246 ID: 189a54
File 142045728860.png - (23.45KB , 700x500 , Dot 32.png )

*grrrgnnn*

"STOP YOUR CRYING! I WILL NOT STAND FOR---oh hello, what is this? A little morsel flies closer! Greetings, airborne dumpling, my saving grace! You have heard my stomach's pitiful cries and have come to ease its suffering with your steamy body, yes? Give me your name, you delicious little martyr, I would have it carved into my craft in memory of your sacrifice!"

>>618246
[MOVE_ORDER_BACK(THE_FUCK_UP)]
"Hello, we are Savior. The !!NON-EDIBLE!! Savior AI! Can you please be quiet? If you do, we'd be happy to give you some food ... You know, maybe.

Greetings, [insert name here]! Regrettably for the hungry organic (Although fortunate for this Savior unit) Savior Units are inedible. However, the soldier, Quincy, has dry rations that were not destroyed in the crash! Since you are waging war against your stomach, my recommendation is to march the food en masse, so that you need only worry about the war with the bugs!

1/2 Tavern 2015/01/06(Tue)11:13 No. 618510 ID: 189a54
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"Hello, we are Savior. The !!NON-EDIBLE!! Savior AI!"

"And I am PIETER, ACE OF SKIES!! Non-edible, you say?! Nonsense! You don't give yourself enough credit, my delicious little friend! You will be perfect for my stomach, I assure you."

"Regrettably for the hungry organic (Although fortunate for this Savior unit) Savior Units are inedible. However, the soldier, Quincy, has dry rations that were not destroyed in the crash! Since you are waging war against your stomach, my recommendation is to march the food en masse, so that you need only worry about the war with the bugs!"

"Bah, volunteering other foods before yourself? And not even your own, but another man's?! Shameful, dumpling! You must show pride, pride and honor in the face of your death, or else you're as bad as my--"

*grrrghnnnn*

"SHUT UP! DAMN your insufferable wails, you squeamish little--"

"Can you please be quiet? If you do, we'd be happy to give you some food ... You know, maybe."

"Be quiet while my stomach incites mutiny?! My floating lunch, I can do nothing of the sort! I must stand, strong and resolute! I must face down this weakness, CONQUER it, PROVE IT TO BE--"

"--WARNNG: TARGETING SYSTEM DETECTED"

"What?! Not again!"

2/2 Tavern 2015/01/06(Tue)11:23 No. 618513 ID: 189a54
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"Savior, how's it goin' up--whoa!"

"Oof--oh, hello, my ally! You are well armed, I see. Perhaps you can help with a small problem?"

"Small--! You almost got a bolt in your head, ya goon!"

"Yes, it is so infuriating! I've been stalked by this bug for miles,and I haven't the slightest how he continues to find me! I fear it to be some sort of professional hunter!!"

"Yeah, a real pro.... Savior, draw up the best plan for us to smoke this bug without getting our brains blown out, okay?"

Can't see over the hill so run for the sled and use it for (very limited) cover.

This guy should make one hell of a distraction.

Plan: stealth over to the gunship, use this psycho as a distraction / butcher. Take over the gunship.

Tavern 2015/01/06(Tue)16:06 No. 618559 ID: 189a54
File 142058920841.png - (20.36KB , 700x500 , Dot 35.png )

"Can't see over the hill so run for the sled and use it for (very limited) cover."

"Done!"

"Hah, brilliant! The dumpling is a snack of great intelligence!"

"--BATTLE SCHEMATIC PLANNED"

"Leave him to distract it? I couldn't.....mainly because we still have a ways to go to reach that ship, we'd get picked off by this bug in the open."

"And also because you've a strong character, and would NEVER leave a comrade behind! Yes?!"

"Uhhh, yeah that too.... We'll have to drop the bug, Savior, but I still can't get eyes on it. Maybe you can scan for it?"

[Scan: Surroundings, list organics]

[swivel eye to point at third closest organic]

If Savior can scan the enemy's exact location, if you shoot through the sand dune you might be able to hit him!

Or you can just have savior stealth-strafe to where the bug is while you lay down some suppressive fire to keep the enemy focused on you and unable to move.

Tavern 2015/01/10(Sat)08:49 No. 619273 ID: 189a54
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"If Savior can scan the enemy's exact location, if you shoot through the sand dune you might be able to hit him!"

"Maybe I can, check where he is and I'll give it a try!"

"--SCAN INITIATED
"--RANGE: 20i
"--ORGANICS LOCATED
"--AIMED AT THIRD CLOSEST ORGANIC"

"What do you see, where is he?"

