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Yellow Rain Puff
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This is a lot to take in. I’m not even sure where to start. I can’t even think about the other stuff first. The way she talks about the town snags in my head.
>Is... is it really an awful town? She could try and run away to find a town she likes too, a home.
“I mean.” I stumble on my words. “Is the town that awful for trying to protect you?”
>how awful can the town be if they care about her enough to protect her?
“They risked themselves to protect you, that’s not. I can’t.”
>>Tell her off for rejecting the townspeople when they clearly like her and want to protect her, and have done literally everything they could for her to make her be one of them.
“They obviously want to accept you! That striped mantle means they accept you as one of them. What more could you want?”
She’s just clinging to the side of the house. I can only see her face and forelimbs. “I thought you would have understood. I am an outsider-under-license, a stranger they have all agreed to not be afraid of. They protect me because they protect their independence. They do not care about me. There is no place for me among them. I have no ghost to give them, so I am an intrusion. You are a dog. Even if you are uneasy here, it is your remnant. You don’t understand. You don’t understand what it is to be an alien.”
>Do we have any evidence that this sort of behaviour is abnormal among dreambugs?
>The trying to make friends with you in your sleep thing you could deal with. You guess. She is a dreambug after all.
“Speaking of alien, is what you did to me okay by dreambug standards? Is that just something else I don’t understand?”
>Maexiks what the HELL?! She was invading your dreams regularly as a child […] She's been manipulating you just because she feels uncomfortable in the tombdog remnant
“Because, what I’m understanding from this, you were manipulating me? You were actually seriously trying to control me?” My voice is starting to break. It’s getting hard to keep speaking clearly.
> Also now it's impossible to tell if these feelings you have for her are legitimate
> control you into liking her. I wouldn't be surprised if she's done worse.
“So what about all these… feelings I’ve been having for you? Wanting to like. Aaaaah. That kissing? Touching? Am I only doing that because you trained me to? Dig me a grave I licked you the first night I ran away it just felt natural was that only because you trained me to do it in my dreams? What sort of things have we done in dreams that I don’t remember?”
Maexiks’ voice is a little whistle. “I didn’t.”
“What have we done that I don’t remember?”
“I didn’t.”
>How come you've been remembering all these dreams now, anyway? It's weird that you didn't remember even a single one of her before then. Was she making you forget
“How come I don’t even remember the other dreams? Was that something you were doing on purpose? Maexiks?”
“Yes.”
>Then all those conversations you two had, between what should have been friends, were taken from you because of her selfishness and cowardice.
“So you were okay with just having a one-sided friendship? You wouldn’t even let me remember that we were friends? I meant so much to you but all I knew you as was a merchant I talked to sometimes! Why? Why?”
“Because it was too late. I knew if I told you, at any time I told you, it would have been too late. I had been doing it all your life. It was always too late to tell you the truth.”
>So basically she was lonely and friendless and a little kid when it started and so were you.
>Aww she was a lonely kid and wanted a friend.
“My… entire life.”
>So it's not like some kind of evil scheme, or even her being evil, you were just way better friends than you knew
“I wish you had told me. After a certain point, we were both too grown up to not. I.”
>Maexiks's attempts to help you with your problems had exactly the same thing wrong with them as your original problems; someone trying sincerely to help you with what you surely want without ever thinking to actually ask or discuss it with you.
“Was it even my choice to run away?”
> Control you into running away.
>But her deliberately influencing one of the most important decisions of your life?
“Did I even decide anything in my life?”
She’s hiding herself entirely on the side of the house now. I can’t really see her. “I don’t know.”
>Despite apparently being utterly butterly batshit bug-girl raises a point; no matter where you go you will never fit in.
>She didn't implant the idea to run away in your head, all she did was help convince you that you were capable of doing something that you wanted to do all along anyway.
>She did get a little stalkery there but mostly just encouraging you the only way she knew how.
>When you think about it, the worst that she's done is been clingy, encouraged you to be independent and follow your heart
>The more we hear about Geofahn the more it sounds like not being with them is a good thing.
>You just made the choice easier.
>She pushed Sabby, sure, and Sabby didn't remember it when she was awake, sure, but she didn't literally control her thoughts at all.
“… no. This was still my choice. I can’t believe you’ve completely made me who I am. And who I am, it isn’t someone who was okay with how my life was going. You encouraged me to do what I wanted to do, when it was already what I wanted. Maybe I wouldn’t have had the courage to do it without you. I wish you had told me all those nights, though. Had let me remember them.”
> Romance is right out, though, and friendship is a stretch right now- she has a lot to make up for.
>It is POSSIBLE to forgive Maexiks, but she must realize that what she did was ABSOLUTELY WRONG
>Yeah it's pretty obvious she doesn't feel great about having done it.
>she obviously cares for you a lot, and didn't mean for any harm to come to you.
>Ok... this gives me more of a feeling of disappointment than anger.
I sit down on top of the house. “But I mean. I’m just. More disappointed. And upset. I’m angry, but. I think you did a lot of things wrong, but I don’t think it was for any wrong reasons. Just. I’m not going to be okay with this right away. But I mean. I guess of all the people manipulating me—my family, Geofahn, the whole remnant—at least you were actually doing it for my own good. So. Get back up here.”
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