Xom stop Xomming

Xom stop Xomming

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)18:21 No. 22216 ID: f2de2f
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JUST KIDDING!

Xom stop Xomming

Grow breasts now.

Oh ho! How amusing. Good show sir.
>>22218 Second.

Put on some damn pants already.

You're fapping with that other hand, aren't you?

Fly around like an aeroplane, Xom. Make motorboat noises with your lips while you do so.

You should do something with... Tentacles next.

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)20:04 No. 22353 ID: f2de2f
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>>22296
>>22329
Hey! Do I tell you how to do your job? Noooo... Chaos is about subtlety, artistry and dumping 10,000 rocks on some poor chump's head for no reason!

>>22353
Teach us oh wise Xomite master.

>>22353

You remind me of a guy that I met once; something starting with a t.

>Eggplant.png

SUDDENLY EGGPLANT WIZARDS

MILLIONS OF THEM

Suggestion 2009/08/03(Mon)20:12 No. 22367 ID: bd2eec
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>>22353
NAY, XOM!
LOOK TO THE SKY!
TIS A BIRD NOR PLANE!

Q 2009/08/03(Mon)20:13 No. 22368 ID: bd2eec
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NAW, IT'S Q, MOTHERFUCKER.
AND I'M BRINGING THE PAIN!

What is this? I dont even...

XOM! TAKE NO SHIT! PUNCH HIS LIGHTS OUT!

...wat

Q 2009/08/03(Mon)20:15 No. 22372 ID: bd2eec
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...Bedamned, you got a strong jaw, Xom.
Oop!
Caught it.

KNOCK HIS BLOCK OFF XOM!

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)20:16 No. 22374 ID: f2de2f
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>>22357
Tomato, tomatoe, potato, potatoe. The art direction is going downhill kiddies! But at least I completely forgot what we were just talking about.

>>22374

I wasn't talking about a sentient vegetable; of course, it's hard to get the point across to you.

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)20:22 No. 22380 ID: f2de2f
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>>22372
I AM NOT AMUSED AT ALL! Gimme back my toy!

Give him back the orb dude. Then take no shit! Get punched in the FACE!

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)20:33 No. 22389 ID: f2de2f
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Touch~ <3

>>22389

Uh-oh.

>>22389
I'd tell you to run, but it wouldn't do any good...

Suggestion 2009/08/03(Mon)20:45 No. 22412 ID: bd2eec
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>>22380
Oops, sorry, taken aback by...
Is that your dick?

Suggestion 2009/08/03(Mon)20:46 No. 22414 ID: bd2eec
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>>22389
WHOA WHOA
WHAT THE
WHOA

This quest confuses, scares, and arouses me.

oh shit dude. Watch out. That things totally going to punch you.
Whats this quest called? Chaosquest? Xomquest?

>>22412
I don't really want to see what Xom's cockslap does after seeing what the touch does.
>>22414
You should get a tiny hand crossbow and shoot people with your face.

Reaver!mE1ODcDVTM 2009/08/03(Mon)20:50 No. 22423 ID: fb5d8e
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YO GET YO FILTHY PAWS OF MY HOMEBOY, TEABAG

>>22423

Xom got hit in the face!

Twice!

Something like this probably hasn't happened in years!

>>22423
Are you going to take that shit from one of your fragment personalities?

>>22423

Shit just got real. No, past real.

Shit just got nonfiction.

>>22430
SHIT JUST GOT CREATIVE WRITING 101 FINAL WRITTEN ON ACID THE NIGHT BEFORE IT IS DUE, THAT IS HOW FAR BEYOND REAL WE HAVE GOTTEN.

Xom 2009/08/03(Mon)21:23 No. 22452 ID: f2de2f
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>Q canceled task: Attack Xom. Interrupted by carp.

>>22452
I so want to see this animated.

God, my favorite deity takes on my favorite bro.

Today is a special day.

Suggestion 2009/08/03(Mon)22:06 No. 22482 ID: bd2eec
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>>22452
A Carp?
That's ALL YOU GOT?!
AIN'T GOT TIME FER THIS SHIT, XOM.

>Xom canceled task: Standing up. Interrupted by F+D+DF+P.

>>22482
See.. that would have been more impressive if you used your eararm

COMBO! Reaver!mE1ODcDVTM 2009/08/03(Mon)22:13 No. 22486 ID: fb5d8e
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POWER AWAY!!!!!

Suggestion 2009/08/03(Mon)22:27 No. 22490 ID: f2de2f
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>>22482
I TRIED TO BE NICE, Q. I AM A GOD OF LOVE! SO FEEL MY LOVE, Q! FEEL IT!

>>22490
Xom, did you ever meet anyone with a name like 'picasso'?

>>22486

Can our daring duo demolish this dark doer of develish deeds?!

