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File 124934856573.png - (167.97KB , 673x576 , underpants.png )
22208 No. 22208 ID: f2de2f

It's come to my attention that you people are abusing these Sphere of Unlimited Self-Conceptualization dealies and giving people bad advice and making nuisances of yourselves. So I'm taking them away.
Expand all images
>>
No. 22211 ID: 227d44

Xom stop Xomming
>>
No. 22215 ID: 45afb1

Xom stop Xomming
>>
No. 22216 ID: f2de2f
File 124934890439.png - (174.95KB , 673x576 , jumping.png )
22216

JUST KIDDING!
>>
No. 22217 ID: 6faa8c

Xom stop Xomming
>>
No. 22218 ID: 7eda8b

Grow breasts now.
>>
No. 22219 ID: 04f34c

Oh ho! How amusing. Good show sir.
>>22218 Second.
>>
No. 22221 ID: 5ba271

Put on some damn pants already.
>>
No. 22226 ID: 1f5d37

You're fapping with that other hand, aren't you?
>>
No. 22296 ID: da5997

Fly around like an aeroplane, Xom. Make motorboat noises with your lips while you do so.
>>
No. 22329 ID: 9a71e2

You should do something with... Tentacles next.
>>
No. 22353 ID: f2de2f
File 124935509023.png - (106.52KB , 519x451 , Eggplant.png )
22353

>>22296
>>22329
Hey! Do I tell you how to do your job? Noooo... Chaos is about subtlety, artistry and dumping 10,000 rocks on some poor chump's head for no reason!
>>
No. 22355 ID: 04f34c

>>22353
Teach us oh wise Xomite master.
>>
No. 22357 ID: 9dd38f

>>22353

You remind me of a guy that I met once; something starting with a t.
>>
No. 22360 ID: 5ba271

>Eggplant.png

SUDDENLY EGGPLANT WIZARDS

MILLIONS OF THEM
>>
No. 22367 ID: bd2eec
File 124935555331.png - (109.29KB , 554x557 , Xom What.png )
22367

>>22353
NAY, XOM!
LOOK TO THE SKY!
TIS A BIRD NOR PLANE!
>>
No. 22368 ID: bd2eec
File 124935561263.png - (308.69KB , 1068x665 , BRINGING THE PAIN.png )
22368

NAW, IT'S Q, MOTHERFUCKER.
AND I'M BRINGING THE PAIN!
>>
No. 22369 ID: 04f34c

What is this? I dont even...

XOM! TAKE NO SHIT! PUNCH HIS LIGHTS OUT!
>>
No. 22370 ID: 1b3eb5

...wat
>>
No. 22372 ID: bd2eec
File 124935573133.png - (121.54KB , 521x592 , Damn Xom.png )
22372

...Bedamned, you got a strong jaw, Xom.
Oop!
Caught it.
>>
No. 22373 ID: 04f34c

KNOCK HIS BLOCK OFF XOM!
>>
No. 22374 ID: f2de2f
File 124935576256.png - (100.22KB , 578x541 , berylium.png )
22374

>>22357
Tomato, tomatoe, potato, potatoe. The art direction is going downhill kiddies! But at least I completely forgot what we were just talking about.
>>
No. 22379 ID: 9dd38f

>>22374

I wasn't talking about a sentient vegetable; of course, it's hard to get the point across to you.
>>
No. 22380 ID: f2de2f
File 124935615480.png - (115.52KB , 561x679 , karaoke.png )
22380

>>22372
I AM NOT AMUSED AT ALL! Gimme back my toy!
>>
No. 22382 ID: 04f34c

Give him back the orb dude. Then take no shit! Get punched in the FACE!
>>
No. 22389 ID: f2de2f
File 124935682818.png - (82.02KB , 732x768 , boiled.png )
22389

