Daniels 2010/11/07(Sun)19:00 No. 253852 ID: 4f6e37
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>>253847
Sofiya sees Aldo leap away from the stunned thug. Where does she shoot him? Where does she shoot him?!

>>253852
In the other arm! Pin him to the car!

groin. shoot him in the dick.

>>253844
Sophia: "I can't talk about an ongoing investigation, but I think you know they didn't want to do anything Mrs. Fierberg would enjoy. Get everybody in the back of the store, and send the bill for the window to the Sheriff's office.

Aldo: Knee him in the groin, then put your full strength into getting his free hand down against the vehicle.

>>253855
Pin his other arm, or graze his balls so he understands how proper fucked he is.

In the gut or groin. It should take the fight right out of him, but he'll survive long enough for us to interrogate him.

fuck the charade. Sofiya just admit you're vagrants doing essentially vigilante work while Officer Oren and Deputy Nessie are outta town for some good old time fun kicking badguy ass. What's the Barista gonna do, stop two badass motherfuckers from saving two citizens? Tell Oren on us while he's unable to respond?

If anything, admitting you're not the law and two paladinish psychos will probably be defined as Elena not seeking the police for help and its just two stupid glory hounds. They'd even be more afraid of you because there'd be no lawful bullshit holding you back.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/10(Wed)14:45 No. 254915 ID: 4f6e37
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With a twang, Sofiya fires a bolt right into the thug's Thug Jr., raising an agonized howl. Aldo and the barista wince in unison.
She kicks the door open and snaps another arrow into place, marching briskly outside.
"You aren't cops at all, are you?" says the barista.
"Brilliant obthervation," says Sofiya.
"You're nutcases with crossbows," he says.
"We're altho the only hope thith woman'th huthband hath. Who elth is gonna help her?" says Sofiya, turning back in the doorway. "Her barithta?"
"I could call the Authority," says the barista.
Sofiya smirks. "Thith crothbow and me are the only authority thith town'th got for today, sugar."
She looks out at Aldo, who's waiting for her next to the groaning criminal.
And Aldo sees Sofiya walk out, reloading the crossbow. That broad has got a lot of fucking explaining to do. They now have one prisoner and one body. Elena's just standing near the coffee shop, looking stricken.

>>254915
Go talk to Elena first, I guess?

Aldo: ask what was up with sofiya shooting the first dude! then start interrogating the prisoner. slowly make that protrusion through his hand widen if he isn't being forward with the answers.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/10(Wed)20:28 No. 255082 ID: 4f6e37
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"What the fuck was that?" says Aldo, as Sofiya walks up to them. "When did I tell you to shoot WM in the head?"
"You thignaled," says Sofiya, raising her voice over the keening moan of the prisoner. "I thought they were threatening you."
"I-" says Elena.
"Signaled, hell," says Aldo. "Since when does holding a hand up translate into 'shoot WM in the head'? I was in the middle of extorting that cockhole!"
"aaaaaaugh" says Shitstreak.
"Exthtorting?" says Sofiya. "Aldo, were you taking bribes from them?"
"I didn't have any intention of letting them go, I just wanted their money," says Aldo.
"Hey-" says Elena.
"We're thuppothed to be acting like the good guyth for onth, Aldo. Will you try and get your athpergerth or whatever under control for one fucking day?"
"Playing Cops and Robbers or whatever we're doing here was YOUR idea," says Aldo. "I was all for just leaving but NO."
"aaaaaaughrhg," says Shitstreak.
"Shut UP," says Aldo. "Now if we aren't rearrested we're going to get hunted down by Andri and force-fed our own fucking HEARTS."
"Hey-" says Elena.
"What do you care?" says Sofiya. "You want to be your usual cowardly thelf and jutht run away. That'th alwayth worked for you before."
"And why not? You just KILLED A GANG ENFORCER IN BROAD DAYLIGHT. As if anyone will think we're cops now-"
"I don't care," says Elena. "I really do not care. You may not be the ideal law enforcers, and your methods are really really not kosher, but you are all Henry and I have got, okay? So would you please just torture this guy or whatever so you can find out where Andri is so you can help me?"

