Hug the nearest,fuzziest thing till you're more awake.

Check proximity of Nezu to crotch area.

>>81917
You're not buried underground, are you?

Wakey wakey, are you nakey?

have orgasm asap

Tura 2009/11/26(Thu)19:51 No. 81928 ID: b1e366
File 125929386336.png - (209.23KB , 1024x768 , 2.png )

>>81919
She's well clear of it.
>>81927
Why would I... Nevermind.
>>81925
No.

oh you can sleep for five more minutes :3c

>>81928
Aww.

Well, get her off you and get dressed. What is your financial situation?

>>81928
Hug her back.

>>81928

Yank her ear. "Wake up, lazy!"

you would orgasm because it feels good

DUH

whatever, wake up lazyass

she looks so sadly adorable when she's sleeping ;_;

Let her sleep a few minutes more.

Stay still for ten more minutes while you mentally give us a recap.

Hurl her bodily off of the bed, and start yelling at her for oversleeping. You have a job to do, after all.

Get up! It's a brand new day! Full of hope and wonder and potentially coffee!

>>81968
Agreed, we have to instill proper obedience in her!

Tura 2009/11/26(Thu)21:40 No. 82032 ID: b1e366
File 125930043837.png - (159.04KB , 1024x768 , 3.png )

I'm up. I'm up. I guess I should think of something productive to do.

Theta][Sigma 2009/11/26(Thu)21:42 No. 82036 ID: f21281
File 125930052244.jpg - (37.16KB , 450x600 , 193.jpg )

>>82032

Hug rat, cure shivering.

You must do what has to be done by you. Umm, go see what needs to be done I suppose. We need money badly.

>>82032
Wrap rat in blanket, get dressed and go check to see if you have enough money it takes to buy a ferry ride across the river or something.

>>82032
Right, productive... I got nothin'. Was that just one night, or have you been here a while? We're not too good at the whole "constant time" thing.

A brief recap and list of assets/leads/quests might be nice.

You look tired. Or older. How long have you been here?

>>82056
HUG RAT
READ CROTCH

RAT CROTCH
READ HUG

Tura 2009/11/27(Fri)17:21 No. 82294 ID: b1e366
File 125937130664.png - (183.32KB , 1024x768 , 4.png )

I guess I could go after the elves or maybe there's something more interesting to do here. I'm out in the world now and just grabbing my father and heading straight home would be too boring, I think.

"Lost my pillows..."

>>82294

Let's see what the day brings.

>>82294
well then, first thing first: PANCAKES. get some breakfest for Nezu and yourself, then go to the baths. again.

>>82294
I wonder if they have a sewer system here? Check in with Dr Boldsworth for a little bit, then ask Nezu if there are any interesting things she has seen in the city as a wandering waif?

where are we exactly

>>82294
There's nothing that says we have to drag him straight home. Y'know. We could just torment him relentlessly. Get in some quality father/daughter time.
We should probably continue asking everyone we meet in an easily distracted going to ignore you once I finish this question oh look a shiny sortof way.
You know, like we've been doing.

>>82299
Seconding pancakes. And bacon!

The trail of your father is allready super cold. Waiting isnt going to make it any easier to find him. Get on his ass, stat, girl.

>>82294
Let's go see what they do for fun in this two-bit cesspool. Do we have the day off?

Grab the mouse, smush her into your chest. Make remark about pillows.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)10:07 No. 82588 ID: b1e366
File 125943167883.png - (109.93KB , 1024x768 , 5.png )

"You want pillows, I'll give you pillows!"

"Eeeek! Can't breath!"

...

>>82588
Flash him.

Both of you.

>>82588
Prepare to unleash MARSHMALLOW HELL upon the kobold!

>>82588
Notice the blood trickling from his nose and become concerned.
Ask him if he got in a fight, then squish him into your chest and wail about what kind of monster would attack a kindly old kobold alchemist as lovable as him.

Conveniently forget you might be the kind of person who would do such a thing, if he weren't paying you.

>>82588
Inform the little pervert that you get paid overtime for peepshows.

>>82593
Sounds like a plan right there.

