Atticus G. 2012/02/12(Sun)15:55 No. 386079 ID: b70814
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You walk up the hallway and see a shelf and table filled with decorative Sexy Glass Giraffes, there is also a door. What is your first plan of action.

smash the sexy glass figurines and store them for use as caltrops later on, just make sure you don't cut yourself.

>>386079
Determine that you are drunk and not actually on a mission. You are in fact AWOL and attempting to blow up your ex's apartment after that bitch dumped you and revealed she was having an affair in public. At your birthday/promotion party. On interplanetary tv.

Anyway, I think we should target the boiler/AC unit. Blow that thing to hell, and the area becomes uninhabitable.

Confiscate Highly Illegal Sexy Glass Giraffes.
You will of course see to it that they are added to your collection disposed of later.

Listen at the door. Open it quietly if it's all clear.

>>386088
This.

In the absence of an AC unit or boiler, go into the kitchen.

Atticus G.(art'n) / Stupid Footloose Rabbit (word'ns) 2012/02/12(Sun)17:50 No. 386112 ID: b70814
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>>386088
Using you're impressive cognitive ability to determine that you're drunk. This is well in line with your personal coda: Cigarettes for Breakfast and Whiskey for Din-din.

You're not in a relationship, however. You're Major Danger Summ'bitch Havoc. Relationships are for those unfortunate many not cool enough for the cigarette and whiskey diet.

>>386082
You stare at the sexy glass giraffe figurines. They are rather sexy, adding deep conflicting emotions to your inventory. After a quick HyperGoogle(tm) search for caltrops, you decide to smash all of them except Fuzzy Princess.

No one fucks with Fuzzy Princess.

Not-So Sexy Caltrops have been added to your inventory.

Force the door to open the wrong way, that way if there's someone on the opposite side you can just say it was an honest mistake.

Atticus G. 2012/02/13(Mon)18:39 No. 386386 ID: 64896c
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>>386114
You decide to show this door what your all about, you vast mind has formulated a plan, open the door the wrong way, in order to have this random enemy base fall into a false sense of security thinking your an ass for brains.

You rip the door off its hinges and the wall for that matter.

NEXT.

You then execute stage two. All of your cunning as a interplanetary star ship pilot has pointed to one solution.

Walk through the massive gaping hole that is the best plan ever.

A old style trash can robot sits at the other end of the hall way, guarding a hole, probably filled with riches or at least more figurines. There are also some odd holes on the wall to.

The robot calls you a "Ninny" and then asks "How you gonna act?"

Atticus G. 2012/02/13(Mon)18:45 No. 386390 ID: 64896c
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>>386388

Punch it in the face.

>>386390
Engage in trash talk with the garbage bin. call it a "pile of rubbish" and that its even worse than a toilet considering that people at least touch toilets even if they are considered dirty, while people avoid touching trash cans all together.

Atticus G. (art-time) / Stupid Footloose Rabbit (word-maker) 2012/02/22(Wed)18:50 No. 388403 ID: e0815a
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>>386519
You engage in Trash Talk with a robot that bears a striking resemblance to a trash can. With a belly full of rye and a mind full of rage, you make that vitriolic proclamation, "You're a pile of rubbish!"

sage Atticus G. (art-maker) / Stupid Footloose Rabbit (word-time) 2012/02/22(Wed)19:00 No. 388406 ID: e0815a
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The robot emits a scathing retort with a furrowed brow, "Your mother is a raster animated whore!!!

You feel your resolve shaken, but not diminished.

"at least she only slept with living things, your mom fucked anything that was phallic shaped, explains why you turned out so ugly."

Atticus G. (art-maker) / Stupid Footloose Rabbit (word-time) 2012/02/22(Wed)19:16 No. 388412 ID: e0815a
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The biting comment has damaged your over-inflated ego slightly. You can't even stand the look of him at the moment and you're forced to turn your back.

>>386453
You decide that now is time to introduce to this trash can robot to someone. Two someones.

[b]"I would like you to meet my two buds; Monday and Friday. You better clear your schedule, rubbish bot, cuz you got a full week ahead of ya!"

You let out a mighty yell and begin charging at the machine in a blistering belligerent rage!

Atticus G. (art-m'n) / Stupid Footloose Rabbit (word-kid) 2012/02/22(Wed)19:30 No. 388415 ID: e0815a
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And then... this shit happens.

Intense, pulsating energy asterisks, flying out of the circular holes along the wall. Your Jaguar-like reflexes keep the asterisk from taking your head.

It would scare the Bejesus out of you, if you had such bejesus to be expelled. Instead, you just grow more volatile.

>>388408
"At least she only slept with living things, your mom fucked anything that was phallic shaped, explains why you turned out so ugly!" you spit back.

The robot seems unphased. Perhaps, even smug. The bastard's got death asterisks and all you you could do is lob organic insults at a decisively synthetic machine.

This next move better be a good'n, bub.

crawl along the ground.

>>388415
Throw an explosive?