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File 145311597584.png - (147.99KB , 500x500 , i0.png )
694973 No. 694973 ID: defceb

The following quest is a work of fiction.
38 posts omitted. Last 100 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 698652 ID: ccec28

>>698649
Quick! Pretend it's a prank and have your ass ravaged!
>>
No. 698653 ID: 5ad4a7

>>698649
1. But also try to flirt. Unsuccessfully.
>>
No. 698654 ID: 739723

1.

THEY'RE SHIPPING THEM! AND THEN THEY'RE GOING TO SHIP US!! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOODno offense intended i know you're a man of god and all
>>
No. 698655 ID: 15a025

Two.
>>
No. 698657 ID: 02422f

1212121212
>>
No. 698684 ID: 99a64d

1. But also try to flirt. Successfully.

But Illuminati-kun, you ARE the lizardmen.
>>
No. 698700 ID: f6442a

Push the big red button that invites the lizardmen over to watch the world burn in nuclear hellfire.
>>
No. 698722 ID: 427410

Lizardmen? You didn't tell me there could be Lizardmen. [2] We need everyone on this. Think, if the tgchanners can find you they could find all the conspiracies. Don't call the alien overlords though, those guys are a pain in the ass.
>>
No. 698724 ID: defceb
File 145444714116.png - (71.58KB , 535x363 , i4.png )
698724

“It’s the tgchan suggestors! They’re shipping! If we don’t act soon they’ll ship US!!!”

“Did sssssomeone sssay ssshipping?”

WHY ARE THE LIZARDMEN HERE!?

[1] Invite the evil space overlords and make a party.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________
>>
No. 698725 ID: 5ad4a7

>>698724
4. smoochie templar-sama
>>
No. 698727 ID: 02422f

>>698725
Yes, exhibitionism in front of the lizardmen! Exhibitionism is the deepest taboo for secret people like yourselves.
>>
No. 698729 ID: 427410

[4] Realize the alien overlords are already here, they always are, and tell them to get out. This is a meeting for respectable conspiracies.
>>
No. 698730 ID: eb3002

The time has come, Illuminati.
You've been preparing for this day, haven't you.
No, not the red button for project XK.
Time to unveil Project XXXK. Time to become the true ruler of the id, ego, and superego of the world. For there is only one thing with more stamina than control, more influence than power, and that needs neither secrecy nor shame!
It is time to bring unity.
It is time to begin your quest, to become,
The Illuminaughty.
>>
No. 698731 ID: 99a64d

jesus christ just kiss the boy!
>>
No. 698744 ID: a22f87

test
>>
No. 698809 ID: f6442a

Ssseduce sssnek.
>>
No. 698813 ID: 15a025

Let's have a sexy ass tea party here.
>>
No. 698874 ID: f0e552

>>698724
there's a snake!? What the fuck? What's next? Is Elvis gonna come out of hiding with the AYYliens and join this party too? At this rate all of our conspiracies will go down the gutter!
>>
No. 698876 ID: defceb
File 145457202718.png - (186.51KB , 923x556 , i5.png )
698876

“You heard them Illuminaughty it’s smooching time!” I’m promptly tackled by Knights Templar-senpai. “It’ll be just like the fanfiction!”

Ahhh! Right in front of the lizardmen!? And now the alien overlords are watching too! I’m not into exhibitionism well okay maybe a little This is far too much for one conspiracy to handle! It’s almost like…

...almost…

...like…

...ONE OF THOSE QUESTS. OH NO. THE SUGGESTORS MUST ALREADY BE HERE. IT’S TOO LATE!!!