>>82592
Seconding this.
Both of you pick him up and hug.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)13:35 No. 82653 ID: b1e366
File 125944410256.png - (110.55KB , 1024x768 , 6.png )

"I need you two to gather some things for a potion order I need to complete... Yes. I can't seem to find the door that leads outside, so you'll have to go."

>>82653
ROAD TRIP!

>>82653
Lean down to hear him better.
Make sure to cross your arms so as to emphasise your cleavage.
Ask him what he needs.

>>82653
Ask him where we'll find the MacGuffins.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)14:36 No. 82688 ID: b1e366
File 125944781613.png - (147.02KB , 1024x768 , 7.png )

"I just need some mushrooms. They're reasonably common in caves. Just pick as many of the long, glowing blue ones and bring them back. I'd go myself, but I can hardly see. I walked nose first into the corner of the table on the way in here..."

TO THE CAVES!
We were made for this!

>>82688
I'm curious as to how he knows they're blue.

>>82702
Well, he might have gathered them before his vision went. Or he might have read the description out of a book, or been told a description.

Or maybe if he gets really really close he sees a blue blob.

>>82702
Obviously he can smell colour. Duh.

>>82688
He wants you to pluck some "blue mushrooms?"

Sounds like we're hunting for lorhke sperm, ladies. Everyone knows that the slang for lorhke penis is "blue mushroom."

One your way to the mushrooms, keep an eye out for a small but sturdy stick that the kobOLD can use as a seeing cane.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)17:34 No. 82916 ID: b1e366
File 125945849531.png - (112.99KB , 1024x768 , 8.png )

Alright. We just follow the shore until it gets rocky and we get caves. Now to find fungus for the 'bold.

>>82916
Tura go first

>>82916
Go ahead and dive nose-first into the big open gash. See if you can find a big, plump mushroom while you're in there.

>>82922
Just make sure you don't plunge in unprotected.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)17:59 No. 82947 ID: b1e366
File 125945994830.png - (103.04KB , 1024x768 , 9.png )

Nothing interesting yet. It just keeps going around the corner ahead and there's a small fissure in the wall here.

>>82947
Check the fissure. If there's nothing there, proceed onward.

>>82947
Nezu put your muzzle in the crevice

Just like last night

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)18:26 No. 82976 ID: b1e366
File 125946157370.png - (95.10KB , 1024x768 , 10.png )

>>82949
It's too small for me to fit and I can't see to the end.

>>82976
SEND IN THE RAT. Its time she earned her keep.

Please tell me we brought a light source. Send in our tunnel rat, that's what they're for.

Tura 2009/11/28(Sat)19:30 No. 82988 ID: b1e366
File 125946542278.png - (114.92KB , 1024x768 , 11.png )

>Send in the rat.


"It smells funny in here..."

"That's just your nose getting used to you not smelling like an open sewer. Get in there!"

>>82988
<3 <3 Nezu <3

Keep her firmly gripped so you can yank her back as need be.

>>82988
What does it smell like, exactly?

>>82988
Tura: Equip Strapon

>>82988
Ask her if she sees anything interesting.

>>82988
Keep a close eye on RAT ASS.

For safety's sake, you know.

>>83146
Just to elaborate... Nezu is a valuable ally and resource, and we don't want anything to happen to her ass. We want to make sure that we protect our resources so we can tap them later. Er... tap her as a resource, I mean.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)08:59 No. 83168 ID: b1e366
File 125951396025.png - (76.93KB , 1024x768 , 12.png )

(Control has switched to Nezu)

Wah! It's cramped and dirty in here and it smells funny, but there's a bigger room here now.

Suggestion 2009/11/29(Sun)09:03 No. 83171 ID: 88d217
File 12595141882.png - (174.69KB , 600x600 , rat ass copy.png )

>>83168
Smells funny how?

>>83168
Oh gawd, looks like you have entered a ... rock vagina?

Don't touch the walls. Carefully continue forwards.

>>83168
Does it smell like Tura's bathing suit area?

