WIZARD!

Let's toast some fuckers.

Mind over matter!

...As is, though, being weak-willed would counteract the mind-powers we'd get from wizardly-ness, so we shall win through faith! St. Gerard's Orphanage.

St. Gerard's. We're gonna convert the shit out of everyone.

Mysterious Questmaster X!!MwLwtkAzV2 2010/06/05(Sat)22:25 No. 188608 ID: 2899bc
File 127580192388.png - (263.35KB , 603x527 , divine.png )

Looks like we have a majority. Good enough.

Select your Class.

Cleric: Your mastery of divine power lets you heal your allies and hamper your enemies. Your damage is somewhat behind the Paladin's, but you can attack from a distance with ease. Your long years of religious council have given you insight into the hearts of others, and a nose for trouble.

Paladin: Even though you are physically weak, your faith swings your sword and holds up your armor as well as any muscle. You deal strong damage to enemies, and can offer minor healing to both yourself and your allies. Your sense of righteousness strikes terror in the unjust and inspires the faithful.

Class Statistics available on request

>>188608
Cleric.

>>188608
Paladin up in this!
Smite bitches!

PALADIN. CLEAVE AND SMITE! CLEAVE AND SMITE!

(and punish those dogs who keep taking our underwear!)

Paladin

Pal. Adin.

Cleric. 'cause nobody ever plays a priest, and they're underrated.

Righteous Fury (paladin)

Mircosoft Paint Art is Go! Mysterious Questmaster X!!MwLwtkAzV2 2010/06/05(Sat)22:54 No. 188630 ID: 2899bc
File 127580367661.png - (28.74KB , 925x480 , Altarroom.png )

"Yow! Sister!"

Father Garter is acting odd again. He points both fingers at you and snaps, while his large, kinky hair sways to an unheard beat.

"You know you're supposed to be doing confessions today! Our great, and nice-smelling god, Invictus, demands to hear the sins of the people, so he may forgive them!"

He cocks his large eyebrows at you.

"And you KNOW the penalty for differed justice! Ow!"

He spins, and points to the icon of the sun. You vaguely recall a divine plague being described as the worst sunburn ever. How dreadful!

YOUR CLASS IS PALADIN, BY THE WAY

Paladin

HP: 20
AC: 20
STR: -1
CON: +2
DEX: +0
INT: +2
WIS: +3
CHA: +3

Attacks:

Shield Smash: +5 To-Hit/4 Damage

Special Attacks:

Shining Sword: +7 To-Hit/6 Damage. This attack deals both Fire and Holy Damage, which may be more effective against certain enemies such as the Undead.

Lay on Hands: Heal yourself or an ally you can touch 1d6+3 HP. You may only use this twice a day.

Combat Talent:

Divine Vengence: Enemies you hit with your Shield Smash take 3 Fire and Holy damage if they attack your allies before your next action.

Trained Skills:

Diplomacy: +8

Intimidate: +8

Insight: +8

Religion: +7

Appologise profusly.
Tell him we'll make it up to him and Invictus
Remdind him that we appreciate all the help he's given us throughout the years.
Then go listen to sinners so we know who to smite.

Let's go and listen to people whine about how naughty they've been.

>>188630
Tap out a phat beat!
You need to be more funky!

>>188642
Second.
Do everything as funky as possible.

Mysterious Questmaster X!!MwLwtkAzV2 2010/06/05(Sat)23:15 No. 188645 ID: 2899bc
File 127580491798.png - (29.94KB , 855x675 , Garter.png )

You dance a bit, making a bow. You try to match Garter's funkitude, but it's hard to move in this armor. As you give your gratitude to Father Garter, he grins.

"This is Divine Providence, Sister! I knew that you would be our shinin' star! Now get going!"

He shoves you out of the altar room and into the main cathedral. It's large, gold and brass hallways remind you of the sheer power of the Invictus Church. Still, you have a job, right?

You head down the hallway and into a small booth, where the sinners and devotees can come to confess their crimes against the invincible Sun.

Somebody enters the opposite side of the booth, you can't see them thanks to the obscuring screen, but they sit down and mumble to themselves, probably praying.

Technically, you don't have to say anything--in fact, now could be a good time to nod off.

>>188645

Stay awake, perhaps one of these sinners has something interesting to confess.

