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Renegade Evening Flitter
1963d1
>>315865
Holy shit what a story. Hold on, I think I have a better ending:
Suddenly, from miles away, there was a sound. A tremendous, awful sound unlike anything ever heard before. The dragon reared up suddenly, inadvertently smashing his kobold apprentice with his tremendous dick, sending the acolyte flying across the room. The dragon was terrified, for he knew that sound could mean only one thing. And yet, he allowed himself to hope against all hopes that there was some mistake, that what he had heard was merely several volcanoes erupting, or some large meteoric impact. But no, there it came again! He could hear it even more clearly now. The bolds on the bottom floor couldn't hear it, their ears were not developed enough, and they were currently preoccupied with their tremendous gay orgy. With equal parts terror and resignation, the dragon curled up and put his massive claws over his head, as if to somehow shield himself.
The kobold assistant finally managed to extract himself from the barrel he had been flung into and returned, ready to service his master, only to find the majestic blue dragon whimpering on the floor like an abused puppy in a puddle of his own urine.
"Master!" exclaimed the kobold "What is the meaning of thi-"
Suddenly a massive sound rocked the tavern. The building shook and quaked, threatening to collapse upon itself from the vibrations in the air. The acolyte was thrown off his feet onto the floor. The mass of bolds on the bottom floor stopped their wild fucking and looked up, wide eyed and afraid. The kobold assistant, too, was uneasy, and regained his balance as best he could. "Master?" he asked. "What was that?"
The dragon peeped out at his slave from behind his claws. The dragon wondered wether he should burden the mind of his faithful servant with the terrible truth of their situation, but after a panicked moment's deliberation, he decided that the bold had a right to know.
"That" squeaked the once proud dragon, "was the sound of our judgement day."
"But Master," inquired the kobold as he quaked with fear, "what exactly was that?"
The dragon had no time to answer his poor companion's question. the next moment, both of them, along with the tavern, and indeed, the entire population of the planet, were engulfed in a wave of hellfire that boiled away their skins and bones and left nothing but ashes in its wake. Then, with a mighty boom, the planet's very surface blasted apart; with a large empty pocket of space where their world once was.
"So... the dark wizard tried to cast a spell of bladder release on a peasant woman, but he failed and accidentally cast FATAL instead, destroying the entire planet. Game over." The Maim Master looked up from his rule-book. His players were all in a state of shock over what had just transpired. After taking the time to roll literally thousands of dice to generate their characters, they had all been made unwilling participants in a kobold rape orgy and then been killed. Slowly, they began to direct their attention to the Maim Master, who shrunk back in his seat.
"What the fuck was that?" Said the man who'd played the wizard's-apprentice-turned-assrape-monster. A chorus of similar questions sounded from the others gathered around the game table. The Maim Master was unable to respond with anything but mortified silence.
He had never known the day would have turned out like this. He regretted that he had he had arranged this game under the pretense that 'playing an RPG will be fun guys'. He regretted that he had just bought the first book he came across at the really weird hobby shop near where he lived. He regretted that he had vowed not to look in the book until the day of the game. He regretted that he hadn't stopped the game when the gay kobolds started popping up. But most of all, he regretted that he had delved into the world of Fantasy Adventure To Adult Lechery.
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