Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:19 No. 143158 ID: 9246cb
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Lady Poodle: "My lords, it appears that Lady Tanna has arrived. The person who you have to give the gift."

Prince Hollow Heart: "Let me just check your drawing, just to be sure."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:20 No. 143159 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Yeah that is her, but why does she look like she has rabies."

Lady Poodle: "I just like things that are slowly dying in a painful way, to me that is beautiful in a morbid way."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:20 No. 143160 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "Fine, just don't go around and say that to others, it will freak them out. Also, why are you as tall as me?"

Lady Poodle: "That is how I want to be perceived."

Prince Hollow Heart: "Whatever, I will go and talk to her."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:21 No. 143161 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Hello little one, just look how adorable you are! Your little eyes, the hat, the paws, and your tail. I could just hug you forever and ever and ever and ever! How can something as cute as you exist? You truly have been blessed by the love of gods."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:22 No. 143162 ID: 9246cb
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Lady Poodle: "I have to tell you Hollow Heart that we are not allowed to feed our worms here. So just give the gift, no need to compliment her."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/17(Tue)15:25 No. 143163 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "I must apologize how my other half acted. You are my target for this festive ritual, so do you accept the gift that was your name on it?"

tippler 2024/12/18(Wed)16:05 No. 143168 ID: f1368b
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Flygon chows down on the most delicious scrap he's ever encountered, some chewy savory fried little wedge with a crispy crunchy tail. Is it some kind of specially made tofu? Whatever it is, the taste is remarkable.

Smeargle is sitting on the tall couch next to him as they watch the unfolding party.

Flygon, I think that's meat.

Whoa, they eat people here? Hardcore.

Yeah, it's not your fault since you didn't know but maybe don't have any more.

tippler 2024/12/18(Wed)16:08 No. 143169 ID: f1368b
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Flygon sticks to the finest confirmed vegetarian food and drink until he's satisfied. With a sigh he leans back on the couch.

You got the gift, right? We can hand it off as soon as we see 'em.

Got it right here. TM02, Dragon Claw!

The perfect move for any dragon!

1/2 Tanna 2024/12/20(Fri)11:59 No. 143174 ID: 9ed8c4
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...

Haha, I’m in danger.

2/2 Tanna 2024/12/20(Fri)12:01 No. 143176 ID: bf1721
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“Eh… erm… s-sure…”

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/21(Sat)13:38 No. 143184 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Splendid, you will not regret it. Lady Poodle, give me the gift."

Lady Poodle: "Wasn't I supposed to be the one to give the gift."

Princess Hollow Heart: "Do not listen to what my other half told you! Now give it!"

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/21(Sat)13:38 No. 143185 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Here is your present the eagle of deliverance told me that you have a passion for playing music so my gift will be the harmonica holder. Now you can play that instrument without the need to use your hands."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/21(Sat)13:40 No. 143186 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "But that music tool has another function. You can fold it in and then it becomes a blade."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/21(Sat)13:43 No. 143187 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "The duality of this gift also related to you Tanna, your unknown past and uncertain future. So my question is this which gift do you want to receive, the music tool or the knife?"

Kakroon 2024/12/27(Fri)12:06 No. 143207 ID: 681cb5
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Tozlan: “So… looking at this Secret Sand Man invitation we got, we’re supposed to give a present to some aliens who are clearly far below our technological level. In fact, seeing how they are going around naked, live in a cave and have nude magazine, they are clearly stone age, maybe early bronze age.” the Raolme rubs his chin, “So we need to make sure we don’t accidently give them anything to advance that might ruin their world.”
Tizli: “I know the perfect present!” Tizli brandishes a Sonic Destabilizer from… somewhere, “A big handgun!”
Tozlan: “…what?”
Tizli: “This bad boy can liquefy someone’s internal organs from over 100 meters away!”
Tozlan: “We’re not giving the cave people a gun, sis!” the alien sighs, “Don’t be stupid!”
Tizli: “Aw man… you’re no fun.”
Tozlan: “No, our first present will be this!” Tozlan pulls out a lighter and produces a small flame, “BEHOLD, PRIMITIVE PEOPLE! A stick that can create flames! No longer will you need to crush insect shells, rubs sticks together or beat rocks against each other to create fire! With this, you simply need to press this part and a fire will be created, dispelling the great dark around you! Amazing, isn’t it?”
Tizli: “Tsk… I have a better idea…”

