tits.

Balls, his jacket is cooler.

tits

Balls.

Both
Exclusivity is for SUCKERS

girl

Fusion dance! Both!

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)12:35 No. 432949 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238094418.png - (48.95KB , 966x716 , ML.png )

Her initials are M.L.

She is a:
>A. Treasure Hunter
>B. Explorer
>C. Rock Climber

Call me a Treasure Hunter, or I'll rip your lungs out.

I see no reason she can't be all three.

>>432953

Changed my mind, seconding this, if possible. We will explore the rock faces we climb, searching for hidden treasure.

treasure!!

climbing, yo.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)12:55 No. 432961 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238213804.png - (44.08KB , 997x726 , CL.png )

>>432952
>>432953
>>432954
>>432955
>>432956
She doesn't see why she can't be all three either.

She ascends one of the largest mountains in the area for the rumoured Necklace of Gold (shortened to NoG) that is said to be at the top. None have ever managed to reach the summit, as there are many tricky and dangerous obstacles that keep most explorers at bay. A keen mind for puzzles, a creative thought process for riddles, and intense metagame knowledge is required.

None of which M.L. actually has, but she's pretty apathetic about the details. She got some info from the village at the base of the mountain. None were very talkative, but one child had given M.L. a very interesting piece of advice.

>What the little boy told M.L. was...:

"Gotta go fast."

>>432962

Seconding.

>>432961

"Food becomes poo!"

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)13:22 No. 432973 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238376093.png - (71.66KB , 988x715 , GF.png )

>>432963
>>432962
M.L. leaned in close as the boy cupped his hand around his mouth. Quietly, he whispered:

"Gotta go fast."

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)13:23 No. 432975 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238380856.png - (44.27KB , 994x722 , FO.png )

M.L. didn't take it very seriously.

We'll just see how that turns out when you don't go fast enough!

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)13:28 No. 432979 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238410681.png - (63.65KB , 1000x726 , GD.png )

But M.L. has no reason to think about that anymore. As she continues up the slope, she comes to a door leading into the mountain. There's a woman in a clean, white dress tied by her wrists and ankles to the door, blocking the entrance. The woman appears to be asleep...

Wake her, cautiously. Be wary, as she might be a monster or trap or something guarding the treasure, and not just a person in need of help.

Grope her until she wakes up.

Yell at her until she wakes up.

>>432989
this, better not go too close

>>432989
>>432985

Yell at her while groping her until she wakes up.

>>432981
Lets hope she's a trap. Then they could have a cute almost-lesbian romance.

Give her a hug; that can't possibly go wrong.

>they could have a cute almost-lesbian romance

With bondage. A cute almost-lesbian romance with bondage. She is in chains. =D

She's a bomb, and now you have to run away.

Because you ignored the boy, you will fail to go fast enough.

Because you are a protagonist, you will survive, but all your clothes will be destroyed.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:02 No. 433006 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238616616.png - (52.79KB , 1001x695 , WU.png )

>>432981
>>432989
>>432990
M.L. shouts at the woman, telling her to wake up. There's something strange about the woman, so M.L. makes a point of not getting too close.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:04 No. 433009 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238625979.png - (58.92KB , 992x723 , P1.png )

The woman wakes as if on cue, wailing like a banshee.

"Oh, woe is me!" she shouts. "Fie on these ropes, that have bound me here for so long! Were I you, standing before me, free as a bird!"

M.L. covers her ears, the woman's yelling getting on her nerves. She thinks about throwing a rock at the woman's head so she'd fall back asleep.

"Or perhaps you are not as free as you think!" the woman continues. "As these ropes bind my wrists and as these ropes bind my ankles, your laces bind your shoes and your zippers bind your bag. What hope do I have of being untied and freed if mankind must tie down and secure even the smallest of things!"

Her commentary on the habits of mankind is lost on M.L., who is still covering her ears. The woman is a little embarrassed and decides to cut to the chase.

"Answer this question wisely! What brings you before me?"

>>433009
Lust for money and power. C'mon Calradia Quest

Dude, she sounded like she was trying to talk you into getting naked there for a moment. Or at least, taking off your shoes and backpack.

>>433009

Treasure hunting, exploring, and rock climbing.

That or your crazy headvoices.

Wishing to enjoy the sight of a beautiful lady you strongly suspect is voluntarily chained up.

>>433013
Seconded

>>433013

Thirded.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:34 No. 433024 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238806599.png - (59.12KB , 976x724 , HM.png )

>>433010
>>433011
M.L. tells her that she's climbing the mountain for the Necklace of Gold at the top, and that she likes exploring and whatnot. She's tempted to start flirting with her and suggest reasons that the woman is tied up, but wants to get this over with quickly.

