Time for something dumb Your name is Wingsnake. You are going to have an ADVENTURE! It has neem several years since the last of your kind was born, and as the prophecy foretold you would have to go on a mission! A mission to SAVE THE WORLD! Now if only you knew where to start...
>>491888 >Crunch!
Good job, you have succeeded in your quest for lunch. Now to find someone who will help you in your quest for evil. Err did I say evil? I meant fighting evil. ahaha ... ha
I don't even fucking know. Look for minor shoplifters, demand they pay fines proportionate to what they stole, and if they refuse, DEVOUR THEM.
EVIL HAS BEEN VANQUISHED PEACE SHALL SURELY RETURN TO THESE LANDS NOW GO HOME AND REST FOR 1000 YEARS
Hmm. Well, I suppose if he was a criminal, he's no longer in a position to do any crime. ...is he still alive enough to interrogate? Heros are usually supposed to stop just sort of killing villains. Unless there are cliffs or other moral grey areas involved to deflect the guilt.
>>491893 did his eyebrows evolve? why does a snake have eyebrows?
>>492015 >>491901 >>491900 >>491896 >>491894 MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! EVIL HAS BEEN DEFEATED! And my eyebrows are the EYEBROWS OF JUSTICE! They give me SUPER POWERS!
well clean the blood off your mouth and lets go look for more evil to eat. I mean vanquish.
>>492016 FOOL. Instead, we must GROW. GROW HUGE. Eat all the things, and grow LARGER. LARGENESS will grant us STRENGTH with which to DOMINATE ALL LIFE Conquer evil.
>They give me SUPER POWERS! Which ones?
this isn't over yet, the next bit is just taking a little bit! expect it later this week, yo.
the next update is coming thursday or friday guys!
meanwhile, miles above the surface of whatever planet this happens to be... oh. Now that IS interesting, a class forty-nine interceptor. Those are supposed to be impenetrable, what could POSSIBLY have caused that?
Wingsnake, notice the growing shadow around you, and look up at the last second.
>spot check failed. The ship decimates your pitiful snake physique. Oh dear, it looks like our previous protagonist died on us.
EYEBROWS OF POWER- attach yourself to your NEW HOST.
Well, shoot! What should we do now, then? >reroll character?
>>492959 ARGONIAN SPACE ASSASSIN.
ARCHIVEMOD = CHARACTER
rolled 317 = 317 >>492983 NO WAIT, ABOLETH SPACE ACE. C'mon guys, don't you want to be a gelatinous aquatic space ace?
>>492999 I'd go for all suggestions to morph together into one super character.
rolled 509 = 509 >>493005 A gelatinous Argonian Archivemod with psychic powers from another dimension who is also a Space Ace? Just typing thta mke hedmeets fel nu gud.
>Well, shoot! What should we do now, then? I told you. The eyebrows of justice need to attach themselves to a new host.
Another WingSnake!
>>493070 No, please, not again!
A f-cking giant spider
Something eye-brow compatible, to be sure. Perhaps an octopus?
>>493138 Octosnake or octopus with eyebrow tentacles
>>493193 So an Aboleth with eyebrows?
>ERROR: input commands not valid >REASON: Entities described nowhere near focal point >SUGGESTED ALTERNATIVES: Ship Pilot, a small bird, the EYEBROW units
small bird
Eyebrows: attach yourself to small bird. Or the pilot, or the plane, whatever.
>>493302 I'm fine as long as its' a Space Ace.
bird
A flying eyebrow, in memory of Wingsnake (2/10/2013 - 2/14/2013)
>Searching... >Searching... >NEW PROTAGONIST LOCATED! >Designation: Anonymous Avian >Status: Calm, stupid. >ENTER QUERY/COMMAND
EQUIP EYEBROWS, STUPID.
>Attempting to locate EYEBROW units... >Attempt successful. Current location: three miles due south. >Error: Anonymous Avian does not understand the concept of EYEBROWS, and does nothing. >Reformat command?
Head towards tasty worms to the south.
>>494896 "FOODFOODFOODFOODFOODFOOD" >Command line successful. >Enter query/command:
>Anonymous Avian has taken flight. >Autopilot engaged. >Flight duration Estimate: 30 minutes. >Enter Query:
>>494901 Destruct sequence 1, code 1-1 A. Code zero zero zero. Destruct. Zero.
>>494905 What? No. Ignore the saboteur, and continue flying south in search of delicious (eyebrow) pudding, Okasan.
LAY EGG IS TRUE!
>>494905 >>494910 >>494978 >Autopilot is currently ACTIVE. Commands are not responsive until the Autopilot is disengaged. >Alternative found: Enter Query. [spoier] This means ask questions, dorks. Commands are gonna be inactive for a few panels, consider these 'exposition breaks.' Choo chooo.[/spoiler]
>>494996 Where can we find a protagonist with more brain power than a three-watt bulb?
What is your prime directive?
>Wher to locate a smarter host: Seek out pilot of crashed space ship. >alternative: find EYEBROW units. >>495044 >Prime directive: Location and transmission of commands to chosen subject, commonly referred to as "mental suggestion" due to the frequency of commands not taking hold as desired. >Estimated flight time remaining: 20 minutes. >Enter Query
>Enter Query ...could we just time skip to the dumb bird reaching the crash site already?
>>495109 >Skipping cutscene... Gonna cut it here this week, folks. next update is next thursday, same as usual.