>>254988
>>255082

((Quick clarification: Interrogate how? What questions do we need to ask him? Do we want to ask him? How much do we want him to know?))

You heard the lady.

Bind the guy and transport him away from here so you can interrogate him.

>>255082
Pfft, naw, we can get more information out of him without torture.
Drop your voice low.
"Here's the game plan. Henry has gambling debts, and rather than setting up a payment plan to recoup the losses over time your fuckwit boss decided to try to bleed a stone.
Now, you're going to tell us everything we want to know, then we're going to beat the shit out of you and leave you in the street. Because if you don't share we're going to bandage your wounds and let you go."

I think he's suffered enough honestly, he'll probably give anything right now if he could just get some painkillers and a doctor. Just tie him in Elena's car (after fixing it of course). Say you'll only take him to a doctor if you spill the beans if not, he'll take a hike... in the desert a few miles from here where his balls will bleed out in his pants. If he replies he'd rather die than reveal anything just comfort him with the fact that his entire organization would likely be dead in the next few hours if he would just gladly supply the information, taking out all threats that could endanger him.

In one way, he might end up dying horribly of exposure and bleeding out his ballsack, in the other he gets off scott-free with a free vivisection. He'll be able to hit all the pussy if he wants to risk opening old wounds... then we put a arrow between his eyes so he can't threaten the now safe and sound, reunited family.

>>255099
This sounds like an interesting idea. Keep the fellow on his toes, at the very least.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/11(Thu)20:44 No. 255456 ID: 4f6e37
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Fine, whatever," mutters Aldo. "You going to help, Sofiya, or are you just going to stand there and beam self-righteousness at me?"
Sofiya just glares at him.

"Now hear this," says Aldo, dropping down to eye level with the agonized Shitstreak. "Here's the game plan. You're going to tell us everything we want to know or else we're going to let you bleed to death through your balls, no?"
Shitstreak spits blood out of his mouth from his nose. "I know nothing. I am just thug."

"You got a lousy poker face, friend. No judgement, maybe that's a result of the arrow in your crotch. Now spill the beans," says Aldo, "and we'll rough you up and leave you in the street, and maybe you can make it to a hospital in time to save a couple nickels from your coinpurse. Or, if you don't," he leans in. "We'll patch you up spick and span and send you right on back to Andri, gift-wrapped. I wonder what he'll do when he finds out you failed."
Shitstreak pales, but recovers. "He is my cousin, Pavel Andri. He is family."
"Ah," says Aldo. "But I know him. Better than you do, I'll reckon, if you think that's going to stop him."

Shitstreak grimaces in anger, pain, and (perhaps) a bit of fear. "I talk," he says. "I talk I talk. What are you wanting to know, exactly?"

Whether Henry is alive, where he is, and how to bust him out before anyone realizes you're crazy enough to stage a rescue.

I can't think of any way to ask the required information without making it obvious that we're going to try rescuing him. This is a problem since he's going to contact his boss as soon as he's out of earshot, but I can't think of any solution.

You want to know where the kidnapping victims go, and consequently, where his boss is. You want to know what his process is for killing them, and you want to know how many guards and the security of the building.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/12(Fri)21:25 No. 255802 ID: 4f6e37
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"Is Henry alive?" Aldo asks.
"Yes," says Shitstreak.
"Okay. Where?" says Aldo.
"Being held in building next to. What is the word? Place where skiffs are parked."
"Skiff Station? He's in the skiff station?"
"Next to it, ja. Big brick building. Two floors, used to be warehouse, maybe. Seven, eight men inside and your Henry. Is all I know, I swear."
"And is he going to be killed? What was the plan?"
"Woman shows up, we take the money, kill him and his wife," says Shitstreak. "It is rough business. Examples must be made."
"Classy. Where's Andri?"
"Maybe there, maybe not. We have hotel rooms in Fourth Way Motel. Maybe there."
"So how would one bust Henry out?"
"What, you ask me?" says Shitstreak, grimacing. "Why would I know or tell you? Is not simple. Kill everyone and untie him. You are big hero people."
"Tho? What do we do?" says Sofiya.
"I don't know. You think of something," says Aldo. "It was your idea to play the damn hero in the first place. So now we have a body to get rid of, a hysterical broad to calm down, and a big giant gangster from hell out for both of our hides. He has like eight guys and what, we've got a crossbow, a glorified blacksmith, a couple badges and a car."
"There'th a way out of thith," says Sofiya, stubbornly.
"I'd love to know about it," says Aldo. "The floor is yours, madam."

