Apples 2024/05/12(Sun)15:08 No. 1090793 ID: 435f13
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You are the Booty Dragon and you need to get your shit together.

You've been lazing about too long. It's natural for a dragon to take a gap century but this is getting ridiculous.

To do:

1. Kidnap a princess

2. Gather a hoard

3. Find a mate

A princess will brighten your day! And less to haul around than hoard additions.

Kidnap a rich, cute dragon princess to get all of them done at once!

You need to decide what to hoard. No, it can't be princesses, that's too easy. You also need clothes. Get some and pick what to hoard with a shopping trip!

1 AND 3

our princess will be our mate!
but what if, a prince instead? *GASP* Why hasn't any dragoness thought of kidnapping a prince before?!? GENIUS

>>1090799
Why, you're a genius! Nobody will expect us to kidnap a Prince. Everybody expects you to kidnap a princess. But a prince? Never! It'll be as easy as pie. They'll never see it coming. And what will they do? Send a female knight to save him?

2 first, get a job you bum.

1 and 2

Kid-napping is a natural step after napping

The hoard is probably the easiest thing to just help us get off our duff and moving. It can just be a starter hoard, and you can upgrade it later. You live in like a mountain lair, right? It should be a cinch to gather up a bunch of rocks for you to sit on instead of lying on the bare floor of a cave. Gold and jewels is basically rocks, anyway, so we can just trade out ordinary rocks for better ones later.

>>1090793

Ladies, gentlemen and booty dragons.

May I humbly suggest the hoarding of princesses?

Such a collection will draw the attention of knights, princes and even envious dragons from whom can be found a potential mate.

>>1090807
That sounds like way too much work. Why not just skip all the steps and get a Prince and making him our mate? Also, having a hoard that has an expiration date seems pretty dumb.

Kidnap a princess to be your wingperson on the mate hunt.

>>1090793
need that hoard for the other two to work properly, I mean what mate or noble prisoner is gonna take a hoardless dragon seriously?

2 first! You can't expect to get a decent mate without a hoard to show off! And imagine the embarrassment of bringing a princess back to a hoardless home! Especially when you're the Booty Dragon!! You have booty, but no booty!!! I recommend extorting tribute through threats of the mighty weight of your ass. Preferably from pirates, but that'll probably not be easy.

Kidnap a mate.

Hey is there anything out there that makes healthy progeny with a dragon like you OTHER than a male of your species?

>>1090799
I think this is great

1 is too hard and too cliche
2 is too hard
3 is also hard, butttt... it's possible if he comes to you! Place a sign near your cave and the problem is solved.

We should do both 2 *and* 3.

Hoard Mates

Check on your inheritance. If it's a wallet of moths, you may need to panic.

This is child’s play.

Kidnap-woo a RICH princess, then return her only on condition of betrothal and a bride’s prize. Kingdom gets a dragon on the family roster, you get a free hoard and a princess-mate to keep.

1-2-3 you’re done! With no possible downsides or long-term complications!

>>1090799

We gotta aim high. We *can* have a princess mate.

Princess kidnappjng tip: Make sure there are no pesky plumbers nearby! You have no clue how irritating they can be once they start moving in your direction.

>>1090793
3

(1/3) Apples 2024/05/13(Mon)18:42 No. 1090892 ID: 435f13
File 171565095365.png - (83.27KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 2.png )

>Kidnap a rich, cute dragon princess to get all of them done at once!

Multitasking! Why work harder when you can work smarter?

You like this plan. You like this plan a lot. A rich, cute dragon princess is a one-stop shop!

Who's a failure now, mom and dad!

(2/3) Apples 2024/05/13(Mon)18:42 No. 1090893 ID: 435f13
File 171565095606.png - (88.27KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 3.png )

Oh but wait... most dragon royalty got that way by being bigger and stronger than you. It's not that easy to kidnap someone who can fight back.

Plus, when you kidnap a princess, the humans send knights after you and that's bad enough. If you kidnap a dragon princess who knows what her family will send after you!