>>83168
Nezu what do your rat eyes see.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)11:09 No. 83196 ID: b1e366
File 12595217692.png - (216.27KB , 1024x768 , 13.png )

I found the smell.

>>83196
Its adorable quick jump on its back and give it a BIG HUG. Then tame it and turn it into your new pet.

>>83196
Oh shit look at those kissable lips god damn lick his face or something

>>83196
Milk it, that will calm it down and set it to purring.

>>83196
Back up slowly, no sudden movements. Or quickly and all in one sudden movement.

>>83202
It's in its larval stage she can't milk it...yet.

>>83196
Engage ratlike combat skills!

>>83196
It's a larva. Run, before it's mother find you.

scream TURA THERE IS A THING IN HERE HEEEEEEELP and try to get out of there.

Hey look, a giant larvi! I wonder how big it'll get once it grows up.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)13:27 No. 83256 ID: b1e366
File 125953002694.png - (75.83KB , 1024x768 , 14.png )

>>83236
>>83241
"THING IS AFTER ME HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALP!~"

>>83256
TURA GRAB NEZU

>>83258

> TURA IS A TEMPORARY INDIRECT PC

>>83256
did you lose your shirt, Nezu?

>>83256
FLEE HARDER!

I think its a carrion crawler.

>>83281
Pretty sure they have paralyzing tendrils. That looks to have been an rather large grub, or perhaps a purring maggot of the unusual size to match our rats.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)15:08 No. 83295 ID: b1e366
File 125953613420.png - (225.45KB , 1024x768 , 15.png )

Phew... I'm not eaten. That's good. Tura pulled me out.

"What the hell is it?"

"Big worm... Big worm... trying to eat me."

>>83295
NEZU HUG TURA

>>83295
Idea
1.Use yourself as bait
2. Lure crawler out with promise off an easy meal
3. Have Nezu hide in the shadows
4. Surprise attack and capture or kill the worm
5.????
6.Profit.

>>83306
Tura won't fit in the crevice. She ain't rat-sized.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)15:52 No. 83312 ID: b1e366
File 125953872017.png - (87.10KB , 1024x768 , 16.png )

>>83306
No need. It comes to us!

>>83312
Find Rock. Bash thing with rock as it comes out.

We don't have anything to trap it with, so we should probably just get Nezu to waggle her ass in front of the hole while we wait off to the side and bring the ax down on its head like a guillotine when it comes out.

Okay, I think Tura can just kill it with her Dwarven Waraxe. Try helping out with the dagger, though.

>>83312
That is horrifying on many levels.

Axe to the head.

You did bring weapons, right? If so, work on leveling up your axe skills.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)16:45 No. 83344 ID: b1e366
File 125954192178.gif - (208.38KB , 1024x768 , 17.gif )

>>83314
"I don't like this idea!"

"Quiet, you big baby. THIS WILL WORK!"

>>83344
CHOP! CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP!

>>83344
Hack, whack, and smack.
In that order.
If the bait gets damaged, make sure to apologise and bandage it while she sits on your lap.

>>83344
Hassan Chop!

Tura 2009/11/29(Sun)18:17 No. 83388 ID: b1e366
File 12595474621.png - (179.11KB , 1024x768 , 18.png )

HIY- OH GODS IT STINKS!

>>83388
It's smiling. This is either coincidence, or it knows something we don't. Probably something involving momma larvae thing eating you alive.

>>83388
Well it's dead.

Ok no mushrooms.

Go further into the cave! Find mushrooms!

>>83388
Do you even have a nose? No matter. Move the thing out of the way and send the rat in again. Give her a knife or something.

>>83388
Keep its head it might be useful to sell it off.

MAKE IT'S HEAD INTO AN AWESOME PUPPET

NAME IT MISTER SMILEY

Tura 2009/11/29(Sun)19:41 No. 83422 ID: b1e366
File 125955251743.png - (195.37KB , 1024x768 , 19.png )

>>83416
"Rawr."

>>83422
and the best thing is since the head is an exoskeleton it will never rot.

>>83422
Now you're going to have to wash that hand off. I mean, really, you actually got that on you?

