[1/4] Stingpie 2025/12/23(Tue)16:30 No. 1119355 ID: 253500
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"Hey, welcome! You're here about the ad? Come in, come in!"
He smiles like an old friend.

[2/4] Stingpie 2025/12/23(Tue)16:30 No. 1119356 ID: 253500
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"I'm glad I finally got a response. I was beginning to think the newspaper was stiffing me! But I guess that's just print nowadays--barely any readership outside of the website."
He leads you through a hallway, not leaving a single breath for you to interject.

[3/4] Stingpie 2025/12/23(Tue)16:31 No. 1119357 ID: 253500
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"Please, sit down! Make yourself comfortable! I'll have everything ready in just a second."
The furniture in this room is all pushed to one side. The two chairs in the room are mismatched, and the one he gestures towards seems the more uncomfortable one.

As you take a seat, he pulls opens the drawers on the desk and pulls out some papers, twine, ink, a knife and a quill. He peers up and sees your expression.

"Oh, sorry!"

He puts the knife back into the drawer.

"It's just a penknife. You use it to repoint a quill."

You get the sneaking suspicion he does not have much company over.

[4/4] Stingpie 2025/12/23(Tue)16:32 No. 1119358 ID: 253500
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He sits down, dipping his quill into the ink as he opens a blank booklet bound with twine.

"Now then, let me explain the rules of the game.-- If you don't have any questions, of course."

No questions here, give us the diggity details dawg.

tell us what we need to know!

Go ahead

"Most Britannians scream at my face and call me a 'filthy Wolfensteiner'. The ones who don't sometimes stay polite so they can stab me in the back.

Are you going to be either of those people?"

[1/1] Stingpie 2025/12/24(Wed)07:29 No. 1119374 ID: 253500
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>>1119362
>"Most Britannians scream at my face and call me a 'filthy Wolfensteiner'. The ones who don't sometimes stay polite so they can stab me in the back. Are you going to be either of those people?"

"My best guess is no, considering I have no idea what you're talking about, but then again, I don't have any idea what your talking about, so for all I know I could be lying through my teeth."

>>1119359
>>1119360
>>1119361
>No questions here, dawg. Tell us what we need to know.

"The rules are simple. We are both 'gods' in this story we write. We pick two heros, and their goal is to kill each other. Of course, we can't directly interfere, or that would ruin the fun. Instead, we can add items to their world, and it is up to them what they do with them."

He pauses for a moment.

"That's the overview at least. Obviously, the characters don't have free will of their own, so we have to do a weird, ranked choice voting scheme to decide what the characters are most likely to do, but that's all implementation."

He makes a quick doodle in the booklet, and holds it up.

"This will be my hero, Tony Razorblades--A two-bit thug charging three bits for a shave and haircut. Now, you get to decide on yours. I wouldn't spend too much time on it, or get too attached. I'm pretty good at this game."

Suggest a name, traits, history, etc. Or just make a doodle of the character. Do whatever you want, I'm not your dad.

Doctor Kleincakes
"Goo-Girl Genius"
Melts into gelatinous goo whenever she gets inspiration to invent something
Can build anything from monsters to mecha
Weakness to heat-based attacks
10,000 Parts
Secret Pocket Lab
500 Jellied Eel Rations

Swiftly Robbinson
Just wants to dance.
will attempt to dance through any thing that tries to stop him.
Just got back from "the mysterious orient" where he learned various martial arts, mistaking them for dances.
Not a dollar to his name.
Might have learned to subsist on sunlight, or was tricked by some mountain people making fun of the dumb tourist.

Joey Thrillkill
aspiring wannabe pianist that only knows three songs. one of songs is so bad it ruptures eardrums and kills. the second gives you the irresistible urge to dance. third is just moonlight sonata with a few keys missing.

inventory:
- 1 piano string
- 1 self-refilling flask
- $5
- a dream

Meep Meep
Living doll in the shape of a plush chibi dragon.
The wings are too cute to fly, they do anyway.
He can create an "Evil Twin" of anyone or anything he looks at. "Evil Twins" are not necessarily evil, they're simply completely inverse in the values held by the target. If the target does not have values or is an object, the resulting twin simply appears backwards.
Has an extremely cute and painless bite that afflicts the victim with a universal allergy, usually causing them to rapidly succumb to anaphylactic shock.
Very much enjoys sugar and will literally do anything you want/become your best friend when offered sweets.