Oh well. Looks like it's you who are the failure now.

(3/3) Apples 2024/05/13(Mon)18:42 No. 1090894 ID: 435f13
File 171565095906.png - (67.17KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 4.png )

>Hey is there anything out there that makes healthy progeny with a dragon like you OTHER than a male of your species?

Well sure dragons can mate with just about anything if they want. You just need a good fertility spell and goodness knows your mom keeps plenty of those in her library.

>but what if, a prince instead? *GASP* Why hasn't any dragoness thought of kidnapping a prince before?!? GENIUS

Of course! You must be the world's smartest dragon to be the first one to think of this!

G E N E I O U S

>>1090894
Ok go do that then.

Do you know where any good princes are? Try looking in one of those old peerage books for hot kings who would have hot decedents.

>>1090904
This, with bonus points for noble houses with names like Longwood and Johnson

If you show up as you are to a prince's castle he'll probably hop right into your arms.

I heard there's a very blocky Prince around with a mythical rectangular cock!

>>1090894
Wait, wouldn't the prince do the kidnapping in this case? Oh no...

That's not smart.
But your next thought is:
Kidnap a trans-prince!
Use ancient draconic magics - mostly by crimping off a MAAS (magic as a service) - to locate any prince or princess with gender dysphoria.
Standard stealth dragonkin-form kidnapping, then offer to change their gender in exchange for their stupid kingdom.
PROFIT.

Hope he doesn't look like that. But yes, a rich prince would also tick all the boxes. Still, how do you go about finding one? Or one finding you? If no one's attacked you in all these years, then there might be a problem with your advertising strategy.

>>1090894
Quick remember what qualities you'd like in a potential mate and then review local nobility to find a suitable match

Check online quick for hot princes in your area! Watch out for viruses and spyware

What if you kidnapped a prince only to convince him to kidnap you, all so that you could puppet the prince and have control over some small duchy somewhere, gotta start small, but that also means consistent income,

That is the power of trying to make Stockholm syndrome happen

Definitely find a prince. But one that, despite the title, doesn't want to govern or anything, but instead wants to ride a dragon, go looting and raiding and amassing wealth and independent tribute 'vassals' like a bandit king or pirate, 'ride a dragon', start a family, be house-husband, and the like.

(1/3) Apples 2024/05/15(Wed)18:51 No. 1091022 ID: 435f13
File 171582426023.png - (61.68KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 5.png )

>Check online quick for hot princes in your area! Watch out for viruses and spyware

Check online?? Do you look like you own a computer? Or could even use one? They don't make keyboards for your clumsy dragon mitts.

Nope, if you're going to find hot princes in your area, you're just going to have to go out there and find one IRL!

You don your best shirt and prepare to venture forth.

(2/3) Apples 2024/05/15(Wed)18:51 No. 1091023 ID: 435f13
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Look out, world! Here comes the booty dragon!

(3/3) Apples 2024/05/15(Wed)18:51 No. 1091024 ID: 435f13
File 171582426986.png - (45.84KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 7.png )

EEEEK! A dragon! Helllllllllllllp!

A dragon?! WHERE?
Go see what the trouble is.

sounds like someone needs your help

DYNAMIC ENTRY!

If thats a princess who came all this way up here to your lair looking to get kidnapped, tell her she is not your type and she should be ashamed of herself for stereotyping you as a princess kidnapper just because you're a dragon when you are actually more interested in princes now.

Whoever that was, eat them.

Go help whoever it is! After all, you can get valuable information!

Quick! Rescue them from the dragon!

Then kidnap the dragon and demand ransom. Genius!

Wait did that come from next to you? You haven’t even left yet were the hell did this guy come from? At least wait until you leave your yard before you start panicking you jackass.

That's a funny phone ringtone you got there.

>>1091029
Always going to support this can't go wrong with a dynamic entry

>>1091024
Yes to dynamic entry , but then foĺow up with your best seductive pose.

Gotta make a good impression incase theyre hawt enough to be a mate.