Touch~ <3
>>
No. 22399 ID: 9dd38f

>>22389

Uh-oh.
>>
No. 22400 ID: 9a71e2

>>22389
I'd tell you to run, but it wouldn't do any good...
>>
No. 22412 ID: bd2eec
File 124935752839.png - (120.19KB , 845x483 , thatyourdick.png )
22412

>>22380
Oops, sorry, taken aback by...
Is that your dick?
>>
No. 22414 ID: bd2eec
File 124935757863.png - (117.07KB , 539x604 , WHOAWHOAWHOA.png )
22414

>>22389
WHOA WHOA
WHAT THE
WHOA
>>
No. 22415 ID: 145c6d

This quest confuses, scares, and arouses me.
>>
No. 22419 ID: 04f34c

oh shit dude. Watch out. That things totally going to punch you.
Whats this quest called? Chaosquest? Xomquest?
>>
No. 22421 ID: 9a71e2

>>22412
I don't really want to see what Xom's cockslap does after seeing what the touch does.
>>22414
You should get a tiny hand crossbow and shoot people with your face.
>>
No. 22423 ID: fb5d8e
File 124935784817.png - (63.61KB , 800x600 , GODSLAYER.png )
22423

YO GET YO FILTHY PAWS OF MY HOMEBOY, TEABAG
>>
No. 22424 ID: 9dd38f

>>22423

Xom got hit in the face!

Twice!

Something like this probably hasn't happened in years!
>>
No. 22429 ID: 9a71e2

>>22423
Are you going to take that shit from one of your fragment personalities?
>>
No. 22430 ID: 9e9b47

>>22423

Shit just got real. No, past real.

Shit just got nonfiction.
>>
No. 22446 ID: 6164e0

>>22430
SHIT JUST GOT CREATIVE WRITING 101 FINAL WRITTEN ON ACID THE NIGHT BEFORE IT IS DUE, THAT IS HOW FAR BEYOND REAL WE HAVE GOTTEN.
>>
No. 22452 ID: f2de2f
File 124935980848.png - (284.33KB , 1024x768 , chimichanga.png )
22452

>Q canceled task: Attack Xom. Interrupted by carp.
>>
No. 22454 ID: 9a71e2

>>22452
I so want to see this animated.
>>
No. 22464 ID: 55e935

God, my favorite deity takes on my favorite bro.

Today is a special day.
>>
No. 22482 ID: bd2eec
File 12493623715.png - (448.28KB , 800x638 , TAKE A SEAT.png )
22482

>>22452
A Carp?
That's ALL YOU GOT?!
AIN'T GOT TIME FER THIS SHIT, XOM.

>Xom canceled task: Standing up. Interrupted by F+D+DF+P.
>>
No. 22484 ID: 04f34c

>>22482
See.. that would have been more impressive if you used your eararm
>>
No. 22486 ID: fb5d8e
File 124936278787.jpg - (120.93KB , 800x638 , YOU-OKAY.jpg )
22486

POWER AWAY!!!!!
>>
No. 22490 ID: f2de2f
File 124936365112.png - (177.96KB , 768x576 , clock.png )
22490

>>22482
I TRIED TO BE NICE, Q. I AM A GOD OF LOVE! SO FEEL MY LOVE, Q! FEEL IT!
>>
No. 22494 ID: 9a71e2

>>22490
Xom, did you ever meet anyone with a name like 'picasso'?
>>
No. 22505 ID: 9e9b47

>>22486

Can our daring duo demolish this dark doer of develish deeds?!

Can our champion's cod ear conundrum be concluded?!

Find out this and more, with 1000 screaming elephants!

