Herbert 2010/10/10(Sun)16:51 No. 241704 ID: 6ab386
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>>241658
Yes, this.

??? 2010/10/10(Sun)17:22 No. 241739 ID: a09a03
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>>241700
NO! I HATE DOOBIES!

>>241653
>>241655
>>241676
>>241661
OF COURSE!

I am a TOZVRYXIEN (Tozol/Nevrean/Talyxian/Valcien) hybrid

People think I'm a girl.

But I'm not.

WHAT IS MY NAME?

>>241739
Titji!

ohmygod

Penji is good luck in some language. What is that language's word for bad luck?

>>241739
Gizzus a twirl.

>>241739
Your name is obviously Misjizdran, or 'jiz' for short.

Either that or Flare. :D

>>241739
YOU ARE FEMALE

IF YOU ARE NOT THEN THIS MUST BE CORRECTED

>>241739
Commander Shepard

>>241739
Penzi. People who are trying to say the word "penji", a word meaning "good luck" in another language, often fuck up their words and say "Penzi" which is confusing to you because that is your name and not "good luck".

Penzi Shepard Badran.

YOU HAVE BEEN NAMED AFTER TWO OF THE MOST BAD-ASS PEOPLE EVER TO GRACE THE ANNALS OF HUMAN HISTORY.

JAMES TIBERIUS NUKEM.

Suggestion 2010/10/10(Sun)17:41 No. 241772 ID: f4963f
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>>241752
>mfw your sexuality is challenged by his radiant beauty.

??? 2010/10/10(Sun)18:09 No. 241791 ID: a09a03
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>>241767
>>241743
>>241756
>>241750
I am the deadly and charming COMMANDER JAMES MISJIZDRAN MISFORTUNE 67c611

MIGHTY PIRATE.

>>241752
NO

Okay I finished killing goblins. They weren't worth a lot of XP. Now Im back on the surface.

Show us your inverted cloaca

>>241791
FIND STRELOK; KILL STRELOK

>>241791
Cool. Go turn in the heads for the reward at town. Then get some ale and ... well whatever companionship you feel like getting.

>>241791
Find a Sergal and establish dominance.

You are one ugly motherfucker.

Pretend you are a girl and go pick up guys.

>>241793
Did you get the flash drive on the Goblin's body? Trader won't give you shit without it. Then we can head north to Agroprom to his hideout

>>241791
Attempt to locate two male sergals in a totally-not-homoerotic dom/sub relationship. Seduce the cute one; murder the shit out of the other one.

Or just find something badass and peep at it till it attempts to squish you.

>>241791
Masturbate profusely.

Cmdr James Misjizdran Misfortune 2010/10/10(Sun)18:33 No. 241821 ID: a09a03
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>>241793
>>241798
OK. IM HERE IN STALKER: SHADOW OF CHERNOBYL NOW

IT SUCKS. EVERYTHINGS UGLY EXCEPT ME.

>>241808
NO IM COLD

>>241797
FUCK YOU YOURE NOT MY REAL DAD

>>241821

Give an impassioned speech to your troops.

>>241821
use your gay bird powers to bring color and happiness to the zone!

Kill self, end thread.

Careful about the bloodsuckers. get to barkeep he'll give you a better suit

>>241821
KILL EVERYTHING UGLY

by peeping

If everything ugly except for you, make everything beautiful like yourself. Kind of like what that other guy said.

>>241821
CAN I CALL YOU BIG BIRD :D

>>241821
Use Valcien powers to make yourself warmer.

Clearly you must bring LIGHT and WARMTH to this dreary land with your RADIANT BEAUTY

>>241821

feed off the chernobyl power to fuel your spaceship form then go fight SPACE BIKERS then they will let you into their space biker bars so you can punch perps for information and also they will let you into their orgies

>>241830
Yes indeedy.

Cmdr James Misjizdran Misfortune 2010/10/10(Sun)19:01 No. 241843 ID: a09a03
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>>241837
>>241830
>>241826
I DO THIS

THAT MIND FLAYER DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FUCK

>>241829
NO SHUT UP YOU ARE THE WORST MAGIC ORB OF INFINITE PSYCHE EARRING EVER

BE SMARTER OR ILL USE THE ORB OF INFINITE PSYCHE SCEPTER INSTEAD

Suggestion 2010/10/10(Sun)19:02 No. 241845 ID: cd44d9
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>>241843

>>241843
Now turn into a spaceship and steal the Moon.

Win the world and be the king.

:(

>>241843

You have told us your NAME

Now, what is your QUEST?

>>241847
Eat Moon

Become Death Star

The wishgiver will give you all these things fly to the Chernobyl NPP. Surly TOZVRYXIEN can fly

>>241856
but what about the brain fryer?

>>241857
We are immune by virtue of not being human.

Cmdr James Misjizdran Misfortune 2010/10/10(Sun)19:36 No. 241873 ID: a09a03
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>>241856
I DONT KNOW WHICH WAY IS THERE BUT I TAKE OFF ANYWAY

>>241851
MAN I COULDN'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT SPECIES I WAS A FEW MINUTES AGO. HOW AM I GOING TO REMEMBER THAT.

WHAT DO I EVEN WEAR YOU FOR IF YOU CANT HELP ME THINK OF WHAT TO DO?

>>241848
BUT IF I BECOME KING EVERYONE WILL KNOW I'M NOT REALLY A GIRL~!

>>241873
It's the big awesome building kinda in the middle of this huge shithole called "The Zone". It radiates a total awesome-field which you should be able to detect with your poofy tail-thingies.

Also, please be careful when flying. You don't want to accidentally hit any ROBOT UNICORNS and get that silly song STUCK IN YOUR HEAD.

And the whole hiding your masculinity thing probably went out the window when you got drunk that one time and cockslapped a doobie to death. :C

>>241873

OK your quest is to BECOME THE MANLIEST KINGKLIEST KING

Listen close young man (who is actually 9001 years old) the things you need to be a TRUE KING are
1) a castle (as phallic as possible)
2) a sword (ditto)
3) a queen (like a king's wife not a flamboyant male crossdresser)
4) some knights
5) a kingdom, preferably forged in WAR

Find all these things and you will be THE KING, though you could also pull a sword from a stone or have a stone moan when you put your foot on it or find one piece

I think you should do them all!

Cmdr James Misjizdran Misfortune 2010/10/10(Sun)20:24 No. 241910 ID: a09a03
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>BECOME THE MANLIEST KING

Cmdr James Misjizdran Misfortune 2010/10/10(Sun)20:25 No. 241911 ID: a09a03
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OK THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT FOR MY FIRST SESSION

I'LL KEEP YOUR RESUME ON FILE

>>241910

HOPY SHIT

>>241791
My dick is so confused right now...

>>241957
You can always just hope that he's inherited the bird-anatomy trait of just having a cloaca and no wang. ;D

And honestly, when he's that hot, what does it really matter? :C