Quick we need to get out of this! Prepare to be like "Whoa hey are you stereotyping me? That's not cool dude, we're in a progressive era now, it's not all dragons you speciesist."

This is probably an insurance scam. Get your phone out to record your interactions for the court.

Excuse you, that is offensive and typecasting. How rude!

Your first victim! Kidnap this person; you can crown them a prince afterwards, and thereby accomplish one of your biggest goals.

Prince! Capture! Do you have any pokeballs on you? If not, then just grab him, since you’re a big dragon.

(1/3) Apples 2024/05/17(Fri)19:58 No. 1091172 ID: 435f13
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>DYNAMIC ENTRY!

RAWR! You're a big scary dragon rawr!

(2/3) Apples 2024/05/17(Fri)19:59 No. 1091173 ID: 435f13
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Princess Tittiana: "EEEEEK! THE DRAGON IS ON A RAMPAGE!"

(3/3) Apples 2024/05/17(Fri)19:59 No. 1091174 ID: 435f13
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Princess Tittiana: "Oh no! It's totally kidnapping me! Oh dear! Why oh why didn't I listen to my royal parents when they warned me this cave was the home of a fearsome, fire breathing dragon??"

What is going on here??

Just play along. A runaway! I'll steal her! No one will ever know!

ask her if she wants to go back to your cave and makeout

Looks like someone's volunteering to assist on your prince quest.

You're no prince!

Though...

Hey, you wouldn't happen to have a non-rectangular dick, would you?

>>1091174
...y'know what sure. Not like you'll question a freebie.

Take her and go. Maybe once you get there ask her if she likes board games or something.

sweet free princess, at this rate you might be able to kidnap you self a royal harem.

>>1091181
Come right here and volunteer

Change of plan we're back to plan A

Play along, and when you grab her and lift her, whisper at her, 'Alright, so where's whoever I'm hamming this up for?'

>>1091174
Wow! Your parents are going to be super proud of you for kidnapping a princess! Now you just have to do your other objectives and you can go back to your nap.

>>1091174
Wow she has bigger tits then the dragon

Kick this crossdresser out.

>>1091174
Ask who sent her. Your parents?

The boldness on this one...
but im not sure thats a real princess.

Taste Test!
Give her a big lick and see if she tastes like commoner or inbred posho.

Careful I think she wants to steal your Jordans.

"How stupid do you think I am?"
This is obviously a trick. Rip this fraud's clothes to shreds, bury her crown, skateboard her body through the mud, and deposit her in the nearest ghetto.

...slow day at the kingdom?

"You are not trying to get me into a pyramid scheme, are you?"

>>1091174
Don't question it.
Sit on her.

>>1091264
Hmmm.
She doesnt look like the daughter of a pharaoh but be cautious. She could be in de nile.

(1/3) Apples 2024/05/20(Mon)19:04 No. 1091432 ID: 435f13
File 171625708388.png - (71.82KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 11.png )

>Play along, and when you grab her and lift her, whisper at her, 'Alright, so where's whoever I'm hamming this up for?'

You sense that the princess's fear might be an act. You scoop the mammarific maiden up in your claws and lean in close.

"Alright, so where's whoever I'm hamming this up for?" you ask.

Princess Tittiana: "Ohhh heeeelllp! The beast has me in its horrible clutches!—that's himoverthere—oh somebody save me please!"

(2/3) Apples 2024/05/20(Mon)19:04 No. 1091433 ID: 435f13
File 171625708768.png - (75.70KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 12.png )

A shining knight on his trusty steed crests the top of a nearby hill.

White Knight: "How dare ye molest the fair maiden, beast! Unhand her at once or taste the sting of my steel!"

The White Knight unsheathes his sword and brandishes it in your direction.

White Knight: "Take heart, fair lass! once I have rescued you, we shall be married and you will feel the passion of the White Knight!"

(3/3) Apples 2024/05/20(Mon)19:05 No. 1091434 ID: 435f13
File 171625711557.png - (85.30KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 13.png )

>Give her a big lick and see if she tastes like commoner or inbred posho.