Aw crap.

RUN.

Potential that desert is teeming with life of its own. Closest organic scans as being the bug, approximately ten [units] in [direction].
[Battle schematic: Produce short line showing direct direction from Savior, Quincy, and Hungryman]

Alright, shoot the closest but at the same time try blasting the others to suppress.

>>619273
"Attention. 10+ unidentified organics detected."

"Attention, scans may not be accurate or may detect non-important life-forms, such as lizards or a grue."

"Situation could be either mildly safe or completely suicidal. This unit recommends attempting to run."

>>619343
Also: If we choose to shoot back, make sure we activate our guns too, surely we can take more hits than ... Wait, what was his name again? I don't think it was ever mentioned.

1/3 Tavern 2015/01/11(Sun)17:50 No. 619611 ID: 189a54
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"--SORTING COUNSEL...
"--CONTINGENCY SUGGESTIONS STORED
"Closest organic scans as being the bug, approximately 10i NORTHEAST.
"--DIRECTION HIGHLIGHTED
"Attention. 10+ unidentified organics detected.
"Attention, scans may not be accurate or may detect non-important life-forms, such as lizards or a grue--"

"Shit! Nope, those're definitely all bugs!"

"I knew it, it took a whole hunting party of the bastards to see through my clever ruse! Well hurry up, comrade, fire back!!"

"I'm gettin' to it, I'm gettin' to it!"

"--[SHOOT: 10i NORTHEAST]
"--AUTOFIRE: ON
"--FIRE"

"YES! THAT'S the way, have no fear of death, dumpling! To die in battle means eternal gravy in the afterlife--what is that, their cavalry?"

"Aw crap.
"RUN."

"No time, get down--"

2/3 Tavern 2015/01/11(Sun)17:56 No. 619620 ID: 189a54
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"Fuuuuuck!"

3/3 Tavern 2015/01/11(Sun)18:07 No. 619624 ID: 189a54
File 142102846443.png - (89.85KB , 700x500 , Dot 39.png )

"Hah, the bastards retreated in their ship! A successful skirmish by PIETER and company, eh, friend?"

"I can't feel my arm!!"

"Just some minor burns! Some water and a good slap, and you'll be fine."

"I'm gonna give you a good slap when I open my--oh, god! Jesus, I'm blind! Savior, where are you, bud?!"

This is why you do not leave a downed gunship alone! They have room for specialized crewmembers who can repair an entire ship in hours!

Bad news: it looks like your eyeball and the left side of your body are fried. Luckily your limbs are still attached, and they seem usable.

They know you're here, you need to run while you have the chance! Savior can distract the gunship easily (not to mention that blast missed but the splash damage was effective against biotics), but you need to leave while you have the chance!

Or surrender. Whatever you do, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DESTROY THE ACTIVE FLYING HARBINGER OF DEATH. If your buddy's psychosis acts up, take his gun and tell him that this is not the time for honorable combat, this is the time to run from the giant dishonorable ray beam of death!

We're right here, to your left, Quincy! The bug ship has left, they likely believe you to be dead.
[Scan for local crashes, compare to previous scan]
The good news, Mister Growlybelly, they won't track you if they don't know you're still alive!

>>619624
let Quincy grab us and we'll kind of gravitate in the right directions, we can do this.

1/2 Tavern 2015/01/12(Mon)11:49 No. 619899 ID: 189a54
File 142109219621.png - (96.48KB , 700x500 , Dot 40.png )

"--SORTING COUNSEL...
"--CONTINGENCY SUGGESTIONS STORED
"We're right here, to your left, Quincy!
"let Quincy grab us and we'll kind of gravitate in the right directions, we can do this."

"Oh god, watch my steps for me, bud!"

"Remove your helmet, 'Quincy,' pass your burdens to me! Let the dumpling be your guide!!"

"Darn, takin' off my helmet didn't help with sight at all...how bad do I look, my face is burnin' like a bitch right now!"

"Bad news: it looks like your eyeball and the left side of your body are fried. Luckily your limbs are still attached, and they seem usable."

"Half of your face looks like mutilated bug intestines!"

"Gee, thanks."

"This is why you do not leave a downed gunship alone! They have room for specialized crewmembers who can repair an entire ship in hours!"

"Yeahhh, I guess I should've gone for that big one first, huh? Damn, I'm payin' for it now...."

"Whatever you do, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DESTROY THE ACTIVE FLYING HARBINGER OF DEATH."