Kakroon 2024/12/27(Fri)12:07 No. 143208 ID: 681cb5
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Tozlan: “Next, a reflective disk that will show you what you look like!” the Raolme puts up a mirror in front of him, “Look! I can see myself in there! A real pearl from the foam, if I have to say so myself. Don’t worry, it won’t steal your soul… nor is anyone stuck inside it, I promise.”
Tizli: “And our last gift is a rifle, which will make someone’s bone vibrate out from their bodies from up to 8 kilometers away!”
Tozlan: “No.”
Tizli: “But-”
Tozlan: “No.”
Tizli: “Come on, bro…”

Kakroon 2024/12/27(Fri)12:07 No. 143209 ID: 681cb5
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Tozlan: “And finally, we… um… have a… err… this food making machine? I mean, it’s not much and you guys probably already invited something like this but…” Tozlan grabs a handful of hazelnut shells and shove them into the machine, “It can take any kind of organic material and turn it into something edible.” before pressing a button and making a hamburger appear from thin air, “I even made sure this little pearl will make food from your world, like this ham bun! I hope it isn’t to disappointing compared to the other things. Oh, and Tizli? No.”
Tizli: “But-”
Tozlan: “I SAID NO! Don’t give the cave people a scumsucking nuke!”
Tizli: “Aw…”

Kakroon 2024/12/27(Fri)12:07 No. 143210 ID: 681cb5
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Tozlan: “Flygon and Smeargle! Happy Secret Sand Man! Here is your gift!”

A Fire Creating Stick! (Lighter)
A Disc of Self Image! (Mirror)
A Food Maker! (Consumable Bio Mass Converter 30xD)

Tozlan: “We hope this package finds you well!”
Tizli: “May the Claws of Sand bring you much merriment!”

tippler 2024/12/27(Fri)12:57 No. 143212 ID: f1368b
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The two guests that most resemble Pokemon approach Flygon and Smeargle and hand them a gift, much to the Hoenn natives' surprise. Flygon warmly thanks them.

tippler 2024/12/27(Fri)13:04 No. 143213 ID: f1368b
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And what great riches lie within the green box! The mons untie the ribbon and handle the relatively high tech gifts.

Smeargle, this device turns waste into food! These aliens have really advanced toilets.

That's awesome Flygon, check out this lighter, I really like the purple pink flame.

And best of all, a lovely mirror we can hang in the den. It'll make self-portraits a lot easier to paint.

Thanks Tozlan and Tizli!

1/2 Tanna 2024/12/27(Fri)15:40 No. 143216 ID: afd433
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>>143187

Woah, that’s actually fucking sweet! The knife is so cool! Look at how sharp it is! The harmonica bit is also really handy! They really knew exactly what I wanted!

Hm, why are they asking me which one I want though? Doesn’t it switch into both? What’re they talking about with my duality? Obviously I want the holder more.

...I want the holder more, right? I… hmm. I guess I kinda like that, but the knife. It’s really cool… and sharp. I bet it could… heh. But won’t people think I’m weird for accepting a weapon at a party? I really shouldn’t…

>>143207

Huh, are they talking about weapons over there? M-Maybe accepting one wouldn’t be so bad? They’re kinda flaunting them around, and I guess it’s not any weirder than the gift I have for my secret santa. I… I really want the knife way more.

2/2 Tanna 2024/12/27(Fri)15:41 No. 143217 ID: e03986
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“If… if it’s not too much trouble, I’d like to accept the knife.”

Nalthar 2024/12/28(Sat)09:45 No. 143222 ID: 6c233e
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Lisel climbs out of the punch bowl. "Wow, what a kiss!" As she drags herself over the edge, a vial falls out of her pocket. The punch starts to slightly discolor as the unknown chemical mixes in, a fun surprise for the next thirsty party goer.