What a creep. You open your toothy maw and give the princess a long lick with your huge, slimy tongue while making eye-contact with the White Knight the entire time, thus claiming the princess as your own.

Taste test results: 100% real princess

Indeed he is a creep. Him. That guy over there, not anyone else. His tongue probably isn't even a foot long.

Alright, since she wants you to perform your 'role', might as well lean into it. "Ah-hah-hah! A delectable princess! You will never stop me, impudent knight!"

And then you need to do some stuff to seem fierce, maybe a feat of strength, knock something over or break something maybe, and then make your escape to a safe-ish place (that the knight can eventually get to, after some questing maybe) with the princess in hand.


After all, you can't really have an involved conversation with the knight *right there*, and she doesn't want him dead (for now), and you do want to negotiate with this princess!


Like you have a lot to ask her and talk about. You know, about her kingdom, her goals, the other people of import, what she can offer you, who you two can manipulate and trick for mutual gain, the works.

Or maybe grab and throw a big rock but aim to miss, and then fly (your wings are magical enough to lift both you and the princess, right?) off away from the knight.

>>1091434

Combo these two:
>>1091441
>>1091442

Pretend to wreck some stuff, distract him, fly off and get ready for the main act.

"Only offer: Give me your @#$%ing money or I kill you both."
>If [Incomprehensible knight rhetorical crap]
"Screw this."
Throw princess at knight so hard it kills them both.
>If [Payment]
"Your tribute to the cause of freedom has pleased this slave owner. Alright, princess-what's-your-sexuality, do I leave you with him or not?"

"She has my germs so now she's sullied!"

Maybe his looks will make up for his manners? See if you can pull his helmet off with its plume. Try not to bite off his head, he might actually need it.

>>1091441
This

>>1091434
Whisper to the princess that you're expecting a reward for this. Or else.
Then put her down and get in a fight with the knight, purposefully lose in a mostly-believable way, and let them go. HOPEFULLY this will net you some gold.

Whatever action you take, do more tongue things to the princess because she's blushing while you're doing this and also tastes nice

Does the miscreant think his steel would bite even as gnat against the scales of your most impressive posterior? You need no missile, living or otherwise; one swing of your glorious backside will unhorse the man, allowing you to pick him clean of his armor and claim his horse, thus laying the foundations of your horde. Then, you can make off and make out with the princess, thereby accomplishing another important objective. Perhaps two!

>>1091441
This is perfect
Just look at yourself booty.
Shit, well in the process of being gotten together.
Go you!

Hmm, this princess is quite untamed, the term beast fits. But why would the knight call you a fair maiden? Is he into larger girls?

Just to make sure, ask the knight who he's calling a beast.

If he says it's you, then step up the drama by saying how his sharp words have cut deep into you and that you are defeated, as you lay on the ground and release the princess.

>>1091473
>>1091459
>>1091455

Careful with these suggestions. The knight might severely injure or maybe even kill you! Lance charges are no joke! Don't let him get near and don't submit; the throw a rock, posture, insult, and leave with the princess plan is the best.

>>1091441
This! But an addition!

>feat of strength

Tear your shirt off! That’d be pretty a impressive display, I think!

Or tear the Princess’s clothes! Or both! If fabric is being torn, strength is being displayed!

We still need to get a prince, yo...just having a princess isn't enough...booty needs a man.

>>1091479

There's probably a spell or some potions for that. Heck, there are probably options for females to be equipped as males with or without male fertility. And options for either temporary replacement or temporary supplement of the bottom, female bits. Heck, two females could probably mutually impregnate each other with the right magic! Weird sex stuff is one of the main and oldest uses of magic, you know!

>>1091482
That's so lame, though. Having a genuine prince would be much better. Any halfwit dragon can get a princess. It takes a real dragoness to take a prince.

>>1091484
And if you want the princess so much, why not take both? The prince as a mate, and the princess as..the princess. You can keep her too.