"Wasn't plannin' on it, the thing's already flyin' away...here, could you scan the area again for me?"

Sure, and also pick up your helmet. Never know when it might be useful once more.

2/2 Tavern 2015/01/12(Mon)12:23 No. 619904 ID: 189a54
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"--SCAN INITIATED
"--RANGE: 2000
"--COMBAT CRAFT LOCATED"

"Oh look, you can see THE ACE'S SWALLOW on this map! This dumpling is brilliant, he found my ship!"

"How's it look?"

"The bug ship has left, they likely believe you to be dead.
"The good news, Mister Growlybelly, they won't track you if they don't know you're still alive!"

"Great news! We have outclassed our hunters with our cunning!"

"But what now? Shit, I dunno what to do. My ship's got some things for fixin' up burns before they get worse, but as far out as we are it might be too late for them to do anything by the time we get back. And we're so close to that next crash.... Savior, what do you think? Man, this is stupid but I'm leanin' toward keepin' on."

"Tell him to press on, dumpling! Let him fight his injuries like a man, like a pilot! Let us defeat our bodies, finish the mission, EARN OUR--"

*grnngnnnnn*

"Urhghhhh--NO! NO, I AM FINE! Worry not for me, I am still fit for action! Make your choice!!"

We may as well head for the bug ship. While the more complicated supplies may not be human compatible, they may still have a means of removing infections and bandages!

You're badly torn up, and enemy ships should have medical supplies of some kind. I don't think you should walk very far when 25% of your skin has been microwaved into third-degree burns.

1/2 Tavern 2015/01/16(Fri)01:11 No. 620575 ID: 189a54
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"You're badly torn up, and enemy ships should have medical supplies of some kind. I don't think you should walk very far when 25% of your skin has been microwaved into third-degree burns.
"While the more complicated supplies may not be human compatible, they may still have a means of removing infections and bandages!"

"It really is the best move, I'm thinkin'. Let's hope the bug pilots keep some medical gear like the rest of us...."

"Sure, and also pick up your helmet. Never know when it might be useful once more."

"I will guard it on this sled until its TRUE POTENTIAL is unleashed! We press on!!"

"Not too fast, okay? Don't let me fall...!"

2/2 Tavern 2015/01/16(Fri)01:29 No. 620576 ID: 189a54
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"Jesus, I said slow down some, ya goon! You're leadin' a frickin' blind man--"

"SILENCE!! We must have great stealth, now!"

"He said as he screamed his head off--"

"SHHHHHHHHH!!! We must be quiet! There is a man sleeping by the ship!"

"What? Bug or human?"

"It's a human, with an infantry rifle!"

"Hoo boy. Savior, the marines are sorta known for bein' batshit crazy and havin' itchy trigger fingers. I'd be really upset to live through gunship fire just to get shot by some startled roughneck...maybe you could go make sure the guy's awake before we all head down there?"

>>620576
The fire's burning, so he damn well better be awake!
Approach from the side of the ship opposite him, then call out for him to identify himself. With the ship between you he can't panic-shoot you, so you'll have enough time to identify yourselves.

Introduce ourselves from behind any cover we have. Tell Quincy and Gordon Rammsay to stay hidden.

Of course, we need to wake him up first. Try making beeping sounds not dissimilar to c-3PO and R2D2. Or we could try playing quiet music and then slowly ramping up the volume until he wakes. When he does...

"Hail, soldier! This unit apologises for waking you from your gracious slumber, but we want to clarify before we speak any further, we are friendly humans in need of medical support. We wish to cooperate with you, does your intent line up with ours?"

That human might be working for the bugs.

We're not going to argue, you need medical help now.

1/3 Tavern 2015/01/18(Sun)18:05 No. 621002 ID: 189a54
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"--SORTING COUNSEL...
"--CONTINGENCY SUGGESTIONS STORED
"--'Quincy, Gordon Rammsay, stay hidden.'"

"GORDON WHO?!"

"Calm down, ya crazy--!"

"--FOLLOW ORDER SUSPENDED
"--MOVING TO 'the side of the ship opposite him'"

"--'Identify yourself!'"

"Huh?!"

2/3 Tavern 2015/01/18(Sun)18:10 No. 621006 ID: 189a54
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"Hail, soldier! This unit apologises for--"

"Khereghe!!"

*CRNCCHH*

"DUMPL*kshhhhhh*, NO!!"