The woman tilts her head back and looks around. "Treasure hunting? Ok, that means..." Her voice trails off. "Wait, no, I remember now."

She clears her throat and closes her eyes again. M.L. gets ready to cover her ears.

"Put not your hands upon your little ears
Unless thine plan is to go no further!
Never has someone reached the top before;
Considered a dangerous task, it is.
Hitherto, all came back empty handed!

Men have tried with swords to cut off these binds;
Empty hands are needed, and open minds."

She finishes with a strong nod of her head, looking proud.

"That was all in iambic pentameter," the woman says, "and the last two lines were a rhyming couplet. It's pretty impressive from a literary stand point, and I just came up with it on the spot." M.L. shrugs.

>>433024
Open minds eh? And earlier she was trying to get our clothes off... She's trying to get laid. Thank her, and ask her how to get the necklace. We haven't got all day to cater to her love of hanging around.

>Empty hands
>Open minds

She totally wants you to grope her.

Gotta say, she DOES seem to want to be groped. You may look like an idiot if you ask but... that does seem to be the obvious solution. Remember, ASK first, and apologize immediately about being unsure if you're misconstruing.

Give her a kiss

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:47 No. 433036 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238883166.png - (47.61KB , 990x707 , EH.png )

>>433033
>>433030
M.L. didn't realize she was on Brokeback Mountain. Get it? Cause this woman's obviously a lesbian. And Brokeback Mountain is a place for gays, she thinks. She's not sure, she's actually never seen the movie.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:47 No. 433037 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238887178.png - (66.16KB , 1000x726 , ST.png )

But she complies and gropes her anyway.

"What the fuck are you doing? Get your fuckin' man hands off me."

Dumbass, why didn't you ask? Now we're going to have to deal with a ton of stupid shit.

"or else what? you'll spit on me?"

Just apologize, remove your hand, ask what she means if not that, and ask if there is some way you can make up for your faux pas. Remember, treating gate guardians respectfully even if you fuck up will make them charitable.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)14:56 No. 433048 ID: 7b1b37
File 134238937901.png - (68.36KB , 984x722 , BM.png )

M.L. takes her hands off of the woman's chest. "This isn't Brokeback Mountain, ya dumb cunt."

M.L. apologizes and asks what the Hell she's supposed to do then. The woman's totally projecting her lesbianism and even her poem was about groping and shit.

"I already gave you the answer, Jesus Christ."

Wait... does she mean just... untie her...? Instead of forcing? But it looks like its chain and nailed in... maybe those nails can just be pulled out?

wiggle the things free.

Well, um, open your mind to her projected lesbianivity and try removing her bonds with your empty hands.

>>433048
"You just spoke that men can't cut your binds, and mentioned an open mind. What should I think but you want a woman's love?"
Untie all the binds you have, then try to untie hers.
"If you were free you could keep me from groping you. If I knew how to do that I'd rather free you than grope you. If you don't want to help me free you, then you clearly want to be a helpless subject of my desires~"

>>433055
No. This is not a rape train. This suggestion is creepy as hell.

OK, step one. Admit idioticy. Even if you're not an idiot. Step two, ask for her to rephrase the instructions. Step three if two fails, say you'll just squeeze your way around her or get a pickax to break the things holding chain to wall.

>>433056
I, unlike the others here, didn't say to DO anything to her.
Tricking her into telling us the answers is coercive, but not rape.

>>433058

you know, that's actually pretty clever. I vote we creep the answers out of her.

>>433061
Also?

No man can free her. She said we have man hands. Therefore we cannot free her with our hands.

Also, for amusement rather than seriousness, no man can free her, obviously we need a robot woman to break the chains.

Of course she never actually said no man can free her but...

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)16:27 No. 433103 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239485432.png - (49.79KB , 1001x726 , PL.png )

>>433050
>>433052
M.L. tugs on the nails to see if they'll come out. They're in there pretty snugly, M.L. doubts she'll ever be able to get them out without taking down the whole wall, and she doesn't have anything that could possibly do that.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)16:28 No. 433104 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239488478.png - (59.77KB , 998x731 , P2.png )

>>433056
>>433057
M.L. apologizes and tells the woman that she is too cryptic. Can she rephrase the instructions? Use a different poem, or rather no poem at all?

"The poem is imperative," the woman says flatly. "Hold on a second." She tilts her head back the same way she did before and then looks back to M.L.