Not everything needs to be "run in and kill all the bad guys", what you need to do is get a disguise. What's the induction ceremonies, would they have them while a kidnapping is taking place? And if not, how are guards identified? Passwords, suits, what about janitors and other servicemen? How would you get in without the fanfare?

>>255802
This plan doesn't involve running away and hiding in a hole for a week does it? Or does this one involved gratuitous application of high explosives, must say I prefer the latter to the former.

>>255802
Yeah you are not going to be able to take on eight guys with what you've got. Short of finding some ragtag bunch of misfits to help you out, you're gonna need to scope out the place or something, if you can do that.

>>255802
You know banks don't murder their clients if their loan isn't paid in time. Usually there's a simple penalty a few times before they hand it off to a collection agency. I take it your boss isn't business smart, it's only rough because you dumb fucks decided it was going to be rough. Word gets out about that bullshit and damn people are not gonna go to you at all. How in the fuck do these gangster bankers maintain business if there so goddamn scary? I really want to know their secret.

Damn bankers need some fucking leniency. That's the whole fucking point of a loan, spirits.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/13(Sat)18:33 No. 256107 ID: 4f6e37
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>>255827
Andri isn't a banker, he's a druglord. That's a bit of a difference. Aldo's not sue how Henry got into debt with him, or if he even did and that isn't something Andri just made up to sucker Elena into delivering him cash.
"Is there a password or something you people use to identify each other?" Aldo asks.
"Technically, password is 'Sjenka'," says Shitstreak. "But is formality. There are few besides the people in warehouse Andri has brought with him. We all know each other."
"A thtakeout couldn't hurt, though," says Sofiya. "Not if we're careful."

They unstick Shitstreak from the car and let him limp off to a hospital somewhere, then Elena drives them to the Skiff station. She drops them off overlooking it. Below, a Courier Skiff has just arrived, and a crew of utility workers in olive drab suits are dragging their maintenance carts toward it to clean it up and make sure there's no sand in the gears or something.

The skiff is parked below the two-floor warehouse Shitstreak talked about. Looks like there's a guard leaning against the wall outside the door, focused more on a phone he's tapping on than the hubbub below him.

>>256107
Hmmmmmm.

Any other ways in, as long as the guard isn't looking at you?

Look for a window you can enter with a ladder or from a fire escape without being quickly spotted.

Daniels 2010/11/13(Sat)20:15 No. 256142 ID: 4f6e37
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There are no other doors that aren't rusted shut and boarded closed from lack of use. There's windows on the second floor that are open or breakable, but Sofiya's not entirely sure how to get up there, especially without a ladder. These old factories relied more on foldable shutter ladders held up on the second floor for fire safety, and fire escapes are unfortunately absent from the walls.

I see a bunch of ramps for flying cars through. Do any walls on the second floor look weak enough to fly right through it if your push the pedal to the metal? There's bound to be a few cars the gangsters use nearby that Aldo could steal so we don't have to wreck Elenas.

Flying cars through walls are usually the best improvised plans without floorplans or patrol routes. It's statistically proven in fictionland.

>>256149
This sounds totally insane.

I'm gonna have to put in a vote for it.