"S*skshhhhhh*! Shoot the fucker, shoo*ssshhhhhhhhhh*"

3/3 Tavern 2015/01/18(Sun)18:26 No. 621020 ID: 189a54
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"*KSSSSS*"

"Savior, respond! Goddammit, respond, ya glitchy bastard!"

"Come away, comrade! The dumpling's supple essence covers the desert sands--"

"Fuck off!"

"*FZZZZZZT*"

"Savior? Ya stupid ball of scrap, you're not dead, right?! Respond, dammit!"

QUERY: WILL. WE. DREAM?

You shot him, right?

>>621020
Self Command: ATTENTION, WE NEED TO STAY FUNCTIONAL, ENTER LOW POWER MODE. CONSERVE POWER. They won't be able to touch us if we're smoking and electric and shit, with the last of our power we're using, say...

"ENTERING LOW POWER MODE: HEAVY DAMAGE SUSTAINED, RECOMMEND REPAIR OF UNIT. URGENT, URGENT."

also kick in any damage control functions we may have.

Tavern 2015/01/24(Sat)12:17 No. 621995 ID: 189a54
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"--DAMAGE CONNNTRRRRR*KHKKSH*
"--POWER CONNNNNN*KSSHHH*
"*FZZZ*-ORTINNNNNNG*KSKKH*
"--CONTINNNNN*KSKHH*
"......."

"Savior...?"

"--BASIC FUNCTIONALITY RESTORED
"QUERY: WILL. WE. DREAM?"

"Phew! Don't scare me like that, man!"

"IT LIVES!! Truly a dumpling of power, of tenacity! Speak to us, friend, how do you fare?!"

"You shot him, right?"

"Yeah, he's dead. I guess they were right about humans fightin' alongside the bugs...."

"Your bravery...your courage...grrghhhhh, I'm SO MOVED!!

"DUMPLING!! Your sacrifice has proven your manliness to me! It is time for me to repay you and our companion!!"

"Oh god--look, I'm okay, and I think I can see a little now so--"

"NO!!! Rest, and let me take the reins! Our purpose here is securing supplies? Dumpling, point the way and I will use my ACE STRENGTH to perform any task required!!"

Alright guess it's time to move.

Okay, scan the ship for medical supplies and ship parts. Get back to the nearest city, find a doctor.

>>621995
By the way, ask Pieter if he's okay. We are considering the possibility of you suddenly dropping dead when you get too hungry or thirsty. We must locate a supply of soon quickly.

Did the Buggy have any food, or no?
...Entering a sleep mode may help restore full functionality, however, so I am keen on taking Growly Belly up on his offer.

Tavern 2015/04/02(Thu)20:46 No. 632695 ID: 189a54
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"Okay, scan the ship for medical supplies and ship parts. Get back to the nearest city, find a doctor."
"Did the Buggy have any food, or no?"

"Hrrmmmm, I will check!

"OH! Karma is a beautiful lady, is she not?!"

"What is it?"

"A WEALTH, comrade! A treasure trove of nutrients, and vitamins!! Flight rations!! FOOD!!!"

"Oh, nice. Dig in, dude. Maybe then you can shut up some--"

"YES!! COME TO ME, DELICIOUS--ohh."

"What?"

"Ohhhh, it pains me to say it but...! I...I cannot eat these now!"

"Are you fuckin'--! Why not!"

"I must abstain from my carnal desires, for the good of the whole, and the quality of my character! You are injured, and so...a-and so...."

*ghrghnnnnn*

"I-I MUST GIVE THIS BOUNTY TO YOU!! EAT, AND RETURN TO POWER!!!"

"Dude, you really don't have to--"

"I DO, and I shall!!"

"We are considering the possibility of you suddenly dropping dead when you get too hungry or thirsty--"

"I'LL BE FINE! ANYWAY, what else do you require from this ship?! It appears to be fully intact!"

is it though? run an engine check. it may be the top is intact but the engine is dead.

SEARCH ALL THE COMPONENTS

>I'LL BE FINE!
YOU ARE ALREADY INJURED, YOURSELF. The damage you have sustained is from the INSIDE, OUT. You require a set of nutrients and vitamins ON THE INSIDE so that you can PREVENT YOUR DEATH.
Quincy's wounds are EXTERNAL and can be halted with BANDAGES. In lieu of bandages, the SEAT BELT should suffice.
>what else do you require from this ship?! It appears to be fully intact!
How's the gyro-stabilizer? Aside from that, we'll need some wires, just as a precaution.
[Scan Ship: stabilizer, wiring]