Cut it open and make sure it hasn't swallowed anything expensive. Evil worm things are always swallowing expensive things like gems, gold coins, babies...

>>83422
"I AM THE CRAB QUEEN AND ALL VERMIN GIRLS SHOULD OBEY ME OR SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE CRAB CLAW BUTT PINCH"

Keep it forever as a trophy.

>>83422
Now that thats taken care of Nezu back in the cave.

>>83430
Monsters without pockets do have a curious tendency to contain random manufactured goods.

Nezu 2009/11/29(Sun)21:38 No. 83501 ID: b1e366
File 125955950769.png - (135.30KB , 1024x768 , 20.png )

Now I can go get the stuff I was almost ate for and that stuff is... A big pile of maggot poop.

...

Make this face >:(

>>83501
Does it have long blue mushrooms on it?

>>83501
Get angry at Tura for risking your life for this.

>>83501
You've got the mouth right. Now just make your eyes go orange. Let the fury bleach all the colour from your fur and bathe your hair in the nearest living creature's blood.

Then the cycle will be complete.

>>83501
Well, that was pointless. Go explore the rest of the cave.

>>83509
>>83501
How IS the ol' home village doing these days, Nez?

>>83509
Vast and copious nosebleeds would rather be more traditional for that expression I think.

>>83501
Anything among the poop? Any mushrooms? What about further tunnels?

Don't forget to check the worms guts for loot

Wow, I bet that maggot poo sells for a lot. You're Rich!

Gut that fucking worm and make your grandmother proud.

Also feel saddened by the lack of nearby males for blood covered raping afterwards.

Btw am I the only one who thinks Tura should add "Find more genetic material for the keep." to her quest list?

>>83721
Who needs males, rape Nezu

>>83727
Well that would be fun. But remember the story of a love that has held for two decades. The story of how her grandmother and grandfather fell in love, while making hot sex on a pile of very dead dwarfs that grandmother had just brutally killed.

Gotta move with the times. Rape Nezu.

Fine rape Nezu.

But I still think that she should get some more males for the keep. Poor old Nako hasn't had any except kobolds for a long time. She needs something more than kobolds and cats.

Seduce Nezu over a series of years by being her caretaker and faithful campanion.

then rape her.

No raping Nezu, you two are new friends and that won't go a long way towards keeping her as a friend.

Anyway, go further into the cave and stop dicking around with the maggot nest.

Get the dildos already so you can enact your plan to slowly poison that kobold employer of yours and steal all his crap.

You can't rape the willing. Build up a great friendship with Nezu over an extended period of time, them let it blossom into "something more".

ITT: A one track mind

Seriously, while we all enjoy a little nosebleed service, the constant "RAPERAPERAPE" is getting kind of tiresome.

>>84304
Then think about it from a character development perspective. Rape is good no matter how you slice it.

Actually, I've changed my mind. Continue searching for shrooms.

Nezu can be raped later, in the city, on a comfortable bed.

If there's nothing besides maggot poop get out and go find the mushrooms.

Tura 2009/12/02(Wed)18:38 No. 85035 ID: b1e366
File 125980792394.png - (86.92KB , 1024x768 , 21.png )

Moving away from the stinking oozing corpse, we come to a fork in the tunnel. I can't decide which way to check first.

Go the side route.

For the love of god, do not split up.

TO THE LEFT!

>>85035
Go left

Go left why not.

>>85035
A leftist philosophy fills this board.

Left it is.

>>85035
Everyone goes right first.

Go left.

>>85035
go left, make an awesome pose as you do so.

I keep hearing good things about left.

All the interesting shit (ie traps) is always on the right. Let us take the left today.

You know what's on the left? Pinko commie faggots, that's what.

You know what's on the right? Fascist nazi bastards, that's what.

Tunnel through the fucking centre. If you see a fork in the road, TAKE IT.

Close your eyes, spin around until you get dizzy, and stagger forward. If you end up going back out of the cave instead of down a fork, you win!

Stick Left. Just keep a wall to your left, and you'll never get lost. You don't want to be lost, as you want to rape nezu when you get back in town.

