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Purple Braided Rose
8dbc01
hey yoshiko! i really love yr art style a whole lot UuU it's different from a lot of stuff we normally see here and i was instantly drawn to it!
you also asked for feedback so i thought i'd let you know about some stuff i noticed that you can improve on! i've noticed that a lot of times in hajime quest you just kinda flat out ignore the questers - like several people said to leave the tentacle room, and hajime didn't, people suggested ways to avoid further injury by the tentacles, hajime didn't, and when his arm was taken off people suggested over and over again for him to immediately tourniquet his arm and he didn't until several updates later (and during the updates in between he was complaining that he didn't know what to do about his arm!)
it just kind of seemed to me like you wanted him to get his arm ripped off no matter what and that you were willing to ignore suggestions for the sake of that, and that can very quickly become railroading and makes the quest a little less fun for your readers! if there's something you want to happen and quester suggestions won't change that, you should upload all the images as one continuous update - for example, if hajime was gonna get his arm ripped off no matter what, you should have just done a string of a few images with no time in between for people to suggest in which he stepped into the room, was caught by the tentacles, and got his arm ripped off. that way, it reads as "oh man - we stepped into the dark room and this is the consequence as a plot point" as opposed to "oh, come on! we told him to leave, why did this still happen anyway?"
i'd also suggest waiting to have more than one suggestion in between updates so you can get a better feel for what the readers want hajime to do. other than that it looks gr8! keep up the good work!
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