Next time, on Xom!
>>
No. 22550 ID: 145c6d

>>22490
This picture makes me feel dirty.
>>
No. 22583 ID: bd2eec
File 124937247720.png - (106.07KB , 500x397 , NOTIME.png )
22583

>>22490
Man, you think I came this unarmed?
>>
No. 22584 ID: bd2eec
File 124937262671.png - (65.00KB , 487x454 , NOTIME2.png )
22584

*POP!*

I TOLD you I ain't GOT TIME for this bullshit.
Got a little somethin' somethin' before I got here.
>>
No. 22586 ID: bd2eec
File 124937284481.png - (47.91KB , 599x679 , neverwiddout.png )
22586

Some 'Potion of Cure Mutation' an old man brewed fer me.
Told me dis shit'd come in handy if this happened.
Lucky fer me, you mutated another mouth onto my friggin' hand of all places.
>>
No. 22587 ID: bd2eec
File 124937300456.png - (96.80KB , 400x438 , icheated.png )
22587

Now, if you don't mind, I gotta get this back to some beak-nosed dude, kid's having a 'massive mental breakdown' quoth his goblin girl.

Gotta get my money, y'herd?
Oh, REAVS, HOMEBOY.
>>
No. 22588 ID: bd2eec
File 124937309563.png - (185.58KB , 699x732 , totesdone.png )
22588

POSE WIT' A MOTHERFUCKA.
I'M UP OUT THIS BITCH.
>>
No. 22590 ID: bd2eec
File 124937423350.png - (97.96KB , 586x585 , ah shit.png )
22590

>>22588
*VWOOP~!*
Alright, there's my portal!
Home fre-
...


....
Ah shit.
Least I'm stuck in a state where Xom can't fuck with me.

>So, voices, I've heard you the whole time.
>I couldn't answer you back cause I had my hands full with gettin' you from Xom.
>Since I'm gonna be stuck here for a few minutes, there anythin' you wanna know?
>>
No. 22591 ID: d79977
File 124937462593.jpg - (60.49KB , 471x694 , 1216351563245.jpg )
22591

>>22590
You could start by telling us what the hell just happened.
>>
No. 22592 ID: 2f3a53

>>22590
Finally! A capable individual for our most holy goal!

Punch EVERYTHING.
>>
No. 22593 ID: bd2eec
File 124937584696.png - (97.56KB , 587x586 , Alright.png )
22593

>>22591
C'mon already...

>Well, to help you understand why I did it, I'm a delivery boy, of sorts. People pay me big money to deliver stuff that's...Well, let's just say out of the ordinary.
>I got paid by some weird...Dunno, goblin I guess? It wanted me to get this orb thingamajig back for some beak-nosed dude with her. Told me her boss had it taken and was having, as I said earlier, 'a massive mental breakdown'.

>Kid just looked like a dead guy to me.

>She explained what happened, I did some research and preparing on and for the guy I had to get it from, and voila. That's what you saw happen.
>>
No. 22596 ID: bd2eec
File 124937636972.png - (94.94KB , 581x577 , WhatDoYouMean.png )
22596

>>22592

>I punch stuff as needed.

>Which happens to be a lot.

>Wait, what are you talking about 'holy goal'?

>You aren't gonna possess me like a ghost or some shit are you? It's gonna be a bad day for both of us if you do.
>>
No. 22597 ID: fb5d8e
File 124937733453.png - (30.95KB , 581x577 , Q1.png )
22597

Yo dog, what's up with those dots on your nose, holmes. You a x-mas tree or what what what, bro?
>>
No. 22598 ID: bd2eec
File 124937760866.png - (87.35KB , 581x573 , iunnoreav.png )
22598

>>22597
Huh?
Oh, sup Reav.
Might be just a mutation or some shit.
Potion took care of everything but that, I guess.
Can't see it right proper though...It's on my nose.
>>
No. 22599 ID: fb5d8e
File 124937793957.png - (30.53KB , 581x577 , Q2.png )
22599

A'ight, bro, I'm down with dat.
Brofisticuff me, dog.
I'm out.
Peace.
>>
No. 22600 ID: bd2eec
File 124937851251.png - (93.60KB , 578x571 , thanks.png )
22600

>>22599
Thanks for the crazy assist, broseidon.
Catch y'later.
>>
No. 22601 ID: fb5d8e
File 12493790226.gif - (132.92KB , 581x577 , Q3.gif )
22601

Stay gnarly, brozekiel.
>>
No. 22602 ID: 227d44

>>22601
what the fuck just happened, you guys
>>
No. 22604 ID: bd2eec
File 124938186491.png - (95.00KB , 581x582 , damnitvoices.png )
22604

>>22602

>We brofisted. Reaver went to Brotown, NZ courtesy of Jumpfar Express.