Tura 2009/12/04(Fri)19:20 No. 86070 ID: b1e366
File 125998322844.png - (177.96KB , 1024x768 , 22.png )

I decide to go left, which is good, because the things we want are here.

>>86070
wow thats... fortunate
pick some mushrooms
then sodomize nezu with them

>>86070
Watch out for an interruption from that crack there.

>>86075
Nonsense, there certainly is nothing there at all.

>>86070
Get your dildshrooms and go back to the Professor to get paid.

>>86070
Ask Nezu to go in the crack and laugh at her reaction. Then grab the mushrooms and leave.

>>86078
On second thought let's explore that other passage before leaving. There could be TREASAH!

Tura 2009/12/05(Sat)15:19 No. 86281 ID: b1e366
File 126005515570.png - (262.14KB , 1024x768 , 23.png )

>>86078
"You know the drill. Get in the hole."

>>86281
Commence cat smile + "Just kidding." and hoof it back.

>>86281
Tickle her and say "Just kidding!"

Silently word "just kidding" and kiss her passionately.

>>86282
>>86299
>>86300
Don't listen to these fagets. She goes in the hole. There could be treasure.

>>86281
Hug+grope.
Get MASHROOMS and OUT.

>>86281
I hope you can roll an 80 in escape artist.

Tura 2009/12/05(Sat)17:46 No. 86368 ID: b1e366
File 126006396334.png - (194.05KB , 1024x768 , 24.png )

Alright. We got the mushrooms and head back. I don't know what she's moping about, it's not like I actually made her go in.

>>86368
Hug Nezu. Assure her you wouldn't put her in harm's way on purpose.

ghkk we should check the right passage real quick

Too late =\

Admire the dusk sky! Damn that's pretty.

>>86368
My that is a pretty sky.

Hug Nezu :(

Tura 2009/12/05(Sat)18:59 No. 86402 ID: b1e366
File 126006839930.png - (279.03KB , 1024x768 , 25.png )

It's going to be night before we get back anyway. Might as well enjoy it.

>>86402
>Might as well enjoy it.

If you know what I mean.

You bunch of dandy fops! we are missing valuable treasure!

>>86402
huggle nezu

Set up camp somewhere. Hug Nezu.

Kiss Nezu,

Start a tax-free college fund for Nezu using a 529 plan, making sure that you earn compound interest on the savings account.

>>86621

Then finger her in the vagina.

I... what...

Just um I dunno, talk to her. Tell her not to worry so much.

Suggestion 2009/12/06(Sun)02:27 No. 86682 ID: 2dd482
File 126009523054.jpg - (1.85KB , 98x123 , ceilingtau.jpg )

>>86668
then smear jelly on her

Comment how you didn't see many sunsets at home.

Tura 2009/12/06(Sun)11:05 No. 86755 ID: b1e366
File 126012633725.png - (273.38KB , 1024x768 , 26.png )

Meh... We'll head back tomorrow, I guess.
The grass is softer than that shop floor anyway.

>>86755
Nonononono. Don't!

>>86755
What, no tent? Just like that, a random patch of grass?

Lady, you're aksing for it.

>>86755
This is the life. Sleeping in the great outdoors, under the starry sky, just you and your mouseboob pillow.

Tura 2009/12/06(Sun)13:34 No. 86819 ID: b1e366
File 126013526547.png - (218.79KB , 1024x768 , 27.png )

We make it back in the morning with the mushro- HEY!

"You'll be the bizarre hybrid party leader and you'll be the adorable animal girl side kick."

>>86819
HEY!

>>86819
HEY!

>>86821
>>86820
LISTEN!

>>86820
>>86821
>>86822
SHUT UP NAVI! wait...

>>86819
So THAT'S what happened to ruby and Raital!

>>86819

"You can't replace us when we're not dead yet!"

>>86824
But if that was Ruby then who was Tom?

Tura 2009/12/06(Sun)13:46 No. 86828 ID: b1e366
File 126013598581.png - (132.29KB , 1024x768 , 28.png )

"OH GODS! YOU'RE ALIVE! I mean... Thank the Gods you're alive!"

>>86819
Loom behind the kobold. Making angry faces.