Also, I played this on the actual /tg/. It's good to see you keeping this up.

Remain vigilant, sister. The sun is ever watching, and so should we.

Be compassionate, yet staunch. Hear his sins.

>>188645
Stay awake by being funky.

Mysterious Questmaster X!!MwLwtkAzV2 2010/06/05(Sat)23:44 No. 188683 ID: 2899bc
File 127580666363.png - (22.59KB , 855x675 , 1-1.png )

You remain awake, humming a sweet rhyme to yourself as you listen in on the confessor.

"...and then I thought to myself, hey, he won't miss that ball of cheese yarn, so I ate it right there..."

Oh, this must be Smith Varney. He's always taking everyone's cheese. Just the other week, he was in here complaining about how he shipped a Mythrail knife to the wrong person.

...He doesn't have much more to say that's interesting, but here is the part where you can offer some wisdom, or simply let him leave.

>>188683
Offer him the wisdom of funk.
Tell him that to repent, he should grow a fro.

>>188683
His sin is three-fold.

Greed, for coveting something that belongs to someone else.
Gluttony, for eating that which need not be eaten.
Pride, for believing that he is more entitled to the cheese. Pride is typically the root cause of any sin.

Tell him to meditate on these mistakes, and on the nature of humility.

>>188686
If he's balding, shave his head and grow a goatee.

Tell him to properly repent he must stimulate his nipples daily until produces milk. He must then make this milk into cheese, and replace the stolen cheese with it anonymously.

Explain to him that the knife mishiping was clearly an act of god to punish him for his wicked ways. Surly god has found a better use for the knife in whoever now has it.
Ask him why he didnt take this punishment and learn from it, but instead continues to steal cheese?

Well the knife was just a mistake and it was last week anyway.

Tell the smith that cheese gained through unrighteous means has the most bitter aftertaste of all - guilt. He should just carry some cheese in his pocket instead to help him control his unholy urges without hurting the people around him.

>>188683
Tell him that it's all cool. Just so long as he sacrifices the cheese to the sun in a funky ritual before he eats.

>>188703
If he wishes for cheese, he should purchase it himself, shhould he not? Work for your cheese and the whole hearted effort will make it that much more delicous.

>>189713

He could always make it himself. Home made cheese. Mmm.

clearly this unfortunate smith is distracted from his duties by worldly desires.

He can bring greater success to his work, his family, and his town by releasing such distractions, as the concentrated rays of the sun can bring greater warmth.

He must understand that he's inconvenienced others by taking what was theirs. He should return to them, speak to them directly and honestly, and offer compensation for what he has stolen, perhaps in the form of his own hand wrought goods.

Mysterious Questmaster X!!MwLwtkAzV2 2010/06/08(Tue)14:09 No. 190553 ID: 2899bc
File 127603138031.png - (24.85KB , 855x675 , 1.png )

After much thinking, you decide to tell him that it would be for the best if he would try to make it up to the people he stole the cheese from. You also remind him that his tithes make sure that you can remain here to give more council in the future.

"Uh...okay. I suppose that's fair." You hear a jingling and then the sound of coin in the donation box.

Phew! That was hard work!

>>190553
Yes it was, celebrate by dancing!

>>190555
i agree, dance a little to work out the stress.

>>190553

If you're done, go find something else to occupy your time.

>>190553
Then celebrate by getting funky.

Was it? you barely did anything.

How much longer do we have to take confession?

>>190582
Shush you!
That guy was really, really boring!
That counts as hard work!

You do a little dance, pleased with yourself. Well, since you have gotten your work done, you have some free time. The cathedral is big, and you are in the Holy City after all--there must be something to do.

Lets... Go... SHOPPING!

>>190618
The Marketplace is divided into four sections! The Craftsman's quarter, the Food Markets, the Noble's Market, and the Traveler's Market (really, just a place for used, second-hand goods).

Before you leave, decide where you want to go.

>>190633
The craftsman's quarter sounds interesting let's check it out.

>>190633
Lets go to the craftsman's quarter, kupo!

>>190633

Let's buy a home cheese-making kit, and then check out the Traveler's Market for bargains.

>>190665
Agreed, and let's look for any good to be done or funk to spread.

Gotta be thrifty. Champions of goodness don't generally make much steady money. To the Traveler's Market!