Can our champion's cod ear conundrum be concluded?!

Find out this and more, with 1000 screaming elephants!

Next time, on Xom!

>>22490
This picture makes me feel dirty.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)00:54 No. 22583 ID: bd2eec
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>>22490
Man, you think I came this unarmed?

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)00:57 No. 22584 ID: bd2eec
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*POP!*

I TOLD you I ain't GOT TIME for this bullshit.
Got a little somethin' somethin' before I got here.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:00 No. 22586 ID: bd2eec
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Some 'Potion of Cure Mutation' an old man brewed fer me.
Told me dis shit'd come in handy if this happened.
Lucky fer me, you mutated another mouth onto my friggin' hand of all places.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:03 No. 22587 ID: bd2eec
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Now, if you don't mind, I gotta get this back to some beak-nosed dude, kid's having a 'massive mental breakdown' quoth his goblin girl.

Gotta get my money, y'herd?
Oh, REAVS, HOMEBOY.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:04 No. 22588 ID: bd2eec
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POSE WIT' A MOTHERFUCKA.
I'M UP OUT THIS BITCH.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:23 No. 22590 ID: bd2eec
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>>22588
*VWOOP~!*
Alright, there's my portal!
Home fre-
...


....
Ah shit.
Least I'm stuck in a state where Xom can't fuck with me.

>So, voices, I've heard you the whole time.
>I couldn't answer you back cause I had my hands full with gettin' you from Xom.
>Since I'm gonna be stuck here for a few minutes, there anythin' you wanna know?

Suggestion 2009/08/04(Tue)01:30 No. 22591 ID: d79977
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>>22590
You could start by telling us what the hell just happened.

>>22590
Finally! A capable individual for our most holy goal!

Punch EVERYTHING.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:50 No. 22593 ID: bd2eec
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>>22591
C'mon already...

>Well, to help you understand why I did it, I'm a delivery boy, of sorts. People pay me big money to deliver stuff that's...Well, let's just say out of the ordinary.
>I got paid by some weird...Dunno, goblin I guess? It wanted me to get this orb thingamajig back for some beak-nosed dude with her. Told me her boss had it taken and was having, as I said earlier, 'a massive mental breakdown'.

>Kid just looked like a dead guy to me.

>She explained what happened, I did some research and preparing on and for the guy I had to get it from, and voila. That's what you saw happen.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)01:59 No. 22596 ID: bd2eec
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>>22592

>I punch stuff as needed.

>Which happens to be a lot.

>Wait, what are you talking about 'holy goal'?

>You aren't gonna possess me like a ghost or some shit are you? It's gonna be a bad day for both of us if you do.

Reaver!mE1ODcDVTM 2009/08/04(Tue)02:15 No. 22597 ID: fb5d8e
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Yo dog, what's up with those dots on your nose, holmes. You a x-mas tree or what what what, bro?

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)02:20 No. 22598 ID: bd2eec
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>>22597
Huh?
Oh, sup Reav.
Might be just a mutation or some shit.
Potion took care of everything but that, I guess.
Can't see it right proper though...It's on my nose.

Reaver!mE1ODcDVTM 2009/08/04(Tue)02:25 No. 22599 ID: fb5d8e
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A'ight, bro, I'm down with dat.
Brofisticuff me, dog.
I'm out.
Peace.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)02:35 No. 22600 ID: bd2eec
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>>22599
Thanks for the crazy assist, broseidon.
Catch y'later.

Reaver!mE1ODcDVTM 2009/08/04(Tue)02:43 No. 22601 ID: fb5d8e
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Stay gnarly, brozekiel.

>>22601
what the fuck just happened, you guys

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)03:31 No. 22604 ID: bd2eec
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>>22602

>We brofisted. Reaver went to Brotown, NZ courtesy of Jumpfar Express.

>Man voices, don't you guys keep up?

>...And why the hell am I still stuck.

Xom 2009/08/04(Tue)03:47 No. 22605 ID: f2de2f
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Oh my... They took the orb.
But ol' Xom doesn't like a thing like that spoil his fun. Never, never, never, never, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER! NEVER! NEVER! NEVER! NEVER!

>>22604

We don't live in your zany world.

Or do we?

>>22605

Those things must be easy to make; no wonder there are so many Quests.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)04:09 No. 22607 ID: bd2eec
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>>22606

>Doesn't matter if you are or aren't. That's where he went.
>>22605
ARE YOU KIDDING ME

DID I JUST FIGHT A CHAOS GOD FOR NOTHING

I'M KICKING THAT BIRDFACE IN THE NECK WHEN I GET BACK

IF THAT JACKASS WOULD FIX THE FUCKING CONNECTION

FUCKING BIRDFACE

FUCKING XOM

FUCKING ARGENT

I'M KICKING ALL YOUR ASSES WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE

>>22607

Birdface? Do you mean Tzeentch?