>>86828
We were only gone one night.

>>86828
Demand to know what she did.

Suggestion 2009/12/06(Sun)13:48 No. 86833 ID: 12fc66
File 126013609929.jpg - (23.78KB , 640x480 , fry_squint1.jpg )

Give him this face.

>>86828
Announce that you safely got the honey from the space bees- I mean, mushrooms from the cave. Look at your replacements, introduce yourself kindly, then ask them their names.

Whack the professor at least once for trying to replace you after a single day away.
Also, add new girls to party.

I think a Unicode Stare is in order.

Tura 2009/12/06(Sun)14:28 No. 86862 ID: b1e366
File 126013851484.png - (247.92KB , 1024x768 , 29.png )

"Come back in a week."

>>86862

"We got your stupid mushrooms."

>>86862
Yeah... so bout those shrooms you wanted?

"Good news, everybody! We've got the shrooms!"

>>86862
Mudy became an old, decrepit alchemist?

:c

Tura 2009/12/06(Sun)18:45 No. 87085 ID: b1e366
File 126015391148.png - (151.95KB , 1024x768 , 30.png )

I deliver the mushrooms and receive a generous payment that I think is totally fair.

Total Funds: 239 gold, 17 silver

go shopping for adventuring equipment.

To the market district.

>>87085
Shopping spree! Get something shiny.

The kobOLD has outlived his usefulness.

Find out what we can about Nezu's past, leads to your father, and then continue the ADVENTURE.

It's time we blew this joint! Go buy a trip across the river.

we need some reasonable adventuring clothes, like some armor and pants. It won't do to run around all over the place in a dress. See if we can get a giant hog and a cart for it to pull.

Go check how much a ticket is and when the ship is leaving.

See if the other two freaks will join you.

Tura 2009/12/12(Sat)14:16 No. 90610 ID: 4ce1b0
File 126065620773.png - (224.61KB , 1024x768 , 31.png )

>>87164
I'll get some light armor, nothing too heavy.
Hmm... This looked bigger on the rack.

>>90610
Too skimpy. You want something which is going to protect most of your vital areas.

And no, those flesh pillows do not provide any bonuses to your natural defense score.

>>90610
Or it makes your rack look bigger.
One of the two, anyway.

>>90610
Is that leather top comfortable? Your assets are looking a bit compressed there.

>>90610
theres no way you will fit you VOLUPTUOUS BREASTS into that tiny little ARMOR
maybe if you remove your top you could squeeze in, give it a try

>>90613
For serious. I've heard of pushup bras, but this is ridiculous.

>>90610
Remember this is a fantasy setting so you want sholder pads and armor that will leave your belly and bust exposed.

>>90610
I agree that it looks smaller on your rack.
I mean what?

>>90611
The only areas on a woman that you can damage are the nipples and crotch, that's all we need to cover up.

I like my women like I like my coffee,

COVERED IN STEEEEEEEEL

Suggestion 2009/12/12(Sat)15:53 No. 90656 ID: b9af96
File 126066198123.jpg - (93.20KB , 357x899 , tura armour.jpg )

Nah, we gotta get something protective. At least a happuri for the head if we don't want a helmet, that'll give at least some protection for our pretty face. We definitely want to invest in at least a leather gorget for our neck. That's an important part. A metal rigid breastplate, and some thick leather scale for our guts. It's not too heavy and doesn't clank. We want some spaulders for the shoulder/collarbone area, that's easily broken, maybe some elbow protection too. Some nice leather gauntlets would be good, the hands are also easy to injure. We want to protect our thigh area, that's a frequently attacked area as well, some tassets should work for that, metal preferably. We definitely want some nice boots, preferably with knee protection, if we don't wanna wear full greaves. Those can get expensive, though.

>>90656
A serious, reasonable suggestion? You don't know how this works, do you?

>>90656
My brain says this.

>>90633
My balls say this.

>>90656

It's kind of sexy. I like it

I don't think Tura has enough money for an entire suit of platemail! Plus, she's probably not strong enough to wear it.

If no better-fitting leather armor is available, just get a chain shirt.