Surrep catches the pink tinted mouse, setting her on soggy feet. "Alright, this party is getting dangerous. Let us deliver the present and get going."

"But isn't that apple pie over there?"

"...Let us deliver the present and get pie."

Nalthar 2024/12/28(Sat)09:45 No. 143223 ID: 6c233e
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Flashback
The rats are in the decrepit dining hall, gathering fancy things for a royal gift.

"Are you sure these are good enough?" Surrep asks, rubbing at a grimy spoon. "They're all tarnished."

"That just shows they are real silver." Lisel says, searching through the forest of bottles on the condiment tree. "Rich people must like the taste, or else why don't they just use wood?"

Eventually they find enough utensils to fill a raggedy roll of red velvet. There is an oyster fork, a sugar scoop, the lid to a salt cellar, an antler handled carving knife, three butter knives, six forks, two soup spoons, a slotted spoon for absinthe, and a pouch they dumped various spices into.

Nalthar 2024/12/28(Sat)09:46 No. 143224 ID: 6c233e
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Retrieving the rolled up velvet from under the table, the mice make their clanky way over to their target. Completely disregarding that Hollow Heart is clearly in the middle of a conversation, they walk right up and tug on a tentacle. "! ! !" Surrep says something but it's too small to make out.

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:50 No. 143228 ID: 9246cb
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Lady Poodle: "Hollow Heart, one of those rats that I was observing is trying to get your attention."

Prince Hollow Heart: "Yeah I know, I just need to give my gift and then I will see what it wants. Now then Tanna, I sense sadness, guilt, and shame when you are asking for the knife."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:51 No. 143229 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "The gift that I am giving to you can be used in both ways, I only asked what your preference would be. What you are more gravitating towards and your honest answer is. There is nothing to be ashamed of."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:52 No. 143230 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "That forgotten past is your past self and I know that part of you still exist. Never erase it, learn from it, and embrace it."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:52 No. 143231 ID: 9246cb
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Prince Hollow Heart: "You can be the musician and the one who brings the silence. And wherever the reason for your past killing was just remember one thing, in the profession of killing you managed to come to the other side still alive. Not many can claim they accomplished that."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:53 No. 143232 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Do not listen to him, my other half can sometimes be a really rude person. Your past doesn't define you and if you want to make music it doesn't mean it has to be from screaming victims. I believe that you won't make the same mistakes from your past."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/28(Sat)16:54 No. 143233 ID: 9246cb
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Princess Hollow Heart: "But if you did kill somebody it probably was for a good reason. Maybe you did it in order to protect somebody or for monetary reasons. Whatever it was you should embrace your more positive new profession. A beautiful flower can bloom from the dirty ground."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/30(Mon)00:50 No. 143237 ID: b9c033
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Prince Hollow Heart: "Alright let's look what this rat has brought to me. So this appears to be fancy silverware fit for a king, but looking at all the eating tools I only see like little faces."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/30(Mon)00:52 No. 143238 ID: b9c033
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Prince Hollow Heart: "I understand what all of this is, you are offering yourself to be eaten. Is that what rats here are, a delicacy? Fine, I will try it, but if this is some other parasite's plan to get into my system you will regret getting into my stomach."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/30(Mon)00:53 No. 143239 ID: b9c033
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Lady Poodle: "Hollow Heart, I think that the rat is just giving you a gift and it doesn't want to be eaten."

Absurdity DeVoid 2024/12/30(Mon)00:54 No. 143240 ID: b9c033
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Well it is a very thoughtful gift. It probably wasn't easy for such a small creature to get this gift."

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:35 No. 143398 ID: e61200
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Meanwhile, a few hours prior; in the Fangndr siblings rinky dinky mountain cave modest but totally respectable two-bedroom lair.


Isolde: So remember, we have to make sure we are picturing the same creature in order for the spell to work, otherwise we’ll have to start over or-

Wilhelm: or worse, we end up a complete mess and medical fees for three-headed dragons are a pain. Yeah, yeah, we’ve done this, what? Two dozen times already?

Ajosha: Twety-two, actually! Not counting the other times we’ve practiced casting a spell like this, of course.