Actually I realize how ineffectual that plan would be. We need to drive a skiff through the building.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/13(Sat)20:56 No. 256160 ID: 4f6e37
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They could ram a car through the wall.
What? That's... what?
There's ramps and stuff. No way to get a skiff up from the desert floor or anything but they totally could ram a car through the wall. Sofiya's the one who wants to be an action hero. Aldo just wants to help her follow her dreams.
Even if they found a car and that did work and they DID get in, they've just rammed a car into a warehouse with eight armed guards inside.
Yeah, but they've got the drop on them if they do this. And if there's anyone Aldo can trust next to him in a fight to the death, it's you, sugar.
Aww, Aldo...
Even if you're the whole fucking reason he's fighting in the first place, you crazy broad.

Sofiya looks up the ramp. She is still no where near sure about this plan.
While Aldo heads over to one of the pit guys. "Do you folks have any cars allowed down here?" he asks.
"Not really, sir," says the man. "Only motorized vehicles are carts we use for tugging the heavier stuff. Cars are a bit unwieldy. If you need to park somewhere there's a parking lot nearby up above."
"How fast do those carts go?"
"Uhh," says the pit guy. "Why?"
"Just wondering."
"I don't know. Fast enough."

Go down and get a closer look at the skiff and the people staffing it. Maybe there is something there you could use as a distraction?

>>256160
If you drive in then I don't think he'll be able to stop you.
However, be smart about this crazy plan: Don't be IN the car while it's smashing through the wall. Instead, fill the car with flammable liquids that happen to actually be on fire and ram that through the wall when you are nowhere near it.
Then while they are distracted you sneak in through the back and smuggle Henry out.

Or, at least, that would be the way you would have done things if the thug had sent you to the right address. Might want to check on that before making a ruckus.

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/14(Sun)20:48 No. 256517 ID: 4f6e37
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>>256165
Probably the right place, unless you can think up another reason one of Andri's goons would be hanging around the door.
There is no back to sneak into. But yeah, they probably don't have to be in the car when it bursts through the wall. That would be in fact a bad idea, seeing as it's a solid-looking brick wall.
Sofiya heads off to go check out the parking lot and see if there are any cars left unsupervised. She finds one or two likely prospects. Aldo's the one who knows how to hot wire them with that metal magic of his.

Aldo is down at the station still talking to the skiff guys, while scoping the area out for a possible distraction. Nothing besides the big skiff itself but five or six guys and a couple women in jumpsuits. They've got a few carts on wheels, about big enough for you to fit inside if you curl up and filled with the various tools of the trade. One's leaned a ladder against the skiff and is up on top, futzing with the sails. The others are mostly hammering out dings or cleaning.
"What're you guys doing to her, anyway?" says Aldo, gesturing to the skiff.
"Just a straight up maintenance check," says the young mechanic he's talking to. "Like make sure the parts don't fall off on the return trip to Anchorturn, hose her off, that sort of thing. Why?"
"I'm a bit interested in these things," says Aldo. Sort of true. He worked as a chef on one for a while while he was avoiding a PI. That was moderately interesting. "Is there anything awry?"
"Not much," says the mechanic. "The aft canvas rudder's got a bit of a hole punched in it from a rock or something. The whole thing lists a bit to the left now, and there ain't much scrap metal to patch it, so we need to go hunting. Normally we'd just grab some from that old warehouse up there, we have for years, but there's these guys up there now give us dirty looks whenever we go near the place." He pulls a metal thingy out of his cart. "Bet they're crooks or something."
"Jerome, no saying anything bad about the neighbors," says a mechanic nearby, polishing the front cab. "Not when they may be in earshot, anyway," she mutters.

>>256517
Is that distrust on these guys' part that I hear?

Man, I'm almost tempted to try to ask these guys for anything they might know or might be able to offer, in a rather discreet fashion.