[1/1] Stingpie 2025/12/27(Sat)06:45 No. 1119425 ID: b71c8e
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"Some very good suggestions here."

"I'll put it to a vote, but I will modify the characters a titch. Some of them are too dangerous and some are not dangerous enough."

Doctor Kleincakes—
Melts into gelatinous goo whenever she gets inspiration to invent something
Can build anything from monsters to mecha
Weakness to heat-based attacks
Powers—
- Struck by inspiration: turns into goo, gets an idea or divine hint.
Inventory—
- (10,000) Parts
- (1) Secret Pocket Lab
- (500) Jellied Eel Rations
- (1) Taser

---

Swiftly Robinson—
Just wants to dance.
will attempt to dance through any thing that tries to stop him.
Just got back from "the mysterious orient" where he learned various martial arts, mistaking them for dances.
Might have learned to subsist on sunlight, or was tricked by some mountain people making fun of the dumb tourist.
Powers—
- Swallow the sun: receive a small health boost due to the placebo effect of in sunlight.
- Chinese polka: hit an opponent's limb and briefly paralyze it.
Inventory—
- (1) not a dollar

---

Joey Thrillkill—
aspiring wannabe pianist that only knows three songs. one of songs is so bad it ruptures eardrums and kills.
Powers—
- Joey's opus, first movement: a song so loud and terrible, it stuns the opponent for 2 rounds.
- Joey's opus, second movement: a very catchy tune! Everyone (except Joey) will dance for as long as it plays.
- Joey's opus, third movement: A poor imitation of the moonlight sonata (first movement) does he realize he copied it?
inventory—
- (1) terrible midi keyboard
- (1) piano string
- (1) self-refilling flask (of what, whiskey? Apple juice? Uranium slurry?)
- (1) $5
- (1) a dream

---

Meep Meep—
Living doll in the shape of a plush chibi dragon.
The wings are too cute to fly, they do anyway.
Very much enjoys sugar and will literally do anything you want/become your best friend when offered
Powers—
- Photocopy Phony: Create an "Evil Twin" of anyone or anything he looks at. "Evil Twins" are not necessarily evil, they're simply completely inverse in the values held by the target. If the target does not have values or is an object, the resulting twin simply appears backwards.
- Champ Chomp: Bite a creature. The bite does not hurt, but inflicts a non-lethal allergic reaction.
Inventory—
- (1) a whole lotta nuttin.


"To avoid a situation where every votes for their own idea, please rank each character instead of just voting for a single one. Sounds good?"

Sorry if the formatting is weird. I'm currently moving and I had to do all the writing on my phone.

rank list:
Meep Meep
Kliencakes
Swiftly
Joey

Klein
Meep
Swift
Joey

1- Swiftly Robinson
2- Joey Thrillkill
3- Doctor Kleincakes
4- Meep Meep

Klein
Meep
Joey
Swift

Klein
Swiftly
Joey
Meep

Meeps
Doc Klein
Swift Robby
Joey Thrills

[1/1] Stingpie 2025/12/29(Mon)19:26 No. 1119475 ID: 35d66b
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"Looks like the consensus is to play doctor."

He seems to think that's clever wordplay.

"Well, then. We start with Doctor Kleincakes and Tony Razorblades standing a hundred feet apart on a city street, just giving each other the stink eye."

"Now, we decide what each character is likely to do. I'll give a list of a few basic actions. We rank how likely the characters are to do those actions, and then the characters perform the most likely actions. Of course, I can't enumerate every single action a person could take, so you can 'write-in' a vote."

He pretends to think.