Wilhelm: And yes, we are making sure to keep the gifts inside the teleporting circle before we leave, “wIThoUt tOUchiNg AnY of tHe linES.”

Ajosha: Hee hee hee!

Isolde: Don’t mock me, you two! I’m just making sure we get it all right. I don’t want us getting hurt instead of having fun!

Wilhelm: Yeah, we know. It’s just tiring, that’s all.

Ajosha: We love you, sis.

Wilhelm: Aaaanyway, we casting the spell now or what?

Isolde: Sure, say when you are ready.

Ajosha: Ready!

Wilhelm: Let’s get this polymorph rolling!


*WHOOOOM*

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:36 No. 143399 ID: e61200
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Ajosha: There they are! Hello there!

Wilhelm: How’s it hanging, chumps! It’s us, your secret santas!

Isolde: Wilhelm, manners! But yes, we are your holiday gift-givers. It’s a pleasure to meet you.

Ajosha: Err, sorry if our appearance is.. discomforting. It’s not easy for dragons to fit into smaller folk’s buildings without a shrinking spell of some kind and, well, we wanted to look a way that was special for you!

Wilhelm: Speaking of “special for you”, we’ve got a triplet treat of gifts, picked straight from our hoard, that we think both you and your family will love… Mine first!

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:38 No. 143400 ID: e61200
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Wilhelm: Behold, the Tuber Cornucopia!

We know you guys have a lot of kids and keeping them all fed is important to races that don’t favor just the strongest ones, so with this magic horn will ensure you never run out of potatoes to feed them!


Isolde: A farmer gave it to us as a long-standing tribute, but we never found much use for it.


Wilhelm: But you two will love it! Potatoes are all the rage among veggie eaters, and with this, you can finally live the dream!

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:39 No. 143401 ID: e61200
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Isolde: On my part, I picked something that more pertinent to your more professional needs, Miss Yamelle. I understand you are a masseuse, correct?

These aromatic candles are enchanted with ancient fae spells that ensure whoever inhales their perfume will envision very vivid sights and sensations that their mind deeply links to a pleasant experience.

Your workplace may become a beachside or a mountaintop before their eyes; your fingers on their backs would be like the softest silk; and the overall experience will feel like they are ten feet tall. Literally, should they have longed for it.


Ajosha: Just be sure to light them in advance before you meet a client, give the smoke time to fill up the room a bit.


Isolde: On that note, I made sure to purchase a large enough box to last you a while. It contains fourty candles. That’s as many as four tens.


Wilhelm: And that’s expensive!

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:40 No. 143402 ID: e61200
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Ajosha: My turn! My turn!

*Ahem*

I’ve saved the best for last; a very rare and priced item of ours: an idol of the Nimble-Limbed God. Whosoever shows it due respect, and presses their palm and head upon it n reverence shall be granted, for a few hours at a time, the boon of four arms!


Isolde: We got after a disagreement with the local cult, near our cave.


Wilhelm: Those guys tasted kinda gummy.


Ajosha: This item is very, very special to us; it hurts to part with it, but I and my siblings agreed a heartfelt gift needs to be meaningful, and I can’t think of anything more meaningful in the world than being able to interact with it to the fullest!


Wilhelm: Just be sure to give it weekly offerings of hand moisturizer and nail-clippings. It likes those, for some reason.

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:42 No. 143403 ID: e61200
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Ajosha: It’s not every day a dragon gives up some of its hoard, especially for strangers. You must feel honored to be given have such peculiar presents


Isolde: We are sure and your loved ones make the most of them.


Ajosha: Speaking of which, we would love to meet them if they are here tonight. It was very kind of you to invite us to this snow resort. Every corner of it we have seen so far looks fantastic!

Silly Zealot 2025/02/06(Thu)19:45 No. 143404 ID: e61200
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Wilhelm: Great dragon in the sky, look! A dead body!


Ajosha: You are right! How did we not notice before?


Isolde: It looks to me this person has died of suspect circumstances.


Wilhelm: I don’t want to look over my shoulder for the rest of the night, we gotta solve this murder!