>>1091485

Knight is WAY too low ranked! This knight probably wants to increase in rank by killing you, rescuing the princess, and pleasing a King and earning a title and more lands or something. Roughly, the order from lowest to highest is: Esquire, Knight, Baronet, Baron, Viscount, Count, Duke, and only THEN Prince!

>>1091488

Wait so... in theory, with enough murder and fighting over rules of succession... this knight could become a prince?

>>1091504

Please. The world is feudal! You murder and conquer enough people, you get declared not just Prince, but King or Emperor. And as long as everyone agrees that you are a Queen or King or Raja or Shah or Khan or Sultan or Mansa or Pharaoh or whatever, and you definitely own these lands, and you definitely have the right to collect taxes and tariffs and raise armies and stuff, and that this is passed down based on your lineage, then your blood magically and retroactively changes to be appropriately noble. The problem is *everyone else wants to do that too*, hence the whole system of the more powerful stopping those beneath them from getting out of hand through arms and intimidation and playing them off of each other and all that. So just picking any random jerk knight to help their nonexistent claim, ESPECIALLY when they are trying to kill you, is just stupid. You could instead, try and become a dragon princess by taking over enough lands through guile with the help of this very cooperative human princess you already have working with you.

>>1091507
Why bother with the whole guile stuff? It's much easier than that. Just take a prince. Princesses don't take over their kingdoms, but Princess do. So if she takes a prince, and makes him her mate, she can be a dragon queen. But what about the princess, you might ask? Well, just keep her around too.

Wait a minute... This knight wants to find a princess, claim her as a mate, and gain wealth in the form of a dowry?

HE'S TRYING TO STEAL THE QUEST

Convince the knight to join your follicule.

Yeah, you read that right. PUT HIM IN YOUR HEAD!

Apples 2024/05/23(Thu)18:38 No. 1091647 ID: 435f13
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Enraged by your generous slathering of slime, the White Knight charges at you!

White Knight: "Foul beast! Those who would dare befoul a princess will taste my steel!"

That sword is no match for you. Just do nothing and let him charge at you, and have his sword get bent as soon as he impacts on your knee or something.

Oh shit oh shit, hold the princess in the way!

DODGE!! DODGE WITH THE PRINCESS!!

We're not the smartest dragon, sure, but even we know that sometimes knights have enchanted bullshit. Dodge and let's not take the risk.

Hip check him and his horse into oblivion.

Use your greatest asset and just sit on him.

>>1091649

NO! Do NOT hold the princess in the way! If she dies we can’t kidnap her!

>>1091654

YES! Sitting on him is an excellent display of our strongest ability! Do this one! But make sure he drops his weapon as you sit, and you knock away his weapon with your tail. If he still has his sword while being sat upon, aforementioned tail will be very vulnerable to ouchies from sharp objects!

Engage sit

Lick him too so he is your property too.
Cold steel tastes good.

>>1091671
I support this. Lick the knight too.

>>1091671
Lick the knight and stick him to the princess like a stamp

Hmm. You already kidnapped the princess, so that part is done. Stretch goals tho...

You should scream for help, just like the princess did. If that's how things work around here, then a potential mate should appear to save you.

>>1091684
You think that would work? Either way, i still think booty needs a prince.

"Oh look, I'm putting her boobs between my sharp, serrated teeth."

Lick the knight's crotch area

lick the dick

Kidnap a princess and get a knight? Sounds like a good deal to me.

>>1091647
I can see why hes mad.

When you licked the princess she looked like she experienced a sudden revelation regarding the length of dragon tongues and their various uses.

Hes only a little feller.
You can hold him at arms length with one beclawed arm while threatening to lick the princess again

>>1091692
Support

(1/2) Apples 2024/05/30(Thu)18:57 No. 1092157 ID: 435f13
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>Use your greatest asset and just sit on him.

This knight is ASSuming you're just going to roll over. But you know what happens when you ASSume?