"I think Tony would either... (in no particular order)
1- Charge at Doctor Kleincakes.
2- Throw a razor at Dr K.
3- slink into a nearby alleyway
4- get out of the street because YOU SHOULDN'T STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET.
5- run away.

And Doctor Kleincakes:
1- Charge at Tony
2- Deploy the secret pocket lab [the lab would no longer be secret]
3- run away
4- get out of the street because YOU SHOULDN'T STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET.
5- be struck by inspiration."

"After their actions are squared away, we will provide our assistance."

Discussion thread: https://questden.org/kusaba/questdis/res/144694.html

Kleincakes smiles. The average award-winning scientist does not stand in the middle of the street, waiting for a collision by a sex-trafficking steroid-drenched trucker.

Kleincakes is not an average human. Okay, she's not an award-winner. Or even a decent entity.

She's a genuine genius made of genuine goo.

Kleincakes comes up with an idea just as a criminal car chase crashes into her, splattering her all across the street.

While Razorblades is busy dodging, Kleincakes builds her new invention using each modular blob of herself, until she's built some kind of living street-wide tank.

Inspiration strikes, the perfect device to get out of an awkward social situation like this.

Which becomes irrelevant as she gooifies and can slip into the storm drain to escape

>>1119480
>>1119476
"Let me be a little bit clearer. At this point, you do not write what happens next. Out of the available options, you rank how likely each character is to perform any given action. For example, This is what I think Doctor Kleincakes would do, in order of likelihood.
Doctor Kleincakes:
1) Get out of the road.
2) Run away (Kleincakes' only weapon is non lethal, and Tony Razorblades can easily throw razors)
3) Be struck by a streetcar named inspiration
4) Deploy the pocket lab
5) Charge at Tony.

After everyone ranks the choices, I pick the option voted to be most likely, and then describe what occurs as a result of that action.

Next, we decide what object to add to the world, which is where our influence is truly demonstrated."

In order of likelihood Tony would ...
1. Slink into a nearby alleyway, he seems like the slinking type;
2. Throw a razor at Dr K., playing into his strength;
3. Charge at Doctor Kleincakes, to get into snipsnapping range;
4. Get out of the street because YOU SHOULDN'T STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET, he his a thug, he doesn't care about standing in the middle of the street;
5. Run away, he doesn't have any reason to.

In order of likelihood Doctor Kleincakes would...
1. Be struck by inspiration, she could use a good idea right now;
2. Run away, she is outmatched at the moment;
3. get out of the street because YOU SHOULDN'T STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET, it would at least make the situation somewhat less dangerous;
4. Deploy the secret pocket lab [the lab would no longer be secret], it doesn't really help her;
5. Charge at Tony, the last thing she wants is to get into snipsnapping range.

Razorblade: 21345
Kleincakes: 54321

[1/1] animated Stingpie 2026/01/01(Thu)20:43 No. 1119567 ID: 35d66b
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>>1119512
>>1119514
Tony Razorblade's actions: __7c___d3___Me__ SUM charge | 3 | 4 | 3 | 10 throw | 4 | 5 | 5 | 14 * slink | 5 | 3 | 4 | 12 get out | 2 | 2 | 2 | 6 run | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 Tony Razorblade will throw his razor blades at Doctor Kleincakes. Doctor Kleincakes' actions: __7c___d3___Me__ SUM charge | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 deploy | 2 | 2 | 2 | 6 run | 4 | 3 | 4 | 11 get out | 3 | 4 | 5 | 12 inspire | 5 | 5 | 3 | 13 * Doctor Kleincakes will become inspired.

He confidently tilts his head up.

"Tony Razorblades pulls out a razor and slings it towards Doctor Kleincakes! Unfortunately, Dr. K is too busy thinking to notice it!"

"Just as Dr. K shifts into the customary pose of scientific achievement, Tony's razor slashes strait through her wrist, cutting her hand clean off!"

"She then begins to goo-ify, swearing under her welding mask at the pain of unplanned amputation."

The corners of his mouth pull back like curtains.