[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] _________
>>
No. 698879 ID: 7f917c

4: Booze, booze everywhere.
>>
No. 698880 ID: f0e552

>>698876
4) no.
4) you may not.
4) you may think we are just suggesters BUT
4) you are truly under control by us
4) we know you've been thinking about nuclear hellfire
4) but I say
4) REVEAL YOURSELF TO THE WORLD
>>
No. 698881 ID: 5ad4a7

>>698876
4. Is smoochies really such a bad thing I mean come on. If you want to chase off the lookie-loos then go ahead, but you should follow your heart.
>>
No. 698882 ID: 73c49c

4. Have Love grant you free will, then have a 3-som with lizard and crusader lad
>>
No. 698896 ID: f2461f

The button isn't what you think it is, pushing it doesn't end the world in hellfire. Pushing the button isn't the answer anymore and your reliance on it speaks only of your weakness. Trust us, it's in your best interest.
>>
No. 698901 ID: 427410

[4] Smile for the lizard man's camera.
>>
No. 698904 ID: acd0d2

4. Tell CERN to do the THING.
>>
No. 698907 ID: 3641d4

Princess tea party time bitches.
>>
No. 698916 ID: 7f917c

>>698876
4: Gain another vertice and become square, nobody will expect the ilerminerty to be square!
And since square = hip, make sure you get into some stretchy pants.
>>
No. 698921 ID: bb6515

It's too late. There is no way out. Bow to the will of the almighty suggesters.

4. Surrender to the smooches.
>>
No. 698923 ID: 2a7417

Push ALL the big red buttons!
>>
No. 698935 ID: dbb0f9

4)smooch then nuclear hellfire
>>
No. 698951 ID: d283ef

I ship options 1 and 3.
>>
No. 698993 ID: f4ce51

4) Pomf =3 KnightsTemplar-senpai into the Big Red Button
>>
No. 699058 ID: 15a025

4. Ship Illuminaughty-Kun with Apollo-sama!
>>
No. 699166 ID: a107fd

Reverse the polarity of your panopticon, giving everyone in the civilized world a free show. You know you want to.
>>
No. 699180 ID: acd0d2

4. Push the SHINY RED BUTTON while listening to "Ode to Joy".
>>
No. 699282 ID: defceb
File 145470861544.png - (190.86KB , 536x460 , i6.png )
699282

No smooches!

“Knights Templar-senpai demands smooches!”

“Senpai, no that’s the suggestors talking! They’re already influencing us! Can’t you see we’re becoming DANGEROUSLY ATTRACTIVE!?”

“Let’s reveal this to the world!”

“Not you too, Lizardmen!”

IT’S TOO LATE. THE OTHER CONSPIRACIES CAN’T HANDLE THIS KIND OF SHIPPING.

BUT YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!

[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[2] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[3] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
[4] Push the big red button, ending the world in sexy hellfire.
>>
No. 699286 ID: 15a025

Push the sexy red button and save yourself and the world from this. Alternatively, embrace things and throw an awesome princess tea party to celebrate.
>>
No. 699301 ID: 5ad4a7

>>699282
Okay, no smooches.
>>
No. 699314 ID: f6442a

5) Ship the lizardmen with the button.
>>
No. 699315 ID: f0e552

>>699282
you leave us no option... but to do nothing, ha! you can't stop us from doing nothing! But this will all be for naught if someone else tries to press the button...
>>
No. 699332 ID: bb6515

>>699301
I WILL TAKE THE WHOLE WORLD WITH ME BEFORE I SEE THESE SMOOCHES END

4 if it comes to that

~i say fiiiire~
>>
No. 699336 ID: 99a64d

[5]tiem for sexy exhibitionism and shipping!
>>
No. 699355 ID: 796324

[4] If we're going to end the world in hellfire it might as well be sexy hellfire.
>>
No. 699366 ID: 5ad4a7

>>699332
YOU FOOL! IF THE WORLD ENDS, SO DO THE SMOOCHES!