>Man voices, don't you guys keep up?

>...And why the hell am I still stuck.
>>
No. 22605 ID: f2de2f
File 124938282425.png - (168.72KB , 768x576 , spotted gecko.png )
22605

Oh my... They took the orb.
But ol' Xom doesn't like a thing like that spoil his fun. Never, never, never, never, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER! NEVER! NEVER! NEVER! NEVER!
>>
No. 22606 ID: 9dd38f

>>22604

We don't live in your zany world.

Or do we?

>>22605

Those things must be easy to make; no wonder there are so many Quests.
>>
No. 22607 ID: bd2eec
File 124938417956.png - (95.96KB , 577x571 , FUCKSPLOSION.png )
22607

>>22606

>Doesn't matter if you are or aren't. That's where he went.
>>22605
ARE YOU KIDDING ME

DID I JUST FIGHT A CHAOS GOD FOR NOTHING

I'M KICKING THAT BIRDFACE IN THE NECK WHEN I GET BACK

IF THAT JACKASS WOULD FIX THE FUCKING CONNECTION

FUCKING BIRDFACE

FUCKING XOM

FUCKING ARGENT

I'M KICKING ALL YOUR ASSES WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE
>>
No. 22608 ID: 9dd38f

>>22607

Birdface? Do you mean Tzeentch?

Also, I said that to explain why we have trouble keeping up.
>>
No. 22609 ID: bd2eec
File 124938475559.png - (99.74KB , 578x571 , raspberry.png )
22609

>>22608

Sigh.

>...Naw, it ain't Tzeentch. Beakhead's name was...I dunno. Goblin called him Mushypants. Seemed to REALLY like him.

>And if you wanna know stuff, I've been offering to explain what I can. Did already. Y'all voices aren't keepin' up.
>>
No. 22610 ID: 9dd38f

>>22609

Oh, Muschio, or however you spell it.

Besides, I doubt your explanation would make much sense to us.
>>
No. 22611 ID: e5d95c

>>22605

XOM.
YOU WILL FIX THE GENTLEMAN'S NOSE.
THE EIGHT ORBS COMMAND IT.
>>
No. 22615 ID: bd2eec
File 124938600039.png - (97.57KB , 583x563 , wellshit.png )
22615

>>22610
>That's his name? Weird one. Suppose it fits, though.

>An honest attempt at it couldn't hurt though. I'm bored and not going anywhere, apparently. Neither are you. Maybe I can tell you a little bit about myself since you might be staying in my possession.
>>
No. 22616 ID: 9dd38f

>>22615

Fine; it's not like we can move, anyway.
>>
No. 22617 ID: bd2eec
File 124938655242.png - (97.10KB , 579x568 , wellyeah.png )
22617

>>22616

>Ha ha, well, I suppose that's what I was tryin' t'get at, I guess.

>So uh. Any questions you can think of to ask or should I give a basic spiel?
>>
No. 22618 ID: 1f5d37

We don't know enough to know what to ask. Just give us the basics.
>>
No. 22619 ID: bd2eec
File 124938810633.png - (99.79KB , 761x484 , thoughtprocess.png )
22619

>>22618
>Okay, I'll try and think of images to help describe, if that'll assist.

>My name is Q, age twenty...Something, I lost track, uh...
>Said earlier I'm a weird stuff delivery boy, means I get paid a lot of money to take unnatural items and deliver them to the destination safe and sound. Like I was going to with this Orb 'fore I got stuck.

>Uh, I like good food, fancy a lot of different music and enjoy watching television (which is a box that produces moving pictures and sound) when I have a day off from my work.