"Perhaps I was a little misleading;
Underneath my words, there is no meaning--
Nothing, and yet something is still the same.
Cannot be seen, unless read on paper.
Half of this shit doesn't even make sense.

Maybe we should just change up the puzzle;
Everyone just always tries to grope me."

>>433104
PUNCH ME

Punch her in the tit.

Seriously? Punch Me? I don't know about that. Are you sure your not looking for a cheap thrill? I mean if your a masochist I suppose it'd be alright to punch you.

Give her a light tap with your fist. See if that works.

Ok... looks like probably punch me is what she's saying... but ask. Don't want a repeat of stupidity before doing it.

Grope her again. It is obvious she wants to be groped.

>>433109
Sure we do.

punch in her the face.

Give her a right fisting.

>>433113
>punch in her the face.
I realize this was a typo, but let's make grammatical sense of this for fun.

"Punch in" could refer to crushing or smashing her the face in.

Her "the face" could be taken as being emphatic, so... smash in her face.

You have now lost 30 seconds of your life and I never intend to refund it.

Slap her booty

>>433117
One hand punches her breast/face. Other hand slaps her ass.

Just to be *really* certain.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)16:43 No. 433120 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239582583.png - (73.48KB , 991x726 , OW.png )

>>433107
M.L. punches her in the tit. The woman looks agitated.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)16:43 No. 433122 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239583681.png - (39.69KB , 1003x731 , GT.png )

She disappears, leaving the door unprotected.

Your not one for talking once you've made up your midn to do something are you? Anyway proceed.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)16:58 No. 433130 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239673159.png - (22.12KB , 999x722 , IN.png )

M.L. enters the mountainside. It leads to a long corridor that slopes upward. It's very dark, but at least it's linear.

No where to go but up!

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:00 No. 433131 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239681359.png - (21.95KB , 1003x717 , UP.png )

She ascends the slope quickly, despite its steepness. It's hardly a challenge in comparison to climbing a vertical wall! She proceeds into the next room.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:02 No. 433133 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239693034.png - (54.67KB , 1001x725 , FG.png )

The next room is also a long, but bright, corridor. Along one side of the wall is a foggy glass window-- M.L. can't see anything but a silhouette on the other side.

Try to wipe the fog off the glass if from steam, if not possible, try to push face to it so maybe can make out more details.

>>433133
Moonwalk through the corridor, confuse obvious trap person from behind the glass.
(S)he's obviously not as fly as you so can't mimic your moves, and if she can she's a busta

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:34 No. 433158 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239885648.png - (61.23KB , 1001x727 , SL.png )

>>433139
M.L. wipes the fog from the glass. Whoever is on the other side seems to do the same thing.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:34 No. 433159 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239887252.png - (55.37KB , 953x712 , TR.png )

It's a man. He's got a long nose, a mullet and some sort of hooded shirt on. It's hard to tell with the fog, but M.L. is pretty sure the sleeves are ripped off.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:34 No. 433161 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239889844.png - (52.06KB , 988x725 , HP.png )

He looks happy to see her.

Wave and say hello. Ask who they are.

knock.

Test if he is mirroring your movements.

forget hm, someone else is down the hall, watch out.

>>433181
This, after you hold up a finger to indicate "wait a bit".

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:52 No. 433189 ID: 7b1b37
File 134239997001.png - (73.03KB , 967x721 , TJ.png )

>>433173
>>433163
M.L. asks what his name is, half to be polite and half to see if he's up to something. She has to shout for him to hear what she's saying.

He nods and writes something on the foggy glass.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)17:54 No. 433192 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240005851.png - (51.31KB , 1002x731 , DW.png )

M.L. looks down the hall. Someone is there, but she can't make out what they look like. They don't move a muscle, silently standing next to the door.

Probably the next test. And it probably involves cooperating with TJ. Proceed to them.

>>433192
Let's go check it out.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)18:14 No. 433210 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240128148.png - (53.72KB , 1000x723 , DG.png )

>>433185
>>433194
>>433196
M.L. gives the man a signal to wait here as she heads down the hall. He decides to follow along beside her.

As she gets closer, the person at the end of the hall comes into view. It looks like they're sleeping.

Its the same woman again isn't it?

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)18:19 No. 433216 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240155236.png - (45.50KB , 998x726 , SE.png )

>>433215
M.L. feels as though she's seen this person before!

Shout at the sleeping person to wake up. Express a desire they not hit you with more puzzle poem shit.

Poke them awake.

>>433216
It looks like that kid that told you you have to go fast.

GO FAST.

>>433223
I thought it was T.J.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)18:41 No. 433235 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240287539.png - (65.57KB , 981x714 , AL.png )

>>433217
>>433218
M.L. wakes the man up, trying to tell him to refrain from poetry.