Also, I said that to explain why we have trouble keeping up.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)04:19 No. 22609 ID: bd2eec
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>>22608

Sigh.

>...Naw, it ain't Tzeentch. Beakhead's name was...I dunno. Goblin called him Mushypants. Seemed to REALLY like him.

>And if you wanna know stuff, I've been offering to explain what I can. Did already. Y'all voices aren't keepin' up.

>>22609

Oh, Muschio, or however you spell it.

Besides, I doubt your explanation would make much sense to us.

>>22605

XOM.
YOU WILL FIX THE GENTLEMAN'S NOSE.
THE EIGHT ORBS COMMAND IT.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)04:40 No. 22615 ID: bd2eec
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>>22610
>That's his name? Weird one. Suppose it fits, though.

>An honest attempt at it couldn't hurt though. I'm bored and not going anywhere, apparently. Neither are you. Maybe I can tell you a little bit about myself since you might be staying in my possession.

>>22615

Fine; it's not like we can move, anyway.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)04:49 No. 22617 ID: bd2eec
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>>22616

>Ha ha, well, I suppose that's what I was tryin' t'get at, I guess.

>So uh. Any questions you can think of to ask or should I give a basic spiel?

We don't know enough to know what to ask. Just give us the basics.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)05:15 No. 22619 ID: bd2eec
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>>22618
>Okay, I'll try and think of images to help describe, if that'll assist.

>My name is Q, age twenty...Something, I lost track, uh...
>Said earlier I'm a weird stuff delivery boy, means I get paid a lot of money to take unnatural items and deliver them to the destination safe and sound. Like I was going to with this Orb 'fore I got stuck.

>Uh, I like good food, fancy a lot of different music and enjoy watching television (which is a box that produces moving pictures and sound) when I have a day off from my work.

>And I live with three others, one of whom might be dead by the end of the day.

>>22619

We know what a television is, Q; you also remind me of that guy from Star Trek, who was much more entertaining than you. So far, at least.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)05:46 No. 22621 ID: bd2eec
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>>22620
>Oh? Funny coincidence. This one job I was on, I got stuck, of all places, on the Enterprise trying to deliver a package to some big-eared fuck who was afraid to take it. So I'm sitting in the lounge for a week, trying to talk this guy into it.

>Where the funny coincidence comes in is that I MET, of all the people on that ship, Q during my week-stay there. Really laid-back, pretty funny guy. He was tough to beat in shot-drinkin' duels, even without omnipotent powers.

>And sorry if I'm not delightfullyamusing. It's kinda tough when you are wedged into the ground.

>So, any questions? If not, I guess I'll try wriggling around and hopefully either kick Argent in the face or fall through.

Try and see if you can; we'd help, but, y'know.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)06:05 No. 22624 ID: bd2eec
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>>22622
>Yeah, hold on...

Hrmf-
Hrnk-
ARGENT, JUST PUT IT IN REVERSE YOU MORON

>Oh! I felt my foot hit something. Felt....Fleshy. Aw shit.

>>22624

That doesn't sound good.

>>22624
You are of near omnipotent power, right? Why don't you just bisect yourself? I mean, you can knit yourself back together later on ...

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)06:17 No. 22628 ID: bd2eec
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>>22626
>Not good at all if it was either fleshy person.
>This Argent guy. His skin is like rubber, normally.
>Wait, hold on...

*klik*

Aw hell.

*VRRUUUUUUUUM*
NOT THIS SHIT AGAAAAAAAAiiiiiiiiiinnn...

>>22628
Oh snap.

>>22628

This is new.

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)06:55 No. 22637 ID: bd2eec
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>>22629
>>22633
>guess you guys are coming along for the ride

*POOFT*

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)06:56 No. 22638 ID: bd2eec
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>>22637
*fizzle*

Q 2009/08/04(Tue)07:02 No. 22639 ID: bd2eec
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>Delivery Complete.
>Prologue END

>>22637
>>22638

Awesome. That kinda reminded me of Quantum Gate travel.

Xom 2009/08/04(Tue)17:22 No. 22896 ID: f2de2f
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While you're in interdimensional transit, I just want to say that punching me in the face was not cool. It's a hurtful thing to do and... SURPRISE!

Xom 2009/08/04(Tue)17:22 No. 22897 ID: f2de2f
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>>22896
Animatronic

>>22897
FLICK
FLICK
BANG

>>22601
TEAM REAVER'S BLASTING OFF AGAAAAAAIIIN~
*ding*

Why have you not been archived yet?

>>40275
Because mods are lazy.

>>40275
>>40278

ALRIGHT, I'LL MOVE IT, GEEZ.