>>90667
We could probably knock a good deal of the price off if we had one custom made with a more widely available metal.

Like copper or bronze.

>>90667
The only thing we really want to be made of steel is the breastplate. All the other stuff is interchangeable with leather if we can't afford steel.

Tura 2009/12/12(Sat)22:30 No. 90873 ID: 4ce1b0
File 126068582186.png - (177.39KB , 1024x768 , 32.png )

>>90667
Ah... Much better. That other stuff was totally impractical. It didn't cover anything.

>>90873
Nezu is rockin' that turtleneck.

Is that more comfortable than your mother's armor?

You should get matching outfits.

>Hug Nezu

So uh.

What were we doing again?

We were about to go to the docks and pay for a ride to the island so we can totally ruin Zepave's day.

>>90903
Finding dad and ruining his life for fucking mom and leaving her to raise a half-elf half-goblin freak child.
No offense, Tura.

>>90903
What aren't we doing? is a better question.
(looking for her father thats what)

Let's go to the docks and see if we can find a ride to that island.

Tura 2009/12/13(Sun)18:03 No. 91321 ID: 4ce1b0
File 126075618595.png - (203.06KB , 1024x768 , 33.png )

>find a ride to the island.

"Hey, how much for a ride to that island!?"

"More than likely more than you can afford. Why don't you try one of the human trading scows?"

>>91321
Now that's just racist.


Try it anyway. It's always good to have more money left over.

>>91321
Fucking hairdressers.

Hey Tura - is there any kind of magic that will purge that elven crap from your blood? I think you'd be better off.

In the meantime, go find some damn humans. Preferably ones with booze and a ship.

>>91321
Say "Fine." and shove her in the water before going to find some other boat.

>>91321
Well, if it's cheaper to go on a human boat...

Wait. Wait just a moment. Is he the only one guarding the boat? Is it also a small enough boat to be sailed with only two people?

>>91321
"I said, 'How much for a ride to the island?' - So are you going to tell me, or am I going to take my money elsewhere?"
Jingle your coin purse, which should hopefully have enough weighty money in it to make him carefully rethink his last statement.

>>91331
I was thinking about this but we might as well try going legitimate as long as possible.

That and she's wearing a white dress and, being an elf, presumably nothing underneath. And she'll probably have to walk home to change.

>>91333
This, and try to be a little flirty about it, this Island's going to be full of elves, may as well start learning to tolerate the bastards now ehh?

Is that even the right island?

Ask WHY it would be so expensive if the island is so close.

(perhaps there is a good reason, like water monsters, and fast elven ships can outrun them)

>>91407
I should add that if there are water monsters, the human ships would definitely be a LOT MORE FUN.

We do have our weapons ready, don't we?

Tura 2009/12/13(Sun)21:09 No. 91414 ID: 4ce1b0
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"How much was it again? I couldn't hear you over all my gold."

"FINE! If you cause any problems we'll throw you overboard."

Convince her of your elven blood and make up a flowery tragic tale to go with it. Elves love that stupid shit.

>>91415
That's actually a good idea.

>>91414
You and Nezu do give him sparkley eyes and promise you won't do anything. (with your fingers crossed of corse

>>91415
Also, include Zepave in there somehow. Then ask about his whereabouts.

Elves know other elves, right?

>>91418
we better play it straight on the boat

>>91450
Straight...elf...I lol'd

>>91414

Who are "we," if they are pussies take over the ship, if not... We can still try.

Tura 2009/12/16(Wed)18:57 No. 93113 ID: 4ce1b0
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>>91455
I... erp... I will... urk... get right on... that.

>>93113
How's Nezu doing? You know what they say about ship rats huh?

Anyhow, try and avoid vomiting too much and remember to drink plenty of water to avoid dehydration.

Suggestion 2009/12/16(Wed)19:00 No. 93115 ID: 34470e
File 126101880682.png - (94.33KB , 640x480 , THAT3.png )

>>93113
If you feel like your going to puke, just think of the trees. It's what I did when I was young.

Get to the middle of the ship and think of something else!