>And I live with three others, one of whom might be dead by the end of the day.
>>
No. 22620 ID: 9dd38f

>>22619

We know what a television is, Q; you also remind me of that guy from Star Trek, who was much more entertaining than you. So far, at least.
>>
No. 22621 ID: bd2eec
File 124938996212.png - (84.60KB , 566x620 , QStuck.png )
22621

>>22620
>Oh? Funny coincidence. This one job I was on, I got stuck, of all places, on the Enterprise trying to deliver a package to some big-eared fuck who was afraid to take it. So I'm sitting in the lounge for a week, trying to talk this guy into it.

>Where the funny coincidence comes in is that I MET, of all the people on that ship, Q during my week-stay there. Really laid-back, pretty funny guy. He was tough to beat in shot-drinkin' duels, even without omnipotent powers.

>And sorry if I'm not delightfullyamusing. It's kinda tough when you are wedged into the ground.

>So, any questions? If not, I guess I'll try wriggling around and hopefully either kick Argent in the face or fall through.
>>
No. 22622 ID: 9dd38f

Try and see if you can; we'd help, but, y'know.
>>
No. 22624 ID: bd2eec
File 124939111844.gif - (34.39KB , 547x462 , QAttempt.gif )
22624

>>22622
>Yeah, hold on...

Hrmf-
Hrnk-
ARGENT, JUST PUT IT IN REVERSE YOU MORON

>Oh! I felt my foot hit something. Felt....Fleshy. Aw shit.
>>
No. 22626 ID: 9dd38f

>>22624

That doesn't sound good.
>>
No. 22627 ID: c84ceb

>>22624
You are of near omnipotent power, right? Why don't you just bisect yourself? I mean, you can knit yourself back together later on ...
>>
No. 22628 ID: bd2eec
File 124939187022.png - (57.06KB , 493x391 , QSHIIIIT.png )
22628

>>22626
>Not good at all if it was either fleshy person.
>This Argent guy. His skin is like rubber, normally.
>Wait, hold on...

*klik*

Aw hell.

*VRRUUUUUUUUM*
NOT THIS SHIT AGAAAAAAAAiiiiiiiiiinnn...
>>
No. 22629 ID: c84ceb

>>22628
Oh snap.
>>
No. 22633 ID: 9dd38f

>>22628

This is new.
>>
No. 22637 ID: bd2eec
File 124939414452.gif - (38.91KB , 270x459 , QSuckedIn.gif )
22637

>>22629
>>22633
>guess you guys are coming along for the ride

*POOFT*
>>
No. 22638 ID: bd2eec
File 124939419313.gif - (30.82KB , 587x464 , QBurnt.gif )
22638

>>22637
*fizzle*
>>
No. 22639 ID: bd2eec
File 124939453744.gif - (25.76KB , 483x500 , PrologueAfter.gif )
22639

>Delivery Complete.
>Prologue END
>>
No. 22640 ID: 9dd38f

>>22637
>>22638

Awesome. That kinda reminded me of Quantum Gate travel.
>>
No. 22896 ID: f2de2f
File 124943173533.png - (282.78KB , 1024x768 , nylon.png )
22896

While you're in interdimensional transit, I just want to say that punching me in the face was not cool. It's a hurtful thing to do and... SURPRISE!
>>
No. 22897 ID: f2de2f
File 124943176851.gif - (44.34KB , 724x496 , Gorilla.gif )
22897

>>22896
Animatronic
>>
No. 22902 ID: 6faa8c

>>22897
FLICK
FLICK
BANG
>>
No. 22909 ID: cde660

>>22601
TEAM REAVER'S BLASTING OFF AGAAAAAAIIIN~
*ding*
>>
No. 40275 ID: 46c091

Why have you not been archived yet?
>>
No. 40278 ID: 9891a9

>>40275
Because mods are lazy.
>>
No. 40293 ID: d75539

>>40275
>>40278

ALRIGHT, I'LL MOVE IT, GEEZ.
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