(2/2) Apples 2024/05/30(Thu)18:57 No. 1092158 ID: 435f13
File 171712065099.png - (67.36KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 16.png )

...

Damn you had something for this...

Get squish'd, fool!

>>1092158
Good job! Say, by the way... where might his sword be at now after you sat on him?

Oh no the sword

Nevermind the sword. Lick him and his steed, then start hoarding nobles. Whoever controls the upper class controls the universe, and all the other places too.

Well he's dealt with, now to continue your conversation with this delectable princess. She must know where you can snag some hot princes.

>>1092158
Ask the princess why she was apparently interested in that asshole

Demand lucre, threaten to lick 'er.

Defeating the knight makes the kidnapping complete, doesn't it? You won her, fair and square! Check one off the to-do list.

Now, much ado is being made of this sword. Wherever it's ended up, I think you can count it as a spoil of war. You can start your hoard with that--a sword hoard!

So I guess sit on him until he passes out and ask the princess if she knows of any cute princes nearby. Then once the knight passes out leave the princess with him and just tell her to tell him that he managed to fight you off before passing out in exhaustion or something.

Then leave her to let princesses do to passed out knights when nobody is around and go off and find your prince.

Once the Knight passes out, talk to the Princess to get her story!!

>>1092158
The princess looked curious, confused and a little intrigued by the lick.
Now the knight is buried in a mountain of booty.

Girl, you are awakening fetishes all over today!

+1 for sword hoard! Find that sword! Also, +1 for talk to princess to figure out what’s going on.

Check his pockets for loose change maybe you can start your hoard.

>>1092158
Take off the onights pants see if you can get a quick fuck out of it your booty should be soft and large enough to just deform around him

>>1092158
Show your dominance by twerking the knight into either submission or death. Then ask Princess Tittiana just what the hell is going on, and why she’s trying to seduce that knucklehead.

>>1092157
>This knight is ASSuming you're just going to roll over. But you know what happens when you ASSume?
>>1092158
>Damn you had something for this...
He makes an ASS out of himself!

>>1092160
Improvised butt plug!

>>1092200
Yeah! Steal his stuff!

Twerk on the knight's corpse, then give the grieving princess a breaking speech about the raw force of dragons and how her position is simply the end result of humankind's long con against itself to consolidate power in the only people with predatory instincts as sharp as a dragon's. She is the descendant of vicious, cruel, dishonorable people that can, with the unjust sacrifices of the many, stand up against the overwhelming force of a dragon - she is Bad, and Bad survives. Good men like this knight just die.

Remember the princess had a crush on this knight. Don't murderize him yet at least. That's showing off to less people.

Dress up as a priest(ess), hold the two in your hands, and perform a wedding.

>>1092337
Ah, the perfect ending to the perfect fairy tale. Let's do it.

Like dolls!
Hm.
Knight and princess...
Now you have a breeding pair, you will eventually have MANY princesses and knights!
How many eggs do humans lay in a clutch?
Got to be lots.
Time to start booty freerange princess farms.

>>1092345

That's right! You can breed princesses! o.o

>>1092363
Aren’t they called queens at that point?

>>1092366
After their first clutch.
I dont know what youd call a knight after that...
Rooster? Nah. Maybe a paladin.

Apples 2024/06/09(Sun)19:07 No. 1092751 ID: 435f13
File 171798524517.png - (94.90KB , 800x800 , Booty Dragon 17.png )

>Defeating the knight makes the kidnapping complete, doesn't it? You won her, fair and square! Check one off the to-do list.

Princess Get! +1 point

>Sword Hoard

One sword isn't exactly a hoard. But it's a start.

Hoard Started! +0.5 points

>Kidnap a princess and get a knight? Sounds like a good deal to me.

You can try mating with the knight and see how it works out. If he survives, then you can check that one off the list.

Mate Acquired? +0.5 points for effort.

All in all a good day's work in the life of a dragon!

Good Job!

Quest Ended!

Huzzah!

Double Huzzah!

Back to xbawkslive!

>>1092751
Congratulations booty!
You done did the thing!