Isolde: You are right, but how do we go about this? Determine the cause of death? Interrogate the other guests?


Ajosha: Oh! Oh! I’ve got it! We could hold a séance and ask the dead himself who killed him!


Isolde: Oh, of course! A séance!


Wilhelm: Yeah. Great thinking, brah!


Isolde: Finding chalk to draw a ritual circle should be easy. Only other thing we need is a couple volunteers to join in.



[b]Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and Joyous Season-Appropiate Chupian HolidaysSarcopholacooda!

tippler 2025/02/07(Fri)12:06 No. 143406 ID: f1368b
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Smeargle thinks she spots their gift target, but something's different about them. They're looking smaller and furrier than their internet picture. Well, she shouldn't judge, dragons come in all shapes and types, just like Flygon.

Hi Wilhelm, Ajosha, and Isolde! Here's your gift.

Don't forget that Dragon Claw is a special attacking move in Gen 3. It's no infinite food machine but I think it'll come in handy.

Sarcopholacooda 2025/02/09(Sun)13:32 No. 143419 ID: 28dff5
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Yamelle: Oh! There you are, husband! I was wondering where you’ve moseyed off to!

Dama: Huh? -ghk- Oh r ig ht.

Dama: I’ve-ff been ssampling the entire w i n e cellar. Don’t wor-ry, I’ve c areffull y mon i toredmy alcohol inn take. I’ve only ssips from a-hunn dred-somethin’ botttles.

Dama: Wash the emergencyy?

Yamelle: Oh it’s nothing! Which reminds me. We have to give our secret santas our gift before we leave!

Dama: Didchew brang it?

Yamelle: Bring what?

Dama: That’s what I wanna know!

Dama: Oh rright I g ott it.

Sarcopholacooda 2025/02/09(Sun)13:32 No. 143420 ID: 28dff5
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Dama: For you, Lisel and Surrep. A bottle of Handcr a f t ed and vil lage-made Fermented Spring Yakbeet Spirits. Schitsy-Threeve pe r cent alco hall. All the t i m e. Here.

Yamelle: Dear, they’re not in the cellar. Come back to the ballroom with me! We can slow dance and mingle with the others.

Dama: Sorry I’m w a iting my wife for to be finished... sso git off you cuddle whore.

Yamelle: Did you say something? You’re mumblin’ bumsy, silly~! Follow my voice.

Dama: Wheh?! Oh. Yes, wife.

Absurdity DeVoid 2025/02/14(Fri)10:15 No. 143441 ID: 477903
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Prince Hollow Heart: "Princess stop hugging Tanna, you know that we both can't exist separated for too long."

Absurdity DeVoid 2025/02/14(Fri)10:17 No. 143442 ID: 477903
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Princess Hollow Heart: "I know I know, I just wanted to cheer her up. She seemed so sad when she picked up her gift."

Prince Hollow Heart: "I know, that is your curse, you care to much. But I did find something, a skull."

Princess Hollow Heart: "Where dud you find a skull?"

Absurdity DeVoid 2025/02/14(Fri)10:19 No. 143443 ID: 477903
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Prince Hollow Heart: "You shouldn't ask where I found it and more what I will use it for and it is to bring back your pet kitty."

Princess Hollow Heart: "Oh it is prefect, I will call her Guillotine. Give her to me"

Prince Hollow Heart: "What can I say, the day felt perfect for giving you a present. Also be careful she may be a little bit jumpy."

Absurdity DeVoid 2025/02/14(Fri)10:20 No. 143444 ID: 477903
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Princess Hollow Heart: "Ahh, she jumped out of my hand."

Prince Hollow Heart: "I warned you."

Absurdity DeVoid 2025/02/14(Fri)10:25 No. 143445 ID: 477903
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Prince Hollow Heart: "And look at him now, even if he is a corps, he can't resist sleeping somewhere he shouldn't."

Princess Hollow Heart: "Will she damage the goat corps?"

Prince Hollow Heart: "Not sure, he may decapitate his head is he is removed too abruptly, or peel off his face if he stays too long on it."

Princess Hollow Heart: "Well she will live up to her name then. I apologize for making that joke."