>>256517
"I'm about to blow up that warehouse's entrance with a car. Do you want me to get anything for you while I'm at it? Some eggs, a galleon of milk, a few transistors or a 6-pack? In exchange for some information on these guys, or... hell a better way in? A car is still going to blow up though, fun fireworks. Maybe I'll just nuke their cars in the parking lot to draw 'em out, what do you think?"

>>256517
"So, who's skiff is this, anyway?"

Screw jacking a car, can you imagine THIS thing busting through the wall?

>>256534
We've covered that option already. It's fixed to the desert floor

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/16(Tue)20:50 No. 257243 ID: 4f6e37
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Sofiya singles out the biggest car in the place and hangs by it, waiting for Aldo to make his decision.

"That almost sounds like distrust on your part," says Aldo.
"Really?" says the woman, innoncently. "What gave you that impression?"
"Have you even gone near the place?"
"Not since they moved in. We've been a bit too nervous to ask to go inside for scrap."
"If I told you I was here to take care of those gentlemen, how would you feel?" asks Aldo.
"Take care of them how?" says the young one.
"A fast-moving car and a hole in the wall may be involved," says Aldo.
"Well, I for one would wish you good luck and go hide," says the kid, nervously gripping his gadget. "Is that what you're going to do? Should I leave?"
"Got any information to help me with?" asks Aldo.
"Should I leave?" the kid repeats, nervously.
"Hold on now," says Aldo. "I just need to know who or what you saw in or around that building. Info, yeah?"
"Uh," says the kid. "There's this really nasty looking furlesian one, and there's also this one with like scars all over who carries a sword thing with him wherever he goes."
"A sword thing?"
"A skinny dueling sword thing," says the kid. "Like a raper."
"Rapier, hon," corrects the woman, patiently. "Look, mister, is there anything we can do for you? If you're about to do something stupid tell us right now so we can go, okay?"

hmmmm, yeah, tell them to all get in the skiff, should be safe enough for them in there.

>>257438

Sure, this. Why the hell not.

>>257243
"Yeah, we're probably about to do something stupid."

"That's probably a good idea."

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/17(Wed)22:29 No. 257623 ID: 4f6e37
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"Probably a good idea," says Aldo.
"So what, you're cops or something?" says the woman.
"We're certainly something," mutters Aldo. "Keep you and yours safe now, hear?" He marches off to go find Sofiya.

Sofiya is standing in front of the biggest thing she can find, which happens to be a delivery truck. Aldo catches sight of her and walks over.

"'Give Pizza Chance'", he says. "There's a sort of cosmic irony there you have to appreciate. Sort of."
"I'll appreciate the fuck out of it if it giveth uth a chanth to thurvive," says Sofiya. "Tho are you going to hotwire thith now?"

Daniels and Molder 2010/11/17(Wed)22:30 No. 257625 ID: 4f6e37
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"Hotwire it, fuse the accelerator to the floor, and get out of the way," says Aldo. "We don't want to be in the car when it goes through the wall, I'm telling you."
"Tho we're really going through with thith?" says Sofiya.
"Unless you have any better ideas, yes, we are," says Aldo. "So I have two plans circling the dome. We could just plow it straight through the fence and hit the building from the side. That would cause a nice big hole and all (if the fence doesn't slow us down so much that we can't get all the way through). Or..." he taps his forehead, "we could drive it down to the platform, then launch it up one of those ramps and right through the wall. That way we wouldn't have a fence or anything in our way and we'd get airborne smack dab into the wall. The problem is that guard might see it coming if we went right from straight forward and weren't fast enough, and if we don't aim right it could just fall off the ramp and then we're fucked. So safe -well, safe for a given definition of the word- and boring, or destructive and flashy?"

Suggestion 2010/11/18(Thu)01:16 No. 257674 ID: a09a03
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Destructive and flashy

Safe. Too much can go wrong.

I have developed a plan B. We are pizza deliverymen and someone seems to have ordered 50 pizzas. SOMEBODY has to pay for these.

It leads to sex so it's pretty safe AND exciting

Safe is for the police. We are not, as such, the police.