The man wakes, as if on cue, wailing like a banshee.

"Oh, I am awoken!" he shouts, "from a slumber that was so far eternal; a slumber that may not have ended had not someone come by! Were I you, standing before me, awake!"

M.L. pinches her nose and tells him that he is awake.

"Or perhaps I am not awake! And neither are you!" the man continues. "How can we be so sure this entire life is not just a dream? Such a vivid dream, that seems to go on forever-- as long as we were alive! What would happen to that man, I wonder, the man who woke up from his dream world?"

His metaphysical examination is lost on M.L., who chose instead to cover her ears. The man is a little embarrassed, and decides to cut to the chase.

"Answer this question wisely! Why have you waken me up?"

For ADVENTURE. The treasure would be nice too.

i'm here to punch people that speak in riddles in the dick.

>>433238
kick* but yeah

>i'm here to punch people that speak in riddles in the dick
and collect treasure. And I appear to be all out of treasure at the moment, so...

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)19:00 No. 433245 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240405635.png - (61.31KB , 999x724 , SO.png )

>>433243
>>433240
>>433238
The man laughs!

"Ha! Well, I'm afraid you're all out of luck then, for I do not speak in riddles!" He clears his throat. "Come and be welcome; I am a rare tale-taller, with stories of wonder I wisely recall. I'll tell you of heroes that dwell in your history, for tales that are true are best of them all!"

He finishes with a strong nod of his head, looking proud.

"Not sure if you caught that, but those last two sentences rhymed. Pretty impressive, regardless of preparation." M.L. shrugs.

The man leans in close. "Would you like to hear a story?"

"...Do I have to?"

fine, tell us the story.

Be annoyed and warn him that rhyming sounds suspiciously suspiciously close to riddle territory.

Then let him tell his damn story if it's so important to him, sheesh. Hurry up, you've got things to do, places to get to, and fast, apparently.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)19:07 No. 433249 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240444235.png - (59.94KB , 1001x721 , RH.png )

>>433246
"Ha ha, yes! It was a rhetorical question, not sure if you caught that. It's pretty impressive." He leans back on the wall and folds his arms. "Here are your options:"

>A. The Story of Two People
>B. The Story of Winter
>C. The Story of Above

The Story of Above.

> D. All options.

The story of... this is a puzzle, isn't it! I warned you! *Kick*!

>>433255
This

>>433249
"How about I just blow you so I can just move on without wasting my time? I reckon violence isn't going to work so screw it, incentive is probably faster than listening to your story and I also reckon you wouldn't give up your post for mere dollars... so blowjob? I bet you'll bust a nut faster than you can tell any of those stories."

The Story of ALL of the Above.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)19:56 No. 433281 ID: 7b1b37
File 134240741805.png - (63.93KB , 999x729 , WY.png )

>>433272
"Get bent," he says, sternly.

>>433267
>>433255
M.L. can see right through this guy! No riddles allowed, bub!

He takes a defensive stance. "No riddles, honest! Maybe a puzzle, or something, but no riddles! I wouldn't even call it a puzzle, really. You just gotta listen to one of them, so please, take your pick."

> The Story of ALL of the Above.
Yes.

How were you on the other side of that glass, and down the hall asleep, both at the same time?

Just testin' if sex would ever work practically in a quest. Nope. Never.
Just go C, but tell him he should really apologize for the "Get Bent" insult first. Honestly, you try and do something nice for a dude and they insult you? As a vague puzzle spirit thing, who's probably been here for an eternity to solely guard a single path with absolutely nothing to do, you gotta figure his balls are bluer than a smurf.

Go with C, please.

>>433289
Nah, he can sense the lesbianism in M.L. and knows she might just bite his dick off both for him being a nuisance and for being a dude.

>>433284

We're the grouchy and impatient adventurer whose gotta go fast, and threatens puzzles for wasting her time. In what way is listening to all the stories in character?

We'll take c, we guess. The treasure is above, right?

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)21:11 No. 433311 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241187938.png - (84.64KB , 1000x704 , 00.png )

>>433250
>>433289
>>433290
>>433305
M.L. shrugs and picks The Story of Above. The man nods and tilts his head back in the same way the woman at the gate did, deep in thought.

"Alright, listen carefully; I'm only gonna tell it once!" M.L. nods. He clears his throat.

"There was once a man who came from above. He sat high above everyone else, looking down on them with great pity."

He continues his story. "'How could someone live so low?' he would ask himself from his perch..."