"As she crumples under the weight of gravity, she concludes her inspired thought: Melting into goo is a terrible battle tactic, it's hard to do much of anything without bones."

"Now then, what would you like to add? I was thinking that Tony could benefit from a few old pals."

You feel the pressure of his expectant eyes.

The feeling that I've been too terse is sneaking up on me. What I was trying to subtly imply is that now is the time for you all to suggest an item, object, or really anything into the game. The seersucker guy will also add his own thing. Sorry if that was not clear.

Honestly I'm thinking we should just start over. We chose a character who needs to spend time crafting in order to have any battle power at all, and we started with a face to face confrontation so we have no time to craft.
Also apparently our goo power leaves us completely helpless instead of what seemed to be the assumption that we'd be able to move.

Oh she can't move at all? That's kinda an instant fail state isn't it

Unless... she had something prepared for just this situation. Like a big bruiser of a robot to burst through the wall and get between Tony and the doctor. Plus some smaller robo-goons, now its a fight!

While Tony is busy trying to cut Dr Kleincakes to shreds, the hand skitters away. Goo has a way of keeping itself alive.

Kleincakes, now thought dead by Razorblade, will now scheme to invent a device that will show him up and put him in the ground!
Mostly with magnets, but also with mad-scientist sharpness inhibitor, which has deleterious effects in all non-amorphous life forms.

>>1119634
>>1119637
What if we summoned Meep Meep like a Pokemon? The Evil Twin ability alone should tie up Tony long enough for The doc to do... *Something*

At least being a slime should stop the bleeding...

I'd say a sudden castle wall separating the Doc from Tony would be good right now.
Said wall would have the exterior side facing Tony, of course, and include loyal minions, assorted defensive tools and a flashy standard (the cloth kind of standard, to be clear). A moat would be an optional but welcome addition.

[1/3] Stingpie 2026/01/09(Fri)09:14 No. 1119850 ID: 35d66b
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"For my addition, Tony will recieve the aid of his posse."

"From out of the shadows, Tony's gang appears. Most are faceless mooks, but one has a personality trait."
"Manny Menthol slouches as he pulls out a cigarette and lights it. His abilities and inventory are unknown to Dr. Kleincakes."

[2/3] Stingpie 2026/01/09(Fri)09:15 No. 1119851 ID: 35d66b
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"Suddenly, a robot awkwardly sidesteps in front of docotor Kleincakes."
"It is one of her designs, the 'Mobile Castle' which is really just heavy shielding attached to a moving platform."
"Piloting the robot is Meep Meep, Doctor Kleincakes' unique marketable plushie."
"Being her minion, Kleincakes knows Meep Meep's abilities, and can instruct him to use them."
"She also knows his akrasia towards sugar, and that he may be tempted by a sweeter offer."

"Kleincakes: 'Excellent, Meep! You can have a little bit of chocolate as a treat when this is all over.'"
"Meep Meep chirps in delight."


Sorry about the degraded quality in this panel. I'm procrastinating hard, and I realized I wouldn't get this out in the next few days if I didn't push it out now.

[3/3] Stingpie 2026/01/09(Fri)09:15 No. 1119852 ID: 35d66b
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"Now, it's time to make choices."

"Rank each action."

"Kleincakes:
1- Run away
2- Get out of the street.
3- Abscond through the sewers
4- Invent some fantastical 'anti-sharpness device'
5- Deploy the pocket lab
6- Charge
7- Command Meep Meep to bite Tony.
8- Command Meep Meep to create an evil twin of Tony.
9- Command Meep Meep to pilot the robot and charge into Tony.

And Tony:
1- Throw a second razor.
2- Get out of the street
3- Run
4- Slink into an alleyway.
5- Charge
6- Command Manny to use a special ability.
7- Command faceless mooks to attack."

He tilts his head down, but still focuses his eyes on you.

"It should be noted that Kleincakes has not been paralyzed or neutralized in any way. Turning into goo is a poor tactic, but not a death sentence. In addition to her regular turn, Kleincakes could muse on goo-Purely for your own edification."

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