Don't think about it, think about anything else. Picture yourself on a train at the station, with plasticene porters, and looking-glass ties. Think of being somewhere else.

Think about sex. With Nezu.

>>93113
You're looking very... Green, there, Tura.

Tura 2009/12/16(Wed)19:50 No. 93147 ID: 4ce1b0
File 126102183858.png - (237.18KB , 1024x768 , 36.png )

>Move to the middle of the ship and think of something else.

I'm thinking about how my stomach feels like it's going to burst out of my mouth and rip my guts out in a huge barfsplosion.

"Excuse me, miss. Are you alright? You look very green."

Oh gods. Can't talk. Gonna puke.

>>93147
Woman, you need to get yourself some sea-legs.

>>93147
Mention that as a sludge elf you are unused to the water moving about so.

Think about something other that puking, maybe try to pick out some good physical traits in elven males? You mother must have done one for some reason, ehh?

>>93147
Alright, get back to the side if you must.
But try thinking back to that time with Musor and Nako, to get your mind off your uneasiness.

>>93147
Tura, place the tip of your thumb in the middle of your palm. Then clench a fist over the thumb. Then say goodbye to your gag reflex.

>>93147
Do this >>93150
and then ask about Zepave.


Continue to think about lesbian sex with Nezu.

>>93147
Sit down next to the side that is away from the wind. Keep your eyes on the horizon, that won't be swaying a bit. You'll have to try and eat something, dry rye bread or onion soup is good. I know you don't want to but you'll die if you puke for days without eating.

>>93147
dont puke in a more HARDBOILED MANNER

Tell him you are feeling very out of sorts and are staying abovedecks to spare them an unladylike display.

Throw up over the side, just let it all out. At least then you'll be able to talk without barfing on anybody, because your stomach will be empty.

I suggest NOT barfing on the elf. If you do, accuse the DM of railroading.

Barf over the side.

Tura 2009/12/17(Thu)04:08 No. 93305 ID: 4ce1b0
File 12610517231.png - (232.57KB , 1024x768 , 37.png )

>>93150
"I'm fine. I'm just used to being on solid ground."

As for good traits, what could be good about an elf? Just because he's really tall with sparkling eyes and chiseled features...

>>93151
Hehe... Now there's a rocking motion I don't mind. I wonder if it's as big as the res- SHUT UP! I don't want a gross elf!

"Well, if you need anything, just ask."

>>93305
"Aaaaanything?"

Well its nice that he's looking past his preconceptions of green people.

>>93305
Aaaanyth-uRUHRHGLDGHSLGH

All over his shoes.

Come on, go for it!

Resist the urge to vomit on elf! Instead, ask him to tell you a story to keep your mind busy. Or get him to take his shirt off so you can keep your mind busy that way.

Ask him about the island already, and if he ever met an elf by the name of Zepave

>>93305
I wasn't implying anything of the sort.
I'd rather you find a nice gobbo guy, or perhaps some less... pansy male humanoid who's into other races like that.
Maybe you could find a nice human guy?

...Anyway, that was strictly to get your mind of horking all over the boat. And, sparkling eyes? Ew. You know what elves do, Tura? They fuck trees. Trees. This elf is probably only on this boat because it used to be a tree he fucked and he couldn't bear to be separated from it.

Your mom may have gotten lucky with Zepave, but that doesn't mean the rest of the elves are even that decent. And he was something of a wimp, too. Single blow to the chest and he was out like a light. Disgraceful.

>>93305

Ask for him to bring you some water and soda crackers to settle your stomach.

>>93305
...and whats so gross about elves ehh? You are half elf? In fact you pass rather well for some kind of unusual elf subspecies. Does that mean you are half disgusting? I rather think not.

Admit it, you 'are' more alike that you are different, and it's an unpleasant rocking motion anymore now is it? Embrace that feeling.

>>93310
inb4 that's his father.

ask him if he knows Zepave while admiring his strong, lithe body.

Don't tell me you just paid all your money just to screw with an elf.

He seems less of a dick than anticipated though.

>>93350
Indeed, this strange absence of dickishness should be explored and scientifically examined.