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)21:15 No. 433318 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241215991.png - (78.08KB , 999x714 , 06.png )

"...[/i]In the end, he was too far above them all for anyone to take notice of his cries. He began to realize that perhaps life so high up above was not paradise, after all.[/i]"

He finishes with a strong nod of his head, looking proud.

M.L. shrugs. She didn't really get it at all, what was the moral supposed to be? What was the point at all?

Okay, so now what? The chained lesbian at least made it clear I was supposed to answer a question after her bullshit poem. What do you want for your story? Applause? A review? Am I supposed to do some literary analysis?

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)21:21 No. 433322 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241246635.png - (62.54KB , 1017x731 , HD.png )

"How's that!" he says, finally. "Pretty impressive, am I right? Any questions?"

Ok...
Well at least it is nicer to listen to than nonsensical poems.

Sure, Why does your face change when you tell stories?

Sure, what's the point? I mean, in regards to this place.

>>433322
How did the man eat while separated from everyone like that?

It's like he was already dead.

How did he expect to buy her a dress when he was so far away from the dress shops?

His entire life was completely implausible. And it was hardly heaven, cut off from everything necessary and good in life, but able to see what he was missing at all times. More like torture.

Speaking of torture, are you done torturing me here? Can I move on or what?

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)22:00 No. 433349 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241481340.png - (53.88KB , 982x724 , HY.png )

>>433328
"Thank you!" he says. "My stories are definitely better than poems. And more impressive, I think."

>>433334
>>433340
>>433321
M.L. is even more stumped than last time! This one doesn't even lead to groping or anything sexual.

"You can't move on yet," he says. "That wouldn't be much of a test! I hope you paid attention, because the test begins now."

Right. Whatever. Get to the questions, already.

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)22:05 No. 433354 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241512178.png - (55.49KB , 997x721 , Q1.png )

"Question one!" he exclaims, pointing at M.L.

"The woman the man stared at-- the beautiful one he particularly liked! What was her name?"

>Christin
>Christine
>Christie

>dickhead deleted the images in your photographic memory.
Dick. You're lucky we're too lazy to dig around in our mental image cache...

Christin.

...Christine?

Suggestion 2012/07/15(Sun)22:21 No. 433360 ID: 7b1b37
File 134241607297.png - (73.88KB , 997x729 , Q2.png )

>>433354
"That's right!" he exclaims, almost before M.L. finishes. "Question two!"

"The man always watched a woman named Christin. He thought she was beautiful, except for her dress. What colour was her dress?"

>Gray
>Dark green
>Brown

Brown. At least the mud on it was.

Yeah, brown. Also, total dick move actually deleting previous posts.

>>433362
I thought it was kinda smart to do.

WEll, yeah, but it gets the whole annoyance of 'I totally didn't get all of them the first time' in there.

gotta keep on your toes with this author, i can see that now.

Yeah bro I was playin' games and hoping to catch up!
Early bird catches the worm, apparently.

>>433365
I gotta agree, it's a clever idea.

I'm slightly petulant that I didn't ever see the picture, but that's sort of my own fault for not paying attention, y'know xD

>>433377
The "that's right!" post includes one of the deleted images. If there's one question per page of the story, you'll get to see them all, even if you missed them originally.

My bigger concern is it's the middle of the night for me and there's no way I'm going to remember the details very long...

...aaand it's way too annoying to even try to cheat. Stupid firefox and it's privacy encrypted cache. :p

And I'm off to bed now, to completely forget the clues. Good luck guessing the last question(s), M.L. Punch 'em in the dick if he gives you any trouble.

Brown

Try punching him in the tit

Suggestion 2012/07/16(Mon)03:56 No. 433457 ID: 7b1b37
File 134243618994.png - (55.76KB , 966x716 , ED.png )

Well I said I had about 7 hours to make this quest and I ended up going into about 10 hours!! But alas, I can go no further, so I suppose this quest ends here, for now.

I wish I could have done more with what I experimented with, but I hope you enjoyed it regardless? I might pick it back up again in two weeks, or better yet start a new one entirely! Stay cool, tgchan.

>>433457

Hey, wait, before you go, who are you?

>>433423

Also, yeah, seconding this.

>>433457
Yeah, we had fun. Good tone and pace, and I at least enjoyed harassing the unorthodox puzzle people. And the facial expressions were silly and great.

>>433423
Thirding.

>>433457
Couldja re-up the deleted images and text? It kinda sucks to have them missing once the quest is over.

>>433461
My handle is 'Tortoise' on IRC

>>433504
I would if I could, but I am away from my computer right now! ETA is 2 weeks, I guess