ALL THE SMOOCHES!
>>
No. 699371 ID: 02422f

>>699282
[◬] Push Knight Templar-san's buttons.
>>
No. 699453 ID: 7f917c

[63] Apply rule 63.
>>
No. 699459 ID: ff0953

>>699282
seduce the red button and engage in sexy hellfire exhibitionism and shipping!
>>
No. 699470 ID: 327871

>>699282
[x] Push the big grey button resetting the universe to the status of three days ago.
>>
No. 699529 ID: 07e152

>>699371
>>
No. 699735 ID: 8f693e

4) Lets have a tree way... on top of the button!
>>
No. 699970 ID: defceb
File 145490523391.png - (240.50KB , 864x624 , i7.png )
699970

>[63] Apply rule 63

>Push the sexy red button and save yourself and the world from this
>5) Ship the lizardmen with the button.
>4 if it comes to that
>~i say fiiiire~
>[4] If we're going to end the world in hellfire it might as well be sexy hellfire.
>[◬] Push Knight Templar-san's buttons.
>seduce the red button and engage in sexy hellfire exhibitionism and shipping!
>[x] Push the big grey button resetting the universe to the status of three days ago.
>4) Lets have a tree way... on top of the button!

THAT’S IT I’M PUSHING THE BUTTON!

GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!
>>
No. 699971 ID: defceb
File 145490526157.png - (94.62KB , 792x601 , i8.png )
699971

“Yeah, push me! Push me hard~”
>>
No. 699972 ID: defceb
File 145490527148.png - (69.61KB , 380x434 , i9.png )
699972

>>
No. 699973 ID: 796324

Push it, we the suggesters of tgchan command it!
>>
No. 699974 ID: 5ad4a7

>>699972
It says do not push.
Pushing it would be... naughty. Forbidden. Kinky.

Face it, you've lost. All that's left is terms of surrender. What do you want, truly? What is your desire? We can grant it. Even if it means giving you a place in this new world where you can be without lewd.

It'd be disgusting, really, but if that's what you want...
>>
No. 699975 ID: 48e5d9

Don't do it! The suggesters are tellin you to! It's a TG Chan trap!
>>
No. 699977 ID: 5ad4a7

...don't make us use the nuclear option.
Button-tan.
>>
No. 699983 ID: f0e552

>>699972
oh no... The button from the don't press the button quest! You lived!?

1) do whatever the button says, including push it, if that is what it so desires.
>>
No. 699984 ID: 534caf

>>699972
Yes. PUsh that button~
>>
No. 699985 ID: 02422f

>>699970
Haha, wow, did not expect rule 63 to go through.

>>699971
You can't push the button now. That's what those no good suggestors did with the button before!
>>
No. 699988 ID: defceb
File 145491021590.png - (105.73KB , 878x494 , i10.png )
699988

>oh no... The button from the don't press the button quest! You lived!?

“Yes! It’s me! I’ve thought of nothing but you lot since the day that quest ended. I love you, random tgchan suggestors, I love you more than I can bear! I… I…!!!”
>>
No. 699989 ID: defceb
File 145491022959.png - (80.50KB , 878x494 , i11.png )
699989

“I want you to push me again! Damn the consequences, this is love!”
>>
No. 699990 ID: defceb
File 145491024003.png - (72.66KB , 878x494 , i12.png )
699990

“True love! Now push me!!”
>>
No. 699991 ID: 02422f

>>699990
Stick your dick in it.
>>
No. 699992 ID: 534caf

>>699990
If we disconnect you from the electronics, we can push you as much as you want instead of once.

HUNDREDS OF TIMES. JUST IMAGINE.
>>
No. 699994 ID: 5ad4a7

>>699992
IMAGINE
>>
No. 699997 ID: 5ad4a7

Wait can we even push button? We don't have a body this time.
>>
No. 699998 ID: 641587

WAIT! The button from "Do Not Press" was on a basement! there should not be any windows here! That button is an impostor!
>>
No. 700019 ID: 7f917c

Tell the button to go push itself.
>>
No. 700020 ID: 99a64d

>>699998
maybe it was moved?

caress the buton
>>
No. 700022 ID: 796324

Forget the button we absolutely must not allow Illuminaughty-chan to get away. We must lead Knights Templar-sempai on a hilarious Scooby Doo chase after her.
>>
No. 700027 ID: 3641d4

Run, we must go into hiding.
>>
No. 700145 ID: 15a025

Illuminati-kun, you must dash into the tombs of Egypt and go into hiding there.
>>
No. 700152 ID: 3d2d5f

>>700145
Illuminati-chan, now.
>>
No. 700335 ID: f6442a

Flip the switch that ends the world in nuclear hellfire.
>>
No. 700346 ID: 99a64d

>>700335
noooo!
>>
No. 700388 ID: bb6515

>>699990
were you plotting to escape when we were distracted, il-lu-mi-na-ti-chan? haven't you figured it out by now?

we can find all your secret plots.

you can't hi~ide
>>
No. 700399 ID: defceb
File 145500785781.png - (43.35KB , 497x483 , i13.png )
700399

>WAIT! The button from "Do Not Press" was on a basement! there should not be any windows here! That button is an impostor!
“W-what!? I-I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

>Forget the button we absolutely must not allow Illuminaughty-chan to get away. We must lead Knights Templar-sempai on a hilarious Scooby Doo chase after her.
“No don’t leave! Come back! COME BAAAAAAACK!”
>>
No. 700400 ID: defceb
File 145500789425.png - (36.90KB , 668x407 , i14.png )
700400

“It’s too late, suggestors! I’m already sailing off into the sunset! Next the credits will start rolling and I’ll be free! Free to plot again! The illuminati always win in the end! HA! hhahahahHAHAHAHAHAHA! MWAhgAHAAHAGSHGASDHAHAHAHA!!!!"
>>
No. 700401 ID: 5ad4a7

>>700400
Ok, bye. I guess we'll get back to shipping people and revealing your plots.

AND THE FUTURE REFUSED TO CHANGE.
>>
No. 700402 ID: 534caf

>>700400
but

...you left Templar-senpai behind...
>>
No. 700405 ID: f0e552

>>700400
hey. get back here.
[1] Push the big red button, ending the world in nuclear hellfire.
>>
No. 700411 ID: 99a64d

that's what you think! we own a speed boat!
>>
No. 700414 ID: b19397

You coward, You FOOL!
You can try to run, but you willnever be able to HIDE!
We will find you. We will get you!

WE!WILL!SHIP!YOU! THERE WILL NEVER BE PEACE!!
>>
No. 700423 ID: 3641d4

Wait, what's stopping us suggestors from pushing the button? Hey everyone let's go push the living shit out of that sexy red button.
>>
No. 700427 ID: a3d849

No Illuminati-chan!! Not the ocean that's where the dolphins can get you. Why does no one realize how evil the dolphin conspiracy is?
>>
No. 700431 ID: 3d2d5f

>>700400
What do you mean. We got plots and antics and rule 63. How is this not a win for us.
>>
No. 700466 ID: 7f917c

>>700400
But Nati-chan, we were inside you this whole time. You can't escape us.
>>
No. 700472 ID: b6178d

>>700400

But Illuminati, my dear, after the credits... comes the stinger.
>>
No. 700514 ID: 6d327c

wait.. are you literally in a ship right now, Illuminaughty-chan? That was the method you chose to escape? Riding your ship into the sunset?

I think our work here is done, guys.
>>
No. 700516 ID: 6ea609

>>700400
>>700427
Goodbye, and thanks for the fish
>>
No. 700718 ID: bb6515

Push the big red sunset, ending the quest in nuclear credits.
>>
No. 700871 ID: fa18d4

So, you're shipping yourself.
>>
No. 700912 ID: defceb
File 145515838725.png - (38.16KB , 668x407 , i15.png )
700912

>>700718
>>
No. 700913 ID: defceb
File 145515839471.png - (91.14KB , 668x407 , i16.png )
700913

>>
No. 700914 ID: defceb
File 145515840052.png - (36.56KB , 668x407 , i17.png )
700914

>>
No. 700915 ID: f56624

>>700914
rip illuminati, never got laid
>>
No. 701014 ID: ff0953

>>700914
but who pushed the sunset???

to be continued
>>
No. 701042 ID: 99a64d

